Let Go
by Admiral Daala
Summary: There has not been one life that Order 66 has not touched. Many have tried to move on, make new lives for themselves while others continue to run from their demons. Will they realize they have a future or will they let their past destroy everything?
1. Chapter 1

_Hi All,_

_This is a continuation from You're a Dream to Me and Awake & Alive. If you have not read those yet, I suggest taking a peek at them, this story will make more sense if you do. _

_I hope you enjoy and please review! Thank you!_

_I do now own Star Wars_

* * *

><p>"Ahs'ika, do you know how this all started?" Rex, former captain of the now infamous 501st Battalion breathlessly said as he heaved a heavy bale of hay to the hungry eopies who were impatiently pushing each other out of the way for their food.<p>

Rex and Ahsoka had not talked much about their fateful night which it had changed their destiny forever. Order 66 had been issued to all clone officers and deemed all Jedi as traitors to the Republic, to the Chancellor and were to be exterminated sight on seen. Anyone who sought to disobey such order was also deemed a traitor and was not to be tolerated. For Rex, his loyalty to the GAR, to his creators and his loyalty to his heart had been severely tested.

If it hadn't been for his brother Fives, Rex might have become what he had feared the most. He would have proven right to every civilian that ever had the notion that clones were nothing but synthetic beings, nothing better than drones and he would have submitted without question. Thanks to Fives for making him wake up and realize what he was about to do and thanks to the love Ahsoka had for him, he had not pulled the trigger.

Together they had made a home for the last year and a half on Saleucami with Cut Lawquane, a clone who had deserted well before the order and his beautiful family on a secluded farm away from the trials and warfare at least for the moment.

The young Torguta _woman_ Rex grunted with a smirk as he watched Ahsoka finish watering the animals.

"What start Rex?" She grimaced as the water from the hose sprayed across her legs. She fumbled for a minute before getting the hose turned off and then wiping her hands together to rid of the excess dirt. She examined the eopies with satisfaction as they gurgled and grunted with contentment and then turned to Rex.

"Do you ever think about what happened that night? About the reason why we are standing here and not…" Rex trailed off and scratched his now grown out golden locks awkwardly.

"You mean me not dead and you still in the military?" Ahsoka pierced the ex-clone captain with a cool stare. They had treaded lightly on the subject, worried that each would be stepping on thin ice and reopening deep wounds. It had taken months before Ahsoka fully felt comfortable in Rex's presence even with the sacrifice he had committed for her. Rex couldn't fault Ahsoka completely, not with her former master's betrayal, his brethren slaughtering her comrades and him almost taking her own life. With finding the wrong with his brother's help he had eventually gained her full trust, _well__almost_. Ever since then they looked toward the future and tried not to look back. Even conversations about Fives, Bella and Mandalore dwindled, and even with Rex's persistent denial about not belonging there, she could feel though the Force his longing to be with his brother.

"Well, sort of," Rex held out his hand and helped her make her way through the thick mud and made their way toward the barn. "I know you don't like to talk about it, but it has been on my mind quite a bit."

"You miss them," Ahsoka wasn't mad or angry. In fact she wasn't sure how she felt. Numb maybe. Ahsoka always thought about that night, their flight away from hell and what could have been the end. She had nightmares that she never shared for it would only send those who would listen into endless nightmares of their own. "You want to go back to your troops, to your men don't you?"

"Yes, no, not to them," Rex tossed down his work gloves and flopped himself on the large bale of hay and looked up at the woman in front of him. "Those men, I don't know them anymore. They would shoot me without a second thought. That world out there, it's a world of chaotic order. Right is left, and to defend the helpless is weak. No, that's not what I was made for or want to go back to."

"Then what is it you want?" Ahsoka folded her arms across her midsection, warding off the chill in the air and the cold she felt building within her.

Rex sighed. "We haven't gone into town for a long time."

"Cut and Sue said it wasn't safe, that a royal guard was there," Ahsoka defended.

"That was a couple of months ago. Regardless we haven't stepped outside of the farm." Rex quickly got up from his spot on the cushiony hay pile and stepped in front of Ahsoka. He took her by the elbows and looked down at her, hoping that she would look him in the eye. "It's okay Ahsoka to be afraid, but you shouldn't have to live and breathe in it."

"What if they find us Rex, what if he finds me?" Ahsoka shrugged out of Rex's gripped and took a couple of steps back from him. Sapphire gems glittered with angry unshed tears and she refused to let them fall. "I would never forgive myself if he found you. Not after what you had to part with."

Rex gritted his molars together and took a deep, calming breath. Not to be discouraged, he stepped up to her once again and took her firmly by the arms, "I will fight until my last breath is drawn before anything or anyone will hurt you. You got that?"

"This is different," she growled. "You could never stop the beast that my master has become."

"I'll die trying."

"That's what I'm afraid of. Rex, I can't lose you not to such darkness and pointlessness. I am not the same girl I use to be. I cannot, will not give into the temptation of the Force." She whispered harshly. "You know I have not used it since being here."

"Maybe it's time for you to try again," Rex suggested lightly.

"No," Ahsoka quickly snarled. "No, no no, Rex! Maybe you just don't understand, never understood how easily it would be for any Jedi hunter to find me, for him to track us down. I will not be responsible for anyone's death but my own."

"Soka," Rex started, but stopped. They were just going to go round and round in a vicious circle and end right back where they started with nothing accomplished. How were they ever going to be a true couple if she couldn't see that he was her partner, in life and death? How much more did he have to prove to her?

"Okay Ahs'ika, maybe another time," Rex soothed. "When you're ready we'll talk. There will be a time when we need to talk."

"I know," resigned, she fell into his comforting embrace and they stood in the barn letting the peaceful noises of the farm calm away their nerves.

* * *

><p>As the pair made their way back to the Lawquane home Ahsoka's interest began to grow and turned to her partner. "How did this all start Rex?"<p>

"Are you sure you want to talk about it?" he treaded cautiously especially knowing how sensitive the young woman was.

"You're the one who originally brought it up my curiosity is peaking. Please, tell me," Ahsoka urged.

Memories began to flood Rex as he recalled old friends, brothers, generals and his beloved 501st. Kicking off his muddied boots thoughts of two particular troopers came to mind and where his journey to finding his heart truly began. His chest compressed with angst as he recalled the mission to the Citadel and the selflessness of Echo's bravery which led to his ultimate doom. _Everything __happens __for __a __reason, __though __the __loss __of __life __is __never __a __good __enough __reason._

Rex was brought back to reality as he felt a soft hand prying his clenched paw apart. He had unconsciously clinched it so hard into a fist that his knuckles started turning white and left indents into his palm.

Sensing the storm brewing within, Ahsoka slipped her hand into his offering silent support.

The soft shuffle of feet distracted Rex and Ahsoka before he could begin his story and they turned to the new presence. Cut's lovely wife Suu, a native to Saleucami, mother to Jek and Shaeeah and who took Rex in when he was injured during battle, appeared behind the screen door. Illuminated by the dim light inside, it made her fuchsia skin glimmer and outlined her perfect athletic figure. While gentle and compassionate to her children, husband and those close to her, Suu was no pushover when it came to defending her farm or those she loved. Behind the beauty; the mother was an aggressive and strong-willed woman and knew how to handle a rifle.

Ahsoka and Rex found themselves fortunate to have her as a friend and for Ahsoka, a mentor and almost mother-like figure.

"Rex, you have an incoming call," Her elegant voice broke the silence and alerted the couple.

Giving Ahsoka a perplexed look he answered, "Thank you Suu." Ahsoka was just as baffled as the ex-captain. Who could be calling them? Why? As he could read her mind, Rex shrugged his large shoulders and entered the house to take the call.

Suu stepped out onto the porch as Rex passed by her and Ahsoka watched him until his silhouette could no longer be traced. "Who is it Suu?" Calm is what Ahsoka wanted to feel, wanted to present to her friend, but her insides fluttered like Corellian Field Butterflies. She had an inclination of who was calling Rex.

"Fives, young Ahsoka," Suu confirmed Ahsoka's suspicions. Not that it was bad that Fives was calling, but why now? After this lapse in time with no communication, what was so special about now? Rex was sure to fill her in, but her curiosity was killing her.

"Come, sit with me," Suu patted the porch swing and gestured for the young woman to sit next to her. Suu had been more than just a friend; she had been a mentor to Ahsoka in the year and a half that they had known each other. While Anakin had taught her the ways of the Force, to fight and to survive through war, Suu had taught and tendered to Ahsoka's needs of being a woman-a young woman transitioning into an unknown civilian world. She had listened to Ahsoka's rants when she didn't want Rex to hear, been a shoulder to cry on when she couldn't let Rex know she had broken down and answered questions that her former master had avoided and others had no time to answer for her. She owed Suu so much and would find a way to repay the family somehow.

"Fives?" Ahsoka tried to keep the surprise coming from her mouth, but was unsuccessful. She settled next to Suu on the swing and stared out onto the ongoing field.

"Does it trouble you that much that he is contacted by his brother?" The older woman asked.

Ahsoka jerked her head causing her lekku to hit her in the face. "No of course not!" Suu raised a skeptical brow. "Well, I guess a little."

"Why?"

The question was actually really simple. _Why? __Because __I __know __he__'__ll __want __to __leave __this __sanctuary. __I __will __have __to __go __and __face __the __world._

"Suu, I don't know if I am ready yet," Cringing, Ahsoka hated to admit that weakness within.

"No one is ever ready young one," Suu lightly tugged on Ahsoka's montrals.

"But what if we are found, what if he finds me!" Ahsoka's voice rose as the thought of the monster her former master had become formed in her mind. "I don't think I'm strong enough to stand up to him. I'm weak, so weak. I don't know how Rex can stand it."

"You've never talked to Rex about your fears have you?"

"I can't, Suu." Ahsoka ground out.

"Why?" Suu asked again.

_Again __with __the __why! _Ahsoka sighed frustrated. "Because he has enough to worry about that's why."

"And you think he doesn't worry about you and the burden you carry every day? Maybe he wants to share that with you and maybe you should share some of his. That's what a partnership is about young Ahsoka, especially when you get married." Suu looked down at her with motherly wisdom as Ahsoka's blue eyes budged out of her head.

"Mar..married? Rex hasn't said anything to me about getting married!" Ahsoka sputtered. Suu slightly smiled.

"You both adore each other, it is inevitable that you will bond one day," at the mention of bonding made Ahsoka's orange cheeks slightly glow. "Or make it true and honorable. But before you can do that, you need to come to some truths and understandings with each other. You can't hold onto this dark cloud by yourself. Trust me, I know."

The two women sat in silence for a little bit, letting the creak and moans of the old wooden swing fill the void.

"I still have a lot of growing up to do, don't I?" Realization of how much Ahsoka still didn't know began to weigh down onto her world.

"We're forever learning don't let that get you down," Suu squeezed her friend's hand. "Just don't shut out the ones who love you and will help you grow and heal." Ahsoka placed her other hand on top of Suu's.

"I am beginning to realize that family is something the Jedi shouldn't have discarded so lightly. Thank you for letting me and Rex be a part of yours," the young Torguta wistfully said.

"Just make sure you invite all of us to your wedding and the birth of your first child!" Suu laughed and grabbed Ahsoka into a hug.

"Whoa, wait, we have to get through a few things before Rex and I talk about marriage let alone a child!" Ahsoka gasped but then fell into a fit of giggles. It felt good laughing as it eased some of the tension off of her chest and shoulders.

"I know young one, one day you'll know when it is right. Both of you will know and let the world be yours." Suu hugged her friend one more time and then left Ahsoka to her thoughts.

* * *

><p>Later Ahsoka entered the home and found Rex in the study, his back to the door.<p>

"Rex?" Tentatively she called out and waited to see if he would answer her. Frustration, conflict and longing leaked through the cracks of his tightknit barriers and as he blew out a breath a few of his golden tresses fluttered upward.

Ahsoka had teased Rex about growing out his hair, but it gave him a striking look. It was a luxury that she would never have and admired how baby fine it felt as she ran her fingers through the silken curls. He was at first self-conscious about growing it out, but after he raised trimmers to his head and Ahsoka practically begged him not to cut it; Rex relented and left his hair alone. Ahsoka explained that her teasing was all well and good and promised not to give him such a hard time about it. At least for a little bit.

"Rex?" She gently touched his back and could feel his muscles bunch under her hand. What had she done to cause such tension?

"I assume that Suu told you that it was Fives who called, am I correct?" Rex's voice was very guarded.

"Yes," Ahsoka answered in the same tone. _Don__'__t __start__…__you __won__'__t __get __anywhere __building __shields __around __each __other. _Changing her tone into a softer, patient timbre she repeated, "Yes Rex, she told me it was Fives."

"Bella is pregnant and is due in a couple months. So is Ordo's wife. It's practically a nursery over there," Rex halfheartedly informed his companion.

"Is that why he called you?" Rex finally turned around and faced the girl, giving her an incredulous look.

"Why would he call me just for that?"

Also becoming frustrated with his standoffishness and suddenly wanting to push her away, Ahsoka gave an irritated huff and growled, "I don't know Rex. Maybe it's because you won't tell me anything. It's not like I can read your mind!"

"You might be able to read me better if you used the Force like you were taught instead of hiding from it," Rex bit back.

"I can't!" Ahsoka drew her hand away from Rex as if she had been burned by him. "You know I can't."

Rex shook his head. "You can't or you won' t Ahsoka? Iknow there is danger out there, but that never made you afraid before."

"You'll never understand Rex," shes napped.

"Why is that? Just because I don't have Jedi powers doesn't meanI won't understand. I have to hide from my fellow troopers who by the way have all the same face and voice and also my former general. I may not have the connection that you had to your master, but don't think for a minute that Idon't understand the loss or fear of being caught," Rex's nostrils flared as he tried to control his temper.

"You know," she pointed an upset finger at the man, but as her hand began to tremble she put it back down at her side and tried to calm herself. "I'm tired of fighting with you Rex. There are reasons that I don't use the Force and you know why. We continue to keep going in circles about this and I want to be done. You either need to accept thatI am done being a Force user or figure out your own way to deal with it. But next time you try and lecture me about not being open, just remind yourself about this moment. This is why we can't get past our secrets." Ahsoka spun on her heals and was about to march out of the room when Rex with lighting quick reflexes made a grab for her thin arm. She looked down at his large fingers that could inflict so much harm, but held her gently in place and if she truly wanted out of his grasp all she would have to do was give a simple tug.

"Wait," he lightly commanded and she did. Following every movement with her big saffron eyes, she watched as he struggled to find the right words. Rex chewed on his cheek in anxiety, twisted his lips in uneasiness and then opened and closed them a couple of times until his lovely accented voice, deepened into a thick baritone of awkward emotion finding the words he was looking for.

"I need to go to Mandalore," the statement might have shocked Ahsoka any other time, but she had felt his need to be with his brother many of occasions even without the help of the Force. "When Fives told me he was about to become a father, something inside of me awakened." His russet colored eyes bore into her and goosepimples began to pop upon her flesh.

"We have known each other for along time Ahs'ika, been through hell and back and probably will face more demons in the future. We've been with each other, at each other-I want to be done fighting with you. But if that's the only way to hear your voice, then I'll argue with you all day."

_What __is __he __doing? __Weren__'__t __we __just __fighting? __Wasn__'__t __he __just __pushing __me __away __a __minute __ago? __I __don__'__t __understand! __Is __this __some __unfulfilled __male __need __to __have __a __mate?_The Jedi woman's heart began to beat faster as her lover continued talking.

"I don't want to miss out on anything more than I already, we already have," Rex finally stood up from his seat. He seemed gigantic, almost imposing as he loomed over Ahsoka.

"Rex," Ahsoka gulped. "Are you asking me to marry you?"

"If you'll have me?" Hope filtered through him.

"We have so much to work through," Ahsoka shook her head, but didn't back away. "I don't think you are ready to be a husband and I don't think I am ready to be a wife. Not yet."

"We can do it together. I know…" he started but Ahsoka cut him off.

"Do you? Do you know? Do you know how much more danger you'll be in if you take someone like me as your wife?" She narrowed her eyes at him. "Do you remember that girl who was killed at the checkpoint right before we made it onto the speeder?"

_This __is __not __what __I __had __in __mind. __She __was __supposed __to __say __yes __and __be __happy,_ Rex thought miserably. "How could I forget," somberly he answered.

"I asked Sergeant Skirata before we left and he told me the tragic story about her. The girl was a Jedi as well and she was married to a clone and they had a child together. After her death he couldn't cope with her loss and now is on a mission to kill the Jedi he finds. Rex, have you ever thought about what would happen if and when that time comes for me? What would you do? I love you Rex, with everything that I am, but we both hide behind walls of secrets and rages. Are you ready to let go and share everything with me? I don't think I am. I know how selfish this is sounding but we both know it's the truth." His grip loosened and slipped from her arm. When he had no answer for her, she nodded faintly. "Why is it that you need to go to Mandalore now?"

Anger swirled in the pit of his stomach and started to rise in his throat as bile of abhorrent words threatening to spill out. Grimacing, he swallowed it back down where it sat as a rock.

How could she reject him after all this time? She was supposed to say yes dammit! And he didn't know what he would do if she died, probably go insane just as his latter has done. His shoulders slumped in exhausted defeat when he realized she was right. They had to get through their personal hurdles first, but that didn't mean he wouldn't try again later. _In __the __GAR __I __knew __so __much, __men __looked __up __to __me __for __advice; __here __I __am __so __lost. __As __a __civilian, __I __know __nothing._

"Fives couldn't say exactly why over the comm, but he said it was extremely important to the health of all clones and would only be a benefit if we made the journey." He murmured.

"To Mandalore," Ahsoka repeated.

Rex nodded. "To Mandalore."

A slight sigh escaped her soft lips. "I guess I can't hide here forever can I?"

A faint smile cracked his lips. "We'll make it through all this my Ahsoka. I promise you I'll show you I can be the protector you need and husband you secretly crave."

She gave a snort and lightly shoved him on the shoulder. Now with the friction somewhat broken, Ahsoka mirrored Rex's smirk, "You are already the protector I need, Rexster. So when do we leave?"

* * *

><p>Even after a year and a half of being away from military life, Rex still had a hard time believing that he was able to be standing in a round pin helping to break the few eopies deemed suitable for riding and packing.<p>

The eopie currently in the pin with Rex decided it had enough of jogging in a circle, stopped and turned to look at him. "Don't do it buddy," Rex warned ,slowly shortening the rope that was tied to the eopie's halter so that it was no longer dragging on the ground. Rex clucked to the animal to make him move forward, but instead the stubborn bull began to raise its long neck which only caused the pressure of the halter to tighten on his head. The eopie cried out in protest and reared, pulling Rex almost off his feet and right into the ground.

"Oh no you don't, get up there," Rex barked at the angry bull who shied away and bucked as hard as he could, jumping and kicking out at Rex, squealing in protest, leaping in the air twisting his head and trying to pull away from his handler; causing rope burn on his hands. Rex tossed the end of the excess rope at the eopie's butt to keep him moving and after one more kick at Rex for good measure, the bull finally settled down into a lope.

"You could have a profession in the eopie wrangling business if you wanted to. You seem to have a natural knack for that sort of thing," the ever familiar accent of his clone brother drew Rex's focus to Cut: former clone soldier, friend and some what of a mentor to Rex. Cut, who had his foot propped up on one of the round pin boards and leaned casually over to watch Rex with th eeopie bull looking ever the part of the farmer, father and civilian with secret lethality ready to spring at a moment's notice.

"Whoa," Rex called gently to the eopie who gladly stopped and turned to look at him once again. The beast this time regarded his handler with a bit of a weary but respectful eye as Rex slowly approached the bull. "Easy fella," Rex held out his hand for the bull to sniff. The eopie's warm sniffles left dirt and snot on Rex's hand, and once the bull realized Rex was no longer a threat he heaved a great sigh and a new trust between human and beast was bull waited for his master's next command.

With a pat on the neck, Rex led the bull over to Cut. "Maybe in another lifetime," Rex pushed the eopie away as it tried to rub his itchy head against his chest. "I thought I would give you a head start on breaking a couple of the good ones before Ahsoka and I leave."

Cut raised a surprised brow at the mention of departure. "Finally had enough of the farm life?" Cut joked.

Rex slightly smiled. "No nothing like that. In fact, I am much indebted to you and your family for taking Ahsoka and me in."

Cut waved Rex off. "We've been through this before Rex." Cut opened the gate for Rex so he could lead the pushy bull back out into the pasture where his herd mates awaited for him. Rex shanked the lead, teaching the large animal that it wasn't okay for him to step on his handler. The bull popped his head in the air again, but backed off and walked respectfully beside Rex.

"I will find someway to pay you back, I promise. Cut, let me ask you something." The younger eopies out in the pasture began chirping and mewing excitedly as their pasture mate was coming to join them. The bull began to prance in place and call back to his friends. He shook his head in impatience. "Quit," Rex scolded and finally got the halter off and both men watched as the bull galloped off to join his buddies.

"A twhat point did you know that this was the life you wanted? That the GAR, the men you were born with trained side by side and fought on the same battlefield were no longer home? How did you decide that this," Rex gestured with his hand out toward the pasture of eopies, to the crops they had planted and were just now beginning to grow through the fertile soi land to the old house he had called sanctuary, "That this was going to be your way of life forever?"

Turning around and resting his elbows onto the pasture gate, Cut regarded Rex thoughtfully. The man standing before him may have been a confident, well- respected soldier where many troopers looked up to him for guidance and leadership, having the only worries of not letting his general down and staying alive. Probably the idea of being a citizen never even occurred to the ex captain even in the midst of having a relationship with the young Jedi. Now without the rules and restrictive walls of the military, Rex was no longer the confident trooper, but an unsure orphan thrown into a busy bazar and told to fend for himself.

Much like what Suu had done for Ahsoka, Cut had taken Rex under his wing and shown him the civilian ways of life; how to sustain the farm and tending to the livestock. Rex hadn't questioned Cut much about relationships, specifically his and Ahsoka's, but Cut was no fool. He could see the tension between the two, the guarded secrets which kept them divided, the arguments Rex would have about Ahsoka not using her powers, him not understanding why, her not understanding his need to leave the farm occasionally. They would always come back to each other, but old wounds were never healed, new wounds opened, questions left unanswered and the need to understand each other left unfulfilled.

"I came to the realization Rex that if the GAR truly wanted, needed me they wouldn't have left me or my brothers to die. I can't say that when I look up into the stars at night, especially when it's clear and they are shinning bright that sometimes the old pangs of brotherhood creep up on me." Cut pushed himself off the railing and turned back to face the eopies. "We aren't too different from them you know."

"You are referring to their need to be in a herd?" Rex questioned.

Cut nodded. "Their instinct is to be in a group, not far from their friends and brothers. They are familiar and feel safer there. Some, like the bull you worked with today will become more accustom to being away from his herd with maturity and work, but the need will always be in the back of his mind just not the obsession. Others, no matter what you do will never be able to leave and always act within the herd."

"I asked Ahsoka to marry me and she said no," Rex kicked a chunk of dirt into the pasture causing the eopie herd to look up startled their way.

"Maybe she sensed your need to be back with your herd." Cut rested a calloused hand on Rex's shoulder. "You were able to break away once, but do you think you'd be able to resist joining the stampede next time? Take this time to learn, grow and decide who Captain Rex," Cut poked Rex in the chest to emphasize his point, "is and what he wants. You'll be surprised at what you'll find."

The two men began to make their way back to the house Rex had much to think about. "I don't ever remember being this unsure about anything in my life, granted my life hasn't been that long. I always knew where to step, what the rules were, who to go to and mostly who I could rely on. Nobody ever thought to train us to play the civilian role," Rex dejectedly said.

"Nobody ever thought we were more than droids," Cut pointed out. "There's no manual to life Rex."

* * *

><p><em>I don't know how eopies are really broken to ride or used as pack animals (obviously since they aren't real), but I referenced a bit of my knowledge of working with young horses. They can be tricky and brats at the beginning stages.<br>_

_I want to say thank you to Laloga for very helpful suggestions with the story =) _


	2. Chapter 2

Two very short days later Ahsoka found herself in a dilemma she had never faced before. Being with the GAR and Anakin Skywalker for threey ears had taught her to pack lightly and only the essentials, but she didn't have much just as a Jedi Padawan. In the time she had spent as a civilian she had accumulated many items such as clothing and miscellaneous articles. _What __should __I __bring? __Arg, __is __this __what __normal __girls __worry __about?_

"Ahsoka, are you about ready to go?" Rex's honeyed accent echoed from the refresher.

"Almost," she responded slowly.

"Kid, I have never known you not to be ready on a moment's notice. What's got you tied up?" Rex stepped out of the refresher and Ahsoka's mouth dropped to the floor.

"You're hair…" she finally managed to choke out.

"Oh yeah," Rex ran his hand through his now freshly shaven head. Ahsoka dropped the piece of clothing she had in her hand and walked up to him and lightly touched the now fuzz that was his hair. "It's easier to manage," he tried to explain.

"You, you…" Ahsoka wasn't going to tell him that she adored his long locks and this look reminded her of the clone captain and the days in the military. Both fond and terrible memories of her time as a Jedi and working side by side with him in the GAR, but she pushed the pain back down and forced herself not to let just a haircut get to her. She cleared her throat and found her voice, "you look good Rex. You always do."

She retracted her hand and both stood awkwardly until Rex turned his attention toward the pile of belongings Ahsoka had tossed on her duffle.

"You're not packed?" He was surprised.

"No efficient one, I'm not," grumbling under her breath, Ahsoka returned to the bedside. "I don't know how girls deal with this. I don't remember ever having this issue before."

"You've never had a variety to pick from before either," there was humor in Rex's voice and Ahsoka glared at him from the corner of her eye. "Mandalore can get cold and hot. We are going in the spring so it can go either way."

"That doesn't help," she humph. After a few more minutes between yeses and no's of picking out clothes Ahsoka was finally packed and they said their final farewells to the Lawquane family.

* * *

><p>The ride to Saleucami's main port was quiet as Rex drove the borrow speeder and Ahsoka continued to look out the glass window and onto the vast grasslands. Dawn in light silken robes to cover her face and a form fitting but comfortable flight suit, Ahsoka made sure to take the precaution to have a disguise while traveling in public. As did Rex since his face was one of a million, but his was a bit easier to disguise as he just put on dark sun goggles to cover his eyes and civilian clothing. No Imperial trooper would be wearing such a thing.<p>

As they entered the city's limits Ahsoka pushed herself away from the window and made sure the coverings over her mouth and forehead were secure. Busy with traders looking to make a quick buck, spacers ready for the next cargo and natives walking along the streets, Ahsoka felt unease at being in such a public place. She would usually use the Force by now to seek out any potential danger, but the potential danger was using the Force. Instead, she clamped down on her barriers and relied on good old fashion instincts.

Rex slowed the speeder to a halt outside what looked to be the local cantina, usually where spacers hung out to pick up their next delivery. "Is there someone specifically we should be looking for?" Ahsoka tried to keep her racing heart down to somewhat normalcy.

Rex shook his head. "They didn't send anyone here, but I'm sure there's someone who will take us with no questions asked." He took her hand and gave it a reassuring squeeze. "We've been trained by the best whether they have turned their backs on us now, we know what to do. We can do this my Ahsoka."

"Okay Rex," she lightly whispered. Gathering up their duffels, Rex checked his blaster making sure it was fully loaded and holstered it at his side. Ahsoka stowed her lightsabers deep inside her duffel _sorry__old__friend_and also had a blaster on each of her hip. They strode into the cantina with confidence and swagger as if they did business in these dark and dank places all the time. Rex walked in before Ahsoka and scoped out the place, never taking off his dark goggles and Ahsoka peered behind him, eyes narrowed as if looking for her target.

Patrons in the cantina turned to their two new guests, but most paid no mind. A few gave Ahsoka a double glance which she clearly ignored and Rex gripped her waist tightly showing those who had any thoughts to make a move that this female was clearly taken.

They walked to the bar and placed their belongings down at their feet. "Drink?" The beefy bartender gruffly asked.

"Not here for a drink but for a ride," Rex answered.

The bartender glared at Rex for a moment whose face didn't twitch one muscle. "Lots of pilots here. Depends where you want to go," he pushed for further information.

"Where we want to go is none of your concern," Ahsoka listened to the exchange, but continued to look for a potential pilot or trouble.

There was a clank of what sounded like coins being tossed on the counter and she peered over her shoulder and couldn't help but gawk at how much Rex was offering the slimy bartender for some information.

"Rex," she hissed at him and he chose to ignore her.

"I want a good pilot, one who knows how to keep his mouth shut," voice low and deadly, Ahsoka had only heard him use that tone one other time and it brought shivers down her back.

"Well that will cost you a little extra," the greedy bartender drooled over the credits. With precision and lightening quick reflexes that only could have been trained into him, Rex whipped out his blaster and held it under the barkeep's chin.

The people in the bar interest began to peek and Ahsoka's hands rested on her blasters. _Don__'__t __make __a __scene __Rex, _she silently begged.

"Okay, okay, put your gun away," the bartender raised his hands in defeat. "That one," he pointed to a small figure at the end of the bar. "That one will help you out." Rex holstered his blaster and glared at the man in front of him.

"You better be right."

"I am," the barkeep gulped and then quickly skedaddled away from Rex.

"What do you think?" Rex murmured against Ahsoka's ear.

"I think you shouldn't make such a scene," she reached up and stroked his cheek that was covered in two day old stubble. "But I think he's telling the truth."

She could feel him nod against her. "Okay then, let's meet our prospective pilot then."

Grabbing their belongings they approached the pilot with caution. This person could be anybody: an Imperial under cover, smuggler; a slaver. Ahsoka and Rex took in this person's appearance with great detail. The pilot was built small and looked even smaller as he or she was hunched over their drink. The orange flight suite looked a size too big and had seen better days with the grease stains and patches covering a variety of holes.

A well-worn spacer's helmet covered his or her head, though a few wisps of red-gold strands had found their way from under the helmet. Rex leaned on the counter one side of the pilot and Ahsoka took up a barstool on the other side.

The pilot cocked its head up a little to look at the new intruders. "Can I help you?" a sharp but distinctly feminine voice asked. Ahsoka and Rex were both a bit surprised to learn that this pilot was a woman. There weren't many women spacers, especially the hard life that came with being a pilot.

"Perhaps," Ahsoka carefully answered. "We need safe passage and no questions asked. You came recommended."

The woman sat up straighter and Ahsoka got a good look at her. Porcelain skin that of an Aderaanian glass doll, blemished with a mean jagged scar that started well under her helmet and went under her left eye across her nose to the right side of her jaw, but this woman held a haunted beauty. Dark brown eyes that probably once held life and laughter only possessed deep seated harshness and anguish. It reminded Ahsoka that everyone had been affected by the war someway or another. Faded laugh lines faintly creased the corners of the woman's mouth and her lips seemed not to have seen a smile in quite sometime. Ahsoka was glad at this very moment she had decided not use the Force, she could only imagine the pain this woman would be projecting.

Glancing to her left at Rex and then back at Ahsoka, and narrowed her dark eyes. "No questions huh, well Idon't have any if the price is right."

"The price will be right," Rex answered. The woman became very still at the sound of Rex's voice and Ahsoka had a dreadful feeling something wasn't right. The woman swiveled back around to face Rex who was still wearing his stone cold expression, but a slight tick started at the corner of his mouth.

"Where is it you are going? I'll have to at least know the destination to get you there." She directed the question at Rex.

_What __is __going __on? _Ahsoka wanted to shout but held her tongue.

"Mandalore," tersely Rex answered.

"Echo?" the woman whispered in disbelief. "No, you can't be. He's dead."

"Who are you?" Ahsoka demanded in a rush.

"Please follow me," the woman threw a few credits for the bartender and hurried out of the cantina.

"Rex?" Ahsoka asked.

"Come on," he quickly made his way out with the young Jedi at his heals.

"Rex, do you know who this is? Or what we are doing?" Ahsoka inquired uncertainly as she jogged to keep up with his longer stride.

"I have a feeling," Rex didn't elaborate on his feeling as they rounded a corner and nearly collided with the pilot.

"Okay, are you going to tell us what is going on?" Ahsoka pushed the duffel further up her arm as it kept trying to slide off.

"I'm sorry," the woman apologized. She looked around her, as if someone might have been following them. Her voice hushed she said, "I know who you are."

The couple balked. "Our disguises are that see-through?" Ahsoka flinched.

The woman shook her head. "I recognized your accent because Iworked so closely with the troops and was really good friends with one."

"Echo…" Rex repeated the fallen officer's name and then it suddenly dawned on him. "You're Thea!" Rex gasped.

With a small nod, Thea set her jaw firm. She wasn't going to let old memories make her fall apart now. "I can get you off planet. Meet me at docking bay eight in ten minutes."

She turned to leave as Rex called out, "Thea," she stopped and waited for him to continue, "For what it's worth, Echo died honorably. And because of him, he saved Fives and our lives as well." Thea stood frozen in place for a brief moment and then continued onto her ship.

Rex peered down at his companion who only looked at him with questioning eyes. "This is the beginning of the story. I'll explain on the way there," he said.

"Ah, why not tell us now Rex?" A dark, ominous, but very familiar voice said from behind.

Ahsoka and Rex swung around and couldn't believe their eyes. Poised with a blaster in hand and nerves taught for any reaction from his prey, Commander Cody was the last person the couple had ever thought they would see. The armor this man was wearing was only something Rex had heard about and had never seen. Usually worn by special ops ARC troopers, the black bulky plates that covered his body made Cody look like a bulldog instead of the lithe trooper he was. His HUD was clipped onto his utility belt so that he could look upon his prey with his own eyes. Old and recent blaster scorches marked and blemished the ominous looking armor, making Cody seem more of a nightmare coming to real life.

Rex would never mistake his brother for someone else, even in this startling and bone nerving attire. No one else knew Rex as well as Cody did. Dark eyes narrowed into slits as Cody glowered at them and a sinister; snake like grin slowly crept up his chapped lips.

"So this is where you have been hiding all this time? And keeping in grotty company I see," Cody sneered. "Rex, I really thought better of you."

Rex let out a low grumble and took a step forward, but Ahsoka put a restraining hand against his chest as Cody raised his blaster eye level with Rex.

"How did you find us Cody?" Rex demanded.

"I have to admit it wasn't easy, you did a remarkable job covering your tracks, but you must know that hiding with a Jedi you'd eventually get caught," Cody gaffed.

The words struck a blade through Ahsoka. It was true she was hoping that it would be later, so much later with Rex safe.

"She," Cody waved his blaster at Ahsoka, "was only listed as missing as were you. Rex, my brother, loyal servant to the GAR, how could you? How could you desert and leave your men for _her_?"

"I am more than a servant Cody as are you. I did not desert my men, my men turned their backs on what they were sworn to fight for. How can you justify yourself _brother_," Rexspat, "killing those who we were born to protect? Tell me Cody, did you do it?Did you kill General Kenobi?"

"Shut up," Cody roared.

_Please __say __you __didn__'__t,_ Ahsoka pleaded. She wanted to run, shout do something to break this apart but she was frozen in place. She couldn't even get her mouth to work properly let alone the Force. _I __fought __in __countless __battles, __faced __death __without __a __second __glance __and __now __I __can__'__t __even __help __the __one __I __love. __I __deserve __to __die._

"How did it make you feel Cody, did you feel like you did the galaxy justice by ridding of one Jedi?" Rex continued.

"Shut your mouth traitor!" Cody gripped his blaster with two hands but it began to shake.

"I am not the traitor Cody and neither are you." Rex's voice suddenly took on a hush, gentler but cautious tone. "Did she escape?" Ahsoka furrowed her brows in bewilderment. Who escape?

"I don't know who you're talking about," snarled Cody, but as the words rushed from his mouth, Ahsoka could see that the Commander knew who Rex was referring to. "Now turn around and head to that ship of yours. There's a bounty I'm going to collect on both of you and have the satisfaction of watching the pain wash across your face…brother."

"The Empire paying clones now?" Rex taunted.

"Rex what are you doing?" Ahsoka muttered.

"If you want to play it hard, I'll just drag your corpses back, but I really don't want to cause a scene," Cody nonchalantly shrugged his shoulders. "You're choice."

"You're not with the Empire are you?" Ahsoka finally spoke.

Cody glared lasers at the girl. "I won't speak to such trash. Now move!"

Ahsoka was almost tempted to let down her barriers and use the Force on Cody, but if he had found them then anyone could be around. _He _could be near and she couldn't face him.

They began to walk, Cody behind with his blasters at their backs. "It pains me to see you like this Rex it really does. We could have shaped up those di'kuts in the Imperial garrison in no time."

"I wouldn't touch them with a ten foot pole," Rex jibed.

"That's what I said too," Cody softly admitted.

"Tell me Cody, what led you to becoming a mercenary?" Rex prodded. As long as he kept his former friend busy talking it more time for them to come up with a plan of escape.

"None of your business that' show," Cody hit Rex with the butt of his blaster on the back of his head. Rex fumbled, almost stumbling to the ground and Ahsoka caught him. She lightly touched the spot and her fingers came back with a small spot of blood. She turned her attention to Cody with a seething look.

"Enough of this," She growled, her patience had grown thin. She would not see the man she loved fall into the hands of the enemy. Not now, not ever and that meant opening herself up to the one thing she fought so hard to bury. _He__'__s __worth __more __than __my __fear._

Cody raised a skeptical brow. "Oh yeah?" She could hear the blaster power up but before he could pull the trigger Ahsoka swung her hand back and then thrust it forward at Cody's chest, propelling the commander with enough force against the nearest wall his body actually left an imprint on the building. As Cody slumped unconsciously to the ground Ahsoka assisted in helping Rex stand back up. Rex touched the back of his sore head and winced and then glared down at Cody.

"Ahsoka, you-the Force you used the Force in the open," troubled and concern for the safety of the girl, Rex was both a bit distraught but happy that she was able to find the will and strength to use her gift.

"I know," she murmured. "I just couldn't let him do this to you."

"But what of the Jedi hunter's finding you?" He asked worriedly, knowing how fearful she was about opening herself to the Force.

"You are worth more to me than the Jedi hunters," Rex was about to protest when Ahsoka placed a finger over his lips. "Later. Please. For now, let's just say it's a step in the right direction okay?"

Huffing out an exasperated breath, Rex nodded. "Okay." He then looked down disappointedly at Cody. "We can't leave him like that," pursed his lips together indismay, knowing she wasn't going to like what he was about to say. "We have to take him with us."

"What?" Ahsoka almost shrieked.

Rex turned his head and looked at the Jedi. "If he wanted us dead, Cody would have done it. Ahsoka, you found redemption in me when I held that blaster to you. Cody is my brother and he needs our help."

Ahsoka took in a few deep calming breaths and looked from Rex to Cody. "What if he is beyond redemption?"

"Then I will take care of him when the time comes," somber and definitive was Rex's reply.

Out of precaution incase Cody decided to wake up before they got to the ship, Ahsoka and Rex took some of her veil material and used it as a blindfold and temporary binds around his wrist and feet. Rex hated to see and manhandle his friend in such a way, but it was for the best because he hated to think about the alternate.

Ahsoka had rushed back to their speeder that was still parked outside of the cantina so that hopefully they could avoid any other local entanglement. It would look quite suspicious with Rex having Cody slung over his shoulder, bind and blindfolded. _Hurry __Ash__'__ika,_Rex impatiently waited for the Jedi to return with their speeder.

Moments later the familiar whine of the machine approached and parked next to Rex. He was about to haul Cody over his shoulder when Ahsoka halted him. Her eyes fluttered closed, raised her elegant hand and Cody's hulky body levitated off the hard ground and into the speeder effortlessly.

"Saves you some heavy lifting," Ahsoka vaguely smiled. She threw a blanket over Cody to cover him up and keep prying eyes off their extra cargo.

"Come on kid." Rex shook his head as they hopped into the speeder. "We need to inform Cut and Suu about Cody and the possibility that there may be more scouts on planet."

* * *

><p>"Thank you Ahsoka," the static reply of Cut's voice said. "We'll be on the lookout. Good luck to all of you."<p>

"Tell Suu and the kids we'll miss them and see them soon," though Ahsoka didn't know if that was a true statement or not.

She closed her communicator, leaned back into her seat and closed her eyes, letting the wind wash over her face and the Force pulse through her. It was such a strange sensation after blocking it for so long. She could feel Rex's apprehension and excitement, though contained. She lightly reached out to Cody; only feeling icy cold hatred toward humanity. Ahsoka quickly retracted from him and focused on the road in front of her.

* * *

><p>"Wait, what is this? You can't bring him!" Thea contested as Rex set Cody's lifeless body down on a pallet and Ahsoka put their duffels down and across from Cody.<p>

"Start the ship," Rex dared her to challenge him.

"No," Thea raised her chin defiantly. "It was only supposed to be you two."

"Thea," Ahsoka placed a hand on the small pilot's shoulder. Now that she had opened herself up a little to the Force, she could feel the fear, anger, hurt and grief built within this woman. Composing herself Ahsoka continued, "Please, we need your help."

"But isn't he an Imperial Trooper?" Thea's voice shook.

"I don't think so," Ahsoka said uncertainly. "I think he's a man who severely lost his way."

"Then why do you have him all tied up?"

"For the safety of all of us," Rex answered. "A lost clone is still a dangerous clone."

Thea shrugged off Ahsoka's hand and sauntered over to Rex, poking him in the chest with her finger, "Just remember this is my ship _Captain_and if I feel the need to dump you off in space don't think I won't."

"I wouldn't think otherwise," Rex said calmly and lowered her hand from his chest.

"One other thing," her voice had gone faint and Rex was thankful for his superior hearing, "I want to know how he died."

"Thea, I don't think I'm the right person to tell you, but I promise you if you don't blow my can out of the hull first," Thea gave a short snort, "you will find answers to your questions there."

They stared at each other for a few tense moments and until Thea uttered, "Okay. Where are we exactly headed?"

"Mandalore, specifically a place called Kyrimorut. Here are the coordinates." Rex reached into one of his many pockets and pulled out a small data pad, handing over to Thea. Without another word she turned on her heals and headed to the cockpit.

Undoing what was left of her veil; Ahsoka let the material drop to the Dura-steal floor and slowly lowered herself to a crouching position next to the unconscious trooper, resting two fingers against his temple and closed her eyes. Rex watched with interest and after a few minutes her sparkly blue orbs fluttered open, his own had question for her.

"I'm checking to make sure no permanent damage was done to him. He hit that building must harder than I had intended," Ahsoka explained.

Rex slowly nodded his head. "Is he going to be okay?"

"I'm no healer, but he should be. He'll have a nasty couple of bumps, bruises and a heck of headache much deserved mind you, but he should be fine." Ahsoka left Cody's side and joined Rex on the cool bench the small ship had to offer as seating.

"What did you mean when you asked Cody did she make it?" Ahsoka rubbed her tired eyes and then propped her chin on the palm of her hand.

_She __never __knew __then,_ Rex had thought the Jedi were tight knit especially the young girls, _but __even __closes __of __friends __can __hold __secrets._ _As __we __both __know. _Rex bit the bottom of his lip and regarded his comrade. "Soka' wearen't the only ones who had a relationship."

"I wasn't blind to all relationships among clone troopers Rex," uttered Ahsoka.

Rex raised a brow at her. "So you were aware of Barriss Offee andCody's relationship?" Rex already knew the answer to his question before he asked, but at the young woman's silence and piercing stare it only confirmed tha tshe had no idea.

"Did he love her?" She tried to swallow the lump that threatened to choke her.

"Very much so," Rex was clearly uncomfortable talking about another man's relationship, but he knew it was important to Ahsoka for her to know at least Barriss meant something to Cody and not just a traitor in the end.

"Do you think he killed her?" Her voice subdued.

"I don't know, but we will find out. When he wakens, we'll find out more than we ever wanted to know."


	3. Chapter 3

"We've entered hyper-space. It should only be a couple hours if we don't run into any entanglements," Thea announced, voice hazed with static coming from the old speaker box above Rex and Ahsoka's heads.

"Having blinders on, sometimes I forget that the Jedi and the troops weren't the only ones affected by the war and new turnover. How becoming of a potential Jedi," Ahsoka sarcastically spat. "Thea, she must have really loved Echo. I didn't know Echo all that well, but he seemed like a reserved soldier."

"He was a good man. By the book until he saw that even the book needed some editing. Loyal, honorable and dependable," Rex reflected back on Echo. He remembered the day when he and Cody promoted Fives and Echo to ARC's. The surprise when the sense of honor rested on their shoulders, they walked a bit prouder that day without it letting get to their heads. Rex always figured Echo kept Fives a bit grounded. "It was hard losing him."

"She's in a lot of pain," said Ahsoka, referring to Thea.

"We all are," Rex looked over at his brother who grimaced in his sleep. Cody started to shift and a groan emitted from his blistered lips. Rex slid over to Cody's side, careful not to jar the commander who was still blindfolded and tied at the hands. Even if Cody was hurting, he would wake with a struggle and in a panic; though Rex was pretty sure even hearing his voice wasn't going to help things much. Rex motioned for Ahsoka to stay back especially with the last reaction Cody had to her, he did not want a repeat.

"Cody?" Rex cautiously called. The commander made an unintelligible noise and Rex said again, "Cody can you hear me?"

"Gah! My head," Cody went to reach for his head, but his bind hands restricted the movement and he froze muscles taut. "Where am I? Who's there?"

"Cody…" Rex started slowly, but Cody interrupted.

"I knew you couldn't be trusted," his voice a vile whisper.

Rex took a moment to compose himself he would not let Cody get to him. He was going to help his damaged brother; it was just going to take time and patience. "We are going to a safe place, I promise you."

"How does it make you feel Rex," Cody seethed, "seeing me like this? Knowing that I was about to turn you and your precious girlfriend in for a couple of lousy credits, must make you feel like a big man?"

What had happened to his friend, his comrade for Cody to turn so cynical, violent and angry? "No Cody, but it's for your safety that you remain like that."

"My safety! My safety, when in the nine hells did you ever care about my safety!" Cody roared and began to struggle against his binds. "All you ever cared about was that Jedi twerp!"

Rex stepped back next to Ahsoka as he watched with tormented eyes as Cody retched and writhed trying to free himself, only succeeding in falling to the ground with a loud thump. With the all the noise it brought Thea from the cockpit.

"What is going on?" She demanded and was silenced as she saw the winded trooper on the floor of her ship. "What is he doing?"

Cody lifted his head slightly and bared his teeth. "I felt like a roll on the floor was appropriate, what does it look like I'm doing!"

"Calm down," Rex mildly commanded.

"You calm down!" Cody snarled and pulled on his binds again. His body suddenly froze mid pull and attention from Thea and Rex were drawn to Ahsoka. Her gaze was concentrated on Cody's, forcing him in place. "She's here isn't she? She's forcing me not to move!"

"She can also force your mouth shut if you don't hear me out," Rex squatted next to his blinded brother. "Listen to me Cody," Rex's voice low, no-nonsense and finally Cody shut his mouth. "I don't know what happened to you, but this isn't the man, the brother I remember. You are a good honorable man and I know somewhere it that thick skull of yours you know that as well. You are neither a mercenary nor a product of the GAR or the Empire. You were a man loved by someone and are seeking vengeance for both of your losses."

"Shut it Rex, you have no idea," Cody's voice was strained.

"But I do brother. Ahsoka is going to release you as long as you don't do anything stupid and then we have a lot to talk about."

"I have nothing to say to you or _her!_" Cody rasped out.

Rex sighed and looked over his shoulder at Ahsoka and Thea. Thea had a mix look of sorrow, anger and loss. "Release him," Rex said. Cody's body instantly relaxed against the floor.

Thea stepped around Ahsoka and kneeled next to Rex. She reached out and gently brushed back the hair that had fallen into Cody's face that would be in his eyes except the blindfold covered them. A vein throbbed at the corner of Cody's temple and she caressed her fingertip over it, causing a violent tremble throughout his body.

"I share your pain solider," her warm breath stroked his ear; Cody craned his neck to get a sense of the new intruder. Before he could say anything, Thea quickly got up and walked back to the cockpit without a glance back.

Cody lay prone on the floor until he gave a big sigh and said, "Can you at least help me off the floor and sit up?" With the help of both Rex and Ahsoka, they had him back on the pallet sitting against the bulkhead. "Who was that?" Cody nodded in the wrong direction, but he was implying to Thea.

"That was Thea, our pilot," Ahsoka answered. "Commander Cody, you're not the only one who lost someone and is hurting."

"You don't know anything about me _girl,_" Cody rumbled. "And the Jedi deserved what they got."

"Do you really believe that Cody? Do you really believe Barriss was a traitor?" Rex asked.

"Don't talk to me about her!" Cody thundered; the rage and anguish radiating from him made Ahsoka gasp. Rex shot her a concerned glance, but she waved him off.

"What happened brother to make you so hateful? What happened to her?"

"You're not my brother," Cody panted. Familiar words once spoken by Fives to Rex and it took time, learning and growing up from Fives to realize his mistake. For Cody, hopefully trust, time and healing would help him. Suddenly his shoulders slumped as if he had given up or passed out.

"Cody?" Rex called to him.

"Why didn't you stay Rex? How could a loyal trooper like you abandon us so easily? How could you forget who you are?" Cody was almost sorrowful and took on a slight pathetic tone.

_Who am I? _Rex felt the chill right down to his bones as the question haunted him. "Did you get to see her before the order?" he asked carefully.

"Did you kill your general, Rex?" Cody shot back.

Ahsoka stiffened as did Rex. "I didn't have to," he answered darkly. Cody sat there grinding his teeth. "Did you kill General Kenobi?"

_Please say no,_ but Ahsoka's stomach sank when Cody gave a sharp nod. "Yes. Some of us are a bit more duty bound than others."

"You aren't with the Empire are you Cody? Her death pushed you over the edge didn't it? You do know why I left and you would have too if she was there with you, wouldn't you?" Rex pushed.

A low growl emanated from the back of the commander's throat. "No, you're wrong."

"You're lying," Ahsoka softly said. "I know your hatred runs strong for me but please, Barriss was my friend. I must know if you really cared for her." Cody sat up tall and rolled his shoulders back, chin up high and mouth clamped shut. Disgusted and discouraged, Ahsoka bit her lip to prevent the bitter and angry words escaping from her mouth. She didn't want to give Cody the satisfaction of knowing he had hurt her. "Another time then Commander," Ahsoka dismissed herself and walked toward the cockpit to join Thea.

* * *

><p>Thea heard the door swoosh open and then close, but paid no mind to the scuffle footsteps as they approached closer to her. Her attention was captivated by the streaks of light as her ship traveled through the vast galaxy. Thea tried to keep her mind a blank, but it continued to be drawn to the tormented soldier in her ship's bay and on the man she so wish she could forget.<p>

"Mind if I sit?" Ahsoka asked.

Thea looked at the Jedi and gestured for her to take the other seat. "You're much younger that I thought," Thea eyed Ahsoka.

"I feel older than I look," Ahsoka was exhausted. She felt it in her bones, as she slowly lowered herself to the chair and as her body silently thanked her for finally taking a rest. "Guess you have to mature quickly these days in order to survive. When the Order was around, they didn't care too much for immaturity."

"So you are a Jedi then?"

Ahsoka shrugged her shoulders, "As much as I'll ever be. My master," Ahsoka closed her eyes as she mentioned Anakin Skywalker.

"You don't have to talk about it if you don't want to," Thea consoled.

"No, it's okay," though for the girl it was far from okay. "My master taught me well, but we never had a chance to finish."

The air was thick and heavy as both reflected on that night and how they were affected. "I'm sorry he didn't make it," Thea gently placed her hand on top of Ahsoka's and gave it a squeeze for comfort.

_In so many words he didn't make it._ Ahsoka gave a small sad smile and then sat back into the seat. "Me too."

"I didn't know that Jedi could have relationships. Then again I never thought I'd see the day that GAR troops would turn against their leaders, teachers and friends too," Thea's gentleness disappeared and a harsh, critical eye focused at Ahsoka.

"The Jedi were taught that relationships would be too much of an emotional and passionate distraction. It would influence our decision for life and death."

"That's a little cold don't you think?" Thea asked skeptically.

Ahsoka slightly shrugged her shoulders. "I understand what the Masters were saying, to sacrifice the one for the many. If you let your emotions, your love for that person get in the way how do you justify killing the many? But on the other hand, if you aren't allowed to share your passions with the one you love then other outlets are found." Ahsoka thought back to her master's relationship to the senator. They hid their love from everyone until it back fired on the Jedi. If he and Padme were to be together without the criticism and judgment, would things have turned out differently? If the masters had been a little more open minded to the idea of relationships, love, attachment for the greater good, would they still be in the temple? Love wasn't a selfish act so what was so wrong with it?

She and Rex would always have to be in secret; there would be no way the GAR would allow a clone to have a normal life. They could never allow such ideas run through their minds.

"What about you Thea?"

"What about me?" Thea slipped a data pad into her lap and tried to look disinterested in their conversation now that the attention had been drawn onto her.

"Rex told me that you and Echo were involved," Ahsoka went on.

Thea didn't look up from the pad, but her frown deepened, causing the long, jagged scar to exaggerate even more and darken across her face. "Depends on what you mean involved. I knew the man, we talked and shared stories. Because he was a soldier and me a pilot, we didn't get to see each other much. End of story."

But it wasn't the end of the story and Ahsoka opened, closed, opened and then closed her mouth again in an attempt to find the right words for her question. She reached out with the Force and much like Cody; she found cold hate and a steal barrier.

"Jedi, you won't find what you're looking for in here," Thea tapped the side of her head. Ahsoka stared incredulously at the woman in front of her.

"How do you know that's what I searching for?" the young Jedi asked astonishingly.

"Isn't that what Jedi do, read minds? Besides, you aren't denying it, are you?" Thea peeked her eyes over the data pad at Ahsoka. "What is it that you seek little Jedi?"

"I need answers. I want to know why I am sitting in this very spot instead of meeting my maker like most if not all the Jedi did, the reason Rex didn't pull the trigger on me, why Barriss would keep her and Cody a secret from me and," Ahsoka took the data pad from Thea's hands, placing it on the consul. Thea continued to stare at her hands, not meeting Ahsoka's face. The girl leaned forward and said faintly, "Why would you want to forget someone like Echo?"

Thea hands froze in midair as if she were still holding the data pad and held her breath until her face started to turn red. Ahsoka for a moment thought the woman was going to pass out until she let out a breath and cast despondent eyes upon her. "I don't have the answers for you Ahsoka. I'm sorry."

"I don't understand!" Ahsoka was confused and left feeling disheartened. "As a civilian you have a unique perspective on life, love and loss. I know I'm being a bit harsh, but how can you say you don't have any answers when you and Echo left such a big impact on others?"

"Ahsoka, I'm tired; I really don't want to talk about this, about him anymore," Thea tersely breathed out.

They once again sat in tense silence, only the hum of the engines and quiet beeps of the controls filling the cockpit. Ahsoka scraped her finger on the arm chair, pulling some of the loose material off and flicked it to the ground.

"You can't always run away as I am learning," Ahsoka gently mumbled, "It catches up to you quickly no matter how good of a hiding place you find."

"So I am finding out," Thea whispered back.

* * *

><p>Resting his head back against the hard metal of the wall of the ship, Rex had closed his eyes only to quickly open them as Cody shifted in his seat. His gaze fell upon the ebony armor, a drastic contrast to the commander's distinct orange and white colors that of the 212th Attack Battalion. As he first noticed when Cody first approached them the armor was bulky probably made of a heavier plastiod and fitted for the larger Alpha-class ARC clones. Glancing one more time at him, Rex turned his attention to the blasters he had relieved the commander of. Both were unfamiliar to Rex, but it did not stop the fascination nor the rush of adrenaline when handling such powerful tools. The smaller of the two blasters looked to be like an every man's gun, quick to draw and a killer on short range shots.<p>

Rex set the gun aside and picked up the metallic black cannon looking blaster. It had death written on its side. It wasn't as heavy as it looked, made of a light weight alloy and as Rex pressed it against his shoulder, lining it up for a shot, he could see why troopers liked this gun. It had an inferred scope and precise line of sight setting. Quick, deadly and accurate. The ex-clone captain could practically hear this blaster sing to him, like a siren tempting him into doom. The soft whine of the blaster only lured him deeper into its clutches. Rex's finger held steady on the trigger as he pointed the blaster at his target. _One shot, _it caressed, _one shot and you don't have to worry about him anymore. Do it Captain… _

"It's a DC-19 Stealth Carbine," Cody's coarse voice brought Rex out of his hypnoses and he quickly placed the blaster back down on the bench. "Beautiful gun isn't Rex? I bet you've never seen anything like it before. It only get about 10-15 shots, but you can't see or hear them and it's great for sneaking up on your prey or tied up troopers."

"I wasn't going to shoot you Cody," Rex calmly said, he wasn't going to be bated by the trooper.

"Awe, don't lie Rex. I could always tell when you were lying to me," Cody bitterly retorted.

"What were you doing out here Cody? Are you a sniper for the Empire now? A Jedi hunter? A clone killer? What are you?" Rex demanded.

Cody made a tisk tisk sound and shook his blindfolded head. "So many questions Rex, but I think I'm the one who should be asking, what are you doing out here and with that Jedi traitor? Wait, don't answer that, I know what you were doing with her…" Cody grimaced.

Rex gritted his teeth together until his jaw started to hurt. _I'm not going to have any teeth if I keep doing that._

Relaxing his jaw, he decided he had to try from another direction. Some clone troopers were taught the ways of interrogation, Rex being one of them and he was going to have to go to a place where it was really going to hurt his brother. He would have to break Cody down and find his weakest spot. Rex would have to numb himself from the torment and pain he was about to cause, not necessarily physically but mentally.

His hands firmly grasped the butt of the DC-19 carbine and it melded into his hand as if it were made for him. Rex caressed the blaster with his amber eyes before moving over to sit next to Cody. Cody could feel the shift of the bench and tensed as a heavy presence loomed over him.

"Do it Rex, you know you want to. You know what I'll do you to your Jedi if I am free. End my misery," Cody mocked.

Rex instead pressed the blaster under Cody's jaw hard enough to hear the man's teeth clank together and in a low, unsympathetic voice, "Is this how you did it _Commander_?"

"Do what _Captain_?" Cody swallowed.

"You know what I'm talking about Cody," Rex seethed. A fire began to ignite within as he dug the blaster harder into Cody's skin. Anger fumed that his brother could be so heartless, that he could just turn his back on the Jedi and that his sense of individuality flew out the window.

"Or maybe you took her out here," Rex moved the blaster to Cody's temple. "Did she cry Cody? Did she beg for your mercy?" A low growl emanated from the back of Cody's throat. "Did her blue eyes dull when she found out that her protector turned out to be her nightmare?"

"Rex…" Cody snapped heatedly.

"Or," Rex dragged the blaster across Cody's skin leaving an angry red trail until he was centered on the commander's forehead. Rex took out a pocket knife from one of his belt pouches pressed the sharp, cool edge against the sensitive skin next to Cody's eye. He could see the man take another gulp as his adam's apple bobbed and beads of sweat started to form at his hair line. In one swift movement Rex sliced the blindfold off and Cody blinked as the light hit his sensitive eyes. Once his eyes adjusted to the light Cody found Rex only a breath away staring vehemently at him with the blaster still held to his head.

"Maybe you're just a soulless bastard and took her life without a second thought," Rex hauntingly whispered. "Did she give up or did you have to fight her?"

Cody's eyes were set ablaze, but his mouth was clench tightly shut. "Tell me Cody, did you even do it or did you have your subordinates do it for you? Maybe you were too much of a coward and couldn't face her and hear her ask why. Think about what they could have done to her, what they probably did to her before killing her."

"Stop Rex," Cody warned.

"Even with her powers she couldn't have stopped all of them. But if you were there would you have told them to stop? She is after all a traitor. What if she was calling for you, moaning, whimpering your name?" Rex hated himself and would have to drink himself stupid or wash himself clean. It made him sick to talk about the girl in such a way and to think the troops were capable of such a vile act.

"Did you witness it Cody? Did she cry for you as they ravaged her? Did you at least bring any compassion to her with death? Or did you let your minions carry out your cowardice?"

Cody's breathing had become labored and Rex could hear the man grinding his teeth together. "You have no idea what happened," barely contained incensed rage spilled from every pore out of the commander. "You could never know Rex; your Jedi is still with you."

"Did you feel better knowing that one more Jedi was gone, did you feel like that loyal subject Cody?" Rex yelled as he slammed Cody's head back against the hull of the ship with the blaster, "as the smoldering hole blemished her unmarred beauty and knowing that she'd never be able to say I love you anymore?"

A primal roar erupted from Cody's mouth startling Rex and Cody using all of his upper body strength, slammed into Rex making them both tumble to the ground.

Rex scrambled for the carbine blaster and quickly got back up onto his legs, blaster pointed at Cody's head. Cody lay prone on the floor, panting for a breath with his hands still bound behind his back.

"Damn you Rex, damn you," he fiercely whispered.

Rex also heaving from adrenaline, continued to point the baster at Cody ready for his next attempt on him. His armor clicked and clanked as Cody slowly pushed himself onto his knees, head looking defeated down at the ground. Rex realized that some of Cody's resolve had broken.

"What happened to her, to you Cody?" Rex lowered the blaster, the fight over for now.

"You should kill me Rex, I don't deserve to live," Cody moaned under his breath.

"We'll determine that later, tell me now what happened?"

"You were right, all along you were right. I am the coward. Damn you!" Cody began to shout. "Are you happy now? I am a nothing but a scum sucking, low-life on the run mercenary! Are you happy you di'kut! I'm no better than you or those who have deserted. I am…I am," Cody gulped for a breath and twisted his face in a search to find the right words. "Nothing. I mean nothing. I belong to no one and have nowhere to turn to."

Rex kneeled on one knee and placed his hands on either side of Cody's plated shoulders. "We're friends Cody always have been and always will be. Most importantly you are my brother and brothers don't turn each other away."

Cody tentatively raised his head at Rex; the fire in his eyes now burned out and was replaced with a shadowy trepidation. "I don't know how to be your friend and your brother."

"Then you'll just have to relearn won't you."


	4. Chapter 4

_Here is the next chapter! I am thrilled that you all are enjoying the story so far! You're positive feedback makes it all worthwhile! _

* * *

><p>"How long were you with the GAR?" Ahsoka had enough of the silence and needed to talk, about anything.<p>

"I wasn't really with the GAR. I flew for the Republic before the clones were even created, before the war broke out," Thea coolly answered. "I flew various cargo, senators, representatives; even Jedi. Lots of Jedi after the war broke out. I became really good at getting my crew where they needed as close as possible without getting shot down. When they established the GAR the need for outside pilots were no longer wanted and told all of us to leave, but I volunteered my services anyway."

"Why?" Ahsoka asked curiously.

Thea cocked her head at the Jedi, some of her red tresses falling over her shoulder. "Why not? I was good at my job and I wanted to make sure the men that were fighting for my life, your life, for peace and freedom would have at least a safe journey in and maybe a safe journey out of their battles."

"That's very noble of you," Ahsoka thoughtfully said and stretched in her seat, some of her joints popping in protest.

Thea shrugged her shoulders, "I guess."

"Did you fly with Echo? Is that how you two met?" The girl prudently inquired.

"We'll be entering the Mando atmosphere within fifteen minutes and should make landing at Kyrimorut not long after," Thea rushed out and avoided answering Ahsoka. "Do you want to let the captain know that we will be approaching the destination shortly?" Thea had been completely unaware that she had addressed Rex in such a formal manner as Ahsoka paused before getting out of her seat. Feeling the other woman's stare, Thea looked out of the corner of her eye and asked curtly, "What?"

"Nothing," the young Jedi answered just as briefly as she slipped from her seat and made her way toward the exit.

"Ahsoka," Thea called to the girl. Ahsoka stopped before exiting the cockpit, but did not turn away from the door. "I still love him. That's why I can't talk about it."

"Maybe that's why you need to talk about him," with that, Ahsoka exited the cockpit to leave Thea with her emotions she fought so long to squash, screaming for a release.

* * *

><p>"Rex, we'll be entering the…" Ahsoka announced and stopped abruptly as she felt the commander's abhorrent energy crashing violently just as the waves on Kamino had when showing their fury in one of their infamous storms. The Jedi looked at Cody for a good long moment noticing that he was no longer wearing the blindfold, but his hands were still bound behind his back. His head was cast downward and he was hunched slightly forward, as much as the armor allowed and together the picture displayed a man who had just met defeat. With the Force though, Ahsoka was given another depiction of Cody; self-loathing, animosity for those around him and emptiness without a clue of how to fill it.<p>

_Is __this __why __the __Masters __wanted __us __to __stay __away __from __attachment? __Is __attachment __the __darkside?_ Ahsoka shuttered at the thought and shut herself away from Cody's despair.

"We'll be at Kyrimorut probably within the next half hour," Ahsoka sat down next to Rex and tangled her slim fingers into his strong ones. She felt him squeeze her hand tightly and gazed at his tense face who had not taken his eyes off Cody. "What's you game plan?"

Rex shifted in his seat and a small breath escaped from his lips. "I need to comm Fives to let him know that we will be approaching shortly and also inform him about our additional passenger."

"You wouldn't have an additional passenger if you just did what I asked you," an antagonistic, hoarse murmur made Ahsoka and Rex turn and look at Cody. "Fives is also a deserter? I should have known with his out of the box ways," Cody spat. His head still downcast, it didn't hide his hostility toward any of them.

"Get it out of your head right now Cody," Rex ordered no-nonsense, "no one is going to kill you and you will not kill anyone."

"We'll see," Cody fumed.

Rex's grip tightened on Ahsoka's until she thought it might actually break. She did not want to complain, but she did not want a broken hand. When she could not tolerate it any long and was about to protest, the pressure on her hand suddenly released and Rex jumped up from his seat, glaring down at the cause of his anger. Cody lifted his head, eyes rolled up at the ex-captain.

"Tell Fives I said hi and see him soon," Cody grinned.

* * *

><p>Rex was not comfortable leaving Ahsoka alone with Cody, but he was still bound and she had her blasters and the Force to help her. Not to mention Rex with his superior hearing would be able to hear if something was going on back there. It still did not ease his nerves.<p>

As he entered the cockpit, he saw Thea turn a little in her seat to see who was entering and slightly nodded to him. "Captain," she acknowledged.

As Rex sat down in the co-pilot's seat he said distantly, "I haven't been a captain for over a year and a half, Thea. That's not who I am anymore."

"Sorry," she briskly apologized. Thea tried to tune Rex out as he used her communicator and commed his contact.

"Fives?" Rex asked a little brighter than he had been feeling.

_Fives, __Fives! _Thea's mind raced with the name. He was with Echo at the time he had died. He was the one to deliver the devastating news of his death to her. He was the one who had changed her world forever. Thea felt like she could throw up right about now. _Numb, __all __you __feel __is __numbness__…_

Rex may have not been able to see his brother, but he could hear the smile in his voice. "Rex! Good to hear you, when are going to be here?"

"In about thirty minutes, listen Fives…" Rex trailed off.

Fives voice instantly turned serious. "What is it Rex? Is it Ahsoka?"

"We had a bit of an entanglement with a former comrade," Rex described delicately. "It's Cody, Fives and he's aboard the ship with us." There was a long pause before Fives spoke again.

"Is he dead?"

"No," Rex rushed to answer.

"Then why did you bring him Rex?" Fives voice was emotionless.

"For the same reason you and I left."

"He could be a spy for the Empire," Fives pressed. Rex understood Fives reasoning to be weary. He had a wife, a child on the way, a haven to keep safe, but wasn't this haven supposed to be open to those who sought it?

"I can promise you he's not Fives, but he is different and needs our help." He could hear Fives sigh on the other side of the comm.

"I understand and will let the others know. I'll see you when you get here."

"Thank you Fives." Rex logged off and sat back in the chair.

"What's so special about this clone that you didn't you kill him Cap…I mean sir?" Thea aloofly asked.

"You don't have to call me sir Thea. I didn't kill him because he's my brother and needs my help. He always had my back and was one of my most trusted friends. Cody, if he had truly wanted Ahsoka and me dead would have done it before we reached the ship."

"What if he doesn't want your help?" She continued to work on the landing procedures without looking at Rex while asking her questions.

"What makes you believe he doesn't?" Rex folded his arms over his chest and regarded the small pilot skeptically.

"What makes you think he does?" Thea jerked her head up and flashed her dark coal-colored eyes at Rex. Her hair fluttered over her shoulders contrasting drastically with her pale skin, making it look like her head was on fire and enhancing her searing temperament.

"Cody was my best friend…" Rex started to defend.

"Was your best friend, was your brother. All in the past. What about in the now?"

"The man I knew, I know is still in there."

"Are you sure? How can you see that when you don't even know who you are _Rex?_ You tell me not to call you captain or sir, so who are you? How do you expect to help a man so immersed in anguish when you have no identity of yourself?" Cold-blooded is how Rex would describe the woman sitting across from him, but that was the nicest thing that he would dare to say out loud.

"At least I care enough to help," Rex retorted lowly. "You have no idea who I am, what I have been through and am going through."

"No? You don't think I do? I'm glad to know how little you think of heartache and loss." Thea deliberately said slowly and turned away from Rex.

_Loss__…__Echo, __of __course._"You blame me for Echo don't you?" Rex asked softly.

"Echo was a soldier, a clone soldier and died in the line of duty." Thea snapped.

"So you're just going to let what you had with him, die with him? You lady, are a hard, bitter shell."

"That's right; I am a hard bitter shell, but at least I know who I am _Captain.__"_

_Who __am __I?_Those three words taunted him. "Didn't I say no questions asked?" Rex order stormily.

"My apologies _sir,_ it won't happen again," Thea retorted sarcastically.

"Just land the damn ship," Rex mumbled.

* * *

><p>"Cody," Ahsoka called to the resting clone. She remained on the opposite side of the ship while Cody still sat now with his back resting on the wall with his eyes closed. At the sound of the Jedi's voice he craned one eye opened. "Did you see Barriss before the Order?" His other eye now open, Cody blinked blankly at Ahsoka. "Would you have left with her?" Again, Cody just blinked blankly and remained silent. "Rex thinks there's hope for you. As a Jedi, I suppose I should too. As a civilian, I think you're a lost cause."<p>

"That's honest of you," Cody said reservedly.

"That's the Jedi in me," Ahsoka sardonically shot back.

"What if I am a spy for the Empire, will you shoot me Ahsoka?" Cody asked oddly.

"If it means keeping Rex and my friends safe, I will. But I don't think you are a spy," she answered cautiously.

"Oh? What do you think I am?"

"A victim who has been forced to do ungodly acts against humanity; is now suffering the consequences for those who were too weak and afraid to do it themselves. Maybe you sought us out for a reason, Cody."

"I thought you said I was a lost cause," Cody gave a caustic snarl, but looked to be a little more contemplative than he was a few minutes ago.

"Maybe you are," Ahsoka said causally as kicked her legs back and forth while she sat on the bench. "Many of times I thought I was a lost cause as well and Rex pulled me back from my own self loathing."

"You should have self loathing, you are a Jedi," Cody insulted.

"And you loved a Jedi at one time and perhaps somewhere in that dark heart of yours you still do." Cody opened his mouth to protest, but Ahsoka beat him to it. "We've already taken the first step Cody. You said you weren't going to talk to me because I am a Jedi, and we are."

"Look where we are," Cody muttered. He bit the bottom of his lip in thought. "I am not a good man, General," Cody admitted.

"Then it's time to redeem yourself Commander. It's time for all of us to heal."

* * *

><p>"We were just having a nice chat before you came in here Rex," Cody smirked as Rex returned from the cockpit and began to gather his and Ahsoka's belongings. He strapped the stealth carbine to his belt and had the smaller blaster holstered for easy accessibility in case of any trouble, mainly from Cody.<p>

Rex cast Ahsoka a quick worried glance as he helped hold her duffle up as she swung her arms through the straps. "It's okay Rex," the young Jedi assured.

"Yes, dear Captain, you're Jedi hasn't lost her sense of honesty at all. It's very helpful," Cody went on to gibe. "I think I will become a better man for it."

"I would hope so," Rex grabbed Cody by his tied hands and hauled him to his feet.

"Did you tell Fives I was excited to see him?" Cody twisted his head around to jeer at Rex. _We __have __a __long __way __to __go_ Rex thought mournfully to himself.

"You have less than thrilled Null troopers, Mandalorian warriors and a pissed off ARC trooper all waiting for you. I would say no, Fives is not excited to see you," Rex pushed Cody forward toward the landing ramp and they waited until Thea set the ship down and the ramp lowered. "This is your only chance Cody. Fives once respected you not only as a grand soldier of the GAR, but as a friend as well. Be that man we all once knew and looked up to."

"Such sweet talk, I think I'm falling in love again," Cody scoffed.

"If not for your friends, do it for Barriss," Rex faintly rumbled into Cody's ear. Cody instantly sobered up and any vicious retorts and contemptuous humor disappeared. His face became blank, unable to read and his jaw tightened in tension. The only display of emotion was the distrust pooling in his russet eyes.

Rex, Ahsoka and Cody were greeted by Fives, Ordo, Kal Skirata and Walon Vau. Fives frowned deeply as he looked over the former commander of the 212th Attach Battalion now dressed in the elite ebony clad armor of those worn by stealth troopers. Seeing that his hands were tied behind his back did nothing for Fives's resolve. Disappointment mainly filled within Fives, but also pity, sorry and anger as he continued to look at the commander. _He__'__s __here __for __a __reason __Fives,_ Bella's voice played in his mind. He had told her as soon as he got off the comm with Rex that Cody would be joining them. _Help __him __learn __that __there__'__s __more __to __life __other __than __strict __walls, __cruel __words __and __harsh __regulations._

Cody stopped in front of Fives, standing at attention. "Like what you see Fives?A traitor like you could never wear such a thing. But maybe your brother, he was so much more loyal, so much more by the book. He would have made a fine Imperial trooper," Cody's voice dripped with vile ooze.

Fives's lip curled and snarled, "You don't ever get to speak about Echo Imp trash!" _So much for kind words. _Fives cranked back his arm and fist, but a strong hand restrained him. Kal Skirata, the man who made Kyrimorut happen and brought sanctuary to his family, shook his head negatively at Fives.

"Don't son, you'll regret it later." Fives relaxed his arm, but the pure seething revulsion toward Cody was unmistaken.

"Listen you," Skirata shoved Cody against his chest, causing him to take a few steps back. Kal Skirata wasn't a giant, wasn't even as tall as the men he helped saved, but he was wise, strong and well-respected to those who did and didn't know him. Only the dim-whited dared to try and challenge him. "Everyone here has a story to be told of tragedy, loss, pain, remorse, repentance, and the list goes on. They come here for a new, better life and to heal. You are here because someone cares enough about you to think you are worth saving. I have no problem putting a blaster to a traitor's head when it comes to the safety of my family and neither does Vau here or any of the Null boys. You get one chance Commander, use it wisely."

Cody and Skirata stared at each other while the others watched in tense silence seeing who would back down first. "Maybe you should just shoot now," Cody finally said.

"I suggest you try and find an outlet first before you decide that's the best path. Ordo, could you please take him inside and give him a room. We'll be by to see you later, Commander," Skirata did not take his eyes off the man until Ordo and Cody were half way to the house.

"That was intense," Walon Vau breathed.

"He needs a lot of help," Skirata sighed.

"Sometimes, some of us are beyond help," Fives spat on the ground and wiped his mouth in distain.

"I hope not Fives," Rex disagreed, but Ahsoka was tending to agree with Fives. Maybe some people just didn't want to be saved.

The mention of people, the echoing of footsteps on the steal ramp turned everyone's attention to the woman making her way toward them. Curious and suspicious gazes turned to her.

"This is our pilot…" Rex started.

"Thea!" Fives gaped. He couldn't believe it was really her. The exception of the vicious scar that ran across her face, she was the same as he remembered when she was with his brother. Small, delicate, the laugh lines still there and faint, but replaced was a look he was unfortunately all too familiar with. Distant, scornful and bitter, he had worn it himself after his brother had died and didn't care about life until he had met Bella.

"Fives," Thea whispered and nodded slightly toward him.

Feeling the awkwardness, Ahsoka nudged Rex who cleared his throat and asked, "Fives, you said that you had something to share with us?"

Fives took his eyes off the fiery red haired woman and turned to Rex. "It's more than you could have ever imagined Rex, more than we all could ever hope for. Come on, get settled and then we'll catch up." He directed his gaze back to Thea.

* * *

><p>Ahsoka stared at the large house in front of her and all she could hear were the thumps of her heart pounding in her ears. <em>Just <em>_a __few __more __feet __and __you__'__ve __made __it __through __the __threshold. __Do __it. __If __you __want __answers, __do __it. _But Ahsoka's feet were frozen in place.

"Soka?" She could hear Rex's voice in the back of her mind, but it did not register to her.

_If __you __want __to __mend __broken __bridges, __fight __the __monsters __that __haunt __you, __walk__ forward. _Her feet would not cooperate with her though. They felt like they were covered in cement and plastered to the ground. _I__'__m __not __ready. __I __want __to __go __back __home__…__I __want __to __go __back __to _Saleucami_, __to __the __farm, __back __to __Suu, __Cut __and __the __children. __To __the __eopies __and __the __farm. __Back __to __where __I __can __hide._

"Rex," Ahsoka uttered his name weakly. She looked up at Rex with her frightened blue eyes.

"Soka?" Rex concerned at the "deer in the headlight" look she was giving him, he reached for his blaster at the possibility she sensed danger. What he wasn't expecting was the young Jedi to toss her duffle on the ground and take off at a dead run away from him, away from having to confront everything she and Rex came to Mandalore for and fled into the fields, leaving Rex dumbstruck.

_Coward,_ her heart screamed.

_I know, _her mind whimpered.

"Ahsoka!" Rex yelled at the top of his lungs.

* * *

><p><em>So I know Cody is a bit out of character, but he's been through some major drama (you'll find out why and what later)<em>

_Can Ahsoka confront her fears, will Rex understand, and Thea, will she find her answers? Stay tuned for more! _

_I want to say a big thank you to _**Sachariah, Queen, Laloga, Jess Marylin, Redone **& **General Herbison** for their awesomeness and reviews!


	5. Chapter 5

_Hi all,_

_here is the next installment! Please R & R! _

_Enjoy._

* * *

><p>Rex's thunderous wail shook the earth that they stood on sending tremors up Fives and Thea's body causing their hair to stand edge. Without question they both took off toward the house. Fives, built for uncanny speed raced ahead of Thea to aid his distraught brother. Thea falling behind came to an abrupt halt as a blur whizzed by her and into the large garden-looking field. Heaving for a breath, she brushed back the errant hairs that fell into her face and looked toward the house where Fives was already at Rex's side. Looking back toward the crop field, she bit the bottom of her lip and questioned if she should follow. One last glance back at the home stead, she made up her mind.<p>

Thea wasn't familiar with the kind of crops grown on this planet or even if these were native plants, but they were tall, thick and was an abundant of them. They were large with green stalks, thick luscious leaves and the most beautiful colored flowers she had ever seen. Oranges, purples, reds, pinks, blues, yellows, Thea paused to soak in such magnificent colors. Standing amongst these flowers and jubilant hues almost made her feel…_happy. __The __same __happy __when __I __was __with __Echo._

She could feel the corner of her scared mouth slightly tip up, something she had not done since his death and it felt _good._ She tilted one of the flowers over to smell and noticed four little berries inside. Thea looked at another flower, this one orange and it also had four little orange berries. Each different colored flower had corresponding berries. She dared to try one and it was heaven. She closed her eyes in pure bliss and licked the juice as it spilled on her lips.

Pulled out of her trance at the sound of muffled sobs, Thea wiped her mouth with the back of her hand and carefully made her way through the jungle of flowers as the sobs got louder and stopped as she came upon the source.

Huddling with her knees curled up to her chest with her arms wrapped around them sat the young Torgurta on the spongy earth softly crying to herself.

"Ahsoka?" Thea called out gently not to startle the girl. Ahsoka's head flew up, blue eyes stained red and rimmed with tears.

"I can't go in that house," she choked out and swiped at her eyes.

"Then don't," Thea shortly replied.

Ahsoka looked at the woman in a mixture of puzzlement and irritation. "Then don't? Can't you give more reassuring words like "if you go back, you and Rex can work things through?"

"Is that what you want to hear?"

"No, I guess not," Ahsoka mumbled. "It wouldn't work anyways because Rex and I can't work it out."

This time Thea gave the girl a look of puzzlement. "Why?"

"Because," Ahsoka said shortly.

"Because why?" Thea pressed.

"Because behind that front door lays answers that I am not ready to hear okay? Maybe I'll never be ready to hear them. Maybe Rex is better off without me because I'll never be able to get over that hurdle or be that strong Jedi he thinks I am or…or be family that he deserves!" Ahsoka hollered at Thea and punched the ground with angry fists.

Thea walked up to the upset Jedi, folded her legs and sat down next to her. "Is it the answers you're afraid of or the affect they will cause?"

"Both I guess," she uttered and rested her chin on her knees.

"Me too," Thea confessed.

Ahsoka cocked her head sideways and asked mystified, "Then why did you agree to give us a ride here knowing who Rex was?"

"Well, a smart young Jedi told me once that I can't always run away because my problems will catch me no matter how good of hiding place I may find," Thea lightly pushed Ahsoka on the shoulder.

"So I'm finding out," Ahsoka's lips lifted at the corner of her mouth in a small smile as both women's words were thrown back at each other.

"Truth is I miss him a lot and no matter how much misery I put myself, others through I can't rid of his memory," Thea sighed and slowly inhaled the sweet perfume of the flowers. It almost had a calming effect on her. She had not been this open since Echo's death and being inside this field of beauty brought her peace and tranquility around and within her.

"Why would you want to forget him?" Ahsoka asked curiously.

"The same reason you don't want to walk through that front door," Thea retorted softly.

They sat in introspective silence; Thea picked a couple berries from each different color flower and popped a red one in her mouth. She closed her eyes as the sweet cherry flavor blanketed her taste buds and a full smile blossomed on her lips. She opened her eyes to see Ahsoka gazing amusingly at her and a small tint of pink began to stain her cheeks.

"Try one," Thea held her hand with the berries out to Ahsoka who looked down at the fruit wearingly. "I have never tasted something…"

"That filled you with warmth, happiness and a craving for more?" Ahsoka raised a brow.

"How'd you…" but Thea stopped herself when she remembered who she was talking to. "Yes, exactly. Well, maybe only one other time."

"With Echo?" Ahsoka took a blueberry and squeezed it between her teeth, letting the juice splash into her mouth and dribble down her chin. "Oops!" She giggled, wiping up the mess, but the berry left a small blue stain on her orange skin. Thea also gave a soft laugh.

"Yes with Echo," Thea said mistily. Ahsoka took another berry from Thea, thoroughly enjoying the sweet taste and pondered about how Rex would react when she did return.

"It's getting late," Thea brushed her hands on her flight suite and looked toward the darkening sky and before Ahsoka replied suddenly spots of florescent luminosities glistened over them.

Ahsoka and Thea examined their arms, legs;gasping as the beautiful colors highlighted not only their bodies, but also on the ground giving a dazzling disco-like affect.

As day began to fade into dusk the colorful flowers on the giant stocks lit up like little lanterns and both girls gazed at in amazement. "I've never seen such a thing before!" Ahsoka laughed.

"It's exquisite isn't it," Thea breathed. As much as she wanted to stay out here in the loveliness and serenity of the garden, Thea knew it wouldn't last for much longer. "We have to go back Ahsoka."

The young Torguta kept her attention on the colorful flowers and let out a long sigh. "I wish we could stay out here forever. This is the beauty I want to feel all the time."

"I know what you mean," Thea said understandingly.

"Rex is a very understanding man, but I think this time I have pushed his limit. He's going to be so angry with me. I don't know if I can look in his eyes and stand to see the disappointment in them," the girl muttered dolefully.

"Then make him understand," Thea unfolded her legs and got up, brushing some of the dirt off of her.

"I don't know how," Ahsoka finally looked at her, eyes sorrowful and begging for answers to her questions. _I __don__'__t __know __how __either __little __Jedi._

"I'll make you a deal Ahsoka," Thea's chest began to constrict and heart race. "You walk through that threshold and I'll tell you about Echo. There isn't much to say mind you, but maybe it'll help with some of your questions," Thea held out her hand toward the Jedi.

Ahsoka studied Thea's hand and then firmly took it into hers. Thea helped her off the ground and they looked at their small bit of heaven one more time. "Are you sure you want to leave this?" Ahsoka asked tentatively.

"No, but we have too. Come on, let's go." Thea let Ahsoka walk in front of her and they made their way out of the labyrinth of giant stocks. Before completely leaving the crop, Thea stopped at the edge and looked to her side. All by its lonely was a glowing saffron-colored flower, like a small torch lighting the entrance. Thea gently picked the flower and its glow instantly died. The flower began to wilt, turning from a lovely buttercup yellow to a bistre-brown.

Thea opened her mouth, but no sound was made. The flower continued to wilt until it was black as if it had been burned and completely shriveled, falling lifelessly onto the ground. All gone was the happy, blissful feeling when she was inside the garden; replaced with a shell of horrid, lonely loathsomeness. The despondency was suffocating as she fought to keep the small spark of joy ignited in her. _I __don__'__t __understand! __I__'__m __going __to __help __her; __I __want __to __be __released __from __all __of __this. __I __want __to __remember __him __and __smile __again. __I __don__'__t __want __to __feel __hopeless __anymore._

"Thea, are you alright?" Ahsoka's concerned voice brought her back to consciousness. _No, __I__'__m __not __alright._

Giving the Jedi a small assuring smile so that Ahsoka would think that she was okay, Thea dropped the remains of the dead flower on the ground and pressed her boot onto it as she made her way towards Ahsoka. "Maybe one day," Thea murmured.

* * *

><p>After much persuasion and assurance from Fives, Rex found himself inside the house anxiously drumming his fingers on the exceptionally large couch in the main living room. Any other time Rex would have taken note of the interesting décor, the blaze burning in the fireplace the warmth it radiated, but nothing right now could warm him or take his mind off that Ahsoka had ran from him.<p>

Questions raced at a dizzying speed as to where had Ahsoka had run off to, why did she run, was she in trouble and was it his fault? _I __pushed __her __into __coming; __she __told __me __she __wasn__'__t __ready. _Along with worry; anger, annoyance and resentment also raged within. Why would she do that to him? Why couldn't she just trust him?

"Drink this, it'll help," the soft angelic voice of Fives's wife, Bella broke Rex from his stupor and reached for the glass absently. The drink was like warm rich silk as it traveled down his sore throat. He looked up to the tie-dye colored woman questioningly.

"It's hot chocolate," she gave Rex a warm smile and with one hand balanced on her round stomach and one on the back cushions of the couch, she slowly lowered herself next to Rex.

"She just ran," Rex said dumbfounded that she would do such a thing. "She ran away from me. She never looked that frightened Bella, not even on that night."

A woman of exquisite nature and beauty, Bella was one of the few people Rex knew that had a true heart of gold. Strong, fearless and love for her husband that could power a whole planet, Rex only had respect for her. She had shown Fives in his darkest hour that life was worth fighting for as she opened her arms and heart to him. Through her, Fives realized that there was more than just being a number and model for his armor.

Bella had without second thought let Rex and Ahsoka into her life as well, even without knowing them and tended to their needs while waiting anxiously for Fives as Order 66 took place. Her trust in Fives led them to a very different life than either one was accustomed to, but with faith in each other they had flourished proving with their child on the way.

_I __didn__'__t __shoot __that __night, __but __she __still __doesn__'__t __trust __me! __Why!_

"I don't think she was running from you, Rex, but away from whatever is frightening her." Bella answered softly.

"But what if what's she's afraid of _is_ me?" He asked frustrated. He had been going in circles with Ahsoka, then with Cody, got an earful from Thea and now he was baffled as ever sitting next to Bella. _Why __can__'__t __anything __be __as __black __and __white __as __the __military __was?_

"Have you asked her?"

"No not straight out asking," he answered a bit guiltily, but then rounded, "I've tried talking to her, seriously talking to her about things that happened, didn't happen, could have happened and how we should fix it, fix us, but she won't listen. She did say that she was afraid for me and of _him_, but I don't think that's everything. Bella, how can we ever go forward when we can't forgive and forget the past?"

"You can't fix everything by your own. She's still afraid for you. Rex, have you ever just sat down with her and listened to the why?" Bella leaned forward as much as her pregnant stomach would allow her to and ran her finger tracing Rex's hairline as a mother stroking a child's hair out of their face.

The tables had somehow turned on Rex when he wasn't paying attention. Fives, the young, lost clone who seemed so adrift to who he was, what he wanted, came to Rex for answers about his and Ahsoka's relationship and looked up to Rex as an older brother, had grown into a self-assured man. Now looking to Fives and Bella for advice, Rex felt like the one who was drifting.

"Fives and I still have moments more often than not adjusting to this lifestyle. It's not something either one of us thought or prepared for especially when we found out about the baby," Bella murmured. "We kind of just went with the flow after the tides stopped rippling."

"How does Fives understand this better than me?" Rex didn't mean to sound so jealous, but he was. His former trooper had figured life as a civilian or as well as a trooper hiding as a civilian could be. How come a trained, well respected ex-clone captain couldn't make the change?

"He doesn't, none of the men who are here understand. The difference Rex is that Fives, these men, your brothers, have been able to figure out who they are and want to be. Granted walls do get built, boundries are formed when there are unfamiliar changes or situations, they have come to accept that whether ARC trooper, Commando or trooper is what they were and doesn't control who they are now." Bella took ahold of Rex's hand and gave a gentle squeeze. Emerald eyes looked upon the lost captain with sympathetic love.

"Do you know who you are? Have you decided if you are the captain or are you her friend, partner and lover? Can the captain allow the man inside to be free? Can the captain co-exist with the free man? She loves you very much Rex. Perhaps you haven't given yourself a chance to hear yourself or Ahsoka. Listen to her, even if it is a sigh of frustration, a sob of relief or a simple holding of the hands."

_Who __am __I?_ The question continued to taunt Rex.

Rex looked longingly at Bella's large stomach and his gut twisted. Family was so unfamiliar to him, but he knew he wanted it and there was only one person he would have it with. Could the captain accept being a husband and possibly a father someday?

Feeling Bella shift on the couch and grimace as she did so, Rex asked, "Does it hurt?" Bella was slightly taken off balance by the change in topic and question, but a smile blossomed on her pretty face.

"No, sometimes it can get a little uncomfortable when the little one wants to stretch out for more room. It's kind of a weird feeling knowing that there is a being inside of you and growing. She's just very active right now."

"You know what it's going to be?" Rex asked surprised.

Bella nodded, "Fives was beyond ecstatic. I thought he would have preferred a boy, but this will be daddy's little girl. She will have him wrapped around her little fingers in no time."

The image of the strong, lethal ARC trooper gently holding and cooing to an infant brought a small chuckle from Rex.

"I'm sure she will," Rex agreed.

"He was frightened when we found out. We argued about keeping the baby at first. I was devastated when he suggested such a thing. I was foolish enough to think he didn't want children with me, but that wasn't it." Bella's blues yellows turned almost into an aqua-green as they deepened with her emotions.

* * *

><p>"Fives, please say something," Bella begged. Fives sat frozen and didn't feel her delicate hands grasp ahold of his.<p>

"Baby?" Fives whispered dumbly.

"Yes, our baby," Bella placed his large hand on her flat stomach. It wouldn't be flat for much longer.

"We were always so careful," his dark eyes came into focus and glared almost accusingly at Bella. Her lekku twitched in tension and heartache and the blue and yellow hues on her face flushed in agitation.

"Sometimes things happen for a reason," she tried to keep her voice steady as not to let Fives know how upset she really was.

"This isn't just something Bella, this is a baby! What do I know about a baby? What do you know about having a baby?" Fives jumped off the bed as if being near her burned him.

"Well it's happened and there's no turning back," anger seeped into her voice.

He paced in front of her, running a nervous hand through his black hair. Fives heart pounded in his chest as the words _baby_ replayed in his head. _I __can__'__t __be __a __father; __I__'__m __not suited for this task__._

"You don't have to have it," Fives winced as soon as the words slipped from his lips. Bella looked aghast at the mention that she should terminate her pregnancy. As he looked at his wife who looked at him with unshed tears, hurt and anger he realized his mistake. Fives fell to his knees in front of Bella and took her hands into his, his head buried in her lap.

"Oh god Bella, please forgive me," he pleaded sorrowfully. "Please, please forgive me my love," he looked up at her and the scared, vulnerable man he liked to push away, shown brightly in his coffee-colored eyes.

Bella slid her hand out of Fives grasp and ran her fingers in his baby-fine hair. "Fives, I understand that you are scared; I am too, but do you really want me to get rid of our baby?"

"I don't know how to be a father, I am just after all a clone who was born out of a jar," Fives whimpered.

Bella took a firm grasp of Fives's chin and glared at him, jaded spheres sparkling with fury and love. "Growing inside here is a part of you Fives, _you._ You may have been born unconventionally and if you were some mindless drone I wouldn't have given a second thought about you or a baby, but you are a man, a husband and now a father." She softened her tone and let go of his chin, gently running it on his cheek. "We'll learn together Fives, unless you really want me to give up our creation."

"But what if I mess up?" Fives asked shakily.

"Then we'll clean up together," she tenderly kissed his forehead. Fives straightened out his arms only to wrap them around Bella's waist.

"Forgive me," he muttered against her velvet lips. "I love you more than anything Bella; it's just one more thing to remind me what I missed out on."

"Don't let our child miss on having the chance of a good father. We can do this Fives," Bella encouraged, though still stung by the suggestion of ridding of the baby.

"I'll try my best, Bella." Fives quieted for a moment and bit the bottom of his lip. "Father, dad… I think I like the sound of that," he grinned.

* * *

><p>"What was it? What was Fives afraid of?" Rex cocked his head inquisitively.<p>

"He was afraid that never having a father or a mother himself he couldn't properly raise a child and that somehow he would make too many mistakes."

"I would too, what do we only have to offer other than reciting and teaching archaic rules and regulations?" Rex asked.

"That's not true Rex. Fives, like all the men and women here including you, are passionate and compassionate. Having been able to rise above the number that you were assigned, to find that uniqueness that makes you, you are the kind of role model I want my child to be raised around. While both Fives and I are very nervous, I know that he'll be a wonderful father because of how impossibly human he is. Because he can make mistakes and learn from them."

_Impossibly __human__…__or __am __I __still __a __clone __captain? __Who __am __I? _Suddenly his thoughts turned to Cody. _We __are __still __prisoners __aren__'__t __we __brother?_

Rex sighed, "I don't want to be lost between identities. I want to know who I am."

"Let her help you. Remember we all make mistakes; it takes a real person to stop, listen and learn from them."

* * *

><p><em>So, what do you think? <em>

_Lots more drama and angst to come for everyone. There will be a light at the end of the tunnel-some day! _

_Thank you to everyone who has taken the time to read and review! You're all awesome and I really appreciate it! _

_If I don't get the next chapter up soon, Merry Christmas to all! _


	6. Chapter 6

_Here is the next installment! Hope you enjoy please review!_

* * *

><p>Cody sighed; frustrated and bored being locked away in an unfamiliar room was not something the commander of the 212th Attack Battalion was accustomed to. His arms ached from having them bind behind his back for hours and his hands had long ago fallen asleep. He winced as he tried to move his fingers only to receive a sharp, painful tingly sensation in return. Cody shifted and his frown deepened as the stealth armor, too big for him scrape on his hot, sweaty and dirty skin and not for the first time he wished he was able to remove the uncomfortable plates. Not that he would complain openly about his discomfort.<p>

Looking around the sparse room which only had a bed, dresser and lamp, Cody did appreciate the fact that it was roomy and had a large bed to accommodate him. _Much better than the GAR barracks, but not nearly as nice as sharing a bed with…_

Cody punched himself mentally and stopped that train of thoughts before they went any further. _Thinking about her only makes things worse. Forget about her, forget about everyone. Do what you have to do to survive and don't let anything or one get to you._ Cody had already failed himself once, letting Rex dig the knife deeply into a wound that would not heal.

"I got to get out of here," Cody muttered, but first he would need to free his sore hands. Biting the side of his cheek, he looked around the room for anything sharp that would create a tear. He just needed a little leverage to rip the bind apart. Cody rolled himself ungracefully out of bed, almost falling to his knees until he caught his balance. With a soft curse, he stood up and walked into the small refresher that was connected with the room. Looking for anything that might have a sharp edge, Cody turned backwards so that he could open some of drawers and cabinets. Hissing as his hands protested from the lack of use, he tried to ignore the pain. Turning back around to look in the drawers, he spotted a small pair of scissors. _Fools,_ Cody thought smugly. Now the real trick would be handling the tool without being able to see what he was doing or what he was actually cutting.

Blindly picking up the scissors, Cody wiggled and maneuvered his fingers until the blade of the tool was pointing up. A knock at the door startled Cody causing the scissors slipped a few times, growling and cursing as he tried to position them in the right spot. Having to work in haste, Cody guessed he was in the right spot and made an attempt to snip the material. Looking at the door and hoping that whoever was there would leave, Cody unseeingly snipped at the bind.

It took a moment before the pain registered in his mind and suddenly he howled in agony. "Dammit!" Cody hollered. He had cut his hand badly enough for his blood to rush out. "Sith, sith, sith!"

"Cody?" the familiar voice of his ex-friend called to him worriedly. _Can this day get any worse!_

"What are you doing in here..." Rex's voice trailed off as he saw the blood dripping from behind Cody. "Kriff!"

"Well, I'm not taking a piss in here if that's what you wanted to know," Cody snarled trying to rile his old comrade up and get his attention away from his self-inflicted wound.

Rex glared at Cody; instead of taking the bate and pushed him by the chest so that he would step back against the sink. Cody didn't struggle against Rex knowing very well he was in a compromised place. Rex none too gently pulled Cody closer to the sink so that his hands were in the basin and turned on the cool water, watching the blood meld with the water and swirl down the drain.

"I'm going to release you so I can get a better look at your cut. Don't try anything Cody," Rex warned.

"Wouldn't think about it, boss," Cody winced again as Rex cut the material and the circulation and blood poured back into his hands. His wound oozed more blood into the porcelain sink.

"You did a good job nicking yourself," Rex scowled as Cody turned around to face the sink and wash his cut. "Trying to make your escape?"

"Trying to, but obviously failed. Much like other things," Cody mumbled under his breath.

"You're going to need a couple of stiches," Rex said neutrally and continued to watch as Cody kept his hand under the cool, rushing water.

"No thank you," Cody distantly grimaced. "This wouldn't even have happened if you didn't need to take me hostage." Cody took the material that once bound his hands and wrapped it tightly around his cut. Within seconds blood was seeping through.

"We didn't take you hostage if you remember. We, I, want to help you and you left us no choice. And it was you who wanted to take Ahsoka and me hostage and trade in for a couple lousy coins," Rex growled.

Cody turned to glare at Rex, who met him with burning ember eyes. "At least I made a profit after I left and didn't soil my soul with a runaway Jedi." Cody turned to step out of the room and Rex followed giving the man a hard shove on the shoulder. Cody stumbled a few steps and turned around once again to face Rex, angry blazing and ready to fight.

"What will do it Cody? Do you realize how lucky you are? You no longer belong to a hive and can be your own man!" Rex bellowed.

"What do you know about being your own man Rex?" Cody snapped back. "You talk as though you know what it is to be free and yet you still seek out the comforts of your brothers! Isn't the little woman keeping you warm at night?"

The pain registered immediately as Rex's fist connected squarely onto Cody's jaw. A loud pop was heard as bones snapped. "Son on a sith!" Rex roared, instantly cradling his injured fist against his chest.

The impact against his face had sent Cody tumbling against his bed and slithered down the side onto the floor and his eyes watered; face pounding as he realized Rex had punched him. Moving his jaw ever so slightly to see if it had indeed been broken, Cody winced and groaned as the throbbing shot up his jaw. It wasn't broken, but it was going to be severely bruised. He wasn't going to be surprised if his who right side would turn black and blue and he would have to eat and drink out of a straw for several days.

Panting, Rex took a few deep breaths to calm himself. "Are we just going to keep going in rounds with each other, Cody?" Rex suddenly drained of all energy asked. "I have to tell you, I'm tired. I'm tired of fighting, from running, from hiding. I can't seem to understand why Ahoska and I can't get pass this wall, if that's what they call it and I hate it. I'm used to being the go to man, the one with the resources and knowledge. Too many questions are being asked and not enough answers to fulfill them and I hate it! I feel like I'm losing control."

Cody pushed himself up onto the bed, reeling with exploding misery in his mouth. His jaw was already starting to swell and a nasty looking bruise faintly began to blemish his tanned skin.

"If you wanted control Rex, why did you ever leave the GAR?" Cody's speech was slightly slurred as he tried to not move his jaw that much.

Taking another deep breath, letting his shoulders slump and buried his chin into his chest Rex mumbled, "Because they would have killed Ahsoka and I couldn't let that happen." Cody looked at Rex as if he had seen one of the most talked about and revered clones for the first time. This man, his friend who risked his life numerous times for his general, commander, men and Cody, who's friendship and brotherhood men craved to have, a man who devoted his heart and soul to his job and those he cared closely about stood before Cody like a man who was designated for reconditioning. And Cody understood.

"I understand," Cody softly spoke. Rex's head shot up. _Did I hear right? Did he just say he understood?_

"What?" Rex responded, lost for words.

"I said, you di'kut, I understand," Cody grumbled. "When Order 66 was issued I felt myself leave my body. I could hear my brain shout that this wasn't true that I misheard the order. I almost could see myself from the outside respond just like the drone that so many thought us for. I wanted to pull the drone from his stupor and shake, punch, even shoot just to wake him," Cody was numb. He couldn't stop himself from talking now that he started. It just seemed to pour out and each word stung like a million hot needles as he explained to Rex.

Rex slowly approached the bed and sat down next to Cody, careful not to jar his hand. "That's how it was for me when I held the gun to Ahsoka," Rex said. "It was me, but not me. I knew she was there, I could see her eyes plead for a merciful ending, but I continued tell myself that I had to follow this order, that's what all good captains would do."

"What stopped you?"

"I love her," Rex answered instantly. Cody began to say something, but a sharp hiss elicited through his lips. "I got you pretty good there didn't I?" Rex looked at the dark bruise spreading across the commander's cheek.

"Yeah thanks. Don't let me forget to even the score later," Cody groused.

"I think it's pretty even you block head," Rex gave Cody the faintest of smiles. "I think you busted a couple of my fingers and/or knuckles."

"Good," Cody snorted.

Rex rolled his eyes, but was relieved and felt as if some weight had been lifted from his shoulders. _It's a start._ "Come on." Cody looked at Rex wearily. "This isn't a trick nor am I going to "take you around the barn." I'm sure someone is skilled as a medic around here. Just don't try anything."

"What would I do?" Cody scowled. "There are a bunch of crazy mandos, a Jedi, ex-troopers and I have a busted jaw. Where do you think I'm going to go?"

"I'm glad we're on the same path," Rex smirked.

* * *

><p>Under the skeptical eyes of Kal Skirata and Fives, Rex and Cody sat at the main dining table as Mij Gilamar, doctor and ex-member of the Cyu'val Dar popped another finger into place on Rex's hand. Closing his eyes so the people around him could not see the tears building in them the pain sent shockwaves throughout his body; Rex mumbled a few impressive curse words and then bit his lower lip. Gilamar rose an "oh really" brow at Rex and then at Cody.<p>

"So do you boys want to tell me what happened?" Mij asked skeptically.

"Yes, I am very interested to know how Rex came upon having a broken hand," Fives acidly asked.

Cody looked at the former ARC trooper who had narrowed his eyes scathingly at him, and gave Fives a nonchalant shrug of the shoulders. "He must have slipped and fell on his hand," Cody slurred.

"Really, because I was just wondering how you ended up with a nice gash on yours and a nasty bruise on your face," Fives bit back.

"Fives, enough," Kal Skirata lightly commanded. Fives huffed and sat back in his chair, arms folded over his chest. Skirata turned back to look at the two injured clones. "But he's right. What happened?" He pointedly looked at Rex.

_I am not designed to handle civilian talk. I need to learn,_ Rex gulped back his anxiety as his brown eyes met with Skirata's. He saw nothing but understanding, compassion and yet held enough hardness to command the respect of those around him. He glanced out of the corner of his eye and saw Cody glaring at him. _Trust me brother._

"We had a "Come to Force" talk," Rex winced once again as Gilamar finished dressing his hand.

"Jusik will be able to heal that fully-he's better than any bacta," Gilamar said.

Cody turned his head so curtly that Rex swore he heard his friend's neck crack. "There's another Jedi staying here?" He harshly asked.

Once again, Skirata met Cody with a hard, cold as steel glare and the people in the room held their breaths as the two came head to head. "And if there is?" Skirata challenged.

Rex could see the turmoil burn in Cody's eyes and the small tick in the side of his jaw as he thought of a response. A low, irritated rumbled formed at the back of Cody's throat. He clenched his wounded hand and splotches of blood began to seep through the new bandage, but he did not break eye contact with the sergeant.

"You can make a choice Son," Skirata said in a deliberate but formidable voice, "embrace your past, your present and your future, adapt to living as a free man and accept those who would have been your enemy or face eternal darkness. Cody, I am not going to sweet talk or beg you into being a part of this aliit, but we all know, you know, you cannot go back. For whatever reason you broke yourself away from the iron chains the Empire had on you and yet you have not found your freedom. You can choose to heal yourself or die a broken man."

It felt like a one two punch to Rex's gut as Skirata words spoke volumes. I _have not found my freedom… Freedom…Where do I find my freedom? I do not want to die a broken man._

Cody finally looked away angrily from Skirata and stared at the table, brooding over the truth of the statement. He slightly jumped when he felt someone touching his sore hand and realized it was a bloody mess.

"Jusik can also heal that for you as well…" Gilamar started but Cody abruptly interrupted.

"No, no Jedi. Just stich it; let it scar."

* * *

><p>Ahsoka and Thea stood outside the house, Thea's hand on the doorknob. "You ready?" she asked.<p>

Ahsoka took a deep breath and slowly let it out. "I think so." As Thea began to turn the knob, Ahsoka's hand flew out and stopped her. "Wait," she quickly said. Paused in mid-motion, Thea waited for Ahsoka to continue. "Tell me, please, one thing about you and Echo."

It was more of a plea than a request from their bargain and as much as Thea dreaded it, she was beginning to like the young Jedi. The girl needed her help and even if it meant slowly opening herself up to sore and painful memories, Thea would make the baby steps to aid Ahsoka. _No use in everyone living in misery. _

"My favorite memory of Echo was on his last day of leave and I came back from a mission and found him in the barracks. It was completely empty except him and he was dressed only in his briefs," Thea closed her eyes a light smile cracking on her lips at the memory of Echo and how flushed he got when she caught him almost naked. "He was embarrassed at first, turning beat red. He noticed how I was looking at him and the tables turned on me and he became so cocky, not that I minded too much afterwards. He was so handsome. I became flushed and almost dashed out of the room, but thank goodness he caught me before I made the worst mistake of my life. He told me that he didn't want me to leave, though I was worried someone walking in on us."

Echo's striking smile flashed before Thea, weakening her knees.

Ahsoka's eyes slightly widened as the thought of what they were about to do popped into her mind.

"No, no little girl," Thea lightly admonished. "We didn't do that. He must have sensed how nervous I was and told me that we didn't have to do anything. I told him I just wanted him to hold me and he did. We lay in his bunk for, oh I don't know, must have been hours as I talked his head off about the various missions I went on and he listened so patiently. We ended drifting asleep, his arm tightly around my waist and my back sung against his chest. It wasn't until the early morning when Fives woke us and told Echo and me that the superiors were coming. Echo gave me the tenderest of kisses, enough to make you want to weep. If I knew that was the last time I got to feel him, kiss him, be near him, I would have gotten over my nervousness." Thea paused for a second. Goosebumps covered her arms and she visibly shivered as the warmness of the memory disappeared and she was blanketed in ice. "Ahsoka, do you know why I told you about the particular memory?"

"No," she shook her head.

"Always make the most of what you have. You never know when it'll be your last." Thea, with Ahsoka's hand still on top of hers, turned the knob and opened the door.

* * *

><p><em>Thank you all for your fantastic reviews and support! Makes it worth writing =)<em>

_I hope you continue to enjoy the story-more to come soon!_

_If I don't get the next chapter up, have a great and safe new years! _


	7. Chapter 7

_Hi all,_

_here is the next installment. As always, I own nothing. Hope you enjoy! _

* * *

><p><em>It's just one more scar to add to a list of many,<em> Cody groused to himself as Gilamar finished stitching his hand. When the Mando/doctor was finished Cody slowly flexed his hand, noting the limited mobility at the moment.

"Give it a couple of weeks, it's going to take some time to heal since it was a pretty deep cut," Gilamar gathered up his tools and lightly patted Cody on the shoulder. Unsure how to react to the kindness from the older man, Cody only nodded.

The ex-commander looked toward Rex who was resting his bandaged hand on the table and regarding him tiredly, but ready to talk and then turned to his other side where Fives was no longer glaring daggers at him, but ready to spring given the chance. Cody opened his mouth to speak and the sound of a startled gasp made all the men at the table turn and look at the source.

"Ahsoka!" Rex cried out in surprise, standing up so quickly that he tipped his chair over. He hissed and cradled his injured hand to his chest once again as the pain intensely spiked at the jarring movement.

Both Thea and Ahsoka looked at the disheveled and beat up men with confusion and worry and then looked at Fives, Skirata and the other who neither one recognized.

"What happened?" Ahsoka finally asked, but didn't make an attempt to come closer to Rex. Rex looked down at Cody who was brooding in his seat.

"So much for that talk, aye Rex?" Cody questioned scornfully. Cody actually didn't mean to sound so…jealous, but he was actually ready to talk to Rex a little about the cruel pain that had been tormenting him, but not in front of people he didn't know and surely not in front of a Jedi.

"Get up," Fives grabbed Cody by his plated collar and hauled him out of his seat. "I don't care if you _were_ a commander, you're nothing here and you better show some respect to those who want to keep you alive. Why I don't know!" Fives shoved Cody toward the stair case.

"Fives," Rex yelled to his friend, quickly putting an end to a vicious and potential deadly fight. "Not tonight. Cody," Rex turned his attention to the desolate man, "We will talk my friend, I promise."

"Goody," Cody grumbled. Through he put up a cavalier attitude toward the group around him, Cody was anything but calm and indifferent inside. Turbulent thoughts twisted and turned as the impending talk loomed over head.

Fives once again pushed Cody forward and as he put a foot onto the step, a soft voice halted their movement once again. "I'll take him up." Eyes instantly drew to Thea and she was unaffected to their stares.

Cody blinked in confusion at the red-headed, scared girl. "Aren't you afraid that I'll do something to you?" He asked.

"Are you stupid enough to do something to me with a room full of fully trained soldiers, Jedi and Mandalorians?" She shot back. The click of jaw slamming shut could be heard and much to everyone's surprise, Thea approached Cody. She gently laid her hand between where his shoulder blades would be and encouraged him forward. Fives, Rex and Ahsoka watched with wonder and bewilderment as the two disappeared up the staircase and how easily Cody complied with the woman.

"I think I should follow to make sure she's okay," Fives said uncertainly.

"No," Rex shook his head and when Fives gave him a dubious look, the captain in Rex slightly returned as he issued the small but placid orders, "Cody won't hurt her. It's late Fives, we'll continue in the morning." Fives gave one more glance up the stairs and then made his way over to his captain, clapping him on the shoulder.

"Always the captain. It's good to have you here, Rex." Fives gave Rex a loose smile and retreated out of the room. Little did Fives know how much those three little words impacted Rex. _Always the captain. Is that what I'll be even if I am changing? What if I can never change? What if I can never abandon the captain? What then?_

Ahsoka still stood in the entry way of the dining room, making no attempt to come closer to Rex, but her body was relaxed and did not have the "deer in the headlight" look about her. Still cradling his bandaged hand to his chest, Rex stood by the table also making no move to come closer to the Jedi. _Someone has to make the first move. She hurt me, why should it be me? Because you love her and the man inside of you is bigger than the prideful captain. _

Even with the busted hand, Rex was graceful in his movement and within a couple of steps he was standing in front of Ahsoka. She fixed her gaze on his hurt hand, unable to look him in the eyes knowing the wrong she had done.

"You ran away," Rex said vacantly. He expected to be angry, hurt, some sort of rage burning within him, but instead an exhausted want to understand and accept why she ran draped over him.

"I'm sorry Rex," she apologized hoarsely. "I was, am," she corrected herself, "so afraid."

"Of me?"

Her sapphire orbs finally met his. "Yes, you, how today may end, what tomorrow may bring and if the next few days will even come. If they do, how will we continue with each other, you a captain, me a Jedi?" As Rex opened his mouth to speak, Ahsoka didn't give him a chance to say a word. "But then after listening to some much needed words of wisdom from an outside voice it's finally beginning to dawn on me."

"What is it?" Rex throatily asked.

"I love you and I don't want to live a life without you. I don't to be another broken soul; I don't want you to be an empty shell. We've been both a pawn and a witness to that depression and I don't want to be a part of that darkness anymore." The girl sucked in a shaky breath. "I ran away and it took sitting alone in the dark to realize that you Rex, you are my light, my beacon."

"What if your beacon turns out to be just another clone captain Ahs'ika? What then? Will you run away again? Will you let the light burn out and run until you find another one?" Rex narrowed his eyes at her, as if he could peer right into her soul. Ahsoka quivered under his scrutinizing gaze.

"If you desire to be just a clone captain, then that will be my desire for you as well," Ahsoka barely whispered. "I will not run from you any longer."

Rex continued to look at her face. Each little line under her eyes, laugh lines by her full lips to the white tattoos that decorated her forehead and cheeks held an emotion that Rex could read: from worry to angst, joy to fear, acceptance and relief Rex knew this woman and wanted no other by his side.

"I don't know who I am, maybe that's why you really ran," Rex admitted. "Maybe you see the monster I can be or the little child that wants to flee. Maybe it's the captain that I really am or the man I want to be. I just don't know Ahs'ika and I am so tired of trying to chase down an identity."

Ahsoka slowly lifted her hand and rested it on the side of his face which now spouted a couple days' worth of stubble. As she grazed her hand feeling the grainy coarse hairs on his face, Ahsoka curled her hand around the back of his head bringing it down to her level so that their lips were only a breath away.

"You are Rex: man, best friend and lover to Ahsoka Tano," she captured his lips to his and for tonight, Rex was just that. Man, best friend and lover to Ahsoka Tano. Everything else disappeared.

* * *

><p><em>A short chapter-but it seemed like a good ending for it. <em>

_I want to thank everyone for their fantasitc and awesome reviews-you all make it worth writing! =) _

_Hope you conitinue to enjoy and your reviews are always welcome_

_More to come very soon! Cody/Thea angst next! _


	8. Chapter 8

_Hi All,_

_here is the next installment. Enjoy! Please review!_

* * *

><p>Thea entered the room, closing the door behind her and turned just as the ex-commander tossed himself onto the large bed. Still clad in the black armor it clanked as he twisted and turned. She could see that Cody was in discomfort as he shuffled to find a comfortable spot on the bed and winced whether from pinching himself from the tad too big of plates or the nasty looking black and blue bruise that shined on his face.<p>

"Do you want help out of that thing?" Thea asked a tad too casually, as if nothing was the bother.

Cody sat up quickly and scrunched up his face at her. "No," he answered defensively.

"I was only trying to be nice, no need to bite my head off Commander," Thea raised her hands in submission. "Do you want any more ice or a bacta patch for your hand or for that cherry bomb on your face?" She pointed toward the bruise.

Cody lightly touched the bruise and winced. Yes he wanted ice and bacta, but he would not admit to anyone that this current pain was holding back the flooding emotions threatening to break down the dam he had built. For now this pain would hold them at bay for a little bit longer. _How much longer?_

"Well do you?" Thea prodded. Cody closely examined the woman that had followed him into his room and now was bothering him. Of medium height, red hair he had only seen when troopers had dyed it and was not completely convinced she hadn't done so herself, along with deep endless dark eyes with a very unattractive jagged scar that covered her once pretty face, Cody continued to scowl skeptically at her. Why was she trying to help and be friendly with him?

"No," he answered shortly again.

Thea rested herself against the wall and folded her arms under her breasts. Cody couldn't help notice how they slightly rose showing off their nicely shape. Shaking his head, he snarled to himself to keep such thoughts tucked away and never to return. They were only meant for one person and that person was dead.

"What's your story, Commander?" Thea asked. "What's with the stealth armor and bad attitude toward your brothers?"

Cody raised a surprised brow at the fact that this woman recognized the type of armor he was wearing. "You can stop calling me commander, I haven't been one for quite some time," he replied tersely.

"You know, your friend said the same thing about being a captain," Thea pushed herself off the wall and walked over to the bed, making herself a spot next to Cody who clearly looked uncomfortable.

"What are you doing? I can hurt you, you know." He didn't like the nearness and feelings she brought to and into him. He had fought and conquered them long ago or at least he thought he had.

"You wouldn't be the first," Thea sounded…disappointed to his ears. Disappointed in what exactly? That he wasn't trying to make a move on her or that he had suggested that he would do something? _Kriff, military life was much easier to figure out than any single woman on any particular day!_ Cody gave out a hiss of air through his teeth, sending his already tousled hair in all sorts of directions.

"What do you want?" Cody barked. He was sore; the throbbing in both his hand and face had escalated to the point where he was ready to hurt someone or something just to take his mind off of his misery. He was hot and sweaty from being in the one piece body glove and heavy armor for longer than he ever wished to be in and wanted nothing more to strip out of it, but not in front of this woman. Scars that he was unwilling to show tattooed over his body replaying ungodly memories that he so wished he could forget and did not need a million questions from a complete stranger asking him about them.

Thea shrugged her shoulders. "What do _you _want?" She threw back at him. Only one other person had asked him that question.

* * *

><p>It was against every regulation in both of their codes. He was supposed to be sleeping, readying his strength and energy for another mission with General Kenobi and the 212th Attack Battalion, but he had promised to see her. Cody could get a court martial for sneaking out of the barracks and that was the very least of his concerns. His destination was the Jedi Temple, specifically Jedi Offee's room. It wasn't unusual for troopers to be seen in the temple especially of late, Cody figured dressed in his armor no one would give him a second glance at least until he got to her room.<p>

Not only was he risking a court martial, but perhaps a more severe punishment for abandoning and going against his command for a relationship, especially with a Jedi. _She's more than a Jedi; she's my girl, my love, my soul. _Some would laugh right in Cody's face if he ever confessed that. _What's a soul?_ They would mock. _Clones have no soul!_

"But I do," Cody mumbled as he made his way toward the turbo lift where on the ninth floor and midway in she awaited his arrival.

On the outside, Cody looked like the calm, cool and collected clone solider, on the inside he was anything but calm. His stomach fluttered, his skin was clammy despite the body regulator that was installed in his armor and his heart was beating a mile a minute. Thank goodness for a voice modifier because if he had to talk, it would have been several octaves too high.

The turbo-lift door open and just as Cody was about to step inside when the person who he would have least like to have seen stood in front of him.

"Cody?" General Kenobi raised surprised golden brows at his commander. This was the most unlikely place he would have seen Cody especially since he was supposed to be in the barracks sleeping or at least prepping for the upcoming mission. "What are you doing here?"

"I couldn't sleep sir," Cody hated to lie to his general. He and Obi Wan had a great working relationship, he had the utmost respect and honor for the Jedi Master and would lay down his life for the man, but right now he stood in the way to the one person who meant more to him than breathing itself. "I thought I would do a perimeter search and make sure those new shinny's that were assigned to the temple are doing their jobs right."

Kenobi looked at his commander blankly and Cody couldn't tell if he bought the story or not. Sometimes the Jedi Master was too hard to read. "Don't you think that's something the 501st or Coruscant Guard is more suited to do?"

_Kest, he's not buying it._ "Yes sir," Cody said and wanted to stamp his foot in frustration. So close but so far away.

Kenobi continued to stare at Cody's visor as if he could see right through the T-shape. Sometimes Cody swore he could. _Do you know why I am really here General? Do you know I am in love with one of your Padawans? How would you feel about that? Can you feel emotions like love? I can. _

"Make sure you get some sleep before the mission tomorrow Cody," Kenobi gave Cody a polite nod and exited the turbo-lift. Cody hastily entered and pressed the ninth floor button, but not before watching the Jedi's retreating back. _So odd…_

The lift quickly got him up to the floor and he walk/jogged toward her door. Heart practically thumping against his armor, Cody straightened his back as if he was standing in a lineup and knocked gently on her door. The door slightly opened to reveal a soft blue/green luminescent silhouetting around her.

Barriss Offee peered ever so slightly out her door and as she instantly recognized the presence outside she grabbed his plated arm and brought him inside. Cody had no resistance toward her pull and walked easily inside. He began to take off his plates, beginning with his helmet and that's as far as he got before her silky lips descended on his much rougher ones. Barriss never complained when his lips were chapped or blistered from past missions, though Cody tried to make them soft just for her.

The taste of her was sheer heavenly bliss and he wanted nothing more to stay in this spot, this point with her forever. The need for air was growing and she was the one to break from him.

"Hi," a dimpled smile blossoming over her speckled face. Her olive green skin brightened, contrasting with her dark freckles that ran under her eyes and over the bridge of her nose. Cody wanted to kiss every one of them.

"Hi yourself," Cody's voice was deep and thick and he pressed her tightly against him.

"I'm glad you made it."

"Me too, though I ran into General Kenobi before I got into the turbo-lift." The smile disappeared from Barriss's lips and a troubled expression replaced it.

"Does he suspect something?" She asked worriedly.

"He found it odd that I was at the temple, but I don't think he suspects anything between you and me." A little sigh of relief breathed through her lips. "Barriss, what would you do if we were found out?"

Again, she looked at him with confusion and worry. "No one can know Cody and you know that."

"I know, but if something was to happen and they did find out, what would you do?" Cody dreaded the answer but he had to know, he had to know now. Times were changing and Barriss was the only constant foundation in his life right now. The only thing that gave him hope toward his future.

"As much as the Code is engrained into me Cody," she began delicately. Cody bowed his head, looking down at the stale gray carpet that covered her floor. _I should have known she would never really leave the Order. No matter how much she said she loved me, the Jedi are more important. _

"I understand," he faintly said.

"Understand what?" She asked confused.

"That you would stay with the Order instead of a measly clone solider."

"Cody!" She grabbed his chin and made him look at her, which was for him still looking down since he was a good head taller than her. "Let me finish," she said softer this time, but the firmness was still there. "The Code is ingrained into me which would make a falling out even harder, but I have learned also that there is more to life than just a code. Don't you realize the love we have built, the trust we have earned with each other and the life we will have together someday? Cody, I want that more than anything with you."

Cody could hardly believe his ears. Barriss, his Barriss just told him that she wanted to have a life with him! Him, Cody, CC-2224 clone commander and warrior of the Galactic Republic. She would actually choose him over the Order.

"Cody," Barriss's hand moved from his chin to his cheek, gently stroking his skin as if he were a baby nerf, "The time is not right and you know it. Someday, we can shout our love from the tallest buildings on Coruscant. Hopefully the war will be over and maybe before Hoth melts the Jedi Masters will learn to accept relationships as well."

"I'm not going to hold my breath," Cody mumbled.

"Neither am I, my dear, but you do understand don't you? For your safety neither one of us can be exposed in a relationship."

"For your safety as well," Cody added. He couldn't fathom what he would do if anything were to happen to her.

"Yes, well, Cody please tell me you understand," Barriss slightly begged him. Her blue eyes shimmered at him and he couldn't deny her any longer.

"I understand," He murmured against her forehead before tenderly placing kisses on it. "What if the war never ends Barriss or the Order falls?"

Barriss set back in his arms and looked at him baffled once again. "I thought you just told me you understood?"

"I do, from that point of view," Cody said.

"All wars come to an end someday Cody. Either one side is left standing or nothing at all." She rested her head against his armored chest as he wrapped her once again in a tight embrace.

"Kind of a morbid thought," He groused.

"It's real. And the Order, well I would hope to see it stand for centuries on end."

"You sound like it won't," Cody had never heard a Jedi talk in such a way and it was mind boggling. A Jedi not believing that their lively hood wouldn't be there for them forever?

"Times do change, I just hope for the better." Cody should have taken that as a warning but dismissed the tiny warning bells. Barriss pushed off of him and began to help Cody take off the armor. He watched with amusement as she fumbled with a few of the trickier latches. She seemed to go from a confident, wise Jedi to an insecure young woman. Cody wasn't a pro at woman's emotions, but Barriss seemed flustered suddenly, her skin taking on even a lighter glow than when she first kissed him and in the sapphire light, it almost gave her an emerald hue.

"Cody, what do you want?" She asked unexpectedly.

"What?" He turned his neck so he could try and see her as she popped the buckles of his utility belt from behind him. It dropped ungracefully to the floor. His belt, arm and shoulder plates were off, leaving him with his chest/body and leg armor. _Wait, what's going on, what are we doing?_ If he wasn't nervous before, he was now.

Barriss and Cody had never gone further than kissing and lying together in bed. He would be fully clad in his body suit and she in either her Jedi clothes or some sort of night garment. But something in the way she looked at him was different; the way she asked him what he wanted. _What do I want? _

"I asked you what you wanted." She was standing in front of him again and started to untie her hair. The long, dark and wavy locks cascaded down her back and shoulders looking like a black curtain. Cody longed to run his fingers in the silky tresses. He quickly tossed his gloves, not caring where they landed and stepped closer to her, taking some of her hair and twining it between his fingers.

"I want…" he started.

"Yes?" she whispered and reached to undo the rest of his body plate. She shivered at the uncontrolled emotions he was projecting toward her: love, apprehension, excitement, uncertainty. The armor crashed to the ground and Cody kicked it out of the way. Now only in his body glove with his thigh and calf armor remaining, the air around them felt a lot different. More intimate as if their relationship was about to take a step into the deep end and they would never be able to return from it.

"I want…you Barriss. I want you to be mine and only mine," huskily Cody panted and he once again captured her lips against his. It was a selfish request, he knew that, but if that's the one thing he could only have in the universe, well that's what he wanted.

She could feel his tongue battle for dominance in her mouth and with a brief front, she submitted to him, melting; molding against him. Barriss could feel his heartbeat and warmness radiating onto her and into her. A moan vibrated through her throat and into Cody's. Hearing his deep, guttural growl sent her pulse racing with excited anticipation.

She soon felt herself being pushed backwards and into her dimly lit bed room, both never breaking their incredible kiss. Barriss almost believed if they did, this dream would come to an end.

Air once again becoming a must, they broke a part, not before Barriss whispered his name into his mouth. Hearing her say his name was like a whimsical tune fluttering in the breeze bringing only delight into his heart. Cody untangled himself from her and finished taking off the rest of any armor so that he could feel the soft material of her night gown and silkiness of her skin.

He had dreamed many dreams of them tangled in the sheets together, feeling her velveteen body under his as she quivered and wreathed around him in pleasure, pleasure that he had brought to her. Cody dreamed of her crying out his name in pure ecstasy as they made endless love. Neither one had experienced in such wonderful affairs, both promising to wait for one other and the right moment, Cody stood before the young Jedi knight confident that this was the moment. He was nervous, but not afraid. Excited, but willing to go as slow as needed and make sure she was comfortable. Above all, her needs were first.

"And you shall my love," Barriss loving said, "heart and soul."

* * *

><p>Cody remembered the night, he could never forget. She had given him something so very special and would keep the small flame burning within his darkened heart. At the mere thought of making love to Barriss Offee made him quiver with sensations that only she could bring to him and only meant for her. His body also responded in the most unfortunate way, making the already uncomfortable armor that much more unpleasant in the nether region.<p>

Cody groaned in misery and feeling his bed slightly shift he turned to see that his company still was beside him. _Great._

Seeing the commander clearly uncomfortable, though Thea wasn't sure if it really was from his injuries or from something else, she decided to take the initiative and reached for the belt buckle to unlatch it. With lightening quick reflexes that were bred into him, Cody grabbed her wrist before she could touch his belt.

"What are you doing?" He bellowed.

"You don't look too comfortable, thought I was helping," Thea jerked her arm back, but Cody wouldn't let go. He pierced her with a deadly glare, yet Thea didn't back down. He finally threw her arm back at her and stood up, never breaking the eye contact. Without the use of his left hand, Cody was jerky in his movements as he fumbled with the fixtures of his armor. Thea furrowed her golden-red brows in worry and confusion as she watched the irate man toil and toss down the heavy pieces of plated armor, even flinching a bit as they thumped down on the floor.

_Run Thea. Get out of the room. You pushed him too far, get out now…_The grating little voice warned Thea chose to disregard it.

"Cody, stop." She told him, but he ignored her, in fact it only made him work more furiously on the closures. Frustrated that he couldn't get some of them open with only one hand, he used his injured one and ground his teeth as he could feel the fresh stiches pull and break away. "Stop!" She said louder as she saw his bandaged begin to stain red. Thea once again reached for him, but Cody deflected and pushed her away causing her to fall back onto the bed.

Finally when all the pieces were off and he was only standing in his body suit and black plated boots; breaths coming in shallow gasps, Cody's eyes were wild as he looked down upon her. The bandage was now completely red and crimson drops fell to the floor.

In two steps he was standing imposingly over her. Thea rolled her eyes upward and gulped. Before either one knew what was happening Cody was upon Thea, pinning her beneath his body, her arms above her head and her wrists bound in his hands. She squeezed her brown eyes shut as his hot breath steamed over her cheek.

"All I have to do is scream," she whispered hoarsely. She craned her eyes open and turned her head to face him.

"Do it," he dared. Thea pursed her lips tightly shut. She should scream for help. She knew that Fives, Rex any of the Mandos would come busting down the door to aid in her rescue, but for some reason, while looking into his ember eyes, Thea saw that this man would not really hurt her. Cody needed help, perhaps some way she could help heal his deep seated pain and if she were to scream he would be a dead man. And a dead man could no longer forgive or be forgiven of deeds of the past or present.

"Do you feel that?" Cody ground his hips against her body and she could clearly feel his arousal. Thea gasped and pushed against his hands. It only brought her closer it him, her breasts caressing his chest. _Please Cody, don't. You are not this evil; you are not like the others. _He pressed himself harder onto her, pushing them deeper into the mattress. His grip tightened even more on her wrists and Thea knew that there would be bruises later.

Shuttering, Thea nodded. "Do you think you did this to me?" Cody asked in almost a nefarious way.

"I hope not." She growled.

"You couldn't," he seethed. "You cannot do anything for me. You are not Barriss."

Cody let go of her wrists and sat up. Thea continued to lie on the mattress for a few moments, catching her breath and trying to comprehend what had just happened. She slowly sat up, ran a hand through her disheveled hair and turned a scathing look to Cody.

"And you are not Echo." With that, she fled from his room.

* * *

><p><em>So a pretty dark Cody and Thea chapter. Poor Cody, he's so deep in the darkness will he ever find the light again? <em>

_Lots more to come stay tuned! _

_Thank you to everyone who has read and reviewed so far! Thank you so much for your support! _


	9. Chapter 9

Their moment was broken from the startling sound of the loud thump above their heads and following with complete silence; Rex, Ahsoka and with no surprise to Rex, Fives reappeared in the dining room and were up the staircase within a minute, skipping steps and clipping each other's heals. They ignored the curious and baffled stares of the other occupants of the home as they began to file out or stand in their doorways wondering what the kriff was going on at this unholy hour.

Before Rex had a chance to knock and open Cody's door, Thea tore out with the door crashing right behind her and plowed into Rex. He grunted as the wind was pushed out of him and steadied the woman in front of him as her feet almost gave out under her. As if the collision had no effect on Thea, she frantically shoved against Rex to get by and for him to let her go.

"Thea," Fives called from behind Rex, hoping to snap her out of her wild daze, "you're okay."

She looked upon Rex then to Fives and finally settling upon Ahsoka, but only an untamed storm brewed within the auburn depths. "Thea?" Ahsoka hesitantly asked. The Jedi stepped around Rex and took the pilot's cold and clammy wrist into hers. She could feel her pulse racing and feral ferocity radiate off her. Ahsoka noticed the red welts forming on the woman's milky white skin. With a shriek that startled Rex, Ahsoka and Fives, Thea jerked her hand away from Ahsoka and turned reproaching eyes toward Fives. Fives physically blanched from her condemning glower.

"It's your fault," she growled through gritted teeth and pointed a shaky finger at him. Thea narrowed her eyes, pupils almost turning into slits; giving her a look that of a predator having a lock on her prey. Even as big, strong, lethal soldiers, Rex and Fives felt the shivers of trepidation go down their backs.

"It's your fault," she repeated again. "You'll never be as good as him. Not you," she then turned accusingly to face Rex and jabbed a finger in his chest, "not you," Thea twisted around to confront those who stood in their doorways watching the drama unfold, "Or any of you. You may have _his _face, but you'll never be Echo!"

"Thea!" Ahsoka cried out to her new friend, or thought was her friend, but fell upon deaf ears as Thea shoved her way passed a stunned Fives and Rex and fled down the staircase. With her own fury and distress blinding her, Thea made it to the bottom floor flew into another body, but this time she didn't get passed him.

"Let go!" She squealed.

"Shh," he said calmly, placing a hand at her temple. Thea's body instantly went unconscious into his arms.

Ahsoka, Rex and Fives ran over to the banister and peered down to see Kal Skirata softly murmuring to the unfamiliar man who had the limp body of Thea in his arms then turn away from all of them and disappear around the corner.

"Where are you taking her?" Ahsoka demanded as she ran back down the stairs, but stopped midway when Skirata held up his hand.

"Your pilot will come to no harm, you should know that by now young Jedi," Skirata lightly admonished and Ahsoka's skin turned a light red-orange from her outburst. "We have many people in this household, some of which are expecting and already in an uncomfortable state," Skirata looked pointedly at Fives, who also looked embarrassed, "they need their rest as well as the other occupants. Whether they are resting or not, we have brought an end to the madness for the night and the remainder will be dealt with soon enough."

Skirata was firm, but not callous. He cared deeply for his boys, their wives and soon to be grandchildren. They came first. But he also cared for those who desperately needed help; he knew it was his weakness in the end and especially when it came to the clone boys.

"Fives," He kept his stare on Ahsoka, who continue to look nervously at him.

"Sir?" Fives answered hesitantly.

"Go back to your wife. Tomorrow is a new day with new issues. Your attention should be on her." Skirata considerately instructed. Without another word, Fives pushed off the banister and went down the steps. He slipped by Ahsoka and with a pat on the shoulder as he passed by the aliit leader; Fives also disappeared to his room.

"Rex," Skirata waited for the Captain's attention. "Tomorrow my boy. Don't go in there tonight."

Rex furrowed his brows in confusion and frustration. "Why?" He needed answers from Cody. Why would he want to wait now? He was skilled in interrogation and eventually could get what he wanted from…_Oh kest. That's why._

Ahsoka could feel the realization from Rex even before it was plastered on his handsome face. Programmed by his makers to become the harden, vicious interrogator that many had not seen, Rex had relied on that aptitude to extract information from closed mouthed enemies. Only one other time he could recall he had ever used his _skills_ before Cody on a turn-coat named Slick. _You were right in more ways than one, Slick._

At the thought of Cody, Rex started to become physically sick. His face started to become ashen gray and was cold, so very cold. _Friends do not interrogate friends. Clone captains interrogate enemies. So what am I? _

Rex raised startled eyes and had not realized he had sunk to the ground with his back against the wall until he felt her soft hand against his cheek. Worried blue eyes looked into his and he grasped her hand into his, holding on to dear life. Without letting go of Ahsoka's hand, Rex slowly got back onto his feet and they made their way back down the stairs and stood in front of Skirata.

"We all have demons to face," the older Mando looked at the pair. "Who you face them with will determine how you will rid of them." Skirata licked his dry lips and took a small breath. He closed his eyes momentarily and reopened them. Ahsoka noticing the small scars on his chiseled face, lines around his tired, but wizened eyes and mouth spoke more to her about the experience, knowledge and understanding this man had than any Jedi she had ever met. Even more than her former master and perhaps if Anakin had this he would not have turned.

"Jorso'ran kando a tome. Do both of you understand what that means?" Skirata asked. When Rex and Ahsoka shook their heads, he continued, "It's a verse in a song called _Vode An._ It was created for you and your brothers Rex, but this particular verse applies to both of you. It means, "We shall bear its weight together." Bear its weight together; do you know what that means?" Again, they shook their heads. "It means that neither one of you should carry a burden so heavy that you collapse. You are only as strong as the next member. If you ever want to be more, if you ever want to have more, then you mustn't be selfish even if it is a personal burden. Pull your heads out of your shebs and share." Getting the jest of what shebs meant, Ahsoka and Rex slightly smiled; Skirata returning it. He turned to leave as well until Ahsoka stopped him.

"What about Thea? What if she awakens during the night?" she asked concerned.

"She is in the most trusted hands, little Jedi. Bar'ika is watching over her," Skirata assured. Sensing more questions from Ahsoka, Skirata held up a gloved hand again silencing her. "Your questions will be answered in the morning, I promise. You will know if your friend is awake," he tapped the side of his head, acknowledging the Force within her.

"Sir, what of Cody?" Rex asked.

"He can't leave without anyone of us knowing. We will know if he attempts otherwise."

"That's not what I meant," Rex tried to keep the irritation out of his voice, but some seeped out.

"I know lad," Skirata patiently said. "You will talk with him in the morning. He will answer you." The mando turned once again to leave. Rex took a step forward, but Ahsoka squeezed his hand and he halted.

"Sir, do you think even the most dammed are redeemable?"

Skirata stopped, but did not turn around. "If they weren't, then why are we here?"

* * *

><p>Fives sat on the end of his bed, back hunched and face buried in his hands. He was exhausted, but could not fall asleep. Thea's scornful words replayed hauntingly over and over in his mind. <em>It's your fault. You'll never be as good as him.<em>

"Echo I'm sorry my brother. It should have been me, not you." He mumbled mournfully.

"Fives?" Bella's celestial voice made the former ARC peer up from his hands and over at his lovely wife. In his eyes, being pregnant gave her a heavenly glow about her. _She always has a heavenly glow because she is an angel, my angel. _

"Thea's right," he whispered.

"About what?" Bella sat up as much as she could and looked at him puzzled.

"It was all my fault that Echo died. I should have tried harder to stop him from running to that ship."

"Oh Fives please don't do this," Bella whimpered softly. "Don't let Echo's death be in vain because you blame yourself."

"Bella, you don't understand. If I just tried a little harder instead of sitting there like a shell-shocked cadet, I could have grabbed his arm, leg, jumped on his back and tackled him to the ground and prevented a good man from throwing his life away. It'll always be my fault and I can't bring him back for her."

"Fives look at me right now," Bella said sternly. She waited until his golden-brown grief-stricken eyes met hers. "He didn't," Bella insisted. "He may have died, but he was never throwing it away. He sacrificed his life so that his brother, you, could thrive. Thrive by living Fives, thrive by remembering his good name and helping Thea realize that she needs to live too and not die with just a memory. He would never want his brother, his bond brother blaming himself for his death."

Overwhelmed by the night's events, accusations and revolutions, Fives maneuvered his body so that he was now lying next to his wife, propping his head up with one arm and his other hand gently stroking her round, bulging belly. "I don't know what I would do without you, my sweet Bella," he continued adoringly to gaze at her stomach, his warm hand now resting flat on the top of her stomach, feeling their daughter give a small kick. "You are my rhyme and reason."

Running her elegant fingers through his smooth mane, she smiled both sadly and fondly at her husband. The guilt of Echo's death would always weigh heavily on his shoulders and hopefully one day he would realize the gift that his brother had given him. Echo had allowed Fives to look beyond the horizon and have a future, the proof of that with the impending birth of their child.

"We haven't a name for her yet," Fives was almost purring under Bella's ministrations. Bella bit the bottom of her lip and quit stroking his hair. Fives looked up curiously and saw her hesitation. "What is it?"

"Well, I don't know if you'll like this especially with everything going on. I've been thinking about it for a while…" Bella trailed off.

Fives had to know now. "Tell me," he urged. Bella twisted her lips and he pressed. "Come on, please."

"Well, I was thinking we'd call her Echo, but with a K instead of a C. It'd be unique but still in memory of her uncle." Fives eyes were wide and unmoving. "I'm sorry Fives, it was a bad idea." Bella instantly regretted mentioning the idea.

In response Fives captured her luscious lips to his for a passion filled kiss. When they broke, both were left breathless and panting for air.

"I love it. It's perfect, she's perfect. You're perfect," he gasped and then kissed her again.

When they broke for a second time, Fives and Bella laid back down arms wrapped around each other; Fives both tenderly and protectively had one arm around her waist. For the rest of the night's hours, they were blissfully aware of only two things: the love for each other and little Ekho.

* * *

><p><em>A bit lighter than the last chapter. Thought everyone could use a breath and some sleep ;)<em>

_Thank you to **Lalgoa, Queen, Jedi-Padawan 14, Sachariah, Janizary, Jess Marylin, Elle **and everyone else who has taken the time to read and review this story. You all make it worth writing. _

_More to come very soon! Enjoy! Reviews are always welcome. _


	10. Chapter 10

Cody lay prone on his bed, arms sprawled out on either side of him and his wounded, throbbing hand still wrapped in the bloodied gauze now had leaked and stained his sheets. He paid no mind as the crimson mark expanded as his thoughts were centered on the redheaded pilot and the angst and trepidation that he had instilled into her.

_I told her I didn't want her help. It's her fault she didn't listen. Only Barriss understood me. Only Barriss could love me. Only I could love Barriss, she is dead and my sense of humanity is buried along with her. _

At the mere thought of Barriss, Cody's gut clenched and twisted and bile rose to his throat. Ignoring his protesting body, he quickly got up and ran to the refresher empting the contents of his stomach into the toilet. After a few dry heaves, Cody flushed the toilet and slid down to the ground, resting the side of his face against the cool porcelain wall. He braced his cut hand unconsciously against the wall and when he opened his eyes, the ruby red blood had left a trail. Cody moved his hand, leaving behind his print. He stared at it for a good long moment before giving out a curse as to why he was even in the bathroom in the first place.

Standing up on wobbly feet, he walked over to the little sink and removed the bloodied rags, tossing them carelessly onto the ground. Turing on the facet he let the cool water run over the deep cut, cringing and hissing as it stung. Only two stiches remained in his mangled hand and wondered if that Mando doctor would help him repair his hand or tell him to usen'ye (go away). He had told them enough to do so; he wouldn't be surprised if their tolerance for him had run out.

But wasn't that what he wanted? Didn't he want to die? Wouldn't that reunite him with Barriss sooner? _If so, why haven't I done it? Because…because I am a coward that's why._

Cody looked at himself in the mirror and scowled deeply at what he saw. Healthy tanned skin had now gone ashen. Covered in grime, dirt, sweat and who knows what else, Cody had let his personal hygiene fall below standards, something he had prided himself on even during war. It kept him healthy and happy especially when Barriss would grin and immerse herself in his scent.

His dark hair was disheveled; looking like he had stuck it in an electrical socket and a few lighter strands appeared along his temple. He had the beginnings of a beard on his face, something that he never had or wanted. Running his non-injured hand over the scratchy stubble, Cody looked side to side in the mirror. It was dark with a few colors of gray sneaking in. Perhaps that's why he never wanted it. It was his constant biological clock, letting him know that age and time would catch up to him sooner than later.

Pooling some of the cool liquid into his non injured palm, he splashed it on his dry skin and rubbed it into his weary eyes. Blinking several times, he peered into the mirror again. _Still the same man. _His eyes held deep, dark and tired circles under them. The now black bruise on his face didn't help the enhancement any. _Damn it Rex. Thanks a lot. _Cody knew he had no one to blame but himself. He gingerly touched the bags under his eyes and then his sore cheek. Cody closed his eyes as a spike of agony made him pause. _I deserve every bit of pain that comes my way. I couldn't save her, for this, I must suffer. I need to suffer. How can I forget when I cannot forgive? I cannot let go, maybe I don't want to._

Cody let out a long, shaky sigh and turned off the water. The wound continued to bleed, but not as profusely. He stared at it as the little drops dripped into the basin. _"Cody, stop!" _He heard her cry to him.

His eyes shot up and forward into the mirror again. _"All I have to do is scream."_ But she didn't. Why?

"_Do it," _Cody shuttered at the malicious way he felt toward her at that moment. He had never felt any ill will toward any woman that way. Not even during Order 66. He could feel her quiver under him; practically feel the rage and furry build, but also empathy. _Empathy? For me?_

"_You are not Barriss." _No she was not Barriss, no one could be her. She was his heart, soul; his reason to get up from his bunk in the morning, to charge out into the battlefield and hopefully make it back to see her glistening blue eyes. She was his reason to keep on living.

But this woman, this fierce pyro flower had blazed into his world and set it on fire. And he didn't know how to put the inferno out.

The fear in her eyes, the tremble in her body, he was sure he had over done it, but she had sat up, slightly composed herself and turned lethal eyes onto him. _"And you are not Echo," _she had spurned before running out.

No, he was not Echo, nor would he ever be Echo. Echo, the young clone trooper who he and Rex had promoted along with Fives to ARC troopers was honorable, brave and noble. Echo had left his legacy be it a short one, on everyone he had ever knew and probably if he had survived would have been one of the greats, along with his brother. Echo was loved, well loved by a woman who carried a burden of great suffering of his death.

His dull eyes suddenly taking on a shine, widened. _I am not alone. _Groaning in misery, Cody leaned his forehead against the mirror and took a deep breath. _What have I done? _

Deciding he couldn't do anything tonight, Cody pushed himself away from the mirror and looked around for a razor and soap. Sagging with a tiny bit of relief he was grateful that when this house was designed and bedrooms filled, they made them for men. In the small cabinet, Cody found a razor and soap.

He quickly soaped up his face, careful of his bruise and began to remove the scruff. Wincing as he skimmed over the "cherry bomb" as the pilot had called it, Cody finished and rinsed off. Turning on the water in the shower, he waited until it began to warm up. He looked one more time into the mirror, staring at his clean and shaven face.

_What do I want? Maybe I want to learn how to be a friend and brother again._ With that, Cody stepped into the shower and let the warm, steaming water run over his battered body, the first start to washing away his foul past.

* * *

><p>It was times like these when Bardan Jusik was both thankful and cursed his Force abilities. Even in the early hours of the morning as he sat in the old wooden chair next to the bed with the distraught pilot, he watched as she twisted her scared face in a tormented grimace, Jusik once again gently laid two fingers on her temple to calm the torrent dreams that were plaguing her. It wasn't the first time he had to ease her distress and it wouldn't be the last, but hoped that at some point she would find some sort of peace.<p>

Jusik was thankful that he was able to ease her pain even if it was just a little bit, but with such ability also came the consequences. With each disturbance she had, he sought a little place in her mind where the demons could not reach. He had to endure the darkness and gasped as she unconsciously clamped onto him, almost begging for his spark never to leave her mind. He had soothed her like a child in need of assurance from her father that the monsters wouldn't hurt her and as he began to withdraw from her, she tried to wrap herself around him once again.

It was something that Jusik had never experienced before, though intriguing, it was also frightening and a bit suffocating. Each time he went in, he wasn't sure if he was going to drown as she tried to coil around him like a life preserver.

Jusik lifted his hand from her forehead just as Thea muttered something incoherently. He studied her face, eyes trailing the long, jagged scar that started from somewhere on top of her head and ran across her face to the bridge of her nose and finally ended on the other side of her jaw. However she got it had to have been painful with the burden of carrying the memory of it as well. Despite the scar, she was an attractive looking woman, skin as fair as any Alderaanian porcelain and fiery red hair that was a stark contrast, especially fanned out against the plain white pillow.

Thea jerked her head to the side causing pieces of her hair to stick to the side of her pale face. Jusik reached to remove the strands, but she groaned and rolled to her right side, tucking one hand under her head and the other arm was straight out, limp over the side of the bed.

Because of the movement, the sleeve of her flight suit rolled up a tad exposing some of her wrist which he could visibly see the angry red welts. Jusik felt an unusual anger toward the man who had did this to the pilot, but called upon his old training to calm him. Commander Cody, also a lost and hounded soul, in dire need of help wouldn't have done this if he was in the right mind. Not that Jusik condoned such abuse to anyone especially women, but both of them were here for a reason.

Jusik gently as he could took her wrist and laid her hand into his larger one and poured healing energies into the welt. Again she began to mumble and this time he could make out what she was saying.

"Echo," she started in a soft whisper, "Echo I love you too."

_Keep dreaming of him,_ Jusik hoped as he gently stoked her wrist with his calloused fingers.

"Echo," she began to whimper. "Echo, why did you leave me?" There was a pause and Jusik watched with fascination as it looked like she was having a conversation with nothing but air. Her eyes pinched in agitation and for a moment Jusik was tempted to use the Force to once again calm her, but she relaxed. "They aren't you Echo. Please come back." A single tear escaped her closed eye and rolled down her pearl-colored cheek, dripping onto her flight suit.

With a sudden ferocity that even startled Jusik, she lurched from laying down into a disoriented upright position. Thea looked around wildly and when her senses came to her, she felt a slight pressure on her wrist. Glancing down, she saw it encased in someone's grip. Remembering her recent event with Cody, she gasped and jerked her arm back to free herself.

"Easy there," a soothing baritone caressed her ears and it had the desired effect on her. Thea relaxed and analyzed her situation.

"You can let go now," She stared unwaveringly into his own dark brown eyes, almost as if she was issuing a challenge to him.

Jusik slowly released her wrist and she placed her hand in front of her, then shifting herself so that she was sitting with her legs folded, but blanket still covering her lower section. She looked around the room and then end back on him.

"Who are you?" She asked wearily and eyed him cautiously.

"Do you remember what happened?" He replied, sitting back into his chair.

Thea toyed with her bottom lip, Jusik finding himself watching and then admonished himself mentally to pay attention. "Yes," she replied shortly.

"Do you want to talk about it?"

"No. I don't even know who you are." She retorted guardedly.

"I am Bardan Jusik, former Jedi Knight, member of Clan Skirata, brother to all members of this home and uncle," He answered.

"Quite a title," Thea retorted.

"They are an honor," he replied.

"What am I doing in here? Did you put me in here?"

"Yes, Thea I did," he answered calmly. Before she could reply, he continued, "You're friends are resting safely as well."

"They aren't my friends," she snarled. "I'm just their pilot."

"Yet you care about then," he said gently.

Thea again bit the bottom of her lip and pressed her teeth together. She would be lying to herself if she didn't say she cared about the young Togruta and even her captain. But what about that crazy, tormented, lost commander? Why did she try and help him? She didn't know the man, even before Order 66 she only heard talks about him and never worked or flew with him personally. What did she owe the man?

The way that he held her down, pressed himself into her, ground his hips into hers had terrified her to no ends. His spiteful voice, his heated breath slithering onto her face and neck only made her want to scream, but his eyes told a different story. They cried for her to help; for release of their dungeon.

"_You are not Barriss,"_ he had ground out.

Thea heard her name being called and shook her head out of the trance she was in to look at the rugged Jedi-turned mando. "What?" She dazedly asked. She realized her wrists didn't hurt nearly as bad as she thought they should. Looking down, the red welts were a very dull pink.

"I said, I tried to heal them as much as I could before you woke up," Jusik almost sounded apologetic.

"Oh, uh thank you," she awkwardly said.

"You have been having some vivid nightmares."

"How do you…" she trailed off when she recalled him saying that he was a former Jedi knight. "Oh yeah. Listen, I think I should leave now. Thanks for the quick fix," she flicked her wrists showing that they weren't sore and started to scoot off the bed, sheet dragging behind her, "but I need to leave."

"Wait," Jusik put a halting hand on her shoulder, feeling her tense under his grip. "Perhaps you should stay."

"Why? I've just caused a bunch of hate and discontent, why would I want to stay?" Thea wanted to stay though. She wanted her answers, wanted to help her friend, even though she proclaimed them not to be her friends; it was just easier to keep everyone at a distance. She wanted to heal; she wanted the darkness to disappear. She wanted to feel free once again.

"Because you know it's the right thing to do," Jusik said empathetically.

Thea looked toward the door, her means of escape so close and closed her eyes. She scooted back onto the bed, lay down and wrapped the sheet up to her chin. As if somehow knowing he had helped her with her night terrors, she asked with almost child-like innocence, "what if the monsters come back while I'm asleep?"

"I won't let them. Sleep dreamlessly Thea," Jusik promised.

* * *

><p><em>Hi all-<em>

_not as rough as the last couple of chapters and both Thea and Cody seem to be coming to some revolutions. _

_Again, I want to thank everyone who has read and reviewed this story so far! I am thoroughly happy that you have enjoyed the read so far and I hope you continue to do so! =)_

_More to come very soon and as always, please lt me know what you think!_


	11. Chapter 11

_Hi All,_

_so here is the next chapter-the rating goes up for this one probably a T++ just warning you! _

_It's a Rex/Ahsoka for those who have been looking forward to reading about them. _

_Hope you enjoy and please review! _

* * *

><p>Earlier that night….<p>

Rex punched his pillow angrily before lying his body down onto the mattress and then drew the covers tightly up to his neck. Ahsoka watched from her side of the bed with puzzlement and curiosity.

"Rex?" Ahsoka reached out and lightly touched his shoulder and he tensed under her hand. _Please, not again, I thought we had worked past this._ "Rex, please talk to me."

Rex shifted his body so that he was facing the young Jedi. His golden-brown eyes actually held tears in them and it shook Ahsoka to the very core. "What's the matter?" She asked worriedly.

"That could have been you, Ahsoka," he said hoarsely. "That could have been you screaming at us, at me. And you would have been right; it would have been my fault." Ahsoka propped herself on her arm and furrowed her white brows at him.

"Rex, don't talk like that," She chided.

"I didn't stop my brothers from killing the Jedi, the Padawans or babies. For sith's sake Ahsoka, they were just babies." Rex blinked and shamed tears trickled down his golden skin and dampening his pillow. He swiped angrily at his face to rid of the trail and coughed to try and clear his throat, but the he still bristled. "And I held that gun to your head."

"We've been through this, Rex," Ahsoka tried to soothe; "I don't have to forgive you because there's nothing to forgive. I love you and always will."

"I don't just need forgiveness, I also need to find redemption," He muttered. "The first thing I thought after Thea was taken to her room was the need to interrogate Cody. What kind of man does that Ahsoka? I am neither man nor captain. What am I? What do I need to do to find out?" He drew in a long suffering sigh.

Ahsoka scooted nearer to him and took his face almost roughly between both of her hands. She planted a long, deep and passionate kiss on his lips and a low masculine growl reverberated from the depths of his throat. They barely parted from one another, close enough that they could feel their lips still touching each other, "Let go," she murmured.

And he did. Rex released the blanket that he had tightly covering him and tossed it down at his feet. He then took his arm and wrapped it around Ahsoka's slim waist pulling her under him, a small shrill squeak of surprise emitting from her mouth. Rex quickly hushed the squeak as he once more covered her lips with his. This kiss was much different from before. It was full of fervor, heat, release of angst energy. His hands, she loved his hands, they were coarse from the year and a half of farm work and years of being in the military yet he touched her with such adoration. They glided across her ribcage and she tried not to giggle.

He lifted himself up to peer down at her, raising a brow at the smirk on her mouth. "It tickles," she giggled.

"Noted and logged," Rex skimmed his lips across her jaw and down her elegant neck. He could hear the snort come from her but ignored it.

The seriousness of this moment returned as Ahsoka gasped when he brushed her in an extra sensitive spot between her breasts. Rex moved lower and lower, Ahsoka clutched the sheets tightly in her hands; her breathing becoming more erratic.

"Ahs'ika, I want to kiss you where you've never been kissed before," Rex's eyes were no longer brown, but black as the ebony night.

Did she hear him right? Was he really asking her if he could kiss her there? She trusted him and knew he would never do anything to hurt her so she found herself nodding. She couldn't formulate a comprehensive word as her breathing came in short and shallow puffs. Suddenly she felt his mouth there. Stars formulated before her eyes and the pressure began to build in her belly.

"Rex…" she panted. His hands caressed her lithe legs, up to her stomach. "Oh Rex," she moaned.

He looked up momentarily to see her eyes closed and head tilted back in undisguised pleasure. All at once he had to be with her, in her. He slid his body forward, bracing his both of his arms on either side of her head and whispered, "Look at me."

Her sapphire eyes glistened up at him, full of love and promise. Both groaned as he joined with her and stilled so that he would not lose the little control he still had over himself.

"Please," Ahsoka bucked her hips against his and it was more than Rex needed. In and out he set a chaotic tempo, bodies shuttering as they reached their critical peaks. Gasps, moans and whispers of ecstasy filled the room.

Ahsoka raked her hands across his back, gripping his shoulders as he rocked into her. He would bring her to new heights, unyielding in her and his release. He breathed her name over and over in her ear; soon she chanted his name along with him, cocooning him closer trying to fuse into him.

"Rex, be mine," she whispered.

Rex wasn't sure if he could answer, wasn't sure if his vocal cords would cooperate with him, but somehow he managed to utter back, "Forever and always." It was then the galaxy exploded before their very eyes. They came together: minds, hearts and very essences melding as one. His thoughts, fears, securities-everything that made Rex, Rex absorbed into Ahsoka and likewise for Rex.

They lay prone in that position for quite some time until Rex realized his weight may be squashing her. "Ahsoka," he waited for her now violet-turned eyes to look at him. She could both see and feel despite that the battle was not over. He could never truly be hers nor could she truly be his until he found himself, no matter how much they proclaimed their love for one another; but for tonight, as Ahsoka gently reached over and stroked his slick golden skin, forever and always would be a someday goal. At least she had today and right now.

* * *

><p>Ahsoka's heavy eyes flew open and quickly adjusted to the vast darkness of the room. She had felt the ripple through the Force and out of habit, she began to shield herself. Taking a shallow breath, Ahsoka calmed herself and carefully removed the wall. She could feel the soothing swells of the Force from a distance meant for a person in distress. It was like having a small candle lit and softly glowing so that there would no longer be darkness. It was both comforting and assuring.<p>

_Thea…_Ahsoka instantly thought of their pilot and the wild rampage she had. _"All your fault..." _She had screamed at poor Fives. Ahsoka only caught a small glimpse of the devastation that flooded Fives, until he composed himself. _It could have been you screaming at me and it would have been my fault."_ She remembered what Rex had said to her earlier. How the tears he had shed, how confused he was feeling; the fight he continued to battle. She wished she could fight it for him, but instead she would hold his hand and fight beside him.

"_Let go," _She had told him. He had, bringing them closer than ever. She had never experienced such love in her whole life. He was hers as much as she was his. Through thick and thin, they were bonded souls.

Sensing that everything was at peace for the moment, even Cody, Ahsoka relaxed and looked her sleeping partner that happened to have his face buried on her pillow. If she were to move an inch, her head would be on top of his. A little snore escaped from his lips, bringing a smile to hers.

The Mandalorian moon casted a lucent glow through their small window silhouetting Rex's body and Ahsoka found herself tracing his outline. Cocooned in the warm blanket and a strong arm wrapped almost possessively around her waist, Ahsoka carefully wiggled an arm free and lightly began to run her hand over his side.

Giving a small groan, Rex mumbled "I love you." Ahsoka's hand froze as he moved his body closer to hers, if that were possible. His grip on her tightened and he maneuvered his leg so that it was now leg draped over her hip, Ahsoka had to suppress the laughter that was building in her chest. She had become his "binky."

_Who would have thought the big strong Captain Rex needed a binky!_ The smile that formed on her face slowly turned into a frown. _That's exactly why he needs one. He isn't the captain of a renowned force any longer. He isn't a wayward spacer, a Mandalorian like Fives, or a famer like Cut. He is adrift young man unprepared for a life of uncivilized codes and wild, unregulated rules. Rex, oh Rex I am so sorry. I will be there to catch you if you fall as you have done for me and be at your side. I will guide you as you have guided me. _

Putting a light kiss on his forehead, Ahsoka snuggled deeper into him and closed her eyes, but not before whispering in her native language, "Í hvert skipti sem við stöndum frammi fyrir ótta okkar, fá okkur styrk, hugrekki og sjálfstraust í að gera." _I love you too Rexster._

* * *

><p><em>In case you are curious, the language is Icelandic and the quote means: "Every time we face our fear, we have the strength, courage and confidence in making."<em>

_I couldn't find any quotes in Togurti so I thought this would be a neat substitute. _

_Well, I hope you enjoyed this short chapter, LOTS more to come. _


	12. Chapter 12

_As always I own nothing. _

_Enjoy and please review!_

* * *

><p>Thea woke with something shining brightly in her eyes. She blinked several times to clear her vision, but the insistent light just would not go away. She raised her hands to shield her face and realized that this was not the florescent light from her ship, but from the sun glaring through the small window. <em>I am not on my ship, but in an unfamiliar room on an unfamiliar bed<em>. A soft snore to her right made her forget the pesky light and look over to see a man with his arms folded over his t and chin tucked into his chest resting in an old wooden chair next to her.

_Okay, don't panic Thea, remember…remember…_Yes, she began to recall what had happened last night and grimaced. She had gone up into a room with the broken and angry commander. _Should have been my first clue,_ Thea berated herself.

They had picked at each other and after his tolerance had reached its peak, Cody had her pinned under him, twisting her wrists until they burned and bruised. What was worse she recalled him grounding himself against her and it took all of her self-control not to knee him in the groin. Maybe it would have been better if she had. They had parted but not before one last insult to each other.

"_You think you did this to me? You cannot do anything for me. You are not Barriss," _he snarled.

"_And you are not Echo," _she snapped back and ran. _Like a coward,_ Thea snorted but quickly silenced herself as the man next to her shift for a more comfortable position. He had told her his name. _Bardan Jusik._ He had stayed with her all night and kept the night terrors at bay. _Like a prince in shining armor. If only they really existed. _

Thea looked over the sleeping man closely. He couldn't be more than in his thirties, maybe younger, with white blond hair and a golden beard to match it. Thea had always thought facial hair made men look older, but not on this man. He had a baby face and nothing would age that smooth skin.

Noting the dark green Mando armor, Thea found it odd for a Jedi to be wearing such attire. Then again, everything was odd these days. Silently she removed the blankets from her and slipped out of bed. As she approached the door, Thea turned to look at the man who had kindly helped her. Returning back to the bed, she took one of the sheets and carefully draped it over his body and then tiptoed out of the room.

* * *

><p><em>I am in desperate need of a shower and clean clothes. If I can just sneak off to the ship, I can get off this rock and do both of those things,<em> Thea mused to herself as she padded her way through the house, hoping that no one was up yet. Her stomach rumbled angrily at her, reminding her that she had not eaten for almost twenty-four hours. _Okay, first find something to eat, get on the ship; blast off, shower and clean clothes._

The house was huge; it had to be to accommodate such large amounts of people. Not just any people at that-ex commandos took up a lot of room, but every house had some sort of kitchen in it. The distinct smell of caf filled her senses and followed her nose to the source. Thea halted as soon as she set foot in the kitchen seeing that she wasn't alone. Standing before her was the man who had caused her nightmares to reappear.

Cody froze in place with his mug half way tip toward his mouth and a look as if he were a deer caught in headlights. "Err…morning," Cody's voice was muffled by the cup as he quickly took a sip of the caf and made a sour face. It was hot and burned his mouth, but let the drink scorch his throat so that it gave him an excuse not to talk.

Thea didn't return the greeting and cautiously started forward, keeping a watchful eye on Cody as if he was going to spring at her any moment. She kept herself as far away as she possibly could in the space provided in the kitchen and Cody standing in the middle of it and as she reached the refrigerator door, Thea used it like a shield between the two of them.

Cody wasn't stupid, he could see what she was doing and it felt like a kick in the gut to see her so scared of him. For so long he had put on a façade of indifference to life, his life, other people's life, but seeing the terror he bestowed onto this woman snapped something inside of him.

"Listen," he began as the burning in his throat subsided. Thea's head popped up from the fridge and jerked toward him. That's as far as Cody got before the sound of doors opening and the pitter patter of boots filled the house.

Both turning to see their new visitor, Bardan Jusik entered the kitchen with sleepy eyes and mused hair, but looking like the ever impressive Mando. Seeing who Thea was standing with, his eyes instantly were more awake and looked between the two.

"Are you okay?" He asked Thea, but glared at Cody. Thea glanced between Jusik and Cody noting the taut glowers they were giving each other. _I have got to leave._

"I'm fine thank you, I was actually getting ready to leave," She quickly shut the fridge door and headed out.

"Leave?" Both Cody and Jusik called out and looked at each other again. "Leave?" Jusik continued and followed Thea out the kitchen, leaving Cody to stew by himself. "Why?"

"Why?" Thea's stomach again protested from the lack of food she neglected to grab from the kitchen and headed back to the room she had slept in to grab her boots. "Do you really have to ask?"

Jusik followed her in and shut the door so that anyone still sleeping would not be awakened from their voices. "I thought you were going to stay," he watched her as she buckled one boot onto her slim foot and reached for the other. Thea glanced up, her hair falling into her face and she blew at it to try and move it away from her eyes.

"I never said that," she retorted.

"You said it was the right thing to do," Jusik sat down next to her, noting her body tensing at his close proximity.

"No, you said that, I just stayed in the bed." Thea sat up and ran a hand through her tangled hair.

"Because it _was _the right thing to do," he insisted.

"Maybe for the night, but it's a new day I need to make a living. Staying here doesn't earn me credits," Thea argued.

"Staying here will heal you. Isn't that worth more than credits?" Jusik wasn't going to force Thea to stay, but he hoped that she would see the reasoning in his words.

"It's Bardan right?" Jusik nodded. "Bardan, just because you caught a glimpse inside this twisted noddle doesn't make you all knowledgeable and my best friend. I came here for a reason and overstayed my welcome."

Thea stood up once, but Jusik caught her arm, halting any movement. She frowned down at him, ready to lash out. "How much longer can you keep the monster at bay by yourself?"

"I won't stop running," She countered. She was being defensive, they both knew it, but that was how Thea had survived this long. Being soft, letting people in only got her hurt.

"Then why did you go up into Cody's room yesterday?" Jusik asked, noting that she wasn't struggling from his grasp, but in fact leaning into it. "Why did you go after Ahsoka and bring her back? Why not leave when you dropped your cargo off?"

He could see her cheek tick and her eyes narrow and then sadden. "You already know the answer don't you?" She said solemnly.

His blond head nodded, little tuffs of hair that were sticking up waved with the motion. "But I think you need to hear yourself say it."

"Because I thought they needed me, he needed me. Because I thought I would need him." Thea sat back down, Jusik releasing her arm and was surprised when she leaned onto his shoulder as if the weight of everything was finally taking its toll on her. "Because," her honeyed voice caressed his ears, "when I do stop the monsters will catch and devour me."

"Trust is a hard concept Thea, especially when one has had it broken and shattered many times in front of them. As a Jedi I am limited on my use of powers. As a friend my ability is endless. Will you trust me to help you as a friend?"

They both turned at the same time and looked at each other, Thea only seeing warmth, kindness and truth in his face. "For a friend, I shall try."

* * *

><p>Cody stared scathingly at his mug and didn't realize he had been standing in the kitchen for quite some time until someone clearing their throat startled him. Quickly turning to see who had interrupted him and out of instinct he reached for a side arm only to come up empty. The new comer raised an amused brow at him. Cody was looking at the familiar faces of a couple ex-troopers, though he did not recognize any of these men.<p>

"The kaminoans may have genetically designed us to be stronger and better than most, but if you were hoping to disintegrate your mug with lasers, well I don't think that was in their make up for any of us," the clone out in front teased. Or at least Cody thought it was teasing because he had said it with a dead pan face.

"I was just thinking," Cody eyed the five men who were all in some sort of cargo-type pants, four of them wearing grey/brown camo-patterned shirts. The one who spoke to Cody was in a deep hunter green shirt. _Odd…_

"Well, we just came by to get some caf and then we'll leave you to your thinking and perhaps some much needed medical attention to that," Dark green shirt pointed toward his hand and nodded toward his face before handing the other men some cups and reached across from Cody to grab the pot of caf.

"Who are you?" Cody ignored the prodding questions about his nasty bruised face and bloodied soaked wrap. It was none of anybody's business, especially to those he didn't know.

Cody may have been a well-known commander in his time with the GAR, but that didn't mean he knew everyone, especially with the various and specialized battalions and infantries.

"Levet," the man held out his hand toward Cody, who eyed him skeptically. He hesitantly held out his hand and Levet grasp Cody by the elbow, in a Mando fashion handshake. Clearly not something Cody was used to, he wretched his arm free and took a step back from the five men.

"Easy brother, he was just saying hello," one of the camo-patterns said. "I'm Cov, this is Dev, Jind and Yover," he pointed to each one. "Formally Yayax Squad now simple farmers, well sort of."

"We've gotten better," the one name Dev added.

"Learning new things, tweaking this and that to make the plants grow bigger and stronger," Jind joined in.

"It helps get food on the plates with the many hungry mouths around here," Yover said between sips of his caf. Cody looked at each man trying to determine if they had totally lost their minds and if they were for real.

"Well Commander Cody," Levet started. At Cody's shocked expression, Levet gave Cody a good slap on his arm, "of course we know who you are. Don't look so surprised. We must be off. The fields don't tend themselves. Don't think too hard today, you may just develop those lasers after all. Maybe get some treatment as well."

Lightly touching his sore cheek and trying not to wince, Cody watched as the five men made their way out of the kitchen as was overcome with a sense of longing to be a part of a group again. "Hey wait!" Levet stopped, but motioned for the rest to wait for him outside.

"Yes Commander?" Levet asked curiously.

"Just Cody," he corrected. "Can I help?" Levet looked down at Cody's wounded hand. "It won't get in the way. Please let me help." Levet nodded and Cody followed him out.

* * *

><p>Rex woke to a warm tingly feeling in his hand and arm. Craning an eye open he saw Ahsoka sitting upright and eyes closed, much like he used to see her when she was meditating. His hand was gently set in her lap with her fingers delicately stroking the injured area. He watched her work and it never ceased to amaze him the power the Jedi held. Her eyes fluttered open and the warmness he had felt moments ago slowly dimmed away.<p>

"Good morning," she smiled kindly at him.

"Umm…morning," he murmured and flexed his fingers finding that the pain and stiffness were gone.

"I thought that after last night," Ahsoka's cheeks turned a bright orange/red at the memory of their activity, "your hand would be incredibly sore. I'm no Barriss, but I think that did the job." Not realizing the slip she had made, Rex's golden orbs stared at her. "What? Oh…" she recognized her error. "Oh, Barriss…" she whispered.

Rex rolled onto his back, taking his hand back and held it in the air above him. He wiggled his fingers and flexed his wrist. "I think you'd make a fine healer," he said at last. Rex started to take the bandage off his hand. "I have to talk to him today."

The thought of her good friend and the ex-commander, the guilt and anger started to twist in Ahoska's gut. At one time Cody had been a good man, but why had he allowed her to perish? Why wasn't he as brave as Rex?

"You don't have to help him Rex," it was an incredibly selfish suggestion especially coming from a Jedi, but right now all Ahoska could think of was the pain Cody had inflicted on her lover and on her friend. Not to mention what he had done to Thea.

Rex turned sharply and a deep frown lined his lips. "He's my brother and needs our help."

"He also hurt you and Thea. What's to say he won't do it again or doesn't want your help Rex?" Ahsoka asked frustrated. Rex propped himself half way up and stared at her incredulously.

"Ahsoka, he's _my brother_," Rex emphasized on the my brother part. "We all have done wrong in our pasts and we aren't exempt from them. But if there is a slight chance that he can be helped, by the makers of this galaxy I will help him."

"I think Rex that you should have been the Jedi, not me," with that, Ahsoka left Rex glowering after her as she retreated to the refresher and closed the door on him.

* * *

><p>It was a tense silence as Ahsoka and Rex showered and dressed and after putting on some clean clothes they exited to the kitchen to see Thea and the man who had taken her to the room last night.<p>

"Bardan Jusik," he introduced and nodded politely to Rex and Ahsoka. "I see that your hand has healed."

"Yes, well Jedi are nice to have around in such cases," he said coolly and Ahsoka slightly bristled, but tried not to show it.

"Thea, are you okay?" Ahsoka asked concerned as she sat on the barstool next to the red-headed woman.

Thea looked at Jusik and then to Ahsoka. "Better; with permission I think I'll stick around for a little bit," Thea said to the young Jedi.

"I'm going to check on Cody," Rex announced and didn't wait for a response as he turned to leave and skip up the stairs.

"Ahsoka?" Thea turned querying eyes toward the girl.

The young Togurta's shoulders sagged. "I thought we were making progress until this morning." They were both distracted as Jusik slid of his seat. He put a gentle hand on Thea's arm, which she impulsively tensed under.

"I'll talk with you later," he said softly. She nodded and turned back to Ahsoka's own curious and twinkling eyes.

Before anyone had gone too far or said anything, Rex flew down the stairs, worry lines creased across his forehead and anger clenched at his jaw.

"What is it?" Ahsoka asked concerned.

"It's Cody." Thea's instantly straightened in her seat and Jusik was in full alert.

"What about Cody?" Thea croakily asked.

"He's not there."

* * *

><p><em>I wanted to say thank you to everyone who has been following this story so far. You're reviews are thoroughly appreciated and very encouraging! <em>

_So what do you all think? Lots more of exciting drama to come! _


	13. Chapter 13

Cody was not familiar with the concepts of farming, but then again why should he? He was bred and born a fighter, hands for picking up and firing a blaster and a mind for strategic planning and killing. Levet had given Cody a couple of tools to rake and dig up the earth so that later they could plant the new seedlings.

Cody never gave enough respect to the farmers he had come across on his many missions. Toiling soil and picking up plants, he had mentally snubbed the "simple" people as he would like to refer them by, weak for not putting defense and artillery as their main priority. Then again, if the defense and army starved, there would be no protection.

As he wiped at the sweat that began to bead along his hair line and drip down his face causing a smear of dirt to trail behind, Cody started to find farming a bit therapeutic. With each shuffle of earth, each toss of rock or clump of dirt all he had to worry about was getting the seed into the ground.

Cody paused and slowly stood up feeling his muscles pull and strain in protest from the unfamiliar exertion he was putting on them. Resting himself on the pole of his rake, he took a breather and watched as Levet till his part of the field with expertise. Turning his head slightly two of the boys from Yayax Squad were getting a very unfamiliar machine ready for something Cody had no idea about and the other two were off in the distance which Cody couldn't tell what they were doing.

"It's not easy, but it frees the mind," Levet's voice startled Cody out of his stupor. The man had not said anything to Cody all morning, only the sounds of squawking of shriek-hawks and the occasional clank of a rock being tossed into their ever grown pile would fill the void.

"I never considered farming as a liberating or enjoyable sort of activity, but I am glad that you let me join you," Cody returned to raking the dirt, slower this time. He noticed that the handle of the rake had turned red with an oozy substance and turned his hand over to see that his wound was leaking badly. _Sith, _Cody cursed to himself. It had been throbbing for some time, but he had told Levet and Yayax that he would not let it interfere with the work. Well he was a man after all and he would work through the pain. It was just blood and a little throb. A lot of throb.

Levet looked up as Cody once again stopped and saw the bloody stick. "Oisk son, let me see that," Levet threw down his rake and before Cody could protest, his hand was grasped by the clone-turned farmer and Levet started to remove the disgusting, blood soaked wrap. The wound was in desperate need of cleaning and repairing. Blackened crust formed around the edges while red and clear fluid seeped through, beginning signs of infection.

"Son, why didn't you get this treated? Levet admonished.

"I'm not your son," the words slipped out faster that Cody had time to shut his mouth. Pinching his lips shut had the decency to look bashfully at the man who let him join him and his group and took concern on his injured hand.

Giving Cody a stern glare but not saying anything, Levet started to lead the injured man by his wrist, giving him no choice but to follow. Cody almost tripped and fell a couple of times as he fumbled to keep pace with the ex-commander and struggle to get his hand back. "Quit," he heard Levet reproach. Cody recalled a memory when he and General Kenobi were planet side on Corellia.

They were in the middle of a fierce game of chase with a bounty hunter which landed them in the middle of the very busy capital, Coronet City. To Cody, it reminded him of a smaller, but just as crowded and much raunchier version of Coruscant. While he and Kenobi were scouting for the bounty hunter Cody heard a loud wailing sound and being on guard, he quickly swirled around to see a small child practically being dragged by the arm of his parent.

The parent looked completely embarrassed by the child's behavior and as they passed by Cody, he could hear a mortify mumble, "Quit," by the adult. It did nothing to pacify the child. Kenobi had explained to Cody that the child was having a temper tantrum.

Cody felt like having one right now. This commander was being nice to him and he wasn't sure how to make of it. He wanted to heal, but he wasn't ready to be close to anyone, was he?

They reached the edge of the field where the two members of Yayax squad, Dev and Jind were tooling around with the strange machine. They looked up curiously and then their eyes widened at the sight of Cody's bloodied hand in Levet's grasp.

"Dev, get some water and a scrub, Jind you get the first aid kit. Make sure there's a needle and thread."

"Yikes brother, what were you doing to cause that?" Jind asked before hopping off the seat of the machine and racing toward the first aid kit.

"Needle and thread?" Cody gulped. What kind of backwater world uses a needle and thread?

"Yes, your hand is split and needs to be sewn. A good whip stich should do it." Cody had never had to stich his own hand or any of his brothers in the field. It was either a quick bacta patch or there was nothing left of a trooper to stick together. "Sit," Levet commanded as Dev trotted up with a bucket of water and a scrub. Seconds later Jind sat down and placed the first aid kit on his lap, ready to hand any supply that was needed to their leader.

"When we are out here," Levet started to explain as he began to work on Cody's hand, "we can't run back to our house or Skirata's house every time we get a nick, laceration or even broken bone."

"And we've had plenty of those," Dev said as he watched with interest as Levet took the scrub and soaked it in the water and then mixed it with iodine to help clean out any infection or dirt that may be in the wound.

"Yes, well when you are first learning something, there are bound to be accidents," Levet added.

"Like when we first tried out this baby," Jind eyed the machine that Cody sat next to fondly.

"What is it?" Cody winced as the iodine stung his skin.

"It's a plow. Kind of a multi-tool plow. It makes turning up the fields so much easier and when it comes to harvest, you can't live without it," Dev explained.

"Then why are we doing everything by hand today?" Cody asked wearily.

"Because these two broke it," Levet narrowed his eyes at the two men who looked down with embarrassment. Levet took the needle and thread from Jind and looked at Cody. "This will sting."

"Can't be any worse than it is now," Cody tried to keep the pain from his voice. "So how did you two managed to break it?"

"It wasn't our fault," Dev defended. "Well I guess it was sort of." Cody could hear the "humph" come from Levet, but did not look at him as the man worked on his hand.

"Well you know how we were all raised on fast moving speeder bikes and ships," Jind started. Cody nodded. Yes, everything in the GAR was fast and powerful. "Well, the plow is not fast."

"But it is powerful," Dev cut in.

"But it could be faster. You know, get the job done twice as fast," Ah yes, Cody knew where this was going. For commandos, they sure sounded like rookie cadets. It was quite amusing.

"Well some things are just not meant to go fast," Dev gave an embarrassed shrug. "We put airspeeder repulsorlift as part of the engine…" Levet shook his head in disbelief. "It did go faster."

"These two jokers had Cov and Yover on the run as they were chased for about half the field by an out of control plow. They tore up the field not to mention the newly planted crops and the crops that were just starting to come up. It finally died, not before these two having to dive out and the engine exploding. There, you're done. Jind, hand me a bacta patch and the cohesive wrap."

Cody was amazed at how quickly and well-done of a job Levet had done. His hand didn't hurt nearly as bad as he thought and the stich was clean and thorough. "You didn't just learn this as a farmer did you?"

"No," Levet answered shortly. Cody waited for him to continue, but he did not. Cody did not push; it was not his place to ask. "I wouldn't recommend anymore tilling," Levet eyed the plow. "Hum…Boys, is this thing working at all?" He directed his question toward Jind and Dev.

The two camo-clad men looked at each other as if they were communicating telepathically. They turned back to Cody and Levet. "Sort of," Jind finally answered.

Levet gave out a sigh. "It is or it isn't."

"Well we've turned it on and it works, but we haven't moved it from this spot," Dev finished. Cody was starting to get a headache from these two talking. It really was like talking to two young children.

"I think it's time to find out. Dev you come with me, Jind you and Cody get to try the machine." Dev was about to protest, but the stern, "fatherly" don't argue with me look quieted him. Dev moved the bucket toward the back of the plow and started to head toward where Cody and Levet were working earlier.

"No high gearing it Jind. Show him the ropes and get this thing running. We need it for the next bunch of crops," Levet instructed. Turning to Cody he eyed the now wrapped hand, "take care of that hand. Having an extra set of hands is always helpful." The ex-commander turned to leave and follow Dev.

"Levet," Cody called out. Levet turned around and looked at him curiously. There was so much Cody wanted to say, but settled on a simple, "Thank you."

Levet nodded politely and continued walking. Cody turned his attention to Jind who was already up in the driver's seat. "He's a good man," Jind was tinkering with something on the control panel; Cody hoped it was for the benefit of the plow. He didn't want to have to abandon ship as in the story before. He climbed up next to Jind and sat down next to him, surprised at how comfortable the seat was. For a piece of farm equipment, it was far more luxurious seat than any military speeder. He could only imagine what it would be like working.

"I can tell," Cody agreed.

"He kind of took all four of us under his wing when we came here. We didn't know what to do with ourselves; I know for myself I kind of felt panicky abandoning the military. But it wasn't right you know how it went down and all. Brothers firing on brothers, having to hunt down deserters and Jedi, that's what the Empire wanted the four of us to do."

Cody froze as he listened to Jind's simple way of how he felt after deserting. It wasn't right at all, but he had stayed. Why? Because it was an order. But this simple trooper had found a way out before all the bloodshed, before he had to murder a Jedi.

"We were on a transport with the body of Etain Tur-Mukan. Do you know who she is?" Jind reached for a wire under the panel, and twisted it with another.

"No," Cody answered numbly. He didn't know all the Jedi in the order, but the mere mention of a dead Jedi sent horrid visions of him gunning down his own general.

"She was married to one of Skirata's sons. They had a kid too. She died just before getting through a check point and on her way to freedom. I never met her either, but we were told she was leaving the Order to be with her family. That's the kind of gal I would want."

"Wha…" Cody gulped and started again, "what happened to the child and father?"

"The child is with Sergeant Skirata at the home; the father, from what I hear stayed behind to be with one of his brothers' who was injured that night. He won't come home." Suddenly the roar of engine started and a cough of smoke plumed over them. Both Cody and Jind coughed and choked on the suffocating fumes.

"Well it's working," Jind strangled out, waving a hand to clear the smoke away from his face.

"Tell me Jind," Cody shouted over the roar of the motor, "Do you see this as your home now?"

Jind shut off the engine and looked at Cody with more seriousness than he had ever seen the camo-man wear. "This _is _my home. I wouldn't want to be anywhere else. I am here with my brothers and found someone to look up as a father. I wouldn't trade it for anything in the world."

Before Cody would reply, the whine of repulser engines could be heard making the men turn to see an airspeeder racing toward them. In the corner of his eye, Cody could see Levet and Dev dropping what they were doing and running toward them as well.

"Expecting someone?" Jind asked.

"I was hoping I had a little more time," Cody dourly answered.

* * *

><p><em>Levet and Yayax-well there isn't too much about them so it's fun to fill in the gaps! ;)<em>

_That talk with Rex is coming up soon so don't miss out! _

_Thank you all for your fantastic reviews and I hope you continue to enjoy the story. _

_Please let me know what you think!_


	14. Chapter 14

_Hi All,_

_here is the Cody/Rex / come to jebus moment. (lol) I hope it's up to par and you all enjoy it! Lots more to come _

_As always, I own nothing_

* * *

><p>Earlier at the house…<p>

"Do you think he ran?" Thea's heart pounded and she wasn't quite sure why. The man practically assaulted her last night and yet she was afraid for his safety.

"Cody may be a lot of things, but he's no coward. He's got to be here somewhere," Rex championed. His own heart was pounding in his chest, worry and anger pulsing vigorously through his veins. How dare Cody, his brother, the man he had stuck his neck out for ditch him. If he had truly run away, Rex would make it a personal vendetta to hunt him down and let Cody know exactly what he thought of that idea.

_No…you can't think that way. This is why you are at odds with Ahsoka in the first place. _Taking a deep breath, Rex turned to the two Jedi in the room. "Is there any way you two can feel for him?"

"Captain," Bardan Jusik started, but Rex quickly interrupted him.

"Don't call me that. I am no longer a captain." Rex completely ignored the heated glare from Ahsoka.

"Forgive me," Jusik nodded in his apology, "but I cannot allow the flippant use of the Force be spent around here."

"What?" Ahsoka and Rex balked. "It isn't frivolous usage anyway!" Rex bellowed, forgetting that there were some in the house that were still asleep.

"The Jedi are being hunted by predators never seen before. We are all at risk and if you," Jusik looked pointedly at Ahsoka, "want to continue to live here, you cannot use your powers so openly. Healing of a cut or broken bone once in a great while is allowed because we can hide the signature, but searching for one's mind or presence, well that is a dead giveaway. I will not let my family come to harm from such monsters."

"So you are saying Ahoska cannot be a Jedi here," Rex curled his lip in anger.

"We'll always be Jedi, just as you will always be a captain from a clone army. We cannot run from our identity," Jusik's words punched everyone present in the gut. "We just have to evolve from what we started as."

_Can a clone evolve?_

"We should tell Kal," Jusik began to back out of the kitchen but Rex stopped him.

"Don't. Not yet any ways," With the unhappy frown the Mando was giving him, Rex went on, "Cody wouldn't run away. He's here somewhere."

"Not yet what?" All four jumped in surprise when a new voice joined in. Rex grimaced, Thea stiffened and Ahsoka schooled her features blank as Kal Skirata walked in looking at each person with a cautious and suspicious eye.

"Commander Cody is missing Kal'buir," Jusik wasn't going to lie to the man that he most looked up to and called "buir."

Fearing for an outrageous outburst, Rex held his breath and almost sputtered spit everywhere when Kal calmly asked, "have you checked the fields where Levet and/or Yayax Squad are?"

"No, but there's a good bet he's there. Come on, we have to use a speeder to get out there," Jusik, followed by Thea started to quickly head out. Ahsoka slowly made her way around the counter and paused by Rex's side who had not moved yet.

"Rex, let me make one thing clear to you. What goes on in this household, I'll always find out. No secrets."

"No secrets sir," Rex said in a hushed voice. That little statement meant more than keeping secrets from the aliit leader; Ahsoka and him needed to stop as well. "Are you going to punish Cody for leaving?"

"Do you think he needs it?"

"No sir, I think he's been punished enough," Rex sincerely said. Ahsoka shifted and hid her disagreement well. At least well enough to unsuspecting eyes like Rex, but not to the wizened eyes of Kal Skirata.

"Go find him son," without another word, Rex left and Ahsoka at his heals. "Tano," Skirata called out. Ahsoka stopped mid step causing Rex to stop as well. She ushered him forward.

"I'll see you soon Rex," she took his hand and gently squeezed his fingers in an attempt to assure him. Doubt laced his honey orbs and she didn't fault him, not after their argument this morning. "It'll be okay, go and find Cody. See if you can bring some sense into all of this."

"Do you mean to us or him?" Rex lightly ran his calloused thumb over her much leaner and delicate digits.

"Hopefully both," she whispered. With that, he let go of her hand and Ahsoka watched him walk away until he completely exited the house. With a long drawn out and dour sigh, she slowly turned back around and made her way back to the kitchen. Skirata ice blue eyes followed every movement Ahsoka made right to the way she pulled out the barstool and slid her body into it. This is what made this man so deadly; so well respected as a Mandalorian. His ability to see every detail, to watch and wait like a hunter waiting for its catch.

Ahsoka hoped she wasn't considered an enemy to Skirata, she would hate to have to fight a man like him and truth be told, she didn't know if she could defeat him. Maybe she just didn't have the want or will to. "You wanted something?" She asked, keeping her voice neutral.

"You love that boy don't you?" Skirata set his hip against the counter, his iron clad armor making a slightly clanking sound as it rubbed against it. Ahsoka slowly nodded. Where was he going with this? "Do you have doubts that he is more clone than man?"

Ahsoka found herself balking at the question. "He is a man," she instantly defended Rex. "What is it that you are searching for Sergeant Skirata?"

"Perhaps that is the question you should be asking, young Jedi." Skirata pushed himself off the counter and just as he was about to pass Ahsoka, he placed a surprising light hand on her slim shoulder, "He will need you to continue to see him as a man. He will also need you to see him as more. Can you do that? I ask, little Jedi, because under their tough exterior isn't a grown man, but an unsure teenager, much like yourself. It's a lot to ask I understand." Skirata pursed his lips together for a minute. "I suggest you talk to some of the girls around here. Seek their wisdom."

Giving her a gentle pat, he continued on his way. Ahsoka slumped in her seat. She had so many questions perhaps she had been around the men too long and needed a little girl time; girl advice. Some questions just couldn't be answered by the male mind.

* * *

><p>"I need to see Cody by myself," Rex sternly said as he approached the speeder where Thea and Jusik had already taken a seat in. "I need to speak with him and he won't talk if he sees you two."<p>

Jusik nodded in his understanding, "Okay Rex."

Thea remained seated in the back and stared forward. "Thea," Rex said gentler this time, "now is not the time for either one of you to approach each other. What he did to you was incredibly wrong and believe me when I say this, Cody would have never done such a thing in any other circumstances."

"I want to find out why," Thea rumbled. "It doesn't make it right in any circumstance either Rex. He should face his victim in the eye." Thea turned livid eyes on him.

Rex let out a sigh. "It doesn't Thea. Cody will apologize to you, but I need to talk to him, brother to brother first."

Rex thought she was going to argue with him some more, but with stiff irritated movements, Thea removed herself from the back of the speeder. Before Rex could take a step away from her, Thea grabbed him by his arm and whispered, "An apology isn't all that I want."

Rex's forehead creased in confusion. "What is it then?"

"Restitution." With that, she marched back into house.

Rex stood there for a moment, letting the pressure of her grasp disappear and then looked toward Jusik. "Where would they be?"

"Fifty clicks north. Good luck Rex."

* * *

><p>Even if it was going to be just a few minutes Rex found that he could breathe just a little easier being alone with only his thoughts, the wind at his face and the hum of the airspeeder filling his ears. Centered on this thoughts should have been his upcoming discussion with his brother, but instead he couldn't help think about a certain Togrutan Jedi. Why did they always have to end up in an argument? Wasn't sex supposed to make things better? Rex faintly smirked. It made it better at that moment at least. But that was the problem; it was just a moment not a lifetime.<p>

Was it a trust issue with her? How much more did he have to prove that he loved her? That he could protect her? Show her that he was more than just a clone? What about last night about then when he asked to kiss her…there? She had let him, she had trusted him not to abuse the privilege and it brought both of them to greater heights than ever imagined. What did that mean then?

Then again, if he kept questioning himself, why shouldn't she?

Rex gripped the controls harder as these unanswered questions continually plagued him. Deciding to put that part of his life to the side, he tried to focus on Cody. Cody…what was he going to say to him? Bad boy for leaving and always check in before taking a step? No, Cody was a grown man and could make choices, Rex only hoped for the right ones. Perhaps he would just shake him until he rattled some sense into his brother's thick skull. Then again, what made sense to one man was chaos to another. Maybe he would just sit back and let Cody do all the talking. _Yes, let someone else talk and take lead for once. _

Rex skimmed over the vast field; the radar picked up six signatures ten clicks east of him. The dirk kicked up as Rex picked up speed and could vaguely make out four silhouettes. As he got closer he could see two of them who were actually in the field freeze and then run toward the other two who were on something Rex had never seen before.

Though Rex had farmed for the past year and a half with Cut and his family, it was an entirely different kind of farming. Granted the Lawquane family grew crops, but nothing to the extent of what was here on Mandalore. Not only that, Rex mainly handled the livestock and helped when it was time to harvest and bundle.

He started to slow the speeder and there was no mistaking that it was Cody sitting on top of the unfamiliar machine with an unfamiliar ex-trooper. Neither said anything to one another as they locked gazes. The young man who sat next to Cody looked back and forth between the two and was clearly uncomfortable.

"Well chaps, I can see this is going to be an engaging conversation so I'll just be on my way…" Jind started to climb off the plow, but Cody put a halting hand on his forearm.

"You don't have to leave Jind," Cody said objectively as he continued to stare at Rex.

"No really, I insist," Jind slipped down to the ground just as his brother Dev and Levet tumbled to a stop before them. Levet was quicker than Dev to compose himself.

"I am Levet, ex-commander of the 35th Infantry; these men are Dev and Jind of Yayax Squad. I suppose you came out here looking for Cody?" Levet took Rex in as he stepped out of the speeder. In his days of military, Levet was nothing but thorough and dutiful, but had become more cynical and guarded since the great betrayal. Since coming to Mandalore he had taken pride in his farm and unconsciously become protective of the four men who had sought a place to belong. He wouldn't let anything come between him and his farm. Like when he first saw Cody, Levet recognized this clone. He may have never served under him, but his legendary reputation carried throughout the GAR. "And you are Captain Rex."

"Just Rex," Rex finally took his gaze off Cody and acknowledged Levet and Dev. "This is your field?" He gestured to the toiled earth behind them. Levet nodded.

"Perhaps sometime we can swap farming ideas and stories, but for right now I need to talk to Cody privately."

Levet didn't say anything for some time, instead he turned his gaze toward Cody who was glowering at the panel of the plow like a child who was about to be lectured by a mad parent.

"Son, will you be alright?" Levet directed toward Cody. Rex felt the hairs on the back of his neck stand on edge and his nerves bristle. Who was this man to question his intentions? Then again, Levet had no idea what kind of man Rex really was.

"Yes," Cody sharply replied.

"Come on Dev; Jind, those vegetables won't plant themselves," Levet waited for the two younger members to walk in front of him and head toward their earlier work. Levet cast one last skeptical glance over his shoulder as he shuffled his way through the dirt.

"Friends?" Rex approached the plow and propped his arm against it. He noticed Cody had not made an attempt to get down from his seat, in fact Cody had not moved from his position at all. He was frozen like a statue and had a very sour pout on his lips. Looking for a step or a place to put his foot, Rex reached up to the door frame and hoisted his body up the plow and took the seat that Jind had occupied moments ago. Surprised at the comfort of the seat, Rex lightly bounced a couple of times on the cushiony bench.

"If the GAR had this kind of seating in the ground transports, I'm sure we would all be fighting for a turn in them," Rex joked lamely. Cody only gave him a sideways blistering look. Rex settled himself and gave out a weary sigh. "You know why I came out here."

Cody opened his mouth to give a caustic reply, but shut it. It was time, he wanted, needed to talk and begin the healing process. He needed to apologize to his longtime friend and brother and thank him for pulling him from the thick and choking grasp of his loathsomeness. Maybe.

"Do you remember when General Skywalker and Torrent Company had come to aid the 212th and General Kenobi in one of the last remaining battles with Grievous?" Cody remembered it vividly, just like all the battles he had participated in. "A small fighter was making a kamikaze mission into the _Resolute_ and there wasn't one man on that bridge who didn't just about kiss his shebs goodbye, but in a blink of an eye the fighter was obliterated and you saved us. And you know what you told me?"

"One more you owe me," Cody murmured under his breath.

Rex nodded. "Just one more to add the ever growing list I have that I owe to you."

"So this is just a favor you are doing so you can put a check mark next to?" Cody growled and finally looked at Rex dead on.

Rex rolled his eyes exasperatedly. "No and you know that. Don't you ever get tired of being a cynical jerk? I'm here to listen, my brother, not judge as much as I want to. We all have sin; maybe I can help just one person alleviate theirs."

Cody looked down at his hands and picked at his cuticle nervously. _When have I ever been this nervous? It's Rex for sith sake. Maybe that's why I am nervous. _

"I loved her very much," Cody started softly and Rex had to strain to hear. "I would have found a way to leave the GAR if that was the only true way of having a full life with Barriss. It may have been a silly fantasy, but we talked about what we would do after the war, if there ever was an after. Obviously there wasn't."

Cody reached down in front of Rex, Rex moving his legs out of the way as the man grabbed a couple of different colored wires and then just twisted them between his fingers. Rex found it odd, but figured Cody needed a conduit for his nerves. He waited for his friend to continue.

"You were the only one I told," Cody turned his sad brown eyes upon Rex.

"I know," Rex replied.

"You were the only one who could possibly understand," he was referring to Rex's relationship to Ahsoka. Cody had not known about Echo and Thea and later Fives and Bella, but the two commanding officers were different. They were committed to a Jedi. Cody's hands suddenly clenched the wires and his knuckles turned white. "Aren't two people who are meant to be together, madly in love together supposed to be…what do the fairy tales call it? Oh yes, live happily ever after?"

"Cody, that's why they are called fairy tales," Rex delicately chided.

Cody jerked his head toward Rex; dour eyes had turned to angry slits. "Maybe that's how I wanted us to live. Maybe I wanted to sweep Barriss off her feet carry her to the closest transport and fly off into the sunset and never look back."

"You're talking crazy," Rex said.

"No, crazy is what happened next. If I had done what I wanted to, then she would have still been alive."

* * *

><p>"<em>The time has come. Execute Order 66.<em>"

"Yes sir," Cody could hear himself respond to the Chancellor's command, but everything in him screamed no. His body refused to move for mere seconds and then the voice of his general telling him something snapped him back into action. _Barriss…_Voices battled between each other, one telling him to focus on the job at hand and the other to drop what he was doing and find her.

"Fire all blasters, cannons anything on General Kenobi," Cody immediately ordered through his commlink to his command. He turned around just as a long range cannon took a hit at Kenobi causing the Jedi and Boga to fall into a deep pit. Cody would never forget the actual horrified look as his general; his friend fell to his death. Even behind his mask, Cody and Kenobi locked gazes as Cody shamefully pointed and fired upon the falling Jedi.

He didn't know how long he stood on the edge of the cliff, but sound of running boots caused him to jump and aim his blaster at the on comers. A couple troopers slowed their approach and waited for Cody's next order. His nerves had reached their pinnacle peak and he didn't know how much more he could take. The thought of Barriss was burning a hole in his brain. He had just murdered his respected friend; the shock of it all was just setting in. He had to keep moving or he would go insane with worry and disbelief.

"Did you find the General?" Cody snarled. Anger was an easy emotion for Cody to hide behind.

"Sir," one of the troopers said, "no one could have survived that fall."

"Fine, start loading everyone one up for immediate departure!"

"Yes sir," the troopers turned sharply and followed his command. Cody turned back and looked down the darken crevice. _May the Force be with you General._ With that, Cody walked away.

It wasn't until he returned to Coruscant that he saw the list was plastered all over the barrack walls. Cody for a lack of words was shocked to see the devastation at the Jedi Temple. Fire burned without restraint and no one paid mind to put the inferno out. Screams could be heard throughout the streets and it was eerie to see the usual busy skylanes now clear and unused.

_Rex, I hope you survive the night. _Cody thought briefly of his brother and Jedi Tano. Yes, Cody was aware of their relationship and prayed that he had not followed the order as well.

As he and the other surviving members of the 212th were herded into the GAR barracks, men crammed themselves toward the live streams of ever updated data. Cody pushed his way through the crowd, much grumbling and cursing coming his way. He was shocked to find that this data were lists of names of the Jedi already assassinated and if possible by who.

_Please don't be up there, please don't be up there,_ Cody's heart clenched and lungs squeezed almost shut. The list was coming up on the N's which there wasn't much of and then the O's. Then he knew. Her name was up there in those ugly green letters. Barriss Offee-KIA by Lieutenant Galle on Felucia.

Cody's whole world seemed to come crashing down on him. Everything around him was in motion, but it was a blur. All sounds seemed to disappear except the loud rush of blood being pumped into his ears. _Barriss…Barriss…What have I done to you? _He clenched his jaw so tightly that a few of his molars began to crack and his body started to quiver. A trooper rudely shoved him by the shoulder trying to get a better view of the deceased list of Jedi, wrong thing to do to Cody at that very moment.

Cody turned his unbridled fury onto the unsuspecting trooper and walloped him in the head, knocking the man onto the ground. "Hey! That's my brother!" Another angry trooper yelled toward Cody and made a jump for him.

Disorder erupted as Cody took on both troopers. All sense of sanity had left Cody's mind and the need to extract revenge on anything fueled his rage. Men circled the fight much like a boxing ring and shouts from the crowd only pumped the fighters to continue their tirade. Cody was outnumbered two to one, but he didn't care. He had already given them each a swollen eye and split lip though he was in no better shape.

"Just because you're some high and mighty commander doesn't makes you better than all of us," The first trooper he had attacked sneered and spit some blood to the ground, "guess what _Commander_, you're nothing now! You're one of us!"

Cody lifted his bloodied lip in a snarl and was about to give a nasty retort, but the trooper's statement was true. All that he had worked for, fought for, it meant nothing. He really was just another face in a crowd of a million. Another murderer.

Cody prepared himself to lunge at the trooper, but the sounds of whistles and stomping feet made the crowd part. The distinct red and white colors of the shock troopers pushed their way through and halted in front of Cody and the other two battered troopers.

"Who caused this?" One of the troopers demanded. All fingers pointed to Cody. Without any further question, they roughly grabbed Cody and shoved him forward. Cody went without protest. He could hear the other two men who he had fought with argue with the shock troopers as they were being taken away. _Big mistake boys_ Cody silently thought. He glanced over his shoulder to see the two taking a violent stun to their sides and slumping to the ground. Cody slightly winced and turned away.

He didn't care what happened to him, Barriss was dead. General Kenobi was dead. Why had the world gone mad? Cody was brought into one of the familiar briefing rooms and made to sit for a long time. If they hope this would rattle his nerves, well they were wrong.

Cody guessed it had to be a couple hours later when the door of the room opened and a figure wearing the recognizable blue and white armor of the 501st stepped in. His breath caught when at first he thought this was his longtime friend Rex, but as the man approached closer, the armor and designs were different. _Thank god. Rex I hope you made it out. _A much worse feeling filled Cody. He had only worked with this man one time on Umbara. Dutiful, straightforward and cold is how Cody would describe Commander Appo.

"Causing trouble already Commander Cody?" Appo rested himself on top of the table and in front of Cody. "Having a hard time with the order? We're finding a lot of clones are."

_That's not the reason you di'kut but I'll play along._ "And you're not, Commander Appo?" Cody asked sardonically.

"An order is an order," Appo shrugged his plated shoulders.

"Spoken like a true clone. The Kaminoans must be proud," Cody wrinkled his nose in disgust.

Appo didn't say anything for a minute, but suddenly Cody saw stars in front of his eyes. Appo had just punched him in the side of the face! When his eyes stopped watering and his vision slightly cleared, Cody mockingly laughed, "Owe. I guess you talked to the two I beat up earlier. Can you tell them we're even now?"

Cody could swear he heard the other commander growl from inside his helmet. "I would kill you right now if I could."

Cody became very serious. "What are you waiting for?" _I have nothing left, perhaps he knows that and that's why he is keeping me alive._

Appo shifted and folded his arms in front of him. If Cody could see the other man's eyes, he probably had narrowed them at him. "No, a highly looked up to commander such as yourself should stay alive as long as possible. You are going to be assigned to training the new recruits. You will be shipped off to Kamino in a few weeks after you become familiar with the new Imperial process. In the meantime you will also process any prisoner that comes in after their interrogation."

It took all of Cody's restraint not to lash out at Appo. He couldn't possibly handle processing prisoners, not after Barriss. It was a test it had to be. It was a test of his loyalty, his duty to the new Empire. Wasn't killing General Kenobi enough? All Cody could do was nod.

"Good, you start tomorrow. We have plenty of prisoners already." Appo slid off the table and headed out of the room. "Commander," Appo paused in front of the door.

"What?" Cody asked tersely.

"I recommend that you don't get into any more fights, the Empire doesn't look kindly to disorder. We'd hate to lose a man of your…_status._" Appo opened the door and Cody turned to give him a harden look, but his eye, the other now swollen shut from Appo's assault, opened wide as the two men who Cody had provoked into a fight, their lifeless bodies were stripped of their armor and body glove leaving them only in their briefs. Appo raised a hand for the men to halt in front of the door so that Cody could get a good look at the bruised and welted bodies.

"This is what happens to chaos." With that, Appo exited and the door shut.

* * *

><p>"It was probably a month before I was shipped off to Kamino to start training the new recruits. In that time I, along with a few other men processed the prisoners after their interrogation just as Appo had promised. I tried to keep my mind dead each time we had to approach one of them, but I found myself thinking about Barriss. I hoped that her death was quick and painless, unlike these unfortunate souls. None lasted more than a week, at the most. You could hear their pitiful moans and whimpers asking for relief from life. I begged silently that this wasn't what Barriss had to go through. If it had, I couldn't live with myself.<p>

"At nights it was the hardest. The big, strong unflappable Commander Cody would huddle up in a ball on his cot, head buried in his arms and I would rock himself to sleep, if sleep would even come. Sometimes I just spent the night in the refresher because my stomach couldn't keep anything down. Many thought of me as weak, thinking it had to do with the prisoner duty and not handling the change in government. I let them think that. It was just easier.

"I dreamt frequently of her. Some just of her smiling face, us walking silently together, I even had one where I was about to propose but before I got the words out I woke up. I guess it was a sign that it was never meant to be."

"I wouldn't say that," Rex said softly.

"Why not?" Cody scorned. "It wasn't, she isn't here and I won't ever get to ask her." Rex looked away and kept silent. His friend was right, he wouldn't get to ask Barriss those words, but his life wasn't over yet.

"I wished for one of my dreams that she would blame me, yell, scream, cry or hit me."

"You think that would make things better? That suddenly all of your sins would be lifted?"

"Not all of them," Cody mumbled. "It didn't matter. I was going to be transferred to Kamino within a week. I had to do one thing before leaving. I needed to find Lt. Galle and ask him how she died."

Cody stopped and toyed with the wires in his hands. "Cody?" Rex asked.

Cody slightly turned his head toward his friend. "I never got the chance to ask. He and Bly were sent on a mission to Kessel. It was probably for the better in the long run. Too many questions and suspicions would arise from it.

"I was sent home and I think I would have rather stayed with the prisoners."

Rex lifted his lip in disgust. "Why?"

"The Empire began recruiting, Rex. The days of cloning and brotherhood are gone. The qualities of a good soldier are being replaced by cheap wannabes who want to hold a blaster. They can't shoot straight to save their lives, can't listen to rhyme or reason and have no respect for one another. It's amazing they survived childhood. I would trade an entire platoon of recruits for one good clone brother. Then again, the galaxy had flipped a lid and they are hard to find. I recall one time we were doing an exercise and one of the recruits hit his head on a door! A door Rex! If it were up to the Kaminoans, he surly would have been reconditioned. So I took it into my own hands."

Rex's imagination went wild with the possibilities of what Cody had done. He finally asked, "What did you do?"

"I shot him," he answered simply. "Can you imagine an army of idiots that can't even get past a door?"

No, Rex couldn't and if he was in Cody's shoes, he probably would have done the same. "So what made you finally leave it all behind?"

Cody dropped the wires from his hand and sat back in the seat. He looked out onto the field where the two members of Yayax Squad and Levet were hard at work. Far in the distance, the other two members Cody had yet to talk with were also working.

"My complaints about the Stormtooper Corps on how awful they truly were went upon deaf ears and the death rates climb at exceeding rapid rates, faster than any of the times during the wars with our boys. It was always a shock to see more and more wanting to recruit, but I am sure half the time it wasn't voluntarily.

"The day came when I was in the mess hall eating by myself as I usually did until a couple of the rookies decided that I needed some company. I was about to tell them to get lost when they immediately dove into a conversation about some missions that some other troopers went on and I guess the officers told one person and so forth. You know how fast rumors spread when we were in the GAR."

Rex nodded. Most of the time he didn't let the rumors his men spread get to him, let them filter in one ear and out the other.

"This one was too disturbing to just ignore. The Emperor was going to have the galaxy in the palm of his shriveled old hand one way or another. If a planet didn't submit then it would succumb by force. These boys were so excited by how the Empire swooped in and conquered these planets as if it were the plaque. We might as well have been. I tried not to believe, but they were so enthusiastic about it. Garrisons were sent in and annihilated cities, killed innocents, took what they wanted, who they wanted…Rex." Cody stopped mid-sentence and the tormented stare he gave his friend sent chills down Rex's spine.

"When I mean they took any and everything I don't just mean buildings and priceless gems."

A nauseated churning sensation pitted in the middle of Rex's stomach at the very thought of Cody's meaning. "Could it have just been a rumor Cody?" Rex gulped. He was familiar was the orders from his flash training, though he never thought the day Order 66 or Order 37 would have been implemented. He was wrong about one so why would he be right to assume that the other had not been acted upon? Did the non-clones even know about the orders that his brothers grew up on?

"It could have been. I was so disgusted with these creeps that I swept my arm angrily across the table sending all of their plates of food to the floor. I left in a rush before I heard their bellows of anger, though I don't think they dared to test me and stormed down the halls and into one of the officer's rooms. I demanded to know if it was true. He asked me what and that was the final straw. Something inside me completely snapped and I just lost it. I grabbed him by the throat and slammed the man up against the wall ready to bash his brains in. He must have seen or sensed the murderess intentions and set off a silent alarm because before I had the chance to spill blood two shock troopers had their stun batons trained on me.

"I slowly let the officer down onto the ground and calculated my odds of survival if I made an attempt to escape. While not good, I rather die trying to get out than having to stay another day in this pitiful nonsense they had the gall to call an Empire. The officer was yelling at the two shock troopers to apprehend me and as they lowered their batons, that's when I struck. It was all a blur and in the end, I got a hold of one of the batons, shocking the guards and the officer into unconsciousness. Taking their blasters I managed to get as far as the docking bay before questions were asked.

The flight attendant, one the clones, one of us Rex, stopped me and told me I didn't have clearance to leave. He held his blaster at me, like the dutiful soldier he once was. I was half way up the ladder of one of the newer model fighters and slowly climbed back down. I took off my helmet and looked the man in the eye.

"Solider," I said to him, "do you really want to shoot me? If you do, do it now." His jaw ticked and the conflict his eyes stormed. We were bred to follow orders, how was he not supposed to shoot? I have to say I was surprised, but held it in check when he stepped back and holstered the blaster. I turned on my heels and didn't look back. Maybe Barriss was watching over me that day, or I was just that lucky. I don't know. But I escaped and turned my wraith into whatever I could find."

"Like collecting bounties?" Rex softly scowled.

"No," Cody sharply corrected, "actually I never did bounty hunting until I found out about you and your Jedi. I found all kinds of odd jobs. From mining, underground black market sells, to…" Cody once again trailed off and his cheeks lit up in a hot red. "Well that part of my life I would like to forget. But I made enough money to get by and stay out of the limelight."

"What made you seek Ahsoka and I out?" Rex didn't ignore the bright embarrassed burn on Cody's face, but he didn't want to humiliate his friend any more than he was. What could he have done to mortify himself that much?

"You and she were listing as missing. I assumed that you were out there somewhere and I remember one time you telling me about your farm adventure on Saleucami. Rex, I was bitter, angry and jealous just at the measly thought that you had your girl and I didn't. I still am. Barriss should still be alive. She was a pure, glorious spark and goddamn everyone to the foul stench of hell that she was the one to die!" Cody shouted and kicked angrily at the floor of the plow.

Both men sat silently for a long time, Rex soaking in Cody's morbid and sorrowful story and Cody trying to gather his strength from retelling his tale.

"I'm sorry Cody," Rex started caringly. "I'm sorry for your pain, your loss, your sorrow and your trials. I'm sorry I wasn't there as a brother should have been. I am here now and I hope as a friend, as a brother we can begin to heal your wounds." A shallow sob escaped Cody's lips and he tried to muffle it by sticking his fist in his mouth. "Let Barriss's memories live fondly though you, don't let them be the end of you. Live brother." Rex reached out and wrapped his hand over Cody's shoulder and he could feel the man's attempt to suppress his trembles. It didn't stop Rex from noticing the liquid falling and splattering on the floor. "You also need to come forward to Thea. She was only there to help you," Rex added.

Cody's head slumped deeper between his arms, burying his shameful and guilt ridden face. The weight and guilt of how and what he had done to the scared woman pressed upon his already burden shoulders.

"Maybe I didn't want her help," Cody snapped. _No, you don't want her help because she reminds you of the loving hands of Barriss. But what you did is still inexcusable. _A moan slipped from Cody's mouth. "How can she forgive me? Will she forgive me? How can you forgive me? How do I forgive me?" He shuddered.

"Time my friend."

Cody wiped his face, effectively smearing the trail of tears and dirt and turned to Rex, a vague turn of a smile at the corner of his lips. "Thank you for listening brother."

* * *

><p><em>So...what did you all think? Was it okay? <em>

_Still lots more moments, Thea/Cody are next as well as Ahsoka, Thea and the girls! _

_Please review =)_


	15. Chapter 15

Morning in Kyrimorut was bustling with activity as soon as everyone had awakened. Fives and Ordo were busy fretting over their very pregnant wives, trying to get them to sit and not worry about making anyone breakfast. Ahsoka quickly volunteered to lend a hand in the kitchen much to the men's gratitude. Another Twi'lek named Laseema, Ahsoka vaguely recalled meeting on their journey to Mandalore was busy bustling her way around, flipping hot cakes and dicing fresh fruit.

"These boys," Laseema kidded, "their appetites never end!" Ahsoka laughed and actually found herself enjoying the domestic feeling of cooking and family. _Would it be like this with Rex and me?_

"I can never have enough of you my pretty," Atin, Laseema's husband had snuck in the kitchen and placed a slobbering, obnoxious kiss on the back of her long neck. Laseema squealed and jumped around to clobber Atin, but he quickly made his retreat not before sneaking a piece of fruit from Ahsoka and popping it in his mouth with a wolfish grin plastered on face.

Besany and Bella were laughing hysterically and Ahsoka just smirked. "I'll get that man, just he wait," she threatened, but her smile said otherwise. It was interesting for Ahsoka to watch the different personalities interact and reminded her of the fonder days, the days before everything went to disarray in her world.

She was not familiar with the commandos never having worked with them before, but they didn't seem all that different than the troopers she fought alongside with. A couple were already seated at the large dining table dressed in their full glorified Mando armor making them appear bulky and brutish, chatting away in what Ahsoka assumed was Mandalore's native language. She did recall a couple of her troopers using a dialect and terms she supposed were taught to them by their training sergeants.

Everyone present stopped and stared toward the main living room as what sounded like a herd of banthas came charging in. Two men, one Ahsoka immediately noticed had silver metallic hands bounded after each other, yelling and laughing like boisterous boys high on sugar.

"Hey!" Skirata and Walon Vau bellowed as the two men ran around the furniture, one keeping the object securely out of reach from the other. Ahsoka had never seen such chaos from grown men. It was simply delightful!

"I think it's twenty to what, two now Corr?" The man who was securely holding the object to his chest taunted.

"In your pea brain mind it might be Fi," Corr made a wild grab for Fi, succeeding only in falling to the ground. Fi turned around and gave a cocky smile. He dangled the object which now Ahsoka could see was some sort of ball in front of Corr.

"I may be slow, but I know how to count! Come and get it metal man."

"Fi…" Skirata warned but the warning came a second too late as Corr bundled up his leg muscles and made a leap at Fi. They tumbled backward into Skirata and Vau who were sitting on the couch and they all summersaulted backwards onto the ground.

"Kal! Walon!" Besany and Bella shouted as they scooted out of their chairs.

"Buir! Vau!" Ordo and Fives shouted at the same time, while the others at the dining table rolled their eyes and carried on with their conversation. Ordo and Fives halted the two women from moving and went over to assist with the pile up.

Fi and Corr were shoved and kicked off to the side as the two older men scrambled up from the ground. "Di'kuts both of you!" Vau shouted as he unfolded himself from the mess and stood up, shrugging off Five's hand from his arm. "What in seven hells are wrong with you two?" Vau snarled and then stormed off where he wouldn't be bothered for quite some time.

"Are you alright Buir?" Ordo asked, ever concerned for his father's safety.

Skirata placed an assuring hand on Ordo's arm and gave both Fives and Ordo a nod and then turned his attention to the two who caused such mayhem in the first place. Fi and Corr looked up at the sergeant with childlike apprehension, waiting for their "father" to reprimand them. Skirata instead bent down and took the ball that Fi had been keeping away from Corr and tossed it a couple of times in the air and then tossed it to Fives.

"Looks like you have two new players," Skirata slightly smirked and walked away. Ahsoka was just about blown away by the way the Mando-Sergeant handled the situation. Before she could reply though, Ordo, Fives, Fi and Corr were running out the front door and trying to tackle Fives.

"Men will always be little boys until the very end," Besany chuckled, as she rubbed her large round stomach.

"It's what keeps you youthful, Bes'ika," Skirata winked at her and Bella as he went to track down Vau.

Ahsoka had unconsciously stopped cutting the fruit and had become lost in her thoughts. _Is this what a family with Rex will be like?_ She asked again._ Can a screwed up Jedi wanna be and an ex-clone captain who can't figure out whom or what he wants to be meet in the middle? I know I love hi,m but what will stop him from leaving? What will stop me from always wondering what if? _

"Ahsoka," Bella's gentle voice brought her out of her revive and she slowly looked at the colorful woman. The circumstances weren't the best when they had met, but Ahsoka would never forget the kindness Bella had bestowed on Rex and her that night. Bella glowed with benevolence and compassion and there was something about her being pregnant the made her seem to glow even more. The woman, Besany also seemed to have a glow about her as well.

"Are you okay?"

"Yes," Ahsoka put on a false smiled, but Bella was not to be fooled. Her lips dropped. "I don't know." Besany and Bella turned their attention on the confused girl and though Laseema was still preparing the meal, she was listening.

"It's not fair," Ahsoka muttered.

"What's not fair?" Besany asked.

"I don't know what to do anymore. When I think Rex and I are doing well, back on the right path one of us, well it's mostly me that I open my big mouth and say something to throw us off and we end up fighting. Is that normal? It doesn't seem like a normal thing that when in love we should be fighting like this." Ahsoka looked to each woman with her big blue eyes, begging them for answers.

"Fighting is normal as long as the two of you can come back to each other and make amends and build from it," Laseema finished up with the rest of the meal and then rested herself onto the counter.

"No couple is perfect," Besany added. "You can't see eye to eye on everything, but communication is important as well. If you can talk it through and find out the root of the issue or tell him why you are upset…we all know that our men are very good at hiding their emotions and playing the big tough guy." With nods all around, Besany continued, "It has taken a long time for Ordo to talk to me when he's upset about something whether it be about his brothers, his past, the present or if it's something I have done. Especially if I have upset him, he likes to keep his mouth zipped up. With time, persistence, patience and trust Ordo and I have been able to talk about things that he wouldn't have spoken about ever before."

"Are you three ever afraid?" Ahsoka asked slightly embarrassed. _I'm a Jedi…sort of. I shouldn't be afraid. _"I mean, you two are going to have babies! Aren't you scared of bringing them into a world of an unknown future and their fathers won't be around to see them as teenagers, let alone adults?" It was a harsh question, but the questions started spewing out of her mouth and there was no stopping them. "How did you know this is what you wanted? How did you know that this is what they wanted?" Her voice started to rise with her intense agitation. "What if…what if…Rex doesn't want me? What if I have driven him away with my cold indifference and intolerance towards Cody? What if I am not the girl, the Jedi he thought I was or should be?" Silence between the women filled the kitchen and the looks shared amongst Laseema, Besany and Bella were lost on Ahsoka.

"That sounds like a bit self-pity to me," Laseema said. Ahsoka looked astonishingly over at the blue-skinned Twi'lek. "Do you really think Rex would want someone else, after everything he has done for you and you have done for him? Do you think that little of him to look at you differently if you weren't a Jedi or decided to put your training off to the side?"

"Well, I guess not," Ahsoka uncomfortably admitted.

"Then why have such doubts? You love the man don't you? And he loves you?" And just as a small child without an answer would, Ahsoka nodded her head ever so slightly and shrugged her shoulders.

"Ahsoka," Bella's gentle voice drew the young girl's attention toward her, "We've all been though a lot, some a bit more than others, but we all have one thing in common."

"What is that?"

"Our trust: trust in ourselves, in each other and in our loved ones. If we didn't have it, none of us would be here. I have to admit some things were not entirely planned," Bella lightly rubbed her stomach, "but I know I can trust Fives to continue love and protect me and our daughter. Just as Besany can, Laseema, any of the family. It is scary to think that we are bringing a presence into a turbulent and unknown world, but I have no doubts that I would want any other person than Fives to be there with me. His love is monumental and steadfast.

"I can tell you from experience that this wasn't what he wanted at first," at Ahsoka's wide eye shock, Bella continued, "He was frightened. He even asked me to terminate the pregnancy because he didn't know how to be a father. It wasn't exactly in the GAR handbook or flash training. We fought about it, but after some time and talking the idea of becoming a father grew on him. He is still scared, I am scared, but I trust him and myself that we will be the best parents this child can ever have.

"For you, as a Jedi you learned to have faith in your masters and the men you commanded. You entrusted your masters to teach you well so that you could control and use your powers for good and eventually teach others. You trusted your command to keep you safe on the battlefields even in the worst of times. A horrible crime happened to you Ahsoka, when your faith in them was broken. The one you saw as a mentor and brother turned his back on you betrayed you to the dark. The men who you called friends are now your enemies. That is except for Rex. You found that bit of white spark, that bit of trust and laid it into his hand and he has kept you safe. I can only imagine the treachery you felt on that night and how hard it has been to find that trust again, but if there is only one person in this universe that you can and should trust and love, be it Rex."

"I want to, I do trust him, but I am so scared," Ahsoka confessed.

"No one said you had to be brave all the time," Besany said.

"I'm supposed to be a Jedi, yes I do," but Ahsoka felt less like a Jedi than any other time in her life. The spotlight was on her and she felt as if an audience of a million were watching and waiting for her next move. She felt meager, tiny and fragile. The feel of soft fingers curling around her hand made her eyes travel back to Bella.

"You're a young woman, no you don't. Not all the time." Ahsoka closed her hand around the colorful woman's hand in much needed assurance.

* * *

><p>After breakfast was served the women went into the main living room to continue their conversation which Ahsoka found very alien. She had never conversed much with the girls at the temple and never for simple pleasure. If there was a minute of spare time it was spent either training or in meditation or for Ahsoka a hopeful minute in secrecy with Rex, which brought her back to her current thoughts.<p>

So many questions tangled in her mind it just about overwhelmed her. Shouldn't trust be approached with caution? Shouldn't it be earned? _How much more does he have to earn Ahsoka?_ She scolded herself. _He left the only life he ever knew for you. He is in deep conflict because of it. What else does he need to prove?_ That was the million dollar question. What was keeping her from totally embracing him?

Blinking a few times to try and clear her muddled mind, Ahsoka once again was drawn to Besany and Bella and a pang of longing and guilt filled within her. _I'm sorry Rex. I don't know if I can ever give you that._

"Does it hurt?" Ahsoka asked the two women.

"No not at all, though he does like to make his mother uncomfortable at times," Besany giggled. "Like when I eat something he doesn't agree with or is shifting for a more comfortable position, like right now."

"Or having to use the refresher every five minutes. Most inconvenient especially when you're not around one," Bella added. Her face contorted in an odd expression and for one horrified second Ahsoka thought it might be time and needed to get Fives.

"Are you okay?" She asked worriedly.

"Yes, she's just trying to find a bit more room. I bet it's getting a bit cramped." Bella looked at Ahsoka curiously. "Would you like to feel?"

"Really?" Ahsoka asked nervously, excited nerves tingled throughout her body. She had only a handful experience with younglings and infants and never in her life had she felt a baby before it was born. She approached with apprehension and lightly placed her hand on Bella's belly and waited. When nothing happened, Ahsoka frowned up at Bella and like a mother looking down at her daughter, Bella smiled maternally at her. "She's not…" and then Ahsoka felt it, the teeny little jolts against her hand. She raised her other hand and gently pressed her fingers as the tiny being continued her kicks. She was amazed and fascinated at the same time that something, _not just something, but someone_ was growing inside her friend's stomach.

The kicks stopped and Ahsoka slowly let her hands drop to her lap. "Thank you," she said faintly. "What are you going to name her?"

"Fives and I have decided to call her Ekho, with a k. In memory of his brother," Bella said fondly. It was then something in Ahsoka that snapped. The need to talk with Rex was emanate.

"How far away would Rex be from here on foot?" Ahsoka quickly asked.

"Too far, take one of the speeders from the shed," Besany said.

Quickly unfolding her legs and standing up, Ahsoka rubbed her hands awkwardly on the sides of her hips. "Thank you all for listening."

"We're your friends, any time Ahsoka," Besany smiled at the girl. Ahsoka smiled and nodded back.

"Ahsoka," Bella called before the young Togurta was completely out of sight. Ahsoka peered around the corner. "Trust in him."

"I will. Believe me I will."

* * *

><p>Her breath hitched in her throat, it was hard to breath. She needed to get out into the air, out of this stuffy house and away from everyone that reminded her of him. That meant leaving this blasted planet.<p>

Thea hadn't intentionally meant to listen in on the conversation, but she had caught the tail end of Bella telling Ahsoka what her baby's name was. Echo, but with a K; in memory of her love, her one and only. It should have made her feel good that his name, his legacy would live on, but it just brought sorrow and heartache to her afflicted heart. Stifling a sob that threatened to expose her presence, Thea turned on her heals only to run smack dab into Jusik's chest.

"Thea?" Jusik's worried brown eyes casted upon her. His gloved hands gently wrapped around her slim arms, her flightsuit crinkling under his fingers.

"Let me go Bardan," she pulled down and ducked away from his grasp.

"Thea, please tell me what's wrong. I can help," his smooth, soft accent did nothing to pacify her.

"Can you help me Bardan? Can you make the agony leave for good? Can you make Echo come back? Because that's what'll it will take to help me." Thea and Bardan locked heated gazes. _Help,_ she cried.

_I'm here,_ he wanted to answer.

When nothing was said by either one of them, she shrugged out of his hold and trotted out of the house. Though she felt the need to run, Thea didn't go very far. In fact, she only made it to the front deck, taking a big gulp of cool air into her constricted lungs. Bracing her arms and hands against the wooden banister, Thea continued to let the cool breeze run over her scarred face, wishing she could just fade away with the wind.

It could have been minutes or hours later, but a masculine sigh made Thea reopen her eyes and look over to see Jusik standing a few feet away, enough to give her breathing room and not feel threatened. "You know I can't make Echo come back, but the pain can stop if you allow yourself the help. Don't let the cold, murky hand of the reaper claim you as a victim. Take my hand and pull yourself away from the gloom."

"I am no victim!" Thea snarled. "I am no one's victim Bardan Jusik!" Unaware that he had just treaded on cracked glass, Jusik backed up a few steps.

"I'm sorry Thea; I didn't mean it that way."

"Then what way did you mean it?" She growled.

"You are a victim of yourself."

"I told you, I am no ones' victim…" before Thea could go on, Jusik interrupted her.

"You cry of monsters and run from your demons. You claim of pain and agony and pine for a lover lost."

"I'm not the only one," she defended.

"No, you're not," he continued, "but you use him as an excuse not to be able to move on or heal. You are a prisoner and until you can release yourself, you will always be that no matter how much you care about young Ahsoka or Cody." At the mention of Cody, Thea's head snapped around and eyes glowed at Jusik. She turned around and rested her back on the banister and folded her arms over her chest, defensive and guarded.

"You said you wanted restitution from Cody, but I have a feeling it isn't Cody that you really want it from. He's just a target and easily attainable." Jusik had taken up a similar posture as Thea, still a few feet away. Thea looked aghast at the ex-Jedi as he continued to look at her.

"How can you say that?" She asked appallingly. "I would never just single one person out unless well deserved. What he did…"

Jusik cut Thea off again. _That man!_ "What he did was rotten, horrible and yes he should look you in the eye and apologize and beg for your forgiveness. What is it that you would want from him that could compensate for your misery? Would it make you better? Would it free you?" Jusik asked, his dark eyes deepening with his growing intensity.

"You're right Bardan," Thea admitted dejectedly, "you're absolutely right. There is nothing that anyone could do to make it better, to free me."

"Wait, that's not what I meant," Jusik quickly back tracked.

"But you are right. There is nothing that can I can do to make anyone repay for the wretchedness and ugliness my world has become. Maybe some people are meant to have misfortune and scars so that others can live in beauty and love." Thea could vaguely make out Bella and Besany conversing inside. "Maybe one day I can learn to free myself. One day I would really like that."

Both craned their necks as voices could be heard coming around the corner. Before any intrusion could happen, Jusik stepped closer and covered her cold, clammy hand with his.

"What are you doing?" She asked confused.

He ignored the question and said profoundly, "It doesn't have to be some day Thea. Beauty and love exists within and around you don't shut it out."

She slightly cocked her head at Jusik, her harden look had softened some. "You are a curious man Bardan. Why you are attracted to emptiness and despair it is quite strange, but your decision."

"It's not emptiness and despair I see Thea, but passion and courage."

* * *

><p><em>Thank you all for continued awesomeness! You're reviews and support make this story happen =)<em>

_More to come-Fives and Thea have an upcoming big talk, more Rex and Ahsoka and soon a big Thea/Cody build up. It's going to be good I promise! _

_As always, please let me know what you think! _


	16. Chapter 16

Coming around the corner with his three brothers, Fives listened amusedly to the banter his three brothers threw back at each other about their game of tackle ball when he caught sight of Thea and Bardan Jusik standing on the deck together. Not only were they standing on the deck together, but Fives keen eyes locked onto Bardan's hand which was securely wrapped around Thea's. What was Bardan Jusik doing with his deceased brother's girl?

"Guys, I'll catch up with you later," Fives said to his brothers, tossing the ball to Ordo and then trotted in the direction toward Jusik and Thea. Seeing them turn and look at his approach, Fives slowed until he was right in front of both of them and didn't miss Jusik slip his gloved hand off of Thea's and rest it at his side. He narrowed his eyes just ever so slightly at his friend, unsure of his intentions. Remembrance of last night's tirade from Thea and the stinging accusations she had bestowed on Fives still weighed heavily on his shoulders and conscience. He was hesitant to talk, fear of her becoming hostile toward him once again, but she needed to hear about Echo.

"Fives," Thea called to him, none of the former resentment and anger she had was present. A small glance at Jusik which again made Fives very confused, she jogged down the steps of the deck to stand in front of him. Jusik backed away and went in search of some much needed advice for his own sake.

"Fives," she started again, trying to keep from tensing she took his rough hand into hers. "I want no need to apologize for my actions last night."

"Don't worry about it Thea," Fives tried to brush off.

"No Fives, I was really awful to you and the things I said were uncalled for. Yes, you are not Echo, but you are a good man. It wasn't your fault."

Was he being forgiven? "I could have held him back…" Fives found it suddenly hard to speak, his voice becoming hoarse.

_You could have_ Thea cringed at the bitter thought, but there was some cruel reason that Echo had died that day. "Fives," Thea swallowed hard, "I wish I was a different person, less selfish and was able to share my thoughts and feelings with you, but I am not. I do though want to listen to your thoughts, your feelings and hear about Echo. Please." It sounded almost like a soft and desperate plea and he would not, could not deny her.

"Walk with me," He looped his arm through hers, a trait he had learned from Bella and the many walks they had on their time on Mandalore. Muscles rigid at the contact, Thea did not make an attempt to pull away and went with him. With no destination in mind, they walked toward the garden of flowers which in the daytime looked like any ordinary bloom.

"What are these Fives?" Thea indicated toward the garden. "I have never seen flowers glow so brightly as these ones."

"We call them Lunar-Blossoms because of their tendency to glow only at night. There were only a few here and Levet and Yayax took it upon themselves making sure the garden didn't die. They are extremely sensitive to the touch and the whole flower will die if you touch even one petal. It made it very hard for us to care and keep the crop from dying out at first but with persistence, Levet and his boys, well you see. They have succeeded and the plants are thriving." Fives explained.

"Yeah, I know," Thea muttered, remember her experience with the yellow bud. Finding their way halfway between the house and the Lunar-Blossoms, Fives stopped and let go of Thea's arm.

"He didn't want to go on the Citadel mission," Fives began, his voice thick though trying valiantly to keep the emotion in check. "Echo had a bad feeling from the start, but like the dutiful trooper that he was, he followed the orders."

Thea shut her eyes. Yes, she remembered. Echo had called her with the most mournful expression she had ever seen. She should have known then. He had told her he was going on a mission and didn't know if or when he would be back and said goodbye.

"_There are no goodbyes Echo, only I'll see you later," _Thea had told him, _what a fool I was!_

"It is true," Fives said.

"What?" Thea perplexedly asked. What was he talking about?

"There are no goodbyes, not to someone you truly care about," Fives said as he lightly ran his hand over the tall, soft topped weeds. Thea's jaw just about fell to the ground and fumbled for something to say, but could not formulate a literate word. "Before you came into his life, Echo was all about manuals, codes and regulations. We both witnessed our brothers being killed on our first mission out. It changed him into a harder man and it was the first time I ever heard him question the regulations. It wouldn't be the last.

"You changed him for the better. You let him have a chance that not many of us clones get: a chance of normalcy, a chance for a vision of a future; a chance of love. I have a lot to be thankful for because of you and Echo."

Thea furrowed her brows in deeper confusion. "I don't understand."

"Thea," Fives gentle voice caressed her, sending soft tremors and goose bumps throughout her body. She felt him lightly cup her chin and then stroke back the loose strands of hair that had slipped out of her pony tail back behind her ear. It wasn't a sexual gesture, she knew that. It was one of comfort, sorrow and brotherly love. "Thea, you don't understand that you and Echo set the example for this whole thing to happen?"

"What thing Fives?" she trembled.

"If it wasn't for you and Echo, your unyielding love, the way he made sure to hear you one last time, the demand for a promise to be carried out, to make sure you knew that his love for you would always be strong, the lives you see here today would never exist. Rex, Cody, Ahsoka and I would probably all be dead."

"But Echo is dead," Thea pitifully whispered. "How did you get all that from us when we only said it once?"

"It doesn't matter how many times you say those words. It matters what is in the heart. Do you still love him?" Fives demanded.

"Always. I always will love him Fives," Thea strongly said.

"Then Echo will never be truly dead. He made me promise to make sure you knew that he loved you always and forever. He was a man of his word."

"Just as you are Fives," Thea lightly stroked his rough cheek that was covered in a few days' worth of stubble. "I know he loves me."

"I think all death has a purpose," Fives stepped back and looked out into the sea of gold. Thea could hear the tears in his voice. "At least I would like to think all death has a purpose. Echo created a long enough diversion to help us get to the spot where GAR ships could come and pick us up. He didn't intentionally want to leave you Thea, but perhaps while he saved us he wants you to save someone as well."

It was a curious thought that brought her to a halt. _Save someone? I can barely take care of myself, who would I be able to save? _One person entered her mind and a small gasp slipped through her lips, causing Fives to turn around. "Maybe you are right Fives."

They both stood in quiet silence before Thea made the motion to turn back to the house. "Thea, wait." She turned back and looked at him inquisitively. "Would you like to say the daily remembrance with me?" Thea felt warmth spread through and melt some of the cold that had been dominating her for so long.

"Fives, I am honored, but I am afraid I do not know the daily remembrance," she said apologetically.

"I'll say it first and then we can say it together. When we are done, we say the names of those who we want to remember. _Ni su'cuyi, gar kyr'adyc, ni partayli, gar darasuum._" Fives looked toward Thea.

"It's beautiful," she tenderly said. She waited until Fives started again and joined in. "_Ni su'cuyi, gar kyr'adyc, ni partayli, gar darasuum." _He paused. "Echo," Thea softly breathed his name. He slowly blinked and nodded and then continued with his own list of names. Thea listened quietly as he said the names of fallen brothers and comrades, almost loosing herself in the sound of his voice. When he was done, Thea actually felt the small of the corners of her lip tilt upwards in a very small smile. "That was lovely."

They made their way back to the house in a comfortable silence and before entering the home, Thea put a light hand on his shoulder halting him. "I think Ekho is a beautiful name for your daughter." The twinkle in Fives eyes was all that Thea needed.

* * *

><p><em> A little bit of peace for Thea. <em>

_Thank you all for reading and reviewing! Hope you keep enjoying the story. More to come =)_


	17. Chapter 17

"Did you ever see yourself as something other than a soldier Rex?" Cody curiously asked, breaking their silence as they worked alongside Levet, Jind and Dev. Rex had taken up where Cody had left off, raking and tilling the earth while Cody with his hand incapacitating him at the moment, watered where Jind and Dev planted the new seedlings. Jind and Dev both looked up from their work, but Levet kicked some dirt at their feet telling them to mind their business.

Pausing mid stroke, Rex reflected back when Fives asked him a similar question while they were still in the 501st together. _"__If you had the chance to start a new life as a new man and not as a solider of the Republic, would you take it?" _Fives had asked.

"_Are you talking about deserting soldier?" _Rex demanded.

"Rex?" Cody called to him. Rex turned dazed eyes onto his brother.

"No Cody, I didn't." He returned to raking the ground this time with a bit more force into it.

"Why not?"

"We were soldiers. That's all we ever knew. It was treason to think such a thing. And why would I want to dream of the hopeless and the unattainable?"

"How can you say it was unattainable when we're standing in a huge field on a planet without the Empire breathing down our necks planting seeds for the next set of crops?" Dev butted in.

"Or have at least some of our brothers and sisters here? I get it, it's not the GAR, or the company, battalion, squadron etc…that you grew up with or worked with, but it's better than nothing isn't it?" Jind excitedly insisted. "Come on Captain, you can't fool even a simple commando like me. You had some sort of dream of afterlife of the GAR."

Rex just blinked at the younger clone. "I would have to say you commandos are anything but simple." Jind and Dev grinned. Everyone by this time had stopped working even Levet who had his hands and chin resting on top of the rake, listening with interest on the conversation. "I'd like to think if I didn't set a goal for unrealistic hopes and dreams then I wouldn't be let down. I guess I was content of living with what I had, with what I could get within the life I was living right then and there."

"That's demoralizing, even for me," Cody grimaced.

"Way to go Captain," Jind sarcastically snorted. "Give your men a real dose of reality."

Rex lifted his lip in a snarl and lowered his brows in anger. Before he could reply Levet intervened, "The captain does have a valid point to some extent. We as clones have to live in the moment, on a day by day basis. It is hard for most to seek a future or want to give themselves a future. It is unfair, but it is how our makers made us. But there is nothing wrong with having a dream."

"Some men need that extra encouragement, need the aspiration of a life outside metal walls, rules, codes and death." Dev insisted.

"Beauty and freedom, laughter and jokes," Jind added.

"It can be taken away even outside the walls," Cody kicked at some of the dirt.

"At least you are outside the wall," Jind shot at the ex-commander.

"I was a man that lived day by day. I had morals, rules and I liked my walls. Despite the war I was safe within the GAR and I didn't need to see into the future because she always was standing in front of me." Rex returned to his work so that he didn't have to look at the curious and dumbfounded faces.

Rex was again halted from continuing when a foot got in his way. He looked up scowling into Cody's own perplexed and slightly sullen face. "Then how did you leave the captain behind?"

"I didn't. He followed," Rex admitted.

Clearly uncomfortable again, Jind and Dev couldn't work like this. As if they could read each other's minds, they threw down their rakes simultaneously and looked stubbornly at Rex, Cody and then to Levet. "Well, today you are not a captain or just a clone," Dev declared.

"Yes, today you are a farmer," Jind repeated. "And because we are commandos and just a bit bigger than you and probably can take you on, what we say goes."

"So forget all about the GAR, who's a captain, who's a commander and so forth and enjoy the air, the lack of bombs and guns going off and the simple chirp of a bird. Today, _Rex_," Dev emphasized on Rex's name, "you are a part of our farm. And let me be the first to…"

"Welcome you!" Jind quickly interrupted and deflected a blow from his brother.

"That was my line you shabuir," Dev made an attempt to hit him again when Jind took off in a run, leaving Rex and Cody stunned and baffled.

"What was that?" Cody exclaimed.

Levet turned back to continue his work and shrugged his shoulders. "Kids these days," the older clone joked, "They're good lads. They mean well and don't like to take the world too serious. Jind and Dev are right, you two are welcome anytime to join us."

Rex watched as the two commandos tackled each other into the dirt, laughing and yelling. They finally got back up and began walking over to the plow to do whatever it was they originally had intended to do before he had come to see Cody. _Can I ever be that free? Can I leave the captain behind? _Turning his attention back at hand Rex began to feel the belonging he once had within the 501st. _Today I can._

* * *

><p>"Who's that now?" Jind pointed toward the dust trail blooming in front of him and his brother.<p>

"It isn't Cov and Yover," Dev said lackadaisically as he twisted some more wires together in hopes of making the plow a little bit better than in its current state. "Can you make out what they look like?" It was few and far between when a stranger came onto the property. Most of the times they were quickly chased off, but once in a blue moon a di'kut would have the gall to challenge them. If Dev, Jind or any of Yayax saw Levet threatened, well the challenger wouldn't last very long.

Looking through his microbinoculars, Jind could see from quite a distance away and this person happened to be on a very familiar looking speeder bike. "That's Mereel's bike!"

"Let me see," Dev made a grab for the binoculars, but Jind swung away, keeping them out of his brother's grasp.

"I don't know who it is, but it looks to be a girl riding it, I think," Jind stood up from his seat and adjusted the binoculars.

"Mereel will have a fit knowing someone took his toy," Dev chuckled. "Think we should go over there?"

"She's slowing down by Levet. Rex and Cody are there so I think he'll be okay. Let's get this thing started and mosey over there like the good farmers we are."

* * *

><p><em>I trust you Rex…No that won't do. I love and trust you…Better but not right. Arg fighting a droid army with him was so much easier than just talking face to face. Rex, you're not alone in this struggle of unknowingness.<em> Ahsoka needed to talk to Rex, needed to tell him the thing that she had been struggling for so long to say and now racing out to see him, she didn't know if she could do it. _I'm a fool if I ever thought I was brave enough for this. Maybe that is why Master failed as well. _

Seeing some figures in the distance she pressed the speeder for more speed until the silhouettes became more than outlines and she could make out three distinct figures. Ahsoka recognized Rex and Cody, but the third she had yet to meet. Her anxieties beginning to get to her, Ahsoka slowed her approach until she was next to the three men. She raised her goggles and her face was rimmed with dust.

"Ahsoka," Rex said in surprise. Cody stared expressionlessly at the Jedi, unsure of her intentions. "What are you doing out here?"

Feeling her nerve start to slip, she looked from Rex, the unknown man and Cody who she couldn't tell if he was going to shoot her or turn his back and ignore her and then back at Rex. "I uh," she started lamely, "I needed to talk with you."

"I'm working right now," he cringed inside at how much of a jerk he sounded like.

"Oh, okay," she sounded dejected.

"Rex, go," Levet nodded for him to go and walk away from them. "We can handle it from here." The sound of the plow starting could be heard from the distance.

Rex slightly turned toward Cody who was now looking away from all of them. "Okay," he placed his rake down and held his hand out for the young girl to take. She dismounted the bike and they slowly walked away from the two commanders. "Cody," Levet called to him.

"What?" he asked sharply.

"In order for Rex to heal, he will need your forgiveness as well."

"What, what do you mean?" Cody bemusedly asked. "I have nothing to forgive. He already said what he wanted to say and so did I."

"Then why such spite?" Cody couldn't answer because it would be just a lie. "When you're ready son tell him."

Cody chewed on his bottom lip in contemplation. "Levet?"

"Hum?" the other man answered.

"How do you understand all this?"

"They don't call me Commander Tactful for nothing."

* * *

><p>Ahsoka didn't want to walk in silence and tried to convey in intelligible words why she was here. <em>Here goes…<em>

"I trust you Rex," she rushed out. _Well that's not exactly what I had in mind, but it's a good start. _

"But…" Rex let go of her hand and tucked his hands into his pockets.

"But what?"

"Ahsoka," Rex sighed exasperated; "there's always a but. What's the exception?"

She grabbed ahold of his shirt, pulling him to a stop. "There is no exception this time Rex," she said forcefully, "I trust you with everything that I have and I am. I have been a fool that it has taken me this long to realize it, but you know what? I'm learning. You're learning too. That's what teenagers and adults do. We never stop.

"I think I needed, and as weird as this sounds, need to see everything through the eyes of a teenager instead of the adult I pretend to be. And this teenager, soon to be adult trusts her man, trusts him with her life. Even if she thinks she has other ideas. Maybe you need to do the same thing."

"Ahsoka," Rex started heatedly ready to pick a fight, but then felt the energy drain. She was right. "I see through two different eyes- the captain and the man. Which one do you really trust?"

"I trust you Rex the whole you; that's all that matters," she tentatively took his hand. "I don't want to live in a life without you."

"You will one day Ahs'ika, sooner than later," he said softly.

"Then we shouldn't waist time anymore don't you think?" She asked hopefully.

"Do you love me Ashoka?" Rex asked abruptly.

"Yes," she answered without hesitation.

"Do you love the captain in me?"

"Yes."

"Do you love the man in me?"

"Yes Rex," she answered patiently, though curious as to where this was going.

"Then would you trust me enough if I asked you to be mine until I draw my last breath?" _It's unfair what you're asking Rex. You've both been on an emotional rollercoaster, you need to wait._ _I have to know though. I can't rid of the captain and be the man without knowing for sure. Or is it ridding the man and be the captain that's making you do this? Rex…you're testing her old man. Habits are hard to get rid of aren't they? _

_He's testing you Ahsoka, you should say no. But I want to be with him. If this is the only way to stay together, then I have to trust him. _"Yes Rex. Yes I'll be yours."

* * *

><p>Cody couldn't help but watch his brother and his Jedi walk off and then stop. "What are they talking about?" He mumbled to himself. Not normally one to pry, he couldn't help but wonder what was transpiring between the two. As he tried to turn his neck and look without making it look like he was looking, Cody caught Rex and the young Jedi embracing and sharing a kiss. Quickly turning back around and trying not to blush he glanced up to see Levet shaking his head.<p>

"What?" Cody snapped.

"Nothing," Levet answered simply.

"No, what is it?" Cody pressed and stopped what he was doing.

"You do not approve?"

"It's not that," Cody threw down the hose. Levet waited patiently for Cody to continue. "It just reminds me of different times. Times I am trying to rid of."

"Ah," Levet nodded.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Now he was getting angry. What did this commander know that Cody didn't now? "Levet, you aren't that much older than me, being a year older doesn't make you wiser."

"No, but observation and having my ears open does. You've had yours closed for a long time haven't you?" Cody shrugged his shoulders. For a strange reason Thea, the woman he had practically assaulted popped into his mind. _Maybe if I wasn't so closed off I wouldn't have done that. I need to see her. _

"I've done a lot of wrong in a short amount of time. I don't know if forgiveness is enough. Maybe that's why she was taken away from me."

"Cody, there's a reason for everything, but I highly doubt it was that. Perhaps though, now is the time for you to find redemption." The sound of the plow getting near, Levet began heading toward Jind and Dev who were controlling it. Cody jogged to catch up.

"Have you found yours?" Cody asked.

"In working this field; in looking after these boys, I am at peace."

"How do I find my peace?" Levet stopped and glanced toward Rex and Ahsoka who were walking back toward the speeder. Cody also glanced their way.

"When you can let go." The commander started walking again.

"But that may be never!" Cody shouted. "Dammit!" He cursed and kicked at the ground again. That temper tantrum sounded good right about now. _How am I supposed to let go? _Cody stopped kicking the dirt clots as once again Thea entered his mind. Her scared, but..._determined _look in her eyes, the way she was about to fight him if anything escalated, there was something about her that wouldn't let him forget. He had to make his amends before it was too late. _It might be too late Cody. No, it's never too late to make some right in this forsaken world. _

* * *

><p>Ahsoka had wrapped her arms securely around Rex's strong waist, her cheek firmly pressed against the flat of his back as they rode back to the house, lost deep in thought. <em>I will be his, I have always been his. <em>Ahsoka lifted her cheek off his back when she felt the speeder slowing down and was confused as they came to a complete stop.

"Rex?" She asked. He didn't reply right away and just sat still.

"I shouldn't have tested you," his voice seemed to echo in her ears.

"You didn't," she lied.

He twisted around to peer at her. "Jedi aren't supposed to lie."

"I'm not just a Jedi, I'm also a young woman," she retorted. "What's the matter Rex? Really, tell me." He slid off the bike and out of her grasp, her fingers becoming cold at the lost of contact.

"It shouldn't have to be this way. I should have asked you when we both meant it. Not to test the trust you have in me and I have in you," Rex paced. The words jarred Ahsoka and she dismounted the bike and stood in front of Rex, forcing him to stop in his tracks.

"Don't you dare Rex. Don't you dare take it back." She burned.

"We're not ready, you even said so yourself. You're not ready to be a wife, I am not ready to let go of being the captain. Perhaps I should have stayed." Made with quick reflexes did nothing to help prevent the intense stinging sensation on the side of his face. Ahsoka had only struck him one time, the night of Order 66 when passions and emotions were running rapid. It was something he did not want to experience again, but here he stood, rubbing his sore cheek and staring wide eyed at the girl.

Ahsoka was panting heavily and her palm stung where it had made contact with Rex's face. Her blue eyes blazed with fervent vigor and she was ready to strike again. "You bastard," she growled. "How dare you. How dare you toy with me! Why didn't you Rex? Why didn't you just stay? Let's just get this out in the open. You wanted to shoot me didn't you? You wanted to be the good _captain_ and shoot me!" She screamed at him, causing Rex to flinch. "I wish you had. It would have been a lot less painful than this!" Ahsoka launched herself at him, punching him in the chest with her fists. Rex let her hit him a few times and then caught her wrists into his large hands. "Let go you clone!" She yelled at him. Ahsoka twisted and pulled against him, but with less enthusiasm than before. "Let go," she whimpered and hung limp. He lowered her to the ground and wrapped her into his arms. She did not return the embrace, but buried her face into the crook of his shoulder.

"Let go," Ahsoka muttered into his ear.

"Of you, never." Rex rested his head against hers and lightly stroked her delicate lekku. "Marry me?" He asked again.

Ahsoka closed her eyes, feeling so very tired. She couldn't say no, even after their tirade. "I am yours Rex."

"As I am yours Ahs'ika."

* * *

><p><em>There's a lot going on! I hope this chapter wasn't too much of a bummer-but the next few should be good a juicy! lol.<em>

_Thank you all for your reviews! They are always appreciated =)_

_Stay tuned for more-Cody and Thea are coming up! _


	18. Chapter 18

_"Because God is never cruel, there is a reason for all things. We must know the pain of loss; because if we never knew it, we would have no compassion for others, and we would become monsters of self-regard, creatures of unalloyed self-interest. The terrible pain of loss teaches humility to our prideful kind, has the power to soften uncaring hearts, to make a better person of a good one."_

_-Dean Koontz, The Darkest Evening of the Year_

* * *

><p>Walking back to the home from the field probably wasn't the brightest plan Cody ever had, but it wasn't the first time he had walked a long distance and compared to many of the missions he had been on, this wasn't even that long. Cody could have snagged a ride back with Rex and his Jedi, but then he would be in the company of <em>her<em> and he wasn't ready for that just yet. It wasn't that he completely hated the Jedi; actually he didn't hate the Jedi at all. Something inside of him made Cody extra defensive and cold toward Ahsoka. He'd be lying to himself if he said he didn't know what it was. Ahsoka was a very good friend of Barriss, best friends and she held memories of his dearly beloved. Cody was too much of a coward and too prideful to ask Ahsoka to share her memories of Barriss with him, especially in the last few months before the Order. He was also jealous that she had made it out alive with Rex when Barriss had not.

_Barriss was a beautiful soul, a fighter to the end and cared for everyone, she deserved to live. It's not fair. _

Plus this would give him plenty of time to think of something hopefully passable and convincing to say to the woman, Thea. _Not just convincing, but heartfelt. Heartfelt…_Cody scrunched his nose in discontent, _why should I care if it's heartfelt? Because you di'kut you care that you hurt an innocent, an innocent that was only trying to help you. _As he shuffled along the dirt and tall wheat-like grasses, skimming his hand on their feathery tops, an odd sensation coursed through his belly.

_Why would she want to help a __shabiir_ _like me? _ Cody recalled what the woman looked like. Not terribly tall, but not short and fiery red hair _to match her fiery temperament, _Cody snorted. He recalled a long jagged scar running across her face and if it wasn't for that he could have sworn she was attractive enough to be a model. Well at least in his eyes. And her figure despite that baggy fight suit, he caught a glimpse of her nice round bre…_Wait…whoa halt it there boy! _Cody stumbled to a stop, gripping a handful of the tall grasses and caught himself from completely falling.

_You did not just think that,_ he scolded himself. _Haven't you learned? Hasn't everyone hurt you enough? A warm body does not make for a warm soul! _A low growl formed at the back of his throat and his grip tightened on the defenseless plant. _They'll only hurt you again. You'll only get another cut in the end. _The veins in his neck and wrists started to strain against his skin as his fury with himself built until the inevitable boiling point hit its apex. The unfortunate weeds had become the victim of Cody's wrath as he pulled them from the earth they grew and were tossed along as far as he could throw them. A roar of unconfined ferocity bellowed deep from his throat and kept it up until his vocal cords hurt.

When his voice finally became hoarse, Cody stopped and took in a few heavy and deep breaths. He actually felt a little better, but it didn't resolve his issue that was waiting for him back at the house. _I'll tell her I'm sorry and that should be good enough. Then I am getting off this stinking planet. _As Cody started forward he knew that it wouldn't be enough and that he wouldn't be leaving. _Barriss…_Cody's heart clenched at the thought of her. Oh how he wished she was here, wished he could hear the sound of her sweet and soothing voice.

"What am I supposed to do sweetheart?" he asked out loud. "What am I supposed to say? Where am I supposed to go from here?" Only the soft sounds of the gentle breeze whistling through the tall weeds answered him back.

* * *

><p>Having not been able to get back to her ship yet for some much needed personal supplies, Thea had no change of clothes so she had not been able to take a shower yet. Seeing her discomfort, Fives had asked her if she would like to borrow some of Bella's clothing (non- maternity kind) for the time being. Trying to hide her embarrassment, Thea graciously thanked Fives and Bella for the loan and rushed into the borrowed room and turned on the shower. Lavishing under the hot water, Thea let the steam and warmth of the water soak into her tense and tired muscles.<p>

* * *

><p>"Have you seen Thea?" Jusik asked Fives since Fives was the last to been seen with the pilot. Fives finished chewing his last bit of bagel and eyed the Jedi-Mando.<p>

"What do you want with her Bardan?" Fives wasn't going to mess around with words. Bardan Jusik had been nothing but faithful and trustworthy, but Thea was his brother's girl and dead or alive, Echo's brotherhood came first to Fives.

Immediately sensing the path that this was heading, Jusik needed to put a halt to this train of thought. "I'm only trying to help her as a friend, Fives. I would never take advantage of that."

"Good, because I would have to kick your shebs from one end of Manda'yaim and back if you hurt her," Fives said it seriously and put a bit of the deadly ARC edge to it, but there was also a hint of humor in his honeyed eyes.

"Glad we're on the same page cause I would do the same thing if I were in your shoes," Jusik grabbed Fives by the elbow and Fives returning the grip in a Mando custom shake.

* * *

><p>After a few more quick words with Fives and telling Jusik that Thea was in her room, Jusik knocked on her door but there was no answer. Frowning, he knocked harder. "Thea?" He called out and again no answer. She was either asleep, not there or refusing to answer.<p>

A worried thought crossed his mind if she did something to herself or was actually unconscious and couldn't answer him. Biting the bottom of his lip, Jusik slowly opened her door and entered. "Thea…?"

* * *

><p>Her stomach tired of being ignored for almost two days, growled angrily alerting its owner that it was hungry and in need of some sort of nourishment. Turning off the wonderful warm water Thea stepped out of the tub and began to dry herself off. Wrapping the towel around her body, she searched for the borrowed clothes she swore she brought in with her. "Kest," she cursed under her breath and opened the refresher door and just as she began to step out a familiar voice filled the room.<p>

"Thea?" Jusik entered the bedroom just as she did and they both stared at each other with wide, disbelieving eyes.

"What are you doing in here!" She screeched and ran back into the refresher, slamming the door shut.

The Jedi was snapped out of his stupor at the sound of the door slamming. "I…I wanted to check on you and make sure you were okay," he answered quite lamely.

"Well as you can see I am okay so you can leave now!" Her voice was muffled behind the door, but she didn't sound pleased with him one bit. Without a word, Jusik turned to leave when she stopped him._ Trust, try and trust him. _ "Wait." He halted mid step and waited. "Hand me the clothes on the bed will you please?" Jusik swirled around on his heel and saw the clothes laid out on the bed. He recognized these-he had seen Bella wear them a time before.

"Aren't these Bella's?" He asked.

Hearing an irritated sigh from the other side, he picked them up and then knocked and the door slowly opened. He could see her peek through and caught a glimpse of some wet red strands and her very white shoulder. Jusik also caught what looked to be discolored streaks contrasting against her shoulder. Her arm reached out and quickly snatched the clothes and the door once again slammed in his face.

"Yes they are Bella's," she answered. "I haven't been able to get to my ship yet and get my personal items."

"We can go there after you get dressed if you want to," Jusik offered.

"We?" her voice rose in skepticism.

"Well you," Jusik corrected. _Stupid, stupid di'kut, _he cursed himself. Jusik couldn't ever recall being this much of a bumbling idiot around a person before. After mentally banging his head on the wall he heard the door reopen and Thea stood before him with the fresh afterglow of her shower. Her hair still wet, it looked like long bloodied tresses instead of the fiery wave he was used to seeing.

She had specifically requested from Fives if Bella had any long sleeved blouses and something that would completely cover her legs and what he brought her did just that though she would have chosen something a bit more conventional.

Jusik had to be very careful not to gawk, but apparently ducking his head and turning away didn't hide the red blush creeping up his neck. Dressed in a turquoise blouse made of a satiny type material, the shirt shimmered when she stirred even the littlest of movements. It covered her in all the places she needed but also clung to her thin figure bringing out her womanly curves, though a little bit baggy around her chest. _This is definitely made for a more…voluptuous woman_ Thea crossed her arm over her chest as she stood awkwardly in front of Jusik. It was a beautiful blouse and Thea imagined that it probably looked outstanding on a woman such as Bella. The light tan long skirt complemented it very well, but Thea was not used to wearing such _girly _clothes. The skirt was made of the softest cotton and swayed easily with her movement. Bella must have tossed in a belt as well knowing Thea would need one with the outfit, for the iridescent belt was perfect.

_Well at least I'm covered and clean,_ Thea thought optimistically. Her stomach rumbled again loud enough for even Jusik to hear. She quickly brushed past him, her wet hair gently striking his plated arm and leaving a trail of water behind. He watched her as she sat down on the bed and put on her boots, her hair falling into her face and she swatted it irritably out of the way, it making a slapping sound as it landed on her back.

"Do you want something to eat?" Jusik asked from where he stood.

"No, I'm fine," she said abruptly. _Starving…why won't you take his generosity? Because it makes you that much more comfortable in his presence and your guard that much more down. _

"I think your stomach is disagreeing. Come on, Laseema and the girls made a wonderful brunch." He held out his hand for Thea to take and she eyed it cautiously. "No one will hurt you here Thea. You're safe." She looked into his blue eyes and softened her gaze. All she saw in his crystal sapphires was possibility and patience.

"You do realize that I cannot love another person Bardan," Thea placed her small hand into his larger one. They fit together like a glove, but the notion did nothing to stop her from saying the next set of words, "If you are thinking you can help me find love once again, please do not wait for me." He should have been surprised at the mention of her thinking of him loving her. He should have known, should have accepted it right then and there without any questioning, but he didn't.

"What if I want to? What if I want to wait a life time and help you in your search? I would do that for you." Many emotions played through Thea's dark chocolate eyes and she expertly schooled them to land on neutral. Pursing her rosy lips together in a thin line, she shook her head in a negative way. Perhaps she sensed this was coming and this is how she protected herself. Either way, Jusik hid his disappointment well. He could hear Fives voice in the back of his mind, telling him that Thea was Echo's, but he wanted to help her move on. She needed to be released one day.

"Be my friend, Bardan. I can like a friend but I cannot love a partner." It was almost a plea. If that's the best and closest he was going to get from her, then Jusik would take it with as much understanding he could. He took a hard swallow and nodded. "There are better, kinder and less tainted women out there, one for you, Bardan. But I am glad that I have you as my friend." With that she gave his hand a soft squeeze and walked out of the bedroom.

Before he followed her, Jusik brought the hand that she had been holding to his chest and lightly flexed it. "I cannot promise I won't love you, at least in the secrets of my own, but I can promise I will be the friend you need," he murmured.

* * *

><p>First I wanted to give a BIG thank you to everyone who has taken the time to read and review this story so far!<p>

**Queen, Laloga, Jedi-Padawan14, Jess Marylin, Jadedsnowtiger, Janizary, DoubleEO, Sachariah **and if I forgot to list you I totally apologize but I really appreciate your awesomeness.

So I know I said there was going to be juiciness and there is! It's coming. Cody and Thea are coming up and so much more! I have a sweet Interlude next-sort a Valentines Interlude so sweet it'll rot your teeth j/k. But it'll let everyone take a quick breather from all this craziness!

Hope you continue to enjoy! As always your reviews and thoughts are welcome! =)


	19. Chapter 19

_Hi All,_

_I wrote this chapter like 20x's (not joking) and I believe it came out okay. Not much Rex/Ahsoka in this one, but they will have more in the next coming chapters._

_BTW, the rating does goes up toward the end, so reader disgression is advised. _

_Thank you to all the reviewers especially to Sachariah who has helped me out with my spelling! (I'm sure there will be more =)_

_As always I hope you enjoy and please review! _

* * *

><p>Cody paused before entering the home, rolling his shoulders back and letting out an anxiety filled sigh. <em>You've shot down your general and faced death in the eye and yet you're nervous about facing a woman. It's not like you never talked to a girl before, yet you've never came close to assaulting one before either. That is unless you count Ventress…no I don't. Suck it up son, you're a man of war, you can handle a little scorn. Maybe…<em>

Cody gritted his teeth and entered the large home, his heart now crawling up into his throat and walked right into a conversation with Thea and the Jedi Bardan Jusik. _Of course it had to be the Jedi_ Cody mentally groused. All three of them froze, Cody staring at Thea and Thea and Jusik staring incredulously at Cody.

"I uh," Cody found himself fumbling. _Pull it together, you were a commander in the Grand Army you __or'dinii. You could talk to politicians and Jedi generals, but you can't talk to this woman? What is wrong with you!_ "I was just heading back to my room," he rushed.

"Don't you have something to say to me?" Thea's sharp voice cut like a lightsaber through alloy metal.

The back of Cody's hairs bristled; nobody talked to him like that. _You owe her…get over it, _but instead he indignantly retorted, "Not in front of him I don't." Thea stood up and narrowed her incensed eyes at the man. Before she could say anything, a warm hand was placed over hers.

Knowing that nothing would be resolved and things would only escalate if a peace wasn't made temporarily, Jusik put his male pride aside. "I'll leave Thea," Jusik said gently, but then turned a fierce and protective gaze at Cody.

"No Bardan, stay, we're all adults here aren't we _Commander?_" Thea narrowed her eyes at Cody and placed her hand on top of Jusik's, halting his movement. There was no hiding the fact that Cody was fuming and he was trapped. A very bad combination for Cody.

"Are you looking for a fight?" Cody growled.

"I think I found one," Thea bowed her head slightly and rolled her eyes scathingly toward him, giving her somewhat more of a sinister look to her modelesque face. Thea stood up, pushing her chair out from under her, readying for a fight; much to Cody astonishment. He had to hand it to the woman, she was a spitfire.

"Stop, stop it right now!" Jusik jumped up and spread out his arms in mock separation. "You," he pointed an accusing finger at Cody, "apologize right now."

"In front of a Jedi?" Cody scoffed.

"Do I really need to punch you?" Jusik threatened.

"That's not very Jedi of you, you Mando wanna be," Cody sarcastically spat.

"I'm not feeling very Jedi-like!" Jusik pushed off his booted feet and made a move toward Cody and Cody did the same. Both men were completely taken off guard as the smaller woman jumped in between the two disputing "bulls."

"Bardan, go, get out of this room," Thea said a bit harsher than she meant it. She appreciated his valor, but the testosterone was just getting a big too suffocating for her. He looked down at her with blazing blue eyes and was about to protest. In a softer tone she said, "It'll be okay. We'll work this out without bloodshed."

"You shouldn't be left alone with _him,_" Jusik snarled.

Thea really wanted to roll her eyes, but again patted his plated chest. "Go. I'll scream really loud if something happens. Someone is bound to hear."

Jusik turned an ice blue stare back onto Cody. "Try something I just dare you," he fisted his hands by his side in contained fury.

"Wouldn't think of it Boss," Cody shrugged.

"Thea…" Jusik tried once more.

"Friends are supposed to trust each other, so please Bardan, trust me," Thea lightly squeezed his arm where his armor was not covering. After a moment, she could see his blond head give a faint nod and started out of the kitchen. He paused right next to Cody, shoulder to shoulder.

"Would you even know what an angel looks like if the Force put one into the palm of your hand, you di'kut? Probably not, after all you are just a clone."

Cody froze in place and before he got his mind together to react, Jusik was gone. He turned back to the hardened face of Thea. _Could this go any worse?_

"Well, don't you want to say something to me?"

"I need an ice pack and to sit down first. A couple of pain killers would be nice as well. I might be a little more pleasant so if you want to find those for me, then I might be more inclined to talk. I've been walking all day and my hand is killing me," Cody waved his bloodied stained wrap in front of her face and walked over to the freezer unit to look for some ice. Thea was aghast at this man's behavior toward her. How could he be so…cold and uncaring? Well, she did know by unfortunate experience in her past that she would rather forget, but this man, this particular clone, owed her an apology and by Sith she was going to get it.

"Hey!" She ran around the table and forced the freezer door shut to much of Cody's surprise, but quickly schooled his features to one of annoyance. "Who do you think you are?" Thea demanded shoving Cody by the shoulder and then poked him in the chest to emphasize her point. Cody looked down at the finger still jabbed in his chest and then let his honeyed eyes travel the length of her turquoise colored arm, up to her neck and then settled on her pouting lips. He lingered there for a few moments and then heard her feet shift from one to another, realizing his gaze lingered longer than necessary. Finally making his way up he landed on her irate, but uneasy eyes.

"Me?" Cody replied coolly. "Who do you think I am?"

Thea was clearly not expecting her question turned back on her. She shifted from one foot to the other again and lightly clutched the material of her skirt to keep her hand from twitching with nerves. "I'm not here for guessing games _Commander_ I want an apology from you." She quickly went on the defensive side.

Taking the anger, frustration and blame out of this argument, Cody actually took a step back for a moment and really looked at the woman in front of him. He had a good judge of character; he had to in order to make potentially good men into great soldiers. As he observed Thea, as she stared into his face, it wasn't just him that she was seeking an apology from. No, it was something much, much more. He had to calm himself as well, he would never heal, never get anywhere but backwards if he continued down the path of self-destruction.

"It's Cody," he stepped closer to the woman causing Thea to instinctively stumble backwards.

"What?" She bemusedly asked as she regained her balance.

"Not Commander, just Cody. And I'm sorry." Thea hadn't actually thought that he was going to apologize, not after that horrible argument moments ago, but he had. She had expected more fighting, blame thrown back into her face, degrading names called and eventually retreat into their rightful corners to lick oozing wounds. Something about him had completely softened in a blink of an eye. His whole face relaxed, his honeyed- auburn eyes seemed…kinder and what was going on? Thea was confused and now very skeptical. He wanted something.

"You're sorry?" She doubtfully asked.

Cody took another step closer and Thea took another step back. He furrowed his brows together. "I didn't mean to hurt you which I can tell I have." Noticing her knuckles had gone completely white from her tightly clenching hands on the skirt, he asked carefully, "Are you that scared of me?"

Thea jutted her chin out smugly and rolled her shoulders back trying to make herself look bigger and prouder, but Cody was no fool. He could see it around the lines by her eyes, the false stiff movements and the obvious way she kept moving away from him. "Men can't scare me anymore," she snarled.

_What is that supposed to mean?_ Cody thought confused. "I meant every word Thea, I am sorry for what I did. We all have demons; mine seem to overpower me."

"That's not an excuse to hurt someone," she admonished

"No, it's not," he agreed.

"Walk with me?" Thea asked.

_Huh?_ Cody didn't understand, maybe he would never understand. Wasn't she mad and unsure of him a second ago? "What?"

Thea gave a little sigh through her nose. "To my ship, walk with me to my ship. We still need to talk and I need to get some personal things before the day is over."

His hand really needed medical attention and his feet ached, but he could not and would not pass up this opportunity to make amends. "Okay." He said simply.

Before making their way out of the house, Jusik and Fives caught Cody and Thea leaving together. "Do you really think that's safe?" Fives pulled Thea off to the side as Jusik frowned and watched at Cody. Cody chose to ignore both men and look toward the door and focus on a vacant spot in the field. Thea glanced at Cody and then back at Fives.

"He won't do anything Fives." Fives deeply frowned at the ex-commander, but at Thea's gentle hand against his cheek brought his attention back on them. "There's a purpose for everything and as you said perhaps I'm here to save someone too."

"You think you should save him?" Fives asked in disbelief.

Thea shrugged her shoulders. "Who's to judge? Maybe he'll save me too. Or maybe I'll just give him a good smack on the head," that made Fives slightly grin.

"I don't want you to go alone with him Thea," Fives sternly said.

"As I told Bardan, I'll scream really loud. There are enough of you around here with great hearing if I need it. I'm a big girl and can take care of myself; I have been for a long time now."

"Wait here for a minute," Fives lightly commanded. Thea nodded and watched his retreating back as he walked over to Cody and Jusik. _Please don't start anything…_She silently prayed.

In his other life Fives looked up to this man as a mentor, a leader as someone he wanted to be someday. Now, now Cody was the one who needed a mentor and the guidance. There were no longer ranks that separated the man but honor and dignity.

Taking Cody by the arm, Fives pushed the older clone so that he was against the wall. "Got something to say to me, boy?" Cody leered. Jusik pushed himself away from his spot and walked over to Fives side. Cody snarled at the Jedi.

Fives willed the desire of hitting Cody away. "I'm only going to say this once Cody so listen. You hurt her and you'll wish you stayed with the Empire. You'll finally learn what pain is."

Cody's eyes seemed to glow and shrugged out of Fives grasp. "What do you know about causing pain Fives? I've been to hell and back and I've seem to be stuck somewhere in between." He brushed past Jusik and Fives, but Jusik caught Cody by the shoulder. "Get your hand off me Jedi," Cody warned.

Jusik's sapphire orbs shinned brightly in a deadly passionate blaze. Cody suddenly felt very small standing next to the Jedi, though he would never admit that. "Go on Cody, test me. Hurt her I beg you."

"I won't hurt her." They glared at each other and Cody wondered if he was using his Jedi powers to see if Cody was lying. Jusik's frown deepened, but his eyes saddened which confused Cody even more. "Haar'chak," Jusik swore, "I know you won't." Cody was left standing speechless and a bit flustered.

"Bardan," Thea called out to Jusik before he disappeared into the house. He stopped, but did not look at her. She lightly took a hold of his arm where his armor did not cover and ran her hand down the rough material. He was thankful she should not feel the shiver of goose bumps that one stroke caused.

"I'm your friend Thea, I'm here to help," he said hoarsely.

"Thank you she softly replied. With that he broke from her grasp and in search for a much needed drink.

Thea slowly approached the two men and looked questionably at them. "Ready?" Cody looked at Fives.

"I promise," he look intently at the younger man and for once Fives felt like he could trust the ex-commander.

Cody and Thea exited the house and she jogged down the steps. Turning and giving a sideways glance at the man next to her, she asked, "I promise what?"

"I promise what, what?" He dodged. Instead he took great notice of the shimmering turquoise blouse and the way it made her already fiery red hair blossom. The long skirt while hiding her legs rolled over her nice round bum…_Watch it son…_

Thea rolled her eyes. "Come on, don't play games, what did he say to you?"

"Man stuff," Cody shortly said and he wasn't going to go into detail. Seeing this, Thea quit asking. They entered the long grass and Cody held out his uninjured his hand out to Thea to take so she wouldn't fall which she only eyed suspiciously. "I don't bite."

"I beg the differ," she scoffed as she walked passed him. "And don't try anything, you'll be very sorry!" She shouted over her shoulder.

For the second time in less than ten minutes, Cody was left flustered. Cody couldn't decide to snarl or laugh and came out as a choked up cough as he followed closely behind. "I wouldn't dream of it knowing you have a Jedi to back you up!"

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"Nothing," he snorted.

"No, wait," Thea stopped and put a halting hand on his chest. "What are you implying? Are you saying that Bardan and I are something?" When Cody didn't answer but raised a dark brow, a shadow crossed Thea's scarred face. "A man and a woman can't be friends?"

"Not the way that he looks at you, he wants more."

"You men, especially you clone men, always thinking with the little head instead of the big head!" She growled disgustedly and walked off in revulsion. Thea winced when his strong, hard hand grabbed her by the elbow and forced her to turn around and look at his furious face.

"You want to repeat that?" He said darkly.

"I said you are a droyk!" she spat. Cody didn't know what a droyk was but it couldn't have been very nice. "I thought you were sorry you used yours against me," Thea pointed to his groin and Cody's eyes widened, "but apparently not. You're all the same." She tried to shrug out his grasp, but Cody held firm. "Let go."

"No."

"I said let go now."

This time he did, but he was the one to point the accusing finger at Thea. "We're going to get things out in the open right here right now. I would never force myself on you. Ever."

"Oh really, did you already have a lapse in memory? I thought all clones were built with perfect recollection." Thea nastily scathed. She hated herself right now. She hated that she was berating the very idea of what Echo was. _But Echo was so much more than a clone. _

"I am more than a clone Thea," Cody said eloquently.

"Are you?" She returned in the same tone turning around and broke into a run toward her ship. Cody was not going to let her get away with the last thought or word and took off after her.

"Hey! He called out after her. Thea glared at him as she waited for the hatch to open to her ship and then jogged up the stairs, Cody hot on her heels. "Hey, stop," he demanded. "If I am just a clone to you, what do you think Fives is, or Rex, or any of the others here? Or Echo for that matter? You were Echo's girl weren't you?"

Thea whirled around, her hair flying to the side though some strands sticking to her mouth and covering her face like bloody stripes. "Echo was, is a man. Will always be a man."

"I am a man," Cody stepped closer and was surprised to see that she didn't retreat from him this time.

"You are a clone, just like the others," she throatily replied.

He dared to take another step closer and again she remained still. "I am a man," he repeated, "I have known love. I have known loss and I know pain. I may not be a commander anymore, may have done some scummy things in my past, but I am here now taking baby steps to find that redemption." He took one more step and he stood right in front of her. Thea turned her head slightly so that she was looking at his shoulder and not into his intense gaze, but he placed two fingers under her tight jaw and made her look at him. Cody forced the anger and resentment away and softened his indignant filled eyes. "I am sorry."

"Which part?" She whispered.

"For everything." Her eyes widened as he started to bend down toward her and she placed her hands against his chest, giving him a hard enough shove to put some distance between them.

"You're emotions are getting the best of you _Commander_," Thea slipped passed by Cody and looked for her duffle. "It's been a tense half hour, but I don't want any of that testosterone on board this ship."

Sighing, Cody leaned against the bulkhead and watched the woman as she busied herself collecting clothes and items and shoving them inside her duffle bag. He would not let him rise to the bait. Instead he asked, "Why do you keep running?"

"Because there is always something to run from," Thea answered dispassionately.

"Then why does an apology matter so much to you?"

Thea paused and with her back to him she answered, "It's what a man would do, not a clone."

That statement made Cody stand upright. "I am a man," he said strongly.

"As you mentioned before." Thea looked around the ship checking to make sure she had everything she needed. Slugging the strap over her shoulder she turned to Cody and looked at him tiredly. "You know what makes the difference between clone and man, at least in my eyes?" Cody folded his arms across his chest and waited. "Patience, using tender words and knowing what love is."

"I knew what love was," Cody murmured, dropping his hands to his side.

"Do you know what love is now?" Thea walked up to him and asked.

"No."

"Me neither." Thea pursed her lips together. "I guess I'm no more human than you."

"But we're no less human because of it Thea. We have loved before," Cody again followed her out of the ship and they watched as the hatch closed. He wrapped his fingers around the strap of her duffle and slid it off her arm, gently stoking the silky material of her blouse. They both shivered at the contact. "Would you ever want to love again?"

"I can't." She answered sadly.

"Same here."

As they slowly made their way back, Thea gave Cody a side long glance. "What?" he asked.

"Apology accepted," she smiled faintly and if this day wasn't full of enough surprises, Cody felt the softness of her hand tangle with his.

* * *

><p>It was late in the afternoon by the time Rex and Ahsoka made it back…home? Home was such an odd word for both of them to use because none of them really had one. The GAR barracks, The <em>Resolute<em> and where ever his general had made camp for the night had been Rex's home. Then when sixty-six hit home was where ever he and Ahsoka could be together. Saleucami, now it was Mandalore.

Ahsoka, it was the same except the Jedi Temple had a sleeping pallet for her. They sat on the speeder together, Ahsoka's arms still tightly wrapped around Rex's strong torso and her cheek pressed upon his back. She could feel his shallows breaths go in and out with every breath he took and finally he shifted off the bike, breaking their contact. Holding out a hand, he offered to help her off the bike. Normally she would give him a sarcastic comment about not being an invalid or a needy little girl, but she did need him and he needed to care for her.

"Rex," Fives spotted the ex-captain and Jedi through the screen door. "I'm glad you're finally here. I can explain now why I have called you here." Wearily looking back at Ahsoka, Rex wasn't sure if he was ready for another blow to his war-torn heart.

* * *

><p>Sitting in the living room with their mouths agape, Rex, Cody and Ahsoka looked disbelieving at the ARC trooper.<p>

"Bull pucky," Cody was the first to break the silence. Thea looked at the three astonished faces, not fully comprehending the significance of this miracle.

"So it slows down your aging," she hesitantly said. Fives turned toward Thea.

"It not only slows down our aging Thea," Fives explained, "but gives us clones a chance for a full life."

Thea didn't say anything, but Cody could clearly hear her teeth grinding together. "Excuse me," she dismissed herself. They watched her leave and heard a door slam shut. Cody resisted the urge to go after her and turned his attention back at Fives.

"So what do we have to do?" Rex hoarsely asked, finally finding his voice.

"Nothing, it's just a shot. It'll make you sick for a few days, but after that its years of life ahead of you," Fives voice began to grow with excitement. Rex turned to Ahsoka to see the restrained excitement and fear dance within her crystal eyes.

"I have to think about this Fives," Rex said. Fives looked at his friend as if he had two heads, but didn't question him. He turned to Cody who had not said anything and looked to still be in shock.

"Cody? What about you?"

"You trust me enough to have a full life?"

"Cody…" Rex said sharply.

"No Rex, I don't want it. Who would care if I lived past thirty anyway?" With that, Cody pushed himself off the couch and headed in the direction Thea went.

"The offer is open Rex, will always be open for you and Cody. Just say the word."

"Thank you Fives, I just need some time to think about it," the ARC trooper nodded his head in understanding and left the couple to themselves.

* * *

><p>At the sound of a knock, Thea rolled her eyes and let out a groan. <em>Doesn't anyone know what a closed door means?<em> "Come in," she called.

Cody entered and hesitantly approached her bed. Thea had curled herself up upon the mattress and was facing the wall. She felt the cushion shift as a heavier body sat down. Peering up, she looked to see Cody fiddling with the wrap on his injured hand.

"You said yes didn't you?" Thea asked without looking at him. When he didn't answer, she balanced on her arm and lifted herself up to study him. "You said yes…"

"No. I said no." Cody tersely answered. Thea abruptly sat up and folded her legs under her skirt and looked both angry and bewildered.

"May I ask why? Are you daft in the head or something?"

Cody let out an irritated hiss and scowled at her. "No."

"Is that the word of the day or something, come on, tell me why you would choose to reject a chance at a full life."

Skimming his eyes along the skirt and then up her chest, finally resting on her blazing eyes, Cody sighed. "Who would I live for?" _Not what, but who,_ Thea caught instantly and the anger at him deflated.

_Yes, who indeed? Well, me…_Thea immediately shut that thought down and took a minute to reply. There was more to this man than he wanted to let on, but she was no fool. So much like her lost love, yet so different at the same time. A scar over his youthful yet war-weathered face, lines of worry and angst and old laughter permanently creased his forehead and his coffee colored eyes. Cody was built like Echo, but carried himself as if heavy masses were constantly trying to weigh him down and he fought to stand upright. A ferocity, intensity, proudness and yet a longing for something or someone exuded him where as Echo was proud but humble.

"You're staring," Cody murmured.

"Oops, sorry," Thea blushed and rubbed her tired eyes in hopes her blush wasn't as red as it felt.

"It's okay," Cody said awkwardly. "I can see why the Jedi likes you."

"Cody…" Thea warned.

"I know, I know, you're just friends." Cody again toyed with the wrap on his hand.

"Stop it," Thea scolded.

"What?"

"Your hand, why don't you just have Bardan or Ahsoka heal it?"

"No Jedi." Cody said sharply. She wanted to argue the point that his hand would be healed in no time, like Rex's if he would just give into his pride, but sometimes she realized a man only had his pride, no matter how ridiculous they may seem to others. Thea dropped the topic for now.

"Thea, could we ever be friends?"

Thea rested her chin into her palms and contemplated the question. "Can you be a good friend Cody?"

"I can be the best friend you ever had," he said deadpan.

_Maybe I can help him after all…maybe that's why I am here, why I am staying. _Thea could feel one block of ice actually chip off her frozen heart.

"I think I would like that, very much."

"Me too," Cody smiled.

* * *

><p>Ahsoka and Rex made it out to the deck and as Ahsoka propped herself up on the railing, she watched as Rex flopped himself on the old wicker chair and covered his eyes with his hand.<p>

"Aren't you going to ask me?" Rex murmured.

"Do I have to?" Ahsoka retorted. Rex removed his hand and looked exhaustingly at the young woman.

"No I guess not. I never imagined that a cure would really be found to reverse the rapid aging gene," Rex said dazedly.

"Was that a hopeful dream or now a real nightmare Rex?" Ahsoka asked straight-faced.

"I can't believe you just said that," Rex exclaimed. "How could you say that?" Ahsoka shrugged. It had just popped into her head, but she needed to know. Now that he could have full life, would he want it with her? Rex pushed himself off the bench and was standing between her legs, their noses only an inch apart from each other. "You think I'm going to leave you don't you?" Ahsoka nodded. "Why would I want to leave you?"

"Why would you want to stay with a nervous wreck like me when you could probably find a confident girl like Bella or Besany?" Ahsoka sat back a little so they were no long nose to nose with each other. "I think you deserve better than a wanted Jedi."

"Didn't you just tell me that you would always be mine?" He waited for her reply. When nothing came, he took a hold of her jaw, firmly but with purpose. "Ahsoka, didn't we just have this fight? Remind me; didn't you say you'd always be mine?" She nodded. "Then why would I ever leave you?"

"Because I am an idiot," she sniffled. "I'm sorry Rex. I have so much to learn, first with beginning in trusting myself."

He gently brushed his lips against hers and wrapped her in his strong embrace. "I can finally say this without having to lie. We'll have time to learn my Ahs'ika."

* * *

><p>Later that night…<p>

Her body tingled as every nerve ending stood on edge. His feathery kisses trailed down her spine; his hands, oh his large calloused hands that were used to holding guns and weapons of destruction, caressed her tense shoulders and then moved down her chest. She let out a gasp as they found her beasts and he delicately squeezed her sensitive nipples. His lips traveled back up to her neck and she let out a squeak of surprise as he lightly nipped the soft flesh between her neck and shoulder. The squeak turned into a long moan when he took her ear into his mouth.

"_Don't stop," she moaned. _

She pressed her back into his strong chest, falling into his lap. She shifted in his lap and a very deep, guttural groan vibrated into her ear. His hands traveled further down…down…_ "Echo…"_ she whispered as his hands made contact with their destination.

"_Look at me Thea," _he commanded. It was not an easy feat to open her eyes, but she managed it. She cracked her dark, cocoa eyes open to revile not Echo…_ "Cody…" _her voice hitched in her throat. What was Cody doing here touching her? What was she doing allowing Cody to touch her?

She didn't allow herself to answer as his ministrations continued, building the heat within her. She rocked against his fingers, a chant of his name beginning to spill from her mouth.

"_That's it honey…let yourself go,_" his husky voice purred against her. Thea clutched his burly arms, feeling the strong muscles work their magic on her. She ground herself harder against him, his want pressed hard against her, but he completely focused her. It was bubbling inside of her and she was ready to burst like a volcano ready to blow its top.

Thea turned her face up to kiss his lips and the smoky taste of his mouth pressed down upon hers as another moan escaped her. _"Cody," _she breathed into him_. _So close…so very close….

Thea jerked herself awake, almost falling out of her bed. Scrambling to sit up she could clearly hear her heart thumping against her rib cage. "What the hell was that?" She ran a hand over her face and tangled it into her already disheveled hair.

"What the hell, what the hell…?" She jumped out of bed and ran into the refresher and splashed some cool water over her pale face. The dream felt so real, she could still feel his hands touching her; his kisses pressing against her skin. Thea placed her fingers against her neck and then her lips. No man had made her feel so…incredible, so turned on before. And as suddenly as the sensation came on, it left and a sickly feeling replaced it. Lurching toward the toilet, Thea emptied all the contents of her stomach. After everything was empty and dry heaved a few times, she flushed and rinsed out her mouth.

It had been a long time since she had dreams of men touching her and never pleasant ones like that. But why a man she had only met two days ago could bring her such pleasure and not her love? What did it all mean? _Maybe I'm breathing way too much into this. It means nothing. Then why am I still thinking about it? What about Echo? Why wasn't it Echo in the dream? _

After splashing her face a couple more times with the water, Thea returned to her bed, but was far from sleepy. Instead she turned on her back and stared at the ceiling cursing the person above her.

* * *

><p>Having the a similar dilemma, Cody was also using his refresher, but his problem was much more difficult to rid of than splashing water on his face. <em>What the hell am I thinking? <em>Resigning his fate to a cold shower, he stepped in and let himself finish. His legs almost buckled out from him a few times. _Talk about your all time sexual frustration,_ Cody moaned. Thinking about a certain red head from his dream, another load groan emitted from his lips and let the water wash over his deprived body. Cody then cleaned and dried himself off. Slipping back into his sweats he climbed back into bed, but sleep was far from coming. He rolled onto his side and stared at the wooden floor also silently cursing the person below him.

* * *

><p><em>A little juciy tid bit to hold you over until next time lol! Sorry, not the best fluff writer, but it's all for fun right? <em>

_The next chapter is going to be actually a small interlude just to give everyone a little break..._


	20. Interlude

Any fool can be a Father, but it takes a real man to be a Daddy!  
>~ Philip Whitmore Snr.<p>

* * *

><p>There was no amount of training that could have prepared him for this. There were no manuals, rules or regulations and no amount of pep talks could calm his rattled nerves, but when she entered the world something within him snapped into action. The first time Fives held baby Ekho he knew he was meant to be a father and when her little hazel eyes blinked sleepily at him, he knew she would have him completely spell bound for the rest of his life.<p>

Hearing her soft cooes one afternoon Fives entered the nursery and saw little Ekho wide awake from her supposed nap. "What are you doing up Cyar'ika?" He gurgled at the baby girl. Fives in his other life would have never been caught dead sweet talking to anyone or anything, but that was his past life. He was still the deadly ARC trooper/Mandalorian when the need called for it, but he enjoyed being the devoted, kind and loving father and husband. The guys gave him a hard time when he cooed and awed over baby Ekho; most of the time he just shrugged his shoulders and grinned. _They have no idea what they are missing._

Ekho gave her father a dimpled smile and made a sputtering sound with her lips sending spit down her chin; indicating that she was not going back to sleep anytime soon. Fives reached down to pick her up and gently swiped the drool away with his finger.

"Hi Princess," he looked lovingly down at his daughter who was contently nestled in the crook of his arm now. "Are you hungry? Is that why you can't sleep?" Ekho didn't look hungry to Fives and she wasn't crying. She babbled in her incomprehensible baby language and made a reach for his face. Fives let her soft little hand touch his face, feeling her silky skin lightly slap his jaw. "Yes, you'll probably have to do that to quite a few men which by the way is fine by me," Fives laughed. He already dreaded the day when she got old enough to start thinking about boys and dating. _Arg, I don't even want to think about it,_ he groaned.

Lightly rocking her in his arms, Fives walked around the room and spotted her favorite toy, a raggedy looking doll shaped as a strill. It was a gift from Walon Vau who had given it to Bella right before having Ekho.

"It really was from Mird," the old, gruff Mando said in a rush, "he didn't want you to forget him."

Bella laughed. "We could never forget Mird, or you for that matter," and she gave a gentle kiss on the old man's cheek causing the Mando to blush. Fives had never seen Vau blush, come to think of it, no one had. Bella definitely had a way with people.

Picking up the stuffed toy, Fives bounced the animal in front of Ekho and the little girl squealed with baby filled laughter. He loved the sound of her laugh; it brought him nothing but joy.

"Littlead'ika, you are the light of my life, right next to your mother. You will be great at whatever you do and I will always be there to protect and support you. You will have nothing to fear. I will always make sure beauty and love surrounds you."

Fives continued to slowly walk around the room while gently swaying his daughter in his arms and began to hum a tune he had heard some time ago. Pausing, he tried to recall where he had heard the song from. It couldn't have been from his childhood-he didn't have a childhood. Did one of the older clones chant it to him? No, impossible it was way to "sissy" for them.

Ah…he remembered. He was on a mission and walking through a small village with Echo. It was after the battle and the villagers were trying to get their homes back in order; their lives back from disarray. There had been a child that was very upset, crying heavily and her father was trying valiantly to calm her down. As Fives and Echo walked by Fives had heard the father murmuring a tune to the distressed child. Normally Fives would ignore such a thing, but something about this particular tune, about how this father was comforting his daughter, made Fives stop and watch. The song was simple but soft and soothing and even brought warmth to Fives own battle weary heart.

"Fives?" His brother called to him. Fives quickly recovered and jogged to catch up with Echo. He would never forget that image or the song.

Soon Fives started singing it. Knowing he didn't have the best voice he kept it soft, but Ekho didn't seem to mind that her daddy couldn't sing. Her little body started to relax into his arms and hazel eyes began to droop.

"This little light of mine," Fives hummed and smiled down at his daughter. "I'm gonna let it shine." Fatherly pride and adoration filled him. "This little light of mine," he continued to sing, "I'm gonna let it shine." Baby Ekho had completely fallen asleep to her father's gentle and soothing voice and Fives placed a light kiss on her delicate forehead. "Ni kar'tayl gar darasuum baby," he whispered.

* * *

><p>His eyes slowly opened and light blinded him momentarily. Taking a minute, Fives waited for his eyes to adjust to the light and he finally opened them fully to see that he was in his room with Bella next to him. She was still asleep, her back propped up against some pillows which had become her regular way of sleeping in her late stage of pregnancy. One hand was draped over her large round stomach and the other sprawled out behind Fives head.<p>

Fives just gazed at his pregnant wife, taking in her glorious presence. It was all a dream he realized. _Not for long, _he smiled. Picking up his hand and tenderly placing it on top of her stomach he felt a little kick from underneath.

"This little light of mine, I'm gonna let it shine. Oh let it shine, let it shine," Fives murmured, "let it shine. I can't wait to meet you Little Ekho."

* * *

><p>Ni kar'tayl gar darasuum-Mando for I love you<p>

Yes, I know very sickly sweet, but it came into my head and I wanted to write it. Anywho, back on track in the next few days!


	21. Chapter 21

Feeling a bit more like herself now that she had her own clothes on, Thea made her way out of her room and lured by the smell of caf, found herself in the kitchen. The young Togruta girl she had met two days ago sat quietly on one of the barstools, looking deep in thought.

"Mind if I join you?" Thea asked. Shaking her head, Ahsoka cracked a soft smile and gestured for Thea to sit. Taking a sip of her drink, Thea leaned into her seat and relished as the liquid warmed her insides. The warmth instantly reminded her of last night's very intimate, steamy…Thea's pale face flushed red.

"Are you okay?" Ahsoka cast concern eyes upon Thea. "You look like you have a fever or something," which only made Thea blush even harder. Luckily the sound of footsteps behind them prevented Thea from having to come up with an explanation. Or did it…Thea mentally groaned as the one person she was not ready to see this morning walked around and poured himself a cup of caf. She watched him like a hawk: how his fingers wrapped around the caf mug, his light tan, luscious lips slipping over the glass; his eyes slightly closing as that first sip of warm goodness slipped down his virile throat.

She tried to control herself, but the images of his muscular chest holding her again him, his large strong arms brushing across her chest, this fingers inching ever so closer... "Oh," Ahsoka let out a little gasp and a light pink tinged her own cheeks. Thea's eyes widened at the girl. She must have been projecting her thoughts and feelings loud enough for the Jedi to hear. _Oh sith oh sith…_

Cody watched the two women as if they had lost their minds. Maybe they had. One was a Jedi after all. What could have caused them to turn that shade of red? Cody looked down at his caf filled mug to Thea and then back down and then back up. _Her face is lovely in that shade. Just like in the dream…_Cody sputtered into his cup, almost choking on the liquid. This time it was Thea and Ahsoka who looked at Cody as if he had just lost his marbles.

"Sorry Thea, you're just projecting so loud that even if I weren't sitting next to you I think I could feel what you were reflecting on," Ahsoka whispered into Thea's ear. Ahsoka had turned a brighter shade of orange and Thea wanted to bury her head into the dirt outside.

_Oh dear lord that means…_ And of course _he_ had to walk into the kitchen making an already awkward situation even more humiliating. Jusik took two steps into the kitchen and recoiled backwards as if someone had struck him in the stomach. The intensity of emotions that surrounded the four of them were overwhelming for both Jedi and as his gaze turned to Thea who just was about to burst into flames from embarrassment and then to Cody who would not make eye contact with anyone. Jusik's toes curled within his boots, his teeth pressed together where they almost hurt his jaw and his eyes narrowed as he scrutinized the two. _I have no reason to feel this way, but I do. There is no passion…there is peace…there is no emotion…ah frack that. _

To make things even worse, Kal Skirata and Fives entered the room, immediately stopping when they noticed two very red faced women, one blushing clone and one Jedi/Mando glaring between the clone and red-headed women. "What the hell is going on here?" Skirata demanded.

Cody shrugged, Thea only blushed harder, Ahsoka tried to school her features to neutral and Jusik looked ashamed. She didn't belong to him; he had no reason to be jealous, besides he may be over thinking things. By the way Cody and Thea were acting he had a good suspicion that he wasn't.

"Well, someone better explain. There's enough tension without this drama to add to it. Come on, out with it!" Skirata was actually quite amused with the whole scene, but he was also tired of everyone playing games with each other. If they could just say what they wanted to, then everyone could stop walking on egg shells. Fives couldn't help but grin. Clones weren't ones to be seen blushing and he couldn't ever recall the commander with a rosy tint to his cheeks.

"It's not funny Fives," Cody pouted. Oh but it was and if he were on the other end, Cody probably be the laughing fool.

"I think I need some air," Thea slipped out of her chair and walked/jogged out of the kitchen.

"I'll come with you," Ahsoka quickly followed so that she wouldn't be left to explain this odd scene which left Cody and Jusik to enlighten Skirata and Fives.

"Bard'ika?" Skirata's voice sounded less tolerant this time.

"Come on Cody," Fives gestured to the ex-commander. Cody let his eyes nervously wander from Jusik to the unhappy clan leader. Very thankful, he obediently followed Fives without an argument.

"Kids these days," Jusik shook his head. He reached for a cup and a large hand blocked his path. Jusik chewed on his lower lip and like a youngling about to be reprimanded, he slowly rolled his blue eyes up at Skirata. "It was nothing Kal," he said. Probably the wrong thing to say since the older Mando knew him well and had never seen Jusik so worked up before.

"Do you want to tell me what it is then?" Skirata removed his hand, but his own ice blue eyes wouldn't settle for just a short answer.

Jusik's shoulders slumped and he dropped his elbows to the counter, pushing his face into his palms. "I'm sorry Buir I've been acting like a real di'kut. I don't know what has come over me; she told me she just wants to be friends and I do respect that. But I don't understand why she has any feelings toward that…that…towards him!"

Skirata placed a strong hand on Jusik shoulder and the young man looked up at him with haunted eyes. "This goes for anyone, I don't care if you are Jedi, Sith, clone or the Emperor himself. Whatever you can't have only makes you want it more. And for you son, are going to have to find a way to live without more."

"That's not very helpful," Jusik muttered. At times, he wished he could rely on his Jedi training to be emotionless, depend on that Force to keep attachment out of his life. Then again, what would life really be like without a little drama? _A little?_ "We're only friends."

"Then why don't you pull your head out of your shebs and be her friend. Stop this petty jealously." Skirata stopped and started again. "You're going to have to learn that friends have to be enough. As a Jedi you might understand that because you were taught to. As a young man in an ever changing and evolving world can you accept her friendship and nothing more?"

"I can learn to," Jusik replied. He put his chin to his chest in humbled shame. _I should be beyond this. I am not a god, just a man._

"You're a good lad Bar'ika. It's okay to trip and fall sometimes. We all have to learn to pick ourselves up and keep walking."

"But what if someone pushes you down; don't you want to push back?" It went against all his training Jusik had ever gone through to even ask the question. The more time he spent away from the Force, the less he felt like a Jedi.

"Not if I want to be the bigger man. There are bigger and better fights out there. You just need to know which ones to pick. This one ad'ike, you need to be the bigger man." There was no room for argument or question and with a resigned sigh Jusik nodded.

* * *

><p>The air was fresh and felt clean as Thea breathed it in through her lungs. She could feel her face start to cool off as the cool breeze wisped over her skin and she looked over her shoulder as soft footsteps came from behind.<p>

"I am so sorry Ahsoka, I didn't mean to put you in such discomfort or in that awkward position," Thea apologized. Turing to completely face the young girl, Thea was reminded why she liked her. Her big blue eyes cried out childlike innocence yet behind them held a whirlwind of fierceness. The girl was still looking for her place in this topsy-turvy world, but was willing to wait for her captain so she could be with him.

"It was a bit overwhelming and I have to say I am a bit surprised," Ahsoka walked up and stood next to Thea. "Cody?" Ahsoka cocked her head slightly and looked skeptically at Thea. "Why?"

In the far distance, Thea and Ahsoka could see Fives and Cody walking together and she had a good idea of what they were talking about. Her heart beat a little quicker and wondered how she would ever show her face around Cody again. "It wasn't intentional. The dream and feelings I mean."

"You could have fooled me." Thea shot the girl a disgruntled look. First it was Cody thinking there was something between her and Bardan and now it was Ahsoka thinking it was her and Cody. Did everything have to revolve around some sort of relationship?

"Listen, it was just a dream," Thea groused.

"As Jedi, we tend to take dreams a little more serious."

"Well don't, not this time Jedi." Working herself up wasn't going to get Thea anywhere, time to change the subject. Effectively cutting off that conversation she asked, "Did your captain decide on the shot?"

"_Rex,_" Ahsoka emphasized, "took the shot last night. He's a bit under the weather right now and in bed. I'm going back up to the room in a little bit."

"That's good news isn't it? You will be able to have that life with him now, that family and work through those hurdles now that he will have a long life?" Thea scuffed her shoe against the wooden porch and focused on a blemish that made one of the boards' imperfect. The chill that she had been working to rid of returned as thoughts of Echo and the life that they could have had made her clench her hands. _He could have been here and had a full life with me. Damn him for dying, damn the galaxy for killing him. _

"It is good," Ahsoka agreed but Thea could hear the hesitation in her voice. Oh how she just wanted to get in her ship and fly away, but she couldn't. Her stupid conscience would never let her down if she did.

"But…?" Thea prodded.

"I just have to grow up Thea and I am not doing a very good job at it," Ahsoka sighed.

"Nobody said growing up was easy kid," Thea smirked. Ahsoka rolled her eyes, but returned the smile. "At least you have a good man to do it with."

Ahsoka looked thoughtful for a moment before nodding. "Yeah, I do, don't I?"

* * *

><p>The two clones had been walking in respectful silence, though Cody knew Fives was dying to ask what had happened in the kitchen. Walking along, Cody pulled some of the long grass into his hands and lightly fluttered it under his chin.<p>

"You like her don't you?" Fives watched as Cody toyed with the grass, looping it around his fingers and then tying it in several knots.

"We're friends now," Cody kept his head bent, but looked out at the corner of his eye toward Fives.

"That wasn't what I asked Cody," Fives reproached.

"I don't know Fives, I don't have a clear thought up here," he indicated by tapping the side of his head. "I've really only known her for a full day so how can I say I like her?" When Cody had met Barriss he had known immediately and there was no second guessing. He knew she was going to be his, no Force or military would stand in his way. Thea, well Cody didn't know what to feel around her. It wasn't a lie that he told Fives that he was a bag full of unclear emotions when it came to the fiery red-head, so what did that mean? What could that mean? Was it a betrayal to Barriss if he developed feelings toward Thea? _Yes…No…Maybe…?_ Did he want to allow himself to have feelings again? _Yes…No…Maybe…?_ Wasn't this what he was running from? Wasn't this what she was running from? Isn't this what they just told themselves yesterday, that they couldn't love another? But who was talking about love? _I am…_

"Echo loved Thea, Cody. I promised my blood brother that I would make sure that she would always know that and I know I have failed him." In an effort to thwart his frustration, Fives also began to pick at the long grass and twirl it in his fingers, but it could not be hidden in the ache laced in his voice. "Echo should be here with her. He was a good and honorable man."

"How so?" Cody asked, dragging his shoe in the dirt, moving the little rocks around and creating a zig-zag pattern with them. When he looked up, Fives had a bemused look at him. Cody clarified on his question. "How did you fail him?"

"Thea is miserable," Fives said if it was the most obvious thing in the world.

"Not because you have failed on your promise. Do you think if you had died instead of Echo it would have been better? How do you think he would have felt?" Cody had similar thoughts, he wouldn't deny it. When Barriss had died he had wanted death as well as Rex could attest to, but the days were getting better. _Guess we're all still learning. _"What about your wife Fives?"

"What about her?" Fives replied. His shields instantly went in place and he wanted to become suspicious of what Cody had in mind, but he also had to admit he was curious.

"You would have never met her if it wasn't for Echo. He set off the chain of events for you, for just about everyone in our crazy little group. Don't you think he would want you to do right by him by finding what he had even if it wasn't forever? Fives, kid," Cody cuffed his hand between where Fives neck and shoulder joined and met him honeyed eye to honeyed eye. "I'll tell you something that I know very well. For Echo, what he and Thea shared wasn't a blink of an eye, it was a life time. Thea always knew and always will know Echo's love. You didn't fail her or Echo. You got that son?" Cody almost sounded like his old self to Fives ears and he remembered why he respected to ex-commander so. Cody waited for Fives acknowledgement and slowly Fives nodded. Giving a light squeeze on Fives shoulder Cody murmured, "Good."

"Cody," Fives started as they began walking again, "Thea is like a sister to me. I won't see her hurt."

"You're implying that I am going to pursue her or that we're going to do something," Cody said neutrally. His insides tightened as they found themselves back on the topic of him and Thea.

"I just want you to know and I don't care if you were my superior at one time. I'll kick your shebs from here back to Coruscant if I see tears caused by you." Silence between the two men filled the air.

After a few minutes Cody spoke. "You're a good kid Fives. You and Echo were both good men. You both made the 501st proud. You made Rex and me proud. Somewhere between then and now you have become a wiser; honorable man than I."

Fives wasn't a kid; he wasn't a rookie shiny anymore. He had grown into an intelligent, respected free willed man and Cody found that pride started to fill him when he thought that it had been long ago forgotten since the days of the GAR. He was proud to know this man, proud that he had been a part of Fives and Echo's promotion to the 501st and then ARC troopers. _If I were half the man Fives is then I could face the demons that haunt me so. _Wrapping an arm around Fives shoulders, Cody gave him a crooked smile. Fives eyes widened as he looked into the ex-commander's own and saw a new light begin to shine.

"I would never hurt her." Cody vowed.

"That's good to know. Cause I think my fatherly instincts are kicking in and I seem to be extra protective which makes me extra aggressive." Cody bellowed out a heartfelt laugh. He snaked his hand up the side of Fives head and into his well groomed hair and tousled it up.

"I wouldn't expect anything less ARC. I never did say this, but thanks for coming to my aid in the kitchen."

Fives scrambled to get out of Cody's grip and after succeeding and his hair now sticking out in all directions, Fives looked at Cody in a new light. The road ahead would be long; windy with bumps, trials, wins and losses, but this was a start. "That's what brothers do."

* * *

><p>Rex had never felt this bad in his whole life. Check that, when he had contracted the Blue Shadow Virus he thought he was going to die; this shot came pretty close to what that virus did to his body. One minute his body felt like it was on fire and then another minute he felt like he was taking a polar dive into the freezing waters on Hoth. His stomach was constantly filled with endless and painful cramps; causing him to hunch in a fetal position on the bed and try and take deep breaths during the worst of them. His toes and fingers curled, his legs spasmed with Charlie horses and Rex did all he could not to cry out in misery. Was this shot really worth all this pain? <em>Yes, it's just for a short time you baby. Suck it up. <em>Rex heard the door to his room open and he wanted to curse the intruder away, but knew if he opened his mouth a moan of agony would replace any foul expletive he had instead.

As the footsteps grew closer his body decided to start shaking again and he couldn't control them. The bed shifted downward and he could feel a light hand on his shoulder. Too weak and tired to raise his head, Rex resigned himself to let this intruder see him in the feeblest state he had ever been in.

"You're not weak Rex," she said gently to him. "You're the strongest person I know." His body suddenly stopped shaking and his muscles seemed to relax under her touch.

"Ahsoka," Rex shakily said.

"I'm here Rexster," he could feel her start to stroke his arm and he relaxed even more into the mattress. Whatever she was doing to him was working and didn't want her to stop. A knock at the door interrupted her ministrations and Rex let out an angered growl.

"Tell who ever it is to jump off a cliff," the normally patient and mannerly clone was far from being courteous or respectful to anyone with good reason. Rex didn't want anyone seeing him in this state, he only wanted to been seen as the strong, courageous and fearless man they knew of. Feeling a light grip on his arm and then the emptiness of the bed as Ahsoka went to answer the door, Rex strained to hear who she was talking to. Even with his enhanced hearing, they just sounded like garbled voices to his aching head.

Ahsoka was surprised to say the least to see Cody standing at the door and actually talking to her. "Rex is really sick Cody. Maybe come back tomorrow when he's feeling better."

"Well," Cody rubbed the back of his neck, "Rex isn't the one I wanted to talk to right now. I need to ask you a couple of questions." Ahsoka blinked a couple of times. Did she hear him right? He wanted to actually have a conversation with her? "You do remember I am a Jedi don't you?"

Cody looked insulted and Ahsoka felt a little bit bad. He was trying to make an effort for amends, or at least she thought he was and she was making it harder on him. _But why should I make it easier on him? He didn't do anything to help prevent the death of Barriss and contributed to Master Kenobi's._ "Give me a second," the door shut in Cody's face and he wanted to bag his fists against it telling the Togruta to open it back up. Remembering his friend was ill inside prevented him from doing so.

A minute later the door opened and Ahsoka slipped out, closing it gently behind her. Folding her arms over her chest she looked at Cody expectantly. Both had reservations and hard feelings about each other, but as Rex had said to her, "We all have done wrong in our pasts and we aren't exempt from them." Ahsoka was still a Jedi and she could forgive. She was also a young woman; she could forgive as well.

"What do you want to talk about?" Ahsoka asked.

"Barriss," Cody answered softly. That was not what Ahsoka had expected, but she would not deny she was intrigued and suspicious.

"What about her?"

"You got to see her before Order 66. Can you just tell me what she sounded like, what you guys talked about; how she looked?" Cody rested himself against the banister and looked…hopefully? Was that actual hope coming from his pale face? Ahsoka wanted to be mad at him, angered that he had loved her, that his love for her did nothing to prevent her death; but looking at the sorrowful man before her, broken yet optimistic that she could share some memories with him, Ahsoka could not bring forth the resentment she wanted to have for him.

"Cody," she started hesitantly. Cody leaned in just a bit in anticipation, "I didn't get a chance to see Barriss before she was sent out on her mission." Cody was immediately crestfallen and then schooled his face to neutral, but Ahsoka wasn't fooled. She could feel the disappointment and hurt within him. She quickly continued, "The times we did cross paths were brief. Towards the end she seemed more reserved than usual, but a few times I could feel something like, something similar to what I felt towards Rex leak through her. I was so stupid not to suspect she was in love, but we were all very distracted."

"Yeah, war does that," Cody mumbled and Ahsoka scowled at him. Cody instantly shut his mouth.

"I do remember something that peeked my interest and meant to ask her the next time we saw each other. It was right after Umbara, the last mission we would ever have together." Ahsoka scratched her arm in discomfort knowing that there would be no next time and her friend would be forever gone.

"What was it?" Cody prodded. Cody remember Umbara very well, everyone who was there remembered that mission. It had been a turning point for many clones to see that a Jedi General turn so malicious toward his command. It was also the last time he would ever see Barriss as well.

"I saw her turn toward you and you stopped and turned toward her. Blast, I'm such a…what do they call it here?" Ahsoka stomped her foot in frustration.

"Di'kut?" Cody supplied.

"Yes, thank you, a di'kut! How could I have not known?" She then turned accusing eyes on Cody.

"We hid it very well," Cody wasn't going to be intimidated by a Jedi and met her stare with his own.

"You really did love her didn't you?" It wasn't an accusation, but a realization.

"I would have died for her Ahsoka, if I had been there I would have saved her," Cody wanted the girl to know, to understand how much his agony, his torment and his love for Barriss really went. He punished himself every day knowing that he was alive and she wasn't because he wasn't there to save her. Worst of it all he had acted like those who had slayed his love and killed his general; his friend.

Cody felt his wounded hand gently being lifted and he was about to violently retract it, but a warm, tingly sensation coursed through his sore bones and muscles. Looking wildly down at his hand and the two soft hands that incased his, he watched the young Jedi was healing his injury.

"W..why?" He stuttered. He was letting this Jedi touch him, heal him! Everything that he had fought against screamed for him to run. _Shut up._ And for once the voices stopped.

"Don't you think it's time to heal Cody?" Ahsoka asked as she kept one hand under his as he flexed his newly healed fingers.

Tentatively, Cody nodded his dark head. "I'm trying Commander."

"Not commander, just Ashoka."

* * *

><p><em>Hi All!<em>

_Sorry for taking so long, had a bit of a brain bubble and it blocked some thoughts-but here it is! Hope you liked it. _

_I want to give a big thanks to **Laloga** for helping me out with some of the grammer and giving me some very helpful tips =) Still learning and appreciate everyone who wants to teach! It will only improve the writing skills _

_Thank you to all who have read and reviewed and I hope you continue to enjoy the story. _

_Speaking of the story-it's going to move a bit-I'm going to jump a few days and get it rolling. Don't want you getting bored. The next updates will come quickly! _

_Thanks again!_


	22. Chapter 22

_Hi All,_

_The rating goes up to a T+. There is a violent matter in this one so reader discretion __is advised. _

_Thank you again for all your awesomeness and please continue to enjoy. Always, reviews are welcomed! _

* * *

><p>There's somethin'<br>I wanna say tonight  
>Let Go<p>

The next few days provided to be a rollercoaster for everyone at Kyrimorut. With a few false alarms from both very pregnant women, Fives and Ordo was a bundle of exhausted nerves. Besany and Bella tried to persuade their husbands to get some rest, but they wouldn't hear of it.

"Boys, there are plenty of people here to help and it's not like you won't be able to hear if they call for you," With Skirata's firm but attentive tone both tired men just mumbled an okay and fell into their respectful beds and were out before their heads touched their pillows.

"You ever had any thought to children?" Cody asked Thea while they sat out on the porch swing.

"Never," Thea responded. Why would she want to bring children into a loveless world?

"Are you leaving soon?" Cody dreaded the answer.

"Do you want me to go Cody?" Thea asked. It had been on her mind. She had to leave someday.

Instead of answering, he continued with his reign of questions. "Will you be lonely when you do leave?" Cody looked at Thea's hands which were neatly folded in her lap and a forlorn feeling filled him. He wished he was brave enough to snake his hands between hers and hold them, but he wasn't.

"Will you miss me?" She countered. Why did it matter if he missed her? She couldn't love him, so why ask the impossible?

"No, of course not," Cody said neutrally. _Ouch,_ Cody's chest hurt as the words popped out of his mouth and he wanted to clutch at the sharp pain. The words sounded unconvincing to both of their ears, but it still stung none the less. The swing rocked as Thea scooted off of it and stood in front of Cody. He watched her as she focused on the ground. She looked about to say something, but walked away in silence into the house. Cody knew he should have followed, apologized and told her what he really felt, instead continued to sit on the old rocker and wallow in self-misery.

* * *

><p>Cody entered the kitchen with what Ahsoka would describe as a very blank look; Cody was anything but blank. If she wasn't a Jedi, Ahsoka would have never guessed that the stoic and hard ex-commander was reeling with unsettled nerves. What could have Cody on such an edge?<p>

Ahsoka watched with curiosity as Cody cautiously slid himself into the barstool, body ridged and fingers began to softly drum on the marble countertop. She slowly sipped on a local juice drink that some of the Skirata boys had insisted on her trying. She had scurried up the courage and pour herself small cup of the concoction and just as Cody walked in, she had taken a sip.

It wasn't the lack of flavor, far from it. Mixed with perhaps the berries she and Thea had stumbled upon their first night, plenty of sugar it was pungent and very strong. Of course there was alcohol, what drink by any Mando wouldn't have in it? Ahsoka was sure if she finished her small cup she would be flat on her bum on the cool kitchen floor. Licking her lips and trying not to put on a sour face, she gently put down the cup pushing it away from her. Glancing back up at Cody, she noticed him staring at the table.

"Cody, can I help you? Ahsoka asked gently.

His head shot straight up as if he forgot she was even present in the room with him. "I uh," he started awkwardly.

_Something's definitely up,_ Ahsoka thought as she looked at the man skeptically. Cody and Rex had a long and difficult talk days ago, but after Cody had confided to Rex and even apologized for his appalling behavior, Ahsoka began to look at the commander in a new light. While she didn't completely trust him, she empathized for him and just like any man and woman here; hoped for a life outside of his old ways.

She waited patiently as she felt his anxiety spike. "I think you would have been a good Jedi Knight," he rushed out. Ahsoka actually balked at the confession. Again, she found herself not expecting this from Cody and was left speechless. "I'm glad it was you who found my brother."

"Cody," Ahsoka breathlessly tried to answer back, "I…I…thank you."

His tawny skin had begun to regain some of the healthy tan back to his face, but it could not disguise the deep fire-brick red that flushed his cheeks. "I just needed to let you know that and say I'm sorry for being such a di'kut."

"I won't say it didn't hurt Cody, or understand all of it, but your apology does mean a lot to me."

"Yes, well," Cody picked uneasily at the marbled counter top, "I'm trying." Ahsoka reached her hand over and gently covered Cody's tense one. "You don't happen to know where Thea is do you?" He quickly changed the subject.

_Ah.._. "I thought I saw her head toward her ship."

"Ship?" He asked worriedly. "She's not leaving is she?" She was really leaving without saying goodbye to him? Without letting him apologize and giving him a small chance at letting him tell her how he felt? _You've had plenty of chances you coward._

"She didn't say anything to me or Rex." Ahsoka saw his shoulders instantly relax. He scooted out of his chair and stood up. "Cody," she waited for him to look at her, "Be careful. For the both of you okay?"

Cody nodded silently and began to head out, but paused in the door way. Turning slightly around, his eyes wandered before meeting hers. His voice was deep and thoughtful as he spoke, "You're concerned for me?"

Ahsoka cocked her head. "Friends look out for each other. You are healing and Thea is strong, but even the strongest of walls can crumble."

Cody blinked a few times and Ahsoka swore she could see the corner of his lip pick up. "Thank you," with that he left the kitchen.

* * *

><p>As Cody made his way across the field he looked out seeing her distinct ship and a small figure on the top of it. Approaching closer, he could make out Thea's slim figure. <em>What is she doing up there?<em> He slowed his approach and glanced up.

"Thea?" He called out to her. She looked over her shoulder and then leaned over the side of the ship, suddenly concern for her slipping and falling over the ship made his heart rate climb.

"Cody?" She asked, mildly baffled. "Come up here." She didn't have to tell him twice. He looked for a way up, sighting the small side ladder that was attached to the hull and made his way up. Hearing him come up from behind, she twisted her head and gave him a slight nod. "Hi," she said faintly.

Cody settled himself beside her and was taken by the view. "Hi," he returned, his voice rumbled deeply through his chest. Neither one looked at each other as they sat watching as the orange dwarf sun set behind the blackening foothills. The occasional yip and howl of the native shrill could be heard from the far fields and forests. Cody shifted his legs so that they were straight in front of him. Thea forced herself not to stare at her companion and keep her eyes on the shadowing fields ahead. "I never just sat down and watched a sunset before," he murmured.

"None of the planets you visited you saw a sunset? That's kind of sad," she sighed. A somber tone had descended over her as she reflected on what all the troopers, all of what Echo had missed.

"It wasn't a visit Thea, it was war," Cody retorted. She gave out a snort and finally regarded him.

"I was there Cody," she said. They returned to their silence and another yip and mournful howl could be heard from the distance. "Cody," Thea started softly.

"Yes Thea," he scooted closer to her to where he could lightly brush his fingertips to hers and almost close enough to touch her shoulders to his.

"Watch." Cody was confused as to what she was referring to that was until the stunning lights of the garden's exotic flowers illuminated the field. Cody's breath was taken away and there were no words to describe the overwhelming, but delightful feeling growing inside of him. Blues, greens, reds, yellows, oranges and other colors blinked on like little lamps; it was nature at its greatest.

"Exquisite isn't it?" Thea exhaled. She was no longer watching the flowers, but Cody's reaction.

"I've never seen anything like it before," Cody said breathlessly. He really did feel like a little boy, all excited and giddy inside.

She folded up her legs and wrapped her arms around them; then rested the side of her face on her knees so that she was gazing at Cody. As if sensing her stare, he looked out of the corner of his eyes and then fully turned to her.

"What?"

"I find it both charming and heartbreaking that such a simple thing as a sunset is a new experience for you when you could have seen it every day. I'm glad that I get to share this encounter with you." She returned to gaze out at the last bit of orange as it disappeared behind the black mountains and the flower-like lanterns glowed brilliantly.

"Me too," Cody murmured. They sat in retrospective silence for a while until a cool breeze made Thea shiver. Without hesitation, Cody took off his jacket and placed it over her shoulders. She slightly smiled at him and wrapped it tightly over her. "Thea," Cody began tentatively.

"Hum…?"

"Could you ever see yourself with another?" It should have taken her by surprise, but they had asked each other only days before a very similar question. She could feel it deep within her that Cody wanted to ask her the question again. It was only a matter of time and she still didn't have an answer for him.

Schooling her features to be calm and raising a golden-red brow at the man next to her she rebutted, "Could you Cody?"

Because of the glow flowers, Thea could not only hear, but also see Cody heave a great sigh. "Would you want to love another Thea?"

"Would you?" she shot back, trying to dodge his questions.

"Will I ever get a straight answer from you?" He asked irritated. His eyes flashed intensely with annoyance and willed himself to keep from shaking the ever maddening woman next to him. Instead to control his frustration, he sat on his shaking hands.

Thea didn't want to fight with Cody; they had come too far and had an understanding. At times though, she found herself on edge with him due to the knowledge of his power and ferocity from their first night's encounter. Telling herself it was silly, he would never do it again did nothing to pacify the little warning voice in the back of her mind.

"I don't know how to let go of him. I don't know if I want to let go of him," she finally answered. Feeling the anger subside, Cody slid his hands from under his bum and scooted even closer to Thea. She could feel his strong arm and shoulder brush against her side and was surprised to find his hand gently stroking her long tresses. She shivered again, but it had nothing to do with the cold.

"I'll always love Barriss," his voice had deepened into a rich, thick baritone, something she had never heard any clone talk like. "You can't ever rid of your first true love."

"Then why would you want a second?" Thea asked. She felt his hand stop and she suddenly missed the contact.

"Thea, are you scared?" Again, she was thrown off by him. His questions continued to strike a chord through her.

"Scared?" she sat up, releasing her legs and asked indignantly.

Cody ground his teeth and twisted his lips before continuing. "Yes scared. I know I am."

"That's big of you to admit," Thea coughed and stood up. Straightening her jumpsuit, Thea prepared to leave.

"Where are you going?" Cody scrambled up ungracefully, almost tripping and falling off the side. He caught himself and followed her to the ladder. She looked up at him, brown eyes gleaming in the dark.

"It's late Cody and I'm tired. I need to make plans for my next destination. I can't stay here forever." She made her decent and jumped onto the soft ground. Cody quickly climbed down the latter and trotted up to her, grabbing Thea's arm.

"What's got you so afraid? What happened to you Thea?" He forced her to turn around, but she would not look at him. "You can't keep running forever, believe me I know."

"What is it that you want from me Cody? If its love, I can't give it to you," She wanted to sob. She had told Jusik the same thing and felt like the worst person in the galaxy right at the moment. With Jusik, she only wanted to be friends, Cody well…what did she want from him?

"Why?" He asked, trying to control the shrill in his voice.

She was staring at his large paw, fingers securely wrapped right above her wrist. She flexed her wrist and wrapped her own long, slim fingers around his skin. "Because," she was barely audible to Cody's impeccable hearing, "I'm damaged Cody." With that, she let go of him and slipped out of his hold. She turned away and headed toward the house.

"And you think I'm not?" He shouted after her. "Thea, you think I'm not damaged! We all have wounds to heal, it just depends who you want to heal them with!" He hoped that she had listened to him. Cody kicked angrily at the dirt, sending clumps and rock soaring into the mysteries of the night.

Once again, the sharp howl of the native species echoed from the distance, filling the blank void in Cody's head. As he calmed his breathing, a new revolution came to him. _I can't let her just walk away. I can't let it end this way._

With that, Cody took off in a run, hoping to catch Thea before she made it to the house.

* * *

><p>"<em>Depends on who you want to heal with"…<em>Cody's voice echoed through Thea's mind. _Well what if I don't want to heal with anyone?_ It was a lie and she knew it. Thea wanted to smile, wanted to feel that same freedom she felt in the garden and smile again. She wanted to love and be loved. _With Echo…With…_her thought quickly disintegrated as the rapid approach of footsteps made her jump and turn.

Cody tumbled to a stop, breathing deeply through his nose to catch his breath, and huffed, "You can't walk in there yet. Not until you tell me what's wrong. If you walk through that door, then we both failed. You came to hear about Echo and you did, but have you really found the true reason you are here? Let me ask you this, do you really think he would want to see his girl, his love in such misery because of him? I know Barriss would hate me if she knew half the things I have done. If I can redeem myself by one thing, let that one thing be listening to you."

There were so many things she could have said, could have done; in the end Thea chose to tentatively placed her hand on Cody's heaving shoulder and slowly slid it down his shaking arm and then coiled her fingers into his.

"Walk with me," she tugged him forward and he followed. They walked for some time in the pitch dark, Cody waiting for Thea to start talking and when she didn't, he almost asked where they were going that was until the glorious flowers radiated all over him. Cody only imagined ever seen such colors in a discotheque typesetting: manmade and obnoxious. But this, this was god's creation and absolutely breathtaking.

Thea entered the garden with Cody's hand still laced within hers and weaved their way through until they reached a clearing. He felt light, happy, something he hadn't felt in a long time. It was if…

"Barriss?" He called out, confused. How could she be here?

"I felt closer to Echo when I was here too, as if he was standing right next to me." Thea closed her eyes as a soft breeze lifted her crimson locks from her shoulders. She let go of Cody's hand and stepped closer to one of the large stocks. Opening her eyes, she looked at the yellow-buttercup bulb. _How ironic. _It was like the one she had picked the day she came with Ahsoka. She remembered how it quickly turned a sickly brown and shriveled in her hands. How lonely and desolate she had felt after the death of the flower, much like how she felt after the loss of Echo.

"It's almost like I can hear his sweet voice caressing my ear, his warm breath against my cheek, silky lips tenderly touching mine," Thea gently placed two fingers against her lips. She pivoted in the dirt and looked sadly at Cody. "Outside of here, we won't ever feel this way again."

"Perhaps, but we can try. Together we can share each other's pain, angst, hurt; happiness. Don't you ever want that again?" Cody stepped closed and placed both of his hands on her tense shoulders. She looked down, her red hair falling like a curtain over the side of her face. Cody taking one of his hands stroked back the hair and placed it behind her ear.

"After I found out about Echo, I told myself love was only meant for chosen ones. I was not meant to be one of them. Every time he went out to fight, I knew there was a chance for him not to come back, but prayed for a safe return and each time he would, until that Citadel mission. Fives told me Echo had an uneasy feeling about it. Echo called me to tell me goodbye; I should have known then, but I guess I didn't want to believe it. I wasn't or didn't want to admit that death could happen to someone so madly in love." Thea gulped down a sob and forced herself to remain steady. Cody could feel the quiver under his hands.

"He commed me in the middle of the battle to tell me he loved me. After that, I never got to see, hear or touch him again. Fives called me to confirm his death, but it wasn't just Echo who died that day. I died with him. After Echo, I continued to fly for the GAR."

"Why?" Cody was puzzled over the reason why she would stay. Having to look at the many faces of the clones, it must have done her in at some point.

"I promised Echo I would do anything that I could to insure the safety of his brothers. I just sort of became numb to the fact that I was hearing his voice every day and night. I mean, it was him, but it wasn't. Each of you have very distinct ways of changing your accent whether you realize it or not. But it didn't matter, I was dead inside. I guess that's how I really was able to function.

"Before Order 66 and yes I became very familiar with both Order 66 and 37," Cody cringed at the mention of Order 37, "things were getting tense. I imagine they were tense for everyone. I tried to keep to my own business, but everything seemed to bleed together. Are you familiar with the names Appo and Bow?"

This time Thea could feel the chills run down Cody's arms. Appo and Bow were Vader's right hand men. Loyal to the end and ready to turn a gun on one of their brothers if they thought for a moment that they were the enemy, that's what made Appo and Bow Vader's dogs. They, especially Appo, had no issue with gunning down the Jedi or Padawans, be them younglings or babies. Though not many knew it, Appo also had no quarrels extracting information even if it wasn't useful from women by _any_ means necessary.

"I was flying back to Coruscant with a Jedi and his troops when the order came through…

* * *

><p>Before Thea even could ask what was happening she saw the Jedi beside her with a large and bloody hole in the middle of his chest. His green eyes were wide and terrified and mouth agape as if trying to scream a warning that never got out. The Jedi's body slumped lifelessly in his chair until one of the troopers haphazardly grabbed him shoved it to the floor.<p>

"What the hell!" Thea yelled.

"You will land this ship and come with us," the first time Thea ever recalled, the neutral voice of the soldiers she come to appreciate frightened her. What was she supposed to do? Try to take off into hyperspace? They would kill her for sure. What would be the consequences if she did cooperate? She was just a pilot, nothing more nothing less.

The gun pressed against her temples quickly made up her mind and she began the decent toward the GAR airbase. None of the air traffic control was responding and found it difficult to navigate through the unusual thick black fog. As soon as she got under the fog she realized it wasn't fog at all and a heavy gasp slipped from her. A burning inferno replaced what used to be the Jedi Temple and radiated in her eyes.

_What is going on!_ Thea's heart was beating rapidly, sweat made it hard to grip the controls and she forced herself not to look at the trooper standing imposingly over her. As her ship touch the ground and before she had a chance to lock it down, the trooper roughly grabbed her by the arm and threw her in front of him.

"Tell me what is going on!" She demanded as they marched forward. He just shoved her forward, almost causing her to stumble to her knees. She hastily grabbed onto the trooper that marched in front of her; he swiftly turned around and struck her square in the mouth with the butt of the blaster.

"That'll keep you quiet for a bit," the trooper that was manhandling her, snarled and then laughed. Her mouth gushed with blood and she wiped it with the back of her hand, splashing it purposely on the back of the trooper who had assaulted her. "You are going to cause us a lot of trouble, little pilot aren't you?" The trooper grabbed her once again, stopping the whole group and they circled around them. Thea glared into the T-shape visor, willing herself not to be afraid, but this man was no fool. She couldn't hide the fear in her eyes and spat more blood on his visor.

"Traitors, every one of them," the trooper's voice was a raspy whisper.

"Who?" Thea gurgled through the pooling blood in her mouth.

"The Jedi and those who help them."

* * *

><p>Thea was led into the belly of the GAR barracks and actually passed by the sleeping quarters, a fleeting memory popping into her head of when she surprised Echo on his last day of leave. She tried to keep that image of him so that whatever was doled out on her, she would at least have one happy thing to reflect on.<p>

They entered a small, stale grey room and Thea was forced into a hard seat and made to wait. _For what?_ She didn't have to wait long until two large troopers dawned with blue striping entered the room. They seemed larger than the others, though she knew that they were identical. Maybe it was animosity they were projecting toward her?

"You were a pilot for the GAR?" One asked as he circled around the desk and stood on the opposite side of her. The other stayed by the door and neither took off their helmets.

Thea's mouth hurt the blood had stopped leaking, but all she could taste was the bitter metallic associated with it. She was sure an ugly bruise was already forming.

"I _am a _pilot for the GAR. Would you mind telling me what the hell is going on?" she winced as she answered.

"So you know what planets the Jedi are on," he completely ignored her question.

His fingers tapped on the desk and it quite irritated Thea. Dragging her eyes off his hand and trying to ignore the annoying tap she answered bluntly, "No." Why would she know this?

The trooper slammed his hands hard on the desk causing Thea to jump in her seat. Why were these men acting like this? What had happened within the couple hours that they had gone from friends to enemies?

"Don't lie to me woman, you have coordinates to where the Jedi have been. You will tell me now! Where was the last place you took a Jedi?" He demanded.

"I thought…" Thea licked her swollen lip, turning to look at the man behind her and then back at the one in front, "I thought you fought with the Jedi, not against them."

"The Jedi have committed the most heinous crime of all times. They have tried to kill the Chancellor and by order, they must be annihilated."

"This is wrong," Thea's voice rose an octave in her bewilderment. "How can you fight with them for so long and then see them as enemies?"

"You will tell me Red, tell me where the Jedi are," even with the helmet muffling the emotion from his voice, the trooper was seething with vile animosity.

"I do not know," Thea said low and slowly. Suddenly a pair of harsh hands was on her shoulders and grabbed her hard enough to cause her to moan in pain. For a moment Thea was sure that this man was going to break her shoulders, but he eased some as he stood her in front of the one she had been talking to. The pop-hiss sound of his helmet disengaging from his armor sounded and he lifted it, settling it on his hip. His eyes, golden brown like the others, held no laughter, no life; only cold and uncaring. He may have been born of the same gene of her love, but this man would never be Echo.

"I know you had a fleet affair with one of our boys, Thea Barron," at the widening of her eyes only confirmed it what he must have been aware of. "We keep close tabs on all of our workers, particularly the women in the GAR. Secrets like sleeping with a woman never stay secret for long, especially with a bunch of sex deprived men. Perhaps you miss the comradeship of the soldier. Shall we accommodate her Commander Bow?" Appo caressed a gloved finger down her throat.

"No!" Thea shouted and flung backwards only to land squarely into Bow's chest. He once again grabbed her by the arms and pressed her against the wall, effectively pinning them above her head. Thea squirmed and struggled, even kicking backwards and heard her feet plant with the armor, but knew it didn't hurt them any. "You can't do this!" She screamed. Stars floated in her vision as Bow slammed her head against the hard wall and pressed his body against her softer one. His armor pinched her skin even through her flight suit. The pain in her head distracted her momentarily that is until Bow took his leg and forced her to spread hers.

Trying to clear her head, Thea blinked rapidly and tried to turn to see her attacker. She could hear the clanking of armor as it was set on the table. He was taking his time, toying with her; letting her fear build up. It was working.

"What do you think Bow, she's a pretty one isn't she?" The commander taunted. Thea didn't have to see the wolfish grin that was plastered on his face; she could hear it in his voice. It made her stomach churn and sick.

"Scum," Thea ground out. The air left her as Bow shoved her hard against the wall and punched her in the kidneys. Thea's legs almost gave out under her, but Bow's strong legs pushed her up between her thighs. Bow pressed his body tautly up against hers and he effectively squished Thea up against the wall again.

"What was that, pilot?" His despicable voice bit into her ear. Her hands were beginning to fall asleep from being in the wrong position for so long and her back screamed where Bow had just punched her. Thea was sure if she was to pee, blood would replace any liquid that came out of her, but she would not give them the satisfaction of knowing she was in discomfort.

"So you like sleeping with my brothers, is that right Red?" the Commander, who was now only in his black one piece suite sauntered over to her and stroked her face. Thea flinched and tried to move her head. Taking her hands in one of his much larger ones, Bow pressed his other against her head, forcing her still.

"You are not a brother to Echo," Thea sizzled. "Echo was more man than you'll ever be!" Her lip had begun to bleed again and spat it into his face. The commander slowly wiped the entrails off and looked at her, eyes on fire and a slow, bitter smile that terrified Thea beyond all means crept up on his lips.

"Oh, I think you'll find I'm all male, Red. After we're finished with you you'll be begging to give us what we want or death. Probably both." The commander reached behind him and picked up a jackknife from one of his discarded pouches.

"How can you do this! You are soldiers of the GAR! Proud men; men of honor!" Thea yelled.

"Even proud men have to stoop to low levels to get what they want, Red." The commander was now behind her and Bow off to the side, but still had a firm grip on her hands. She could feel him press up against her, his arousal clearly evident. The tearing sound of her flight suit filled her ears and she violently shivered as the rush of cold air coursed over her body.

"No! Stop! Please stop!" She screamed. _Oh god, this can't be happening. _Thea struggled valiantly against her hold, but they were so much stronger than her. She could feel him run his filthy hands over her skin, over her underwear and unclasped her bra. The more she struggled the more it seemed to turn him on. His hands traveled lower to her hips and felt what she could only describe as him biting her. She howled in anger as he took vicious nips and bites over her body, surely leaving bruises for later.

"I'll kill you! I swear I will kill you, you ungodly, soulless bastards!" Thea shrieked and they only laughed. She could feel his blade on her rear as it tore her underwear, totally exposing herself to him. One more valiant effort to pull away from her captor, she pushed, pulled anything for release.

"Please," she begged. "Don't do this."

A repulsive chuckle from both men filled her ears and the feel of his naked body pressed against her backside finally did make her loose her contents in her stomach. They waited until she was done and the commander continued, "Bleed for me Red."

No one paid any mind to the howls and wails of torture coming from within the small room. Through the worst of it, at one time she pictured Echo's smiling face and tried to pretend that they were making love on a beautiful beach, but the pain was so awful; she didn't want to associate Echo with such horror.

Each time she thought one was finished; the next would come and take his place. She tried to tune out their grunts and groans, their groping and clawing hands, but they wanted her to suffer and scream and a screams they got.

She didn't know how long it lasted, but she was sure her body was going to break in half. Thea tried a couple times to wrestle away and it only fueled their manic rage. There wasn't one spot that hadn't been maimed and in the end she hadn't said one word about where any Jedi could possibly be. She honestly didn't know.

"Appo, do you think we went too far?" Bow asked as he and Appo put their armor back on. They both glanced down at the quivering and bloody mess they left Thea in. Purple, black and red welts lined her body below the oozing blood, decorating her like a gory striped Twi'lek.

"Are you getting soft on me Bow?" Appo growled as he picked up his helmet off the table and looked down at Thea again who was curled up naked in a ball. She peered up at them between her quivering arms and in a brave and probably dumb act of bravery, gave them a scathing, vile stare. Bow looked toward his victim and then put his helmet back on, effectively shutting out any remorse or emotion if he had any toward her.

"Think about it long and hard Red. We'll be back in a couple of hours." With that they left Thea naked, shaking; bleeding and with no dignity left.

* * *

><p>Cody needed to throw up. He had heard rumors of the disgusting tactics that Appo and Bow had used. He didn't want to believe that his brothers would stoop to raping women for information or just sickly pleasure.<p>

"How…" Cody cleared his throat and tried again, "How did you receive this?" He pointed to the jagged scar along her face. He wasn't sure if he wanted to know or if Thea could continue to tell the story. He was surprised when her hoarse voice caressed his ears.

"Appo thought to beautify me after my first attempt at escaping. Guess they didn't have time for the other stuff," Thea traced the scar and then let her hand fall to her side. She closed her eyes once again as the ghastly memory replayed. Her fingers dug into Cody's skin, holding onto him like a life preserver. Cody would never complain. He would always be her preserver if she needed or wanted him.

* * *

><p>The door opened and where she lay on the floor, Thea could only see the shadow of the man who marched in front of her. She didn't have to guess who it was she knew. <em>Another round…I don't think I'll survive another round.<em>

"Get up," Appo's despicable voice demanded. How was she supposed to get up? Every muscle screamed at her not to move, every pour on her skin threatened to split open and spill more blood. Thea didn't know if she could get her legs and feet to cooperate with her.

"Get up! Don't make me have to tell you again," he warned. Mustering the strength, Thea gritted her teeth and slowly unfolded herself from the fetal position she had been in and balanced herself on her hands and feet. She tried not to gasp as the pain wreaked havoc on her tortured body, especially on her lower half where Appo and Bow had assaulted her the most.

_Don't let him see you as weak,_ she thought to herself. Thea said a silent prayer for strength and willpower; she clamored up onto her feet and stood shakily and naked in front of Appo. With the all the dignity she could gather, Thea raised her bruised chin in an act of defiance and looked at this man straight at his T-Shape visor. They didn't say a word for a few minutes it was a tense stare down. Appo raised his hand and Thea forced herself not to flinch as he reached to undo his helmet. In seconds she was looking into his feral eyes.

"So much determination, no wonder the GAR kept you. It will be a pleasure breaking you in," he ran his gloved finger down her battered face. It took all of Thea's restraint not to knock his hand away and spit in his face. "Cover yourself up." He pushed a blanket into her chest, causing her to stumble back a few steps. She looked widely down at the dirty, smelly cover and then back at the commander.

"Cover your shame. Hurry up," he ordered. Thea tentatively took the blanket and wrapped it around her injured body thankful for its warmth despite its grainy feel. Appo roughly grabbed her by the neck and with a squeak she could not suppress, he shoved her in front of him and out of the room. It was almost too much to walk and she hobbled along, ignoring any gawking looks from passerby's.

"Where are you taking me?" Thea bravely asked. If she was going to be led to her death, she wanted to know.

"Does it matter Red? It'll be the last home you'll ever have," Appo pushed her, causing her to stumble forwards and almost loose her grip on her blanket. _I have to get out of here, or die trying. I'll be dead either way. _They passed down another hall and she looked over to her right. A window was quickly approaching as were two troopers.

_One…_Appo wouldn't expect it with her depleted state, _two..._the troopers would provide a cushion and barrier, _three! _Thea gathered all her might she could and luckily with surprise on her side she threw all her body weight into the troopers, knocking them into the window.

She vaguely heard Appo's furious bellow as the three of them fell and plummeted to the ground. It wasn't as long as a drop as she thought it was (thankfully) but the landing was still hard. The crack in her arm was audible as was her wail of pain. She landed on top of one of the troopers and nether one of them moved.

_Get up Thea,_ she urged herself. _Get up and run. _But she couldn't. Her body was spent and broken and the running of armored boots filled her ears. She was pushed unceremoniously off the fallen trooper and cried out when she rolled onto her broken arm. The two unmoving troopers were picked up and hauled away while deeces were trained on Thea.

A single pair of boots approached her and she turned her head to see Appo stare down at her. "Broken, bleeding and nowhere to go, Red, what will it take to make you learn?"

"I'll never give up," she snarled. Appo turned to his left and right signaling the men to leave and without hesitation they complied. Appo watched them with bored interest as Thea breathed heavily and began to shake as her body started to slip into shock. Shards of glass ripped diamond patterns all over her and blood stained the grey concrete.

Suddenly with lightening reflexes Appo bent down and grabbed her hair, forcing her off the ground. Thea released a glass shattering scream, some of the troopers around even turned to see what was going on, but did not stop the commander. The blanket had fallen from her body and she was completely exposed to every eye.

"What would Echo think if we took those pretty looks away from you? What would he think if you were branded as the 501st whore?"

"He would think more of me than ever of you, you scum bag," Thea gasped and winced as he tugged on her hair.

"Let's find out," Appo took out his knife and started to carve. He started from above her hairline and then ran the knife along her face. Thea clawed at his armored arm with her good hand, shrieked at the top of her lungs and kicked out with her bloodied legs. Luckily for Thea consciousness did not linger and darkness soon consumed her.

She awoke much later realizing the bed she was on was a bit softer. Opening an eye she recognized she was in an infirmary and dawned in a medical gown. Her arm was stiff and noticed it was in a bio-cast, her other arm and legs had numerous bacta and tape bandages. She raised her hand to her face and felt where Appo had sliced it had also been bandaged.

"Good you're awake," a mechanical voice startled her. A 2-1B medical droid walked up to her and began to address her dressings. "I am to notify the guards outside when you have wakened."

"Wait," she raspingly said. She just needed a few minutes before being roughed up again. The droid looked at her with its uncaring, unemotional robotic face. Is this what her life had come to?

"I am to…" it started to repeat itself.

Thea tuned it out and laid back down as the medical droid retrieved the guards. It was only minutes before the hauled her away into hell.

* * *

><p>"How did you finally escape?" the bile kept threatening to rise in Cody's throat and he fought to keep it down. How could anyone be so cruel? So inhuman? How could anyone take away such beauty and love from a person? How had he not known Thea then? He had been a part of the prisoner intake, so where was she? Would have it made a difference? No, probably not. She probably would have died if she had been a part of his cell block. Shaking off the shivers Cody listened to the rest of her horrific story.<p>

"Appo and Bow were called away on a mission and I took every opportunity I could get to make my escape. I got caught, punished and sent back to my cell. I honestly thought I was going to die there. Then I thought to myself, dying wouldn't be so bad. I would be reunited with Echo. During one of the feeding times, the disgusting gruel they had the audacity to call food, I tried an escape again.

"Seeing me as a frail, scared and defeated woman, what harm could I do? Well I wasn't defeated and would never be. With all my energy I had, I ran at the trooper knocking him over. We wrestled briefly and I somehow got a hold of his blaster. Picturing Echo, I couldn't force myself to shoot him no matter how wrong they did to me. Though mind you, I would kill Appo and Bow if I had the chance."

"You and me both," Cody said under his breath. More than kill, he would make them suffer endless amounts of pain before they could reach the blissful darkness of death.

"I took his armor and made my way out. It sounds too simple I know, but believe me or not, I walked right out of that building of nightmares and left Coruscant."

"Oh god, Thea," Cody choked, "and I had you pinned that night. You must have thought I was going to…" He dry heaved into the tall plants, but his stomach would not release his demons.

"Cody," she lightly touched his shoulder. Cody slowly stood up and wiped his mouth. Looking sorrowfully at her, she could see his heart in his eyes. "I didn't scream."

"You could have," he gave out a shuttering breath.

"Yes, I could have, but I knew you weren't going to hurt me. If I screamed you would have been a dead man. A dead man cannot heal."

When he attempted to reached out to stroke her face, she flinched and looked away. "Thea, please look at me."

"I can't Cody."

"Please," he slightly begged.

Her dark eyes slowly lifted and looked at him. Unshed tears glazed and she tried to control her trembling lip. "Heal with me."

"I can't."

"Yes you can honey," Cody dared to take a step closer and held his breath to see if she would flinch away from him again. When she didn't, he slowly let it out.

"I am damaged." She quivered. Tears on either side trickled down her face.

"We all are. That's what makes us human," he leaned in closer and gently cupped her jaw.

"I don't want to forget Echo," she whispered against his lips.

"I don't want to forget Barriss. Let us celebrate their memory in the new love we can create between each other." He kissed her gently and tenderly at first. He could taste the saltiness of the tears mixed with the sweetness of the berries. It was divine. Better than divine, it was heaven.

* * *

><p>They walked into the house completely ignoring the stares of those who were still up and sitting in the main living room. Climbing silently up the stairs, Cody and Thea made their way into Cody's room.<p>

Jusik watched as the pair disappeared into the room, turning and softly sighing to himself.

"She was never yours Bard'ika," Kal Skirata lightly reprimanded.

"I know, Kal'buir, but he doesn't deserve someone like her," Jusik scowled at Skirata.

Skirata nodded his head thoughtfully. "Perhaps, perhaps not, Bard'ika. Even the most damned, broken and grieved find salvation."

"Kal," Jusik slapped the older man's shoulder, "and sometimes a good ale solves all the problems," Skirata gave a hearty laugh as Jusik made his way toward the kitchen.


	23. Chapter 23

_Hi all,_

_The rating goes up in this chapter as well. It's my first real "M" chapter. I hope it came out okay! _

* * *

><p><em>So take a breath<em>  
><em>My dear friend<em>  
><em>Take it slow<em>  
><em>And let go<em>

Thea stood ridged by the door and with watchful eyes she followed Cody as he moved around the room trying to make everything comfortable for her. He turned on the soft lamp that was on the end table, turned down the blankets and fluffed the pillows. He then turned to her and rubbed his sweaty hands nervously on his thighs.

"I won't hurt you Thea, nor will I let anyone hurt you ever again," Cody slowly approached; his palms up in a non-threatening manner and showing her that he meant no harm.

"Don't promise me that Cody," she trembled.

Cody rested his hands on her biceps, gently curling his fingers around her arms. "I _am_ promising you that." She willed the shivers to stop, but the little voice inside of her kept taunting her that this would only end up in regret.

"Can I show you Thea? Can I show you how it's really supposed to be?" Cody purred into her ear. "I won't touch you without your permission."

"Oh Cody," Thea sobbed. "I'm so scared."

"If you don't like something, just tell me, I'll stop immediately. You are in charge. Just remember that. You are the one in charge," he murmured and kissed her forehead. His lips followed the trail of the long, serrated scar, over the bridge of her nose and to her soft lips. He cautiously pressed his tongue against her closed teeth, asking for permission to enter her mouth. She granted it to him and he tasted the sweetness of her mouth. Cody ended the kiss, setting back a little bit so that he could look at her face. He wanted to make sure that she was okay. Apprehension still riddled in her dark eyes, but a new twinkle shown in them.

Cody quirked a smile at her and kissed her again, this time he put more passion into it. A small, very feminine moan vibrated from the back of Thea's throat. Encouraged, his lips left hers and traveled to her jaw, to her neck and finding the spot between her neck and shoulder. He lightly nipped at the skin causing her to gasp and shudder. "Cody," she groaned and he grinned to himself, taking some pride that he could cause that pleasure for her. She was relaxing; he could feel it in her posture and how she was leaning into him.

He took her earlobe into his mouth a gently sucked on it, Thea clutched his arms in support of her legs weakening and falling from under her. _Just like the dream! This is no dream Thea, this is real. He is very, very real._

It was sort of a distraction, Cody had to admit. As he continued to rain kisses, finding her pleasure spots, he began to waltz her back to the bed. Within a few steps her legs bumped the bed. Thea broke away from him and looked down at the bed with wide eyes.

"Don't be afraid," Cody kissed her collar bone.

"I'm trying," she closed her eyes and put her hands on top of his, halting him from unbuttoning her blouse. "Can I see what you look like first?"

"Anything honey," Cody said throatily. "I have scars though, ugly scars all over my body."

"I'm not any different Cody," Thea kissed his jaw and slowly and tantalizingly curled the bottom of his shirt in her hands and lifted it up over his body. After it was off of him, she clutched the shirt to her chest as she stared at his torso. He was lined with battle scars that bacta could not heal or he did not get treated because he was off fighting at the time.

"I told you it wasn't pretty," he groused.

Thea did not drop his shirt, but continued to hold it in one hand as she traced one of the longest wounds inflicted on his body. It started from his collar bone, zigzagged down to his left side and was smothered in rough skin. She noticed a similar laceration on his right side, though smoother and not as long, but must have been just as painful.

"I was caught in an explosion. Not even my armor could protect me from the extent of the heat and shrapnel. General Kenobi saved my life that day," Cody's breath caught in his throat. Thea peered up at him. His face had suddenly gone blank.

"Don't leave me Cody," Thea moved her hand to the side of his face, forcing him to look at her.

"I owed the man my life and I repaid him by shooting him in cold blood. I'm a monster Thea."

Moving her hand behind his head, running her fingers through his clean and clipped hair, she could feel him shake. "Not a monster, but a man with ghosts. If your general were here, what would you say to him?"

"I would beg for his forgiveness," Cody quaked. "And because he was a Jedi, he would accept it."

"No, because he was your friend, he would accept it." Moving her hand back to cup his cheek, she felt him press deeper into her palm. He moved his head so he could press soft and tender kissed over her wrist, traveling up her arm and then up to the top of her shoulder. He could hear another soft gasp exhale from her and goose bumps form under his lips.

Cody began to unbutton her blouse, but Thea put a halting hand on top of his again. He looked at her questioningly. He could physically see her take a large swallow and her grip on his hand tightened. "It's okay honey," he soothed. _He called me honey in the dream. Should I pinch myself and make sure we aren't in the dream? _Realizing Cody was patiently waiting for an answer, Thea never answered herself and she barely nodded for him to continue. Her grip loosened though she did not take her hand off of his. One by one the buttons came loose and the blouse opened, reviling her scarred body to him.

He could feel himself fill with suffocating fury as her body; her beautiful white skin had been permanently tarnished by the vicious and brutal acts of his genes. Long, dark finger prints eternally marked where those bastards had manhandled her; small scars of where the glass had ripped and stabbed at her when she had tried to make an attempted escape lined the inner parts of her arm and rib cage, almost like little tattoos.

Cody took another shuddering breath and closed his eyes. _How could anyone do this to a person?_ He wanted to weep for her, for her pain; for the torment his brothers had caused her. He wanted to weep for Barriss, for losing her and the selfish pride the troopers felt when they caused her death. He wanted to cry for his general and plead for forgiveness.

He reopened his eyes when he felt Thea take his hand and place it on the button of her trousers. "I want you to see me as how I am. I am not pretty underneath these clothes."

"Thea, you're stunning," Cody hummed against her lips. He kissed her to distraction as they both unhurriedly undid the button and her breath caught as Cody caringly placed his hands on her hips and pushed down her pants. He took a step back to admire her, Thea turning a bright red. Scars in diamond shape forms littered her legs along with the similar traces of finger prints. _If I ever find Appo he's a dead man._

"Can…can I see you?" She asked shyly. Cody didn't know what it was, but the way she was staring at him, the way she asked so timidly made his blood prickle with desire. His hands ached to grab and throw her on the bed and ravaged her, bring her to heights never thought possible, but that was exactly what she was afraid of.

Putting his male urges to the side for the time, he tried to calm his throbbing libido. "Yes," he answered huskily. She raised a shaky hand to his belt buckle and suddenly froze.

"I can't do this," she started to pant. "I'm sorry Cody, I just can't." Thea backed up until the bed forced her to sit down. She was breathing heavily, as if going into a panic attack. "I can't, I'm sorry. I'm sorry," she repeated as she began to weep into her hands.

Cody was at her side in an instant, wrapping her in his arms and letting her cry. She convulsed with uncontrolled shivers and tears leaking through her fingers; dripping onto his pants. He didn't care, Cody just held her. Taking one of the blankets off the bed he wrapped both of them up, hoping the warmth would help her trembles. He rubbed her back until the sobs began to subside and turned into little hiccups.

"I'm sorry," she apologized again.

"There's nothing to be sorry about," he assured. She turned her head so that she was looking up at him and he was looking down at her, their lips only a breath away.

"Can we just lie together?" The words were familiar to her ears. She had asked Echo the same thing on his last day of leave. But this was different, times were different; she was different. It was hard to trust anyone with her body, soul and heart no matter the kindness he may show to her.

"Anything honey," he kissed her temple. Cody removed the blanket from his shoulders and tucked it around her as he scooted to one side of the bed, making more room for her. He held his breath when she didn't move, hoping that she didn't have second thoughts and fleeing from the room. Thea slowly lifted her legs onto the bed and scooted herself up so that her head rested on the fluffed up pillow. She still had the blanket tightly wrapped around her as she lay tensely on the mattress looking forlornly at Cody. Without needing to say anything, Cody took her in his arms; tucking head under his chin. It was hard to ignore the warm and soft body pressed up against him, but she needed to feel safe and not manhandled.

"You're safe Thea," he cooed. She shifted a little under him so that she was now resting in the crook of his neck and he could feel the soft puffs of her breath. "You're safe."

* * *

><p>Sometime later that night Thea had shifted in Cody's embrace and now had her back pressed against his strong form, his arm still securely wrapped around her waist and she could feel the steady and warm breaths against the back of her neck. She felt safe for the first time in a very long time laying in his arms despite the turbulent start to their relationship. <em>Relationship,<em> it seemed strange to think that way about them, but wasn't that what they were trying to create?

"Cody," Thea murmured softly, "Are you awake?"

"Yes," his warm breath caressed her neck.

"Why aren't you asleep?"

"Why aren't you?" He retorted. Thea slightly shifted to cover the shivers that threatened to run down her back as Cody's voice reverberated through his chest and onto her. She didn't want to admit it, but it was starting to turn her on.

"I asked you first," she put a slight teasing tone into her voice and she heard the "humph" from him. With a small tug on her waist, Thea turned over to face him. "What did you do after you left the GAR?" She asked cautiously. The scars that littered his body weren't just from war. He was a victim of the cruel hand the galaxy dealt out. Only too aware of the deep seated anguish and pain that resided inside, Thea delicately traced her finger around the scar that rimmed around his eye.

"That one was war related," he said neutrally and carefully took her wrist and placed her hand on his broad chest where a long, straight lesion rested. He guided her hand from where it started below his right clavicle and ran over his pectoral ending just below his last rib. He released her wrist, but her hand remained on his body. "This one was on the job."

"What kind of job Cody?" Thea dreaded the answer and as he continued to look at her trying hard not to run from his shame. His face was turning beat red and as the fever traveled down his neck, the rocks settled hard in Thea's stomach. "Oh," she gasped, "Oh Cody," she whimpered and moved her hand up to touch his face, but from long ingrained instinct Cody cringed.

"I needed the money," he said darkly, "I was a clone in a corrupt government. I started with nothing and ended with nothing so I had to find something and quick. I needed money to get off planet, to eat, to get new armor; to survive. Citizens were angry at their government, but weren't allowed to show it, to express it. I was a clone, government property and I was an easy way to take their frustrations out on. I'm not proud of what I did, Thea. Many times it got out of hand as you can see and I found other trades. By that time I didn't have much pride or dignity left either. I know what it feels like to be broken as well. I took on whatever I could find that would get me what I needed or wanted. I guess it was a gift that I wanted a bit of revenge from Rex and found him. Otherwise I probably would be dead by now."

_He knows he knows exactly what I went through…_Thea mourned. _He knows the pain, the suffering, the loss and betrayal. _

"Why didn't you take the shot when Fives offered it to you?"

"Because I need to know I have a reason to have it. Barriss was my reason before, but she's no longer here."

"I'm here."

Cody searched her deep brown eyes with wishful hope. "Can I show you Thea? Can I show you how love is supposed to be? I know it's scary, by god I know. The hardest hits from a man can leave a bruise, but the tenderness of touches can heal the soul. Please let me show you, let me know that I can be a good lover to you."

She ran her fingers over the scar on his chest again. Could she love him? Thea lifted her eyes only to meet his golden brown ones and see hope, despair, passion, angst, love and his heart completely exposed to her. "You are asking me to love you Cody," she said hoarsely.

"I know Thea," he rested his forehead against hers. She closed her eyes tightly shut and listened to what her heart had to say instead of her screaming mind. _What do you have to say heart? What should I do?_ She slowly opened them and an unrestrained tear slid down her cheek.

"Please don't cry honey," Cody whispered.

"Show me," she trembled against his lips. Like lovers experiencing a kiss for their first time, Cody gently placed his lips upon hers in an uncertain, but inquisitive brush. Despite them being from the same genetic make-up, Cody was so different than Echo. Thea and Echo had never made love before, but they had kissed and she loved how his lips felt pressed against hers. He reminded her of a delectable candy, sweet and savory causing her to crave for more. Echo was always gentle, but there was a hidden passion ready to be released. Thea knew that he would have been a wonderful and caring lover if they had ever made it that far.

Cody-Cody was a combination of earth and heaven mixed with reined in hunger that she could taste on the tip of her tongue. He wasn't just passionate, but empathetic, as if he could feel her soul with every little touch and movement they made. It both frightened and astounded Thea that he filled and warmed her when the cold and darkness fought so hard to claim her. It didn't stand a chance with Cody by her side, but this power also terrified her. He could still hurt her, what was to stop him? _Nothing. _

She felt him move down to her jaw and then trailed kisses down to the crook of her neck, remembering that was a sensitive spot for her. She did not disappoint as a soft pant escaped between her lips and shivers consumed her. Closing her eyes and trying to relax into Cody's loving caresses; Thea felt him travel to her ear, gently nibbling on her lobe as his free hand began to make its' own journey on her body.

_Here it comes,_ she began to dread as his hand lightly skimmed her flat belly down to her panty line. Her heart beat wildly in her chest and she willed herself not to deflect Cody's hand, instead she fisted the bed sheet into both of her palms. With her body already shivering, it wasn't difficult to move into full on trembles and she could not stop it no matter how much she pled with herself. _He's going to be so disappointed…maybe we can just get it over with without too much incident._

Something wasn't right and Cody had to stop. He could feel the tremors course through her, even though she was trying gallantly to hold her body still. Bracing himself on his forearms, Cody looked down at Thea and just about wept. Her face was scrunched and eyes tightly shut as if readying for the next blow to come. Her arms spread on either side of her clutching the bed sheet like a life preserver and the rest of her body tensely shook with uncontrolled nerves. As if he needed anymore conformation, Cody gently ran his hand down the inner part of one of her thighs and she instinctively bunched the muscles there and crossed her legs.

_Thea…_he sobbed mentally. How he wanted to curse the galaxy for letting this lovely woman become so fearful. No beauty should have to suffer in such torment. Cody sat all the way up and folded his legs under him and called to her, "Thea."

Noticing that the touches and caresses had stopped, Thea peeked an eye open to see Cody sitting up and looking down at her with a mixture of forlorn and concern. "Cody?" She asked confused. "Are you…I mean don't you…?" She fumbled for the right words.

"More than anything Thea, but not with you afraid of me," Cody looked somber.

"I'm not afraid," she replied, but there wasn't much conviction behind her words. He raised a skeptic brow and a sigh of defeat and frustration hissed through her nose.

"Sit up for a moment love," he commanded kindly. She looked at him as if he had two heads.

"What?"

"Trust me," Cody assured. "Sit up and move over a bit." Thea slowly sat up and complied, watching him with a mixture of interest and confusion as he positioned his body where she had been lying only seconds before.

"What are you doing?" Thea repeated again as she eyed his body.

"Thea, you'll have complete control. We'll take our time; go at your pace. Whatever you say goes; I won't even touch you if you don't allow me to," Cody said. Thea couldn't believe what she was hearing. This man, this strong, powerful man of war was submitting to her, letting her take control. _I am in control…_She didn't realize her mouth had been hanging open until Cody's fingers touched the bottom of her chin and gently closed her mouth. "That'll be the only time I touch you unless you say so." He smiled.

_I am in control…I am in…_ "What do I do?" She asked dumbly.

"Anything you want honey," he replied thickly. As much as he was trying to control himself, it was becoming a bit harder seeing her in just her underwear, but he would not give in.

Anything? Thea swallowed hard and let her eyes skim over his glorious, well-toned body and even blushed when her eyes landed on the well pronounced bulge in his pants. There was no doubt his want for her, but was restraining himself so that she would no feel fear from him. With that notion, Thea wanted nothing more to touch Cody, kiss him and give him what he desired and what her body desired.

It could have been hours for all Cody knew, but when nothing happened he pressed his head deep into the pillow and closed his eyes feeling the intense defeat of failure. Cody hoped that giving Thea the control it would show her the love he felt, the willingness of how far he would go for her. Handing over control and being at ones mercy was something he had never planned on doing again, but this was different. Wasn't it? Or was she just going to throw it back in his face? He had spent so much time building walls, owning his self-dependence; it did scare him to think that this small gift could be abused so easily.

His eyes flew open as fluttery strokes to his chest could be felt and Cody peered down to see Thea lightly tracing with her delicate fingers the longest of his wounds. Her lips soon followed the path of her fingers and Cody's head fell back onto the pillow, eyes once again shutting this time in pleasure. Her kisses didn't stop there, she continued across his stomach and up his chest, licking and softly nipping at his skin. A soft hiss escaped through his teeth as her mouth sought and found his sensitive nipple. He felt her teeth take a nip and an unsuppressed groan filled the room.

Thea looked up from the ministrations and stared at Cody's beautiful face. His head was slightly tilted up, mouth parted and eyes half way closed. She had never seen someone so sexy, so glorious all at once and she wanted him, all of him. Cody wasn't just beautiful on the outside, but on the inside as well. In a rush, she crushed her lips to his She moved from her position beside him to sitting on his waist, each of her legs folded on either side of him entrapping him below her. _I am in control._ Thea felt Cody tentatively place his large hands on her thighs, her skin feeling like velvet under his much coarser ones and she again tensed.

Breaking their kiss, she rested her forehead against his, both trying to catch a breath and a clear thought. "Cody," she breathed.

"Just let go Thea," Cody returned heavily. She opened her eyes, now glowing with fervor heat and sat up. Reaching for both of his hands, Thea took them and placed them on her back where her bra was latched. Cody stared at her chest for a moment and then looked into her dark eyes. _Are you sure?_ His expression asked. She gave a small nod. The material was easily unhooked and released. He placed his hands on her small shoulders and guided the straps down her arms to revile her full breasts to him. Permanent marks and lacerations scarred her porcelain skin even there. There wasn't one place her attackers had left her without a reminder of their brutality. If Cody hadn't known the story, he would have said she looked like a marbled mosaic.

Feeling self-conscious of her scars, Thea wrapped her arms around her chest, covering the ugliness from him, but Cody gently placed his hand on top of her arm and she slowly dropped them.

"I'm sorry Cody," she apologized mournfully, "I wish I was pure. I wish I was unmarked and unblemished for you."

His voice stuck in his throat as he quickly sat up. "You," Cody swallowed and tried again, "You are perfect." Thea tilted her head and pursed her lips together. She sat back a little against his propped up legs allowing him to see her better.

"I am far from perfect," she whispered.

"You're perfect to me." He lifted his hand and began to gently run his palm down her silky neck, around her collar bone and then kissed the skin between her breasts. Cody wished he could kiss her scars away, but it was an unrealistic thought. He could hear her gasp hitch as his lips traveled to her breast and lavished attention on it.

"Coooody…" her moan exaggerated his name and he had never heard his name ever sound as sexy as it did coming from her mouth. Desire pooled at his loins as her sultry voice purred into his ear. Her whole body began to relax as he moved to the other and brought her nipple into his mouth, lightly nipping and sucking on it. His hand wandered further down to her flat stomach, he traced the outer of her belly button and felt the quivers against his body. This time he knew they were good. He let go of her breast and moved up her jaw and back to her luscious lips, once again driving her to distraction. Or maybe she was driving him to distraction.

His hand made it to her panty line and began to go under when suddenly her hand made a hasty grab for his wrist. Everything seemed to halt. "Thea?" Cody asked concern. _Please don't stop Thea. Please…_

"Can I…can I see you first?" She asked. Without a word, Cody lay down on his back, Thea crawling off his waist, back to his side and glanced downward. She timidly reached out toward the button of his pants and halted again. _I don't know if I can do this. He's going to hate me, think I am a tease and force me to do it any way. No, he's not Appo. He wouldn't, he'll just be disappointed. _Thea felt a warmness cover her hand and looked to see Cody's hand on top of hers. He's extra strength and support was what she needed and proceeded to place her hand on top of the button. Her eyes kept sneaking a glance at the bulge centered in his pants and her anxieties began to build. _I can do this. I can…_She quickly undid the button, luckily there was only one and now for the zipper.

She stared at the metal object as if looking at it long enough it would undo itself, but no such luck. With his hand still on top of hers, she slowly let the zipper down. A sigh of what sounded like relief came from Cody, but Thea tried to tune it out and focus. _Okay, almost there. _She moved her hand away from his and to the waist line of his pants. Giving a tug, he lifted his hips so that together they could pull down both his pants and briefs in one fell swoop. Thea's eyes practically popped when she saw him. He was huge! No wonder Appo and Bow had hurt her. This appendage, this male weapon had haunted, taunted and created demons for her to run from.

As if sensing where her thoughts were heading, Cody called, "Thea. Remember you're in control honey." Thea shook her head and slowly made a reach for him. A deep guttural and very masculine male growl came from Cody and filled Thea with a new sensation. As she delicately held him, softly stroking him with her thumb, a new sense of power fell onto her shoulders. This… extremity caused her unmistakable anguish and misery and yet she held him literally in the palm of her hand. Cody was putty, ready to be molded into whatever she wanted. And right now she wanted pleasure. To give him pleasure, for him to give her pleasure.

Her strokes became longer as his member grew and swelled. "Thea," he moaned, "Please don't stop," he begged. His breathing was shallow; perspiration beaded his forehead and started glistening on his chest. It gave him a unique sheen and only enhanced his already magnificent body. Thea leaned over, her breasts pressing against his chest, giving him a passion filled kissed as her ministrations continued. He moaned into her mouth, begging, hoping; praying she wouldn't stop.

Suddenly she did as did his heart. What was she doing? What was she thinking? Cody's held his breath as his eyes tried to focus on what she was doing. Thea, never taking her eyes off of his, shifted so that she could pull the rest of the barrier that was between them off and moved to poise above him. Cody gulped, not believing that this was really about to happen. He had to touch her and hesitantly placed his hands back on her thighs and was surprised when she did not tense or flinch.

"Can you call me honey again?" she whispered, still poised over him. He was hers and he would oblige.

"Anything honey," he granted hoarsely. _Exactly like the dream only better. _He moved his hands up to her hips as she slowly lowered herself onto him, both becoming breathless as he filled within her. They froze as a moment of completeness consumed them. She made the first move, rocking against his hips and barely breaking any contact between them.

"Thea," he groaned her name. This is how it was supposed to be as waves of ecstasy coursed through them. No groping, no biting, no clawing or name calling, just pure pleasure.

Thea leaned over Cody, gipping onto his strong shoulders and ground her hips so that he was if possible deeper into her. "Touch me Cody," she kissed into his ear.

His hands that were rocking in with the motion of her hips moved to her breasts, cupping them, caressingly ever so gently and dotingly with the tips of his fingers. With each of her lunges he parried with thrusts of his own. "Thea…" he was soon whimpering against her neck. This big, strong warrior was actually reduced to whimpers. He was close, so close; she could feel it. His body tensed against her and he roared out her name. She collapsed onto his chest, still buried inside of him; hearing his thumping heartbeat.

Thea suddenly felt a hand sneak around her waist and with a squeal, Cody had flipped her, their places changed, him on top and her on bottom and still buried deeply inside of her. He searched her glazed eyes asking for permission.

"I'm not afraid," she said as she ran her hands through his now sweat soaked hair. There was no fear in her eyes, not of him. Cody gave her a smile and lovingly kissed her lips as he began to rock inside of her. This time it was Thea who moaned and pressed her head deeply into the pillow as he brought her to new and brilliant heights. His hand traveled down her ribcage to the flat planes of her belly again. Then she felt him touch her there._ No, she wasn't asleep! This was very, very real._ It was odd at first, feeling him inside of her and both touching her with his fingers, but oh the bliss. She didn't know if she could stretch to accommodate both, but she did.

She rocked hard against him, searching, wanting more. He gave her more. Her legs instinctively circled his waist, entrapping him not that he minded one bit. His eyes never left her face, watching her as each thrust brought a new gasp; new pleasured smile to her lips. Cody wanted, no needed to hear her scream his name.

"Cody," she breathed. No, it had to be louder than that. He pumped harder, kissed her everywhere he could; taking her ear into his mouth forever branding her his. Thea could feel it pooling in her stomach and between her womanhood. It was something she thought she would never feel again, but there it was. Building, tingling… His body rocked and his fingers danced beautifully to the music they created. She couldn't control the volume of her voice anymore. She couldn't control anything anymore and she found she really wasn't afraid of that. Thea was lost in his actions and begged for more. That was until the galaxy exploded before her eyes. It was both beautiful and frightening to see the world as you know it shatter into a million pieces. She could hear her own voice scream his name mixed with his own deep, husky timber.

Instead of collapsing his full weight onto her, Cody fell onto his side trying to catch his breath. Gathering her into his arms, they listened to each other's pounding hearts until the rhythmic beats were once again normal.

It wasn't that they were looking for replacements for loves lost that would never be the reason. Echo and Barriss had died, but not in vain.

Thea shifted so that she could look up at Cody as he peered down at her. _Thank you for freeing me. _

_Thank you for loving me. _Their bodies and minds spent, Thea and Cody slowly drifted into a much needed sleep. For the first time that night as Thea lay cocooned in his embrace the nightmares did not come.

* * *

><p>The next morning, Cody carefully untangled himself from Thea making sure as not to wake her and tiptoed quietly out of the bedroom. He paused at the doorway and glanced back at her sleeping form. Thea's face was relaxed; a faint smile lifted at her lips. At that, he knew he was making the right decision. Closing the door behind him, he went in search of Mij Gilamar.<p>

* * *

><p>"Are you sure Cody?" the Mando doctor asked.<p>

"More than anything," Cody's reply was definite. Gilamar nodded and readied the syringe. Cody felt the cool sensation of the alcohol swab followed by a sharp sting. There was no turning back now.

"Take it easy for a few days son," Gilamar advised. Cody rubbed the spot where the needle pricked him. "Welcome to a full life." Looking at the doctor, Cody beamed a full fledge smile at him.

* * *

><p><em>So...<em>

_I know, no Rex or Ahoska in this one, but they WILL be in the next. The story is wrapping up soon, things will be coming to a conclusion, but Rex and Ahsoka have a few loose ends to tie up before we say The End. _

_A BIG thank you to everyone who has read and reviewed! You make it all worth while! =) _


	24. Chapter 24

It was a little too late to start to have these thoughts, but Rex had plenty of time as he laid ill in bed for the last week from the shot he had received that stopped the rapid aging process in his body. He reflected on the men who were left behind on Coruscant and would never have the opportunity for freedom and a full life. Good men, men like Jesse, Dogma, Tup, Boil, Chopper and so many more who were forced to live out their shortened lives in darkness and evil. He felt guilty for abandoning his men, his brothers.

As Rex finished dressing himself, he craned his neck up as he heard the door open and Ahsoka make her way inside. The guilt he had been harboring almost completely dissolved as his reason for leaving and living approached him.

"Are you sure you don't want to rest one more day?" Ahsoka sat down next to Rex and ran concerned eyes over him. "You were pretty sick the last couple of days…"

Rex placed a finger over her burgundy lips to quiet her. Ahsoka's shoulders relaxed and a smile replaced her worried frown. Dropping his hand Rex assured, "I'm feeling fine. Better than fine Ahs'ika, I'm feeling full. I'm not one to sit in bed all day while there are things to be done."

"You've already made plans while in bed?" She asked curiously. Ahsoka knew Rex would never be able to sit still for long, none of these men would. They may have long lives now, but their training and habits would never die.

"Yes, actually I have," a gleam shown in his russet eyes. Did Rex have any idea the power he held over her by just the look in his eyes? _No and it needs to stay that way!_ Ahsoka mentally laughed.

"Well…" Ahsoka bit the bottom of her lip in anticipation. Rex was about to open his mouth and answer her when Ahsoka let out a little gasp.

Instant alarm filled him and he grasped her shoulders. "Are you okay? Ahsoka, what's the matter?"

Before she got to answer the sound of Bella's voice bellowed from the hallway. "Fives!"

"Yes," his faint reply could be heard from down stairs.

"Fives!" Bella's voice sounded a little more strained this time. Ahsoka and Rex looked at each other; Rex's eyes had gone a little wider. Ahsoka grinned and nodded. "Fives, nerf baby!" Rex looked baffled and mouthed nerf baby, but his question was soon answered as what sounded like a stampede came charging up the stairs and down the hall.

Bouncing off the bed, Rex and Ahsoka hurried out of the room to be almost trampled by Fives who toppled to a stop right in front of Bella. She was clutching her stomach and taking deep breaths of air; the tips of her lekku curled and trembled as a heavy and sharp contraction hit her.

"For real? She's coming for real?" Fives exclaimed.

Another pained expression crossed Bella's usually calm face. "Yes dear, I'm sure." Fives let out a whoop and then reality began to set in along with shock and panic and filled the stoic ARC. "I'm going to be a father." He turned to Rex and Ahsoka who had approached the couple. Ahsoka stepped around the men and assisted Bella back into the bedroom and toward the bed; Rex stayed next his panic frozen friend.

"We don't know about being fathers Fives, but we do know a few things," Rex started. He waited for the younger man to look at him. "We know how to defend when others run. We know how to protect when others harm. We know how to care when others disregard and we know how to love when others hate. If you can just do even one of those things you'll be the father this child needs."

In an uncharacteristic move between the men, Fives wrapped his arms around Rex and hugged him. "Thank you brother," he whispered. Rex tensed momentarily. The gesture was so "unmanly" but times were different; they were different. Relaxing, Rex returned the embrace.

"You better get in there," Rex gestured toward the room.

"Oh right!" Fives jumped, spinning on his heels and ran into the room. Rex shook his head and laughed to himself. Hearing footsteps behind him once again, he turned to see the resident doctor, Mij Gilamar, Kal Skirata and Laseema who was carrying clean cloths and towels coming down the hall.

"I don't hear the cries of a baby yet so I assume we're not too late," Mij gave Rex a light pat on his arm as he passed by and entered the room. The aliit leader stopped next to Rex.

"Fives is really nervous," Rex said, nerves sneaking into his own voice. He wasn't sure why he was nervous, maybe more anxious as he leaned forward ever so slightly onto the tips of his toes and tried peering into the bedroom. Rex could make out a low, somewhat suppressed pain filled groan and felt his heart jump. _What is wrong with me? It's not like it's Ahoska that's in there. Maybe one day…_At that thought Rex could feel his pulse start to race. _Calm down son! You're friend needs your support and you're acting like a cadet on his first day of training!_

"He doesn't seem to be the only one," Skirata looked perceptively at Rex.

"None of us have seen an infant being born before sir," Rex stated. "By the sounds of things, it doesn't seem like an enjoyable experience and I can't imagine putting Ahoska through that amount of pain." He had worked so hard to keep her away from pain, why would he want to cause it and especially knowing he was half the source of it?

A smile cracked on the older Mando's lips. Birth was a foreign concept to all clones, they were crudely tube bred and scientifically raised so of course any natural form of birthing and raising would be intimidating and alien.

"Trust me my boy; the pain is nothing next to that first moment when you get to hold that bundle you have been waiting almost a year for. Well, at least that's what the women tell me," Skirata laughed and Rex just gave him an unsure look. "One day you'll find out lad." Voices inside the room brought their attention toward the impending celebration and just as Skirata was about to step inside, Mij stepped out.

"Is everything okay?" Skirata asked concerned. Bella had become close to the Mando's heart, though no one would ever replace the adoptive daughter he had lost the night of Order 66. Bella and the rest of the women here had helped ease the pain of Etain's loss and with the impending births it gave Skirata new hope for the future.

"Everything is fine; Bella is doing very well. Fives hand may not be fine after this," Mij joked. Rex looked worried and Mij explained, "Little did Fives know that when in pain, a woman's strength can double in intensity." Rex made an O with his mouth, understanding now. "Her contractions are too far apart right now and her water hasn't broke. I'll keep checking every ten to fifteen minutes on her progress, but at this rate we're looking at a couple of hours."

Rex winced. A couple of hours in that pain? _No thank you!_ He vaguely heard Skirata thank Mij and watched him walk into the room. Making his own feet move, Rex stood in the door way and looked at the scene. Bella was in the bed breathing rather deeply what he assumed she was coming off from another contraction, Fives at her side trying to put on a strong face and not wincing as she grasped his hand. He took a damp rag that Laseema had handed over and lightly dabbed it onto her perspiring forehead. Ahsoka was on the opposite side with Bella's other hand and gently rubbing the top of her knuckles, Rex suppose she was filtering some of the Force to help aid with the pain.

As if sensing his presence, Ahsoka turned her head toward Rex and smiled. He just looked at her as if this was the first time he saw her. _So beautiful, _he sighed to himself. At nineteen, she was almost a full woman and not the squirrely kid had first met, though even then he knew she was special. It wasn't just her beauty that Rex loved so much, but her passion, her driving force and her want to be with him. It always surprised him when she chose him out of anyone in the galaxy. She chose him. And he had to ask her again.

A curious twinkle lit her sapphire eyes and she turned back to Bella, lightly murmuring something to her. Bella nodded and Rex could make out, "I'll be right here." Ahsoka gave her a supporting squeeze on her hand and gently placed it next to her body. He again watched her as her sultry form sauntered up to him and he found he wanted nothing more to ravish her. _No, not yet. Kest man, you go from a nervous cadet to a horny bantha. Get a grip!_

"Rex, are you sure you're okay?" Ahsoka placed a hand on his forehead to feel for a fever. He gently took her wrist and placed her much smaller hand into his larger one. "I could feel your anxiety all the way in here without even trying. Is your stomach bothering you? Don't play brave solider with me 'cause I'll find out." Her stern look only made him want her more.

"Can I steal you away for a few minutes?" Ahsoka looked over her shoulder back at Bella and Fives and then back at Rex. "The doctor said it could be a couple of hours." He looked so earnest, Ahsoka didn't want to say no. She nodded and with her hand still in his, she let him lead the way.

* * *

><p>Down stairs Besany sat uncomfortably on the sofa trying to ignore the sharp little pains in her stomach and back. <em>No, now's not a good time baby. <em>She shifted to find a better position for her back, but another sharp pain hit her. She winced and Ordo looked at her.

"Besany?" He asked.

"I'm okay Ordo," she patted his arm, trying to assure him.

"You look a little pale Bes," Corr placed his card down and waited for Ordo to make his move, but it never came.

"No, no, I'm okay," but a hiss escaped her lips and she placed a hand on her belly. Ordo and Corr both sat up straight and brown eyes widening.

As Ahsoka and Rex made their way down the stairs, Ahsoka froze. "Soka?" The howl for Mij Gilamar only came seconds after. Ahsoka and Rex rushed down the stairs to see Ordo and Corr assisting Besany up off the couch and halting as a large contraction hit her. She dug her fingers into their skin causing them to wince, but they didn't complain.

"You're going into labor?" Rex asked unbelievingly.

"Timing is everything, I know," Besany tried to smile, but another contraction hit her. The sound of running feet entered the room and Mij almost looked as incredulously as the rest of them.

Snapping into action, the doctor was at her side. "Do you think you can make it up the stairs? We can have you in the room across from Bella."

"I think so…" and at the sound of something splashing on the floor made everyone looked down. "Mij…" Besany said tensely.

"You're water broke. You're little boy wants out now!" Mij laughed as they made their way back up stairs. "Kal! You're about to have another grandson!"

"What?" Was the surprised reply from upstairs.

"We should go and help, Rex," Ahsoka looked around for a rag to clean up the floor. Finding one, she wiped up the mess and disposed of the rag and started to head back up stairs. Rex, renowned for his patience nodded, but found himself somewhat irritated. He wanted to tell Ahsoka what he taken so longed to find right now. _You've waited this long, you can wait a little longer. You were trained for patience…But I am not just a soldier anymore. _

"Actually I think I need some air for a minute. I'll be right back," Rex trotted out of the house before Ahsoka had a chance to respond. All this baby stuff was more overwhelming than any battle he had ever been on. Seeing a birth for the first time shook up the ex-captain more than he had thought possible. Perhaps he knew deep down it was because it could be one of the many futures that lay ahead for him. _I am ready, more than ever…aren't I? _Instead of answering his question, Rex spotted Thea and Cody walking gingerly a few hundred feet in front of him. With her arm securely wrapped around his waist, it looked to Rex that Cody was leaning most of his weight onto Thea's smaller form and worry coursed through the captain. Was his brother hurt? He had never seen Cody walk with such tentative care unless he was on a mission with a target on sight. Trotting down the steps of the porch, Rex made his way toward the couple, but his approach slowed as he neared. With their delicate hearing, Rex wasn't the least surprised as Cody quirked his head toward him and that was when Rex realized Cody wasn't hurt at all. He was sick and recognized that pained expression he had worn the same expression only days before.

"Cody," Rex breathed. He had honestly thought his brother wasn't going to take the shot. As much fight as Cody put up about not wanting help; about not caring of having a prolonged life, he had taken the shot. Why?

Both Thea and Cody turned completely around to face Rex, Cody looking as green as a Gungan's under belly and little beads of perspiration lined his forehead and dripped down the sides of his face.

"You should be in bed," Rex admonished lightly, knowing the pain his brother was in very well.

"I tried to argue with him about that," Thea narrowed her eyes at Cody, "but he became rather instant about it. I knew I should have tried harder."

Cody lightly shook his head and winced as the pounding in his head made the world around him spin. "I needed air and the cramps are much worse just sitting there." Cody's body proved him wrong as his knees buckled and thankfully Rex was there to help Thea catch Cody before he completely fell to the ground. Putting Cody's other arm around his shoulders; Rex let his friend lean most of his weight against him, taking it off of her.

"Are you going to argue now?" Rex sarcastically asked and Cody just scoured at him as Thea and Rex slowly led the sick man back to the house. "You'll have to use my room for now; it's a bit chaotic inside."

"More bolo ball tournaments? Didn't Corr and Fi learn from last time?" Cody moaned. Thea's grip tightened around his waist, her fingers tangling into Cody's shirt. Rex didn't miss the doting grasp she had on his friend.

Instead of probably embarrassing the _couple?_ Rex mentally shrugged; he tore his gaze away from her hand and back to Cody's sickly face. "Bella and Besany have both gone into labor," Rex explained.

"Both of them! Oh my!" Thea exclaimed. "How is Fives and Ordo?"

"Fives is what you call…" Rex searched for the appropriate word, "A wreck. I didn't even get a chance to talk with Ordo. Besany's water broke and they had to get her upstairs in a hurry."

"Why don't you go ahead, we'll catch up," Cody loosened his hold on Thea's shoulders and she looked up at him questioningly.

"I should help you first," Thea insisted.

Coming to a stop in front of the porch, Cody let his hand travel down her arm and took her hand into his, gently giving it a squeeze. Rex watched the display with curiosity. "I promise you I'll be in bed."

"You better," she lightly threatened. Letting go of his hand, Cody watched as Thea disappeared into the house and turned to his friend. "What?"

Slightly shaking his head Rex helped Cody up the steps taking their time and having to pause at the top as a series of gut twisting cramps consumed Cody's stomach. Helping Cody to the floor, he hunched himself into a tight ball and breathed in deeply, praying for this awfulness to be over with. Rex could only sympathize and wait until Cody was ready to move again. Hearing his soft curses, Rex finally felt the muscles in Cody's shoulders start to slightly relax.

"We need to get you in bed you dummy," Rex wrapped his strong fingers around Cody's arm and slowly began to stand.

"Just get me to a chair for a moment," Cody commanded.

"Cody…" Rex warned and tried to pull his brother toward the house, but Cody refused. Assisting him to the wicker chair, Rex helped Cody sit down and stood before him with his arms crossed over his chest. Something had drastically transformed within his brother in the last couple of days. Even with his eyes closed and head slightly tilted back as he tried to make the world stop spinning around him he seemed…freer.

"Why did you take it? Was it because of Thea?" Rex asked. He had to know, he had to know what made his brother change his mind for something so extreme. Craning his eyes open and raising his head, Cody viewed Rex with guarded consideration.

"Thea," Cody started a bit wistfully, "has given me a reason to keep breathing." Cody didn't elaborate anymore on him or Thea, but he knew Rex would understand with his own bond to the little Jedi.

"You remember Slick don't you?" The question caught Rex off guard. Of course he remembered the traitor, how could he forget? The man had dislocated Rex's leg as he and Cody were apprehending him. Slick had sold out to the Separatists, putting his fellow brethren at risk. It was the first act of insubordination and mutiny Rex could recall from his brothers.

"What about him Cody? He was a traitor to us all," Rex gruffly replied.

Cody raised a brow at his brother. "At the time of course we thought that and even now to some point he may still be. Ventress offered him money which didn't matter to any of us because we were pawns of the GAR. We didn't know any better. Slick, the man was a head of his time."

Cody had to be delirious from the shot, Rex was convinced of it. Slick was a traitor and endangered any clone that served in the GAR. What Cody was talking about was preposterous. Wasn't it?

"Before you and I took Slick in there was one thing he said that always stuck with me, even with the collapse of the Republic. Maybe that's why I could love Barriss guilt free. Maybe that's why you can love Ahsoka guilt free."

"What is it?" Rex demanded.

Cody took another deep breath of the fresh air and exhaled it from his mouth. "Ventress offered him something extremely important, something that sparked a desire and drove Slick to put his importance above all other else's. She offered him freedom. At the time Rex, did you understand freedom?"

_No,_ came the immediate response and that was why he had such a hard time separating the captain from the man. _But not anymore. _At the sound of Cody's voice, Rex returned his attention back upon him.

"I didn't. I loved the GAR, loved my brothers, but I treasured Barriss and what we dreamt up together. When I was with her, I understood what Slick meant to an extent. When she died, I lost my dreams and my freedom. I have been a slave to the new Empire, to angry citizens and to myself. I was just a lowly commander in a tyrant army. But I am more than a commander; I am more than a carbon copy of you or any of the men here. I am me and I am free. Are you?"

* * *

><p>After finally getting Cody to his and Ahsoka's bed and making sure his friend wouldn't get back up, Rex found himself bone weary. What had happened to running half the day, making sure the rookies were up to par, staying up for days on end so that the enemy couldn't get one step ahead of you, dodging blasters and carrying half your weight on your back? That had never slowed Rex down before so when did life get to be so tiresome? Resting his back against the closed bedroom door, Rex let Cody's last remark tease his mind. <em>I am free and I am me. Are you? Am I? Yes I am.<em>

He had to tell Ahsoka now, right now. Patience and protocol be damned. Pushing himself off the door, Rex walked/jogged out into the living room where the excitement was now building between Ordo's brothers and other residents. Not wanting to get distracted or sucked into a conversation, Rex hurried to the stairwell taking two at a time and made up to the second level and hurried to where he thought he would find Ahsoka. The door across from where Bella and Fives was shut, but Rex's receptive ears could hear the muffled voices and the strains of labored groans behind the door. Again, Rex could feel his heart start to beat a little faster and willed himself to be calm. Rolling his shoulders back, he carefully opened the door to Bella's room and entered.

"Ahsoka," his voice sounded different even to his own ears. Confident and strong, Rex never felt more assured in his life than he did right at this very moment. The young Togruta who had taken her place once again by the side of Bella turned ever so slightly toward him, sapphire orbs locking with heated honeyed-brown eyes. A chill coursed through her body and Rex knew she had felt the change in him.

"Rex," Ahsoka's voice caressed his sensitive ears and he wanted nothing more to have her keep saying his name, "Can't it wait?" She wasn't annoyed or irritated, but with Besany in the middle of birthing and Bella in labor, help was much needed. It was too much of a chaotic time to just get up and leave. But Rex shook his head.

"No," he answered and at Ahsoka's bemused expression he continued, "I have to ask you this _right now._"

Feeling a slight squeeze on her shoulder, she looked up at Thea who gave her a half smile. "I'm here Ahsoka. Go to him." Even as tired as she was, Bella gave the young girl a reassuring smile. With a small nod, Ahsoka slipped from her seat and approached Rex. Closing the door behind them, Ahsoka waited for Rex to ask what he thought was so urgent.

"Will you marry me?" Rex asked. She again looked him as if he had two heads.

"Rex, I already said yes," she sighed. How many times did she have to prove and confirm with him? How many times did he have to hear yes from her lips? Didn't he know that she belonged to him?

"No, Ahs'ika, you don't understand," the words flew from his lips in a rush, "I'm not asking you as a captain to his commander or a clone to a Jedi. I am asking you as a man to a woman. As a man, Ahsoka, will you marry me?"

Her mouth dropped open and Ahsoka was left speechless. Rex's heart pounded in his chest as he waited for a response. He could feel his palms start to sweat; the tips of his fingers twitch with building nervousness. _Please respond…_and a response he got. Ahsoka flung herself into his embrace, Rex feeling the air completely leaving his lungs with a whoosh and his arms automatically encircling around her small fame.

"Yes Rex!" Ahsoka exclaimed. "Oh Rex, yes, yes, yes!" As he spun her in his arms the first time his life he felt like a free man.

* * *

><p><em>And rise again<em>  
><em>You're not done yet<em>  
><em>I know<em>  
><em>Let Go<em>

* * *

><p><em>A BIG thank you to<em> **EVERYONE** _ who took the time to read and review this story. You all made it worthwhile and pushed me to keep going =)_

_The lyrics to the song I used is from **Let Go **by **Everest. **_

_I realize I left some unfinished business with a few of the couples so the story isn't really finished. There will be some epiloges to conclude and close the story completely. _

_Hope you have enjoyed it! As always please let me know what you think. _


	25. Awake & Alive

_Hi All,_

_Thank you very much for taking the time to read and review this story! I am so happy that you have enjoyed Let Go. As sad as I am to say this, the story is now complete and just a few epliogues to fill in some missing holes. Here is the first._

_Enjoy! As always, please review!_

* * *

><p>Not even the thickest of walls could hide the sounds of the sweet wails of a baby's cry. As Fives stood next to his wife Bella, letting her grasp his hand in a vice grip as wave after wave of contractions hit, he knew that that sound would fill this room all too soon. And he was ready.<p>

Rex and Ahsoka had not return which he found was okay, perhaps Fives feeling that he didn't need everyone's support and concentration divided. He just hoped that his captain, his friend was okay. _Worry about that later, _he admonished himself. The only other person in the room besides him and Bella was Thea who held Bella's other hand in support.

Taking anxious eyes off his beautiful wife for a moment, he glanced at the red-headed woman at the other side of the bed. Not just another woman, but his sister. Yes…she would have been his sister-in-law if Echo was still around, _but he's not completely gone now is he? _As if sensing she was being watched, Thea turned to find Fives staring at her and she gave him a smile. _No, you may have lost a brother, but you have gained a sister. _As he opened his mouth to speak, the door opened and Mij stepped in.

"How's Besany and Ordo?" Bella asked between breaths.

"The new parents are tired but elated. A healthy baby boy with the whitest blond hair you have ever seen," Mij laughed. "Mom and baby are doing fantastic. Ordo couldn't puff out his chest more if he wanted."

It was only a matter of time Fives knew that he would be doing the same thing. Another contraction hit Bella and her grip once again tightened on his hand; this time he noticed her delicate lekku had turned a darker shade of blue and curled at the ends. "Bella?" Fives asked concerned, some nerves leaking through. This contraction was much different than the previous ones.

"I think she's getting close," Bella breathed and looked up at her husband with worry, anxiousness and excitement all mixed in her jaded eyes.

Mij confirmed with a short nod of agreement. Within minutes, the Mando doctor had the mother-to-be ready for delivery. "Okay Bella I need you to push," Mij lightly commanded. Taking a deep breath, Bella pushed with all her might. A long and deep moan slipped through her slightly parted lips and Fives could only wish away the pain.

"Almost there, cyar'ika," Fives encouraged.

"One more big push, Bella. Come on ad'ika." She was so tired, but the end was in sight. With one more heavy push and a shriek, Bella and Fives were rewarded with the most wonderful sound ever heard. Bella flopped heavily back onto the bed and listened to their baby girl's cries.

"Congratulations," Mij beamed at the new parents as he cleaned and wrapped the newborn, "you have a healthy baby girl." Mij handed the newly wrapped bundle over to the proud father and Fives gently took her into his arms. Any hesitation, any fear he had before about being a father flew out the door as he gazed down at his daughter.

Her little eyes peered open at him and he knew he was hooked forever. His life would forever be devoted to keeping her safe and happy. "Hello little Ekho, I'm your daddy," Fives softly cooed. Like her mother, baby Ekho was a brilliant shade of blue, but she didn't have the yellow stripping as Bella did and her face had a tan tint to it. Because of her human heritage she wouldn't have as long as lekku either.

Her little eyes gazed trustingly at her father. "You will have nothing to fear my little princess. The galaxy is yours." Fives took his finger and lightly caressed the newborn's cheek as she were glass ready to shatter. "There's someone else dying to meet you, little one. Let's meet your mommy."

Fives gently handed baby Ekho into her awaiting mother's arms and a soft sob escaped out of Bella's mouth. "Oh Fives," Bella let a happy tear escape as she gazed down at her daughter. "We did it."

Thea watched the new family and tried to hold in her own tears. She was proud and excited for her friends, but could not stop the sorrow from building within her. _Echo…that could have been me and Echo…_The tear would not be restrained and slipped down her porcelain cheek.

Fives looked up and saw his friend, a frown taking over his smile. "Thea?" He asked concerned.

She quickly wiped her face and smiled. "I'm so proud of you two. She's absolutely beautiful you guys. I know Echo would have been a proud uncle. Congratulations." Thea gave Bella a gentle squeeze on her shoulder and made to leave to give the new parents some privacy when Fives deep and tired voice called to her. Quickly standing up and rounding the bed, he stood before the red-headed woman.

"Having you here, having you a part of our family means a lot to us, to me. The day that Echo died I lost my brother, but I gained something to be treasured as well. I gained a sister. Bella and I would be honored if you would consider yourself our daughter's aunt."

"Fives," Thea gulped and had to clear her throat. The overwhelming emotions threatened to spill and caused her to lose her voice. "Fives…" Again, the tears overcame her voice. She glanced over his shoulder to see the new mother tired, but beaming her jaded eyes at her. "You want me to be a part of your family?" Thea asked hoarsely.

"You were already a part of it, Thea. I guess this just makes it a bit more official and open," Bella smiled.

Turning her brown glistening eyes upon the man before her, Thea took Fives hand into hers and whispered, "It would be my honor…brother." With that, she lightly kissed the side of his cheek and floated out of the room.

Returning to his wife and newborn daughter's side, Fives watched with delighted contentment as little Ekho fed from her mother's breast. "Thank you Bella," he murmured. "Thank you for giving me a future that I never thought possible. Thank you for giving us our daughter."

Little Ekho had finished eating and had now closed her sleepy hazel eyes, drifting off into an easy sleep safely tucked in her mother's arms. Warmth and love coursed through Bella as she gazed down at their little creation. Forever Ekho would prove the bond of hers and Fives love for one another; forever prove beyond any expectations that Fives creators had in mind for him.

"Fives," Bella softly sighed. She slightly turned and looked adoringly at her husband. Reaching forward with her hand, she cupped his cheek and felt him press into her and felt the soft caress of his lips against her wrist. "Anything is possible as a free man. I love you my husband; father of my child."

Placing a kiss on Bella's lips, the new parents settled themselves as they watched baby Ekho with exhausted serenity.

_This little light of mine, I'm gonna let it shine,_ Fives remembered the little song from his dream and began to hum the soft tune, _This little light of mine I'm gonna let it shine. Oh let it shine, let it shine let it shine. _"Ni kar'tayl gar darasuum, my sweet Bella and Ekho."

* * *

><p>In your arms I feel you breathe into me<br>Forever hold this heart that I will give to you  
>Forever I will live for you<p>

~Awake & Alive by Skillet


	26. Let Go

"Thea," his rich accent caused her hand to freeze on the door knob, her body going taught and dared not to turn around. Despite the heavy armor and well plated boots, he was able to walk up to her with quiet stealth. Giving her enough space, he quietly asked, "Please look at me." Thea briefly closed her eyes and pinched her lips together. Why did life have to be so complicated? Inwardly sighing, Thea let go of the door knob and turned around. Bardan Jusik stood before her not as a Jedi, not as a Mandalorian, but as a man seeking an answer.

"I finally stopped running," Thea spoke softly, but there was strength behind her words. His eyes had become a dark indigo; storming with unsaid emotions.

"Did the monster ever catch you?" He took a step closer to her and even without the almighty Force, Thea could sense the churning current generate off of him.

"It tried, oh Bardan it tried so hard. I almost let it devour me," Thea let out a somber sigh. "But I have you and Cody to thank for not letting me fall victim to my own darkness." There was a small tick at the corner of Bardan's mouth that Thea almost missed, almost, but not quite. With the side of her hand, she gently caressed the top of his forehead brushing a few of his stray golden locks away from his eyes and then down the side of his face. Bardan closed his eyes relishing in her touch and let out a soft breath. "Thank you for being my friend."

He only opened his eyes as the contact was broken. "Thea," Bardan started. Looking into her dark, trusting eyes he couldn't say what he came to tell her. She already knew and it would only hurt both of them. Instead he murmured, "Take care of him okay?"

With a sad smile, Thea gently nodded her head. "I will Bardan."

* * *

><p>As she watched the figure lay miserably on the bed curled into a fetal position and trembling under the blankets, Thea's heart went out to Cody. She quietly approached him and wished she could do more than just offer words of sympathy to him. Feeling old nerves start to build within, Thea quickly pushed them away and went with her gut instinct. She climbed into the bed as gently as she could cocooned her body around his much larger one, slipping her arm under his tightly clenched one. The trembles seemed to ease as she lightly pressed her warmth against his and even could feel Cody breathe a sigh of relief.<p>

Yes, she missed Echo, the ache when she saw that little baby named after her fallen love painfully started to dull and as she lay curled up to Cody she realized it didn't have to hurt anymore. She had a family now; she belonged somewhere and with someone.

"I love you Cody," she whispered into his ear.

* * *

><p>"Where will you go?" Ahsoka asked as she helped Thea finish prepping her small ship.<p>

As the two women sat alone in the cockpit, Thea paused and looked out the window, a small smile forming at the corner of her scarred mouth. "Second star to the right and straight on till morning." The young Togruta Jedi blinked a few times and then busted into a fit a giggles. Thea soon followed.

As their laughter abated, Thea wiped the tears from her eyes and asked curiously, "What about you and Rex? What will you guys do now?"

Taking a few breaths Ahsoka crossed her legs onto the chair, popping her arms on them and resting her chin onto of her knuckles. Looking thoughtfully at her friend, she blissfully answered, "Anything we want to. Time is on our side. Thea?"

"Humm?"

"Are you still afraid?"

Thea chewed on the side of her cheek. Was she still afraid? "No Ahsoka. Not anymore."

A wide smile that reached to her sapphire eyes blossomed on Ahsoka's face. "Me neither."

* * *

><p>So take a breath<br>My dear friend  
>Take it slow<br>And let go

-Let Go by Everest

* * *

><p><em>First off a big thank you to <strong>Queen, Lalgoa, Jadesnowtiger, Jess Marylin, Janizary, DoubleEO and Sachariah <strong>for your wonderful awesomeness! _

_*Second star to the right...belongs to Peter Pan* I just borrowed it ; )_

_One more Epilogue to come...Rex/Ahsoka_


	27. You're A Dream To Me

When Cody was well enough for travel, Thea and him had graciously offered Ahsoka and Rex a ride back to Saleucami. With a tearful goodbye: no not goodbye, but a see you later to the Skirata clan, the four of them settled in for a short ride to the trade planet.

"Where will you go?" Rex asked his brother. Cody lightly shrugged and ever so slightly turned his head to peer at the back of red-headed woman who he had fallen for.

"Where ever it is," he turned back around and with newly found confidence, looked at Rex. The empty shell of a man Rex had encountered only two weeks ago had all but vanished; replaced by the resilient, strong brother he respected for all those years. In Cody's chestnut eyes, Rex could still the battle wager inside, but knowing he was on the right course, knowing he had the strength to fight helped Rex see that his brother would be okay.

Cody continued, "Where ever it may be, where ever we go, we'll always be brothers." Cody held out his arm; Rex without hesitation grasped Cody by his bicep in a Mando-fashion shake. Being on Mandalore Rex had learned a few terms; one especially sticking with him.

"Ner Vod," said Rex.

"Ner Vod," Cody affirmed.

* * *

><p>It was a happy home coming at the Lawquane household and with the news of Rex's proposal to Ahsoka and Ahsoka's acceptance and the bigger surprise of the anti-aging serum for Cut, life for everyone seemed just about as perfect as it could get. That is if there wasn't a new Empire building and Jedi and deserter hunters out there and other's struggling trying to survive under the new regime's malicious hold.<p>

Ahsoka sighed as she watched the crystal blue waterfall pour over the small rock wall into the pool beneath it. The water was so clear that she could see everything in it, right to the bottom. As much as they wanted a honeymoon, both Ahsoka and Rex insisted on Cut taking the serum as soon as possible. Rex had warned of the side effects and promised Cut and Suu that they would be around at least until he was fully recovered.

As soon as Cut was better, Suu had ushered the couple away so that they could have a proper night alone for their bonding. With the help of Suu and Cut giving them a few extra credits, not before Rex and Ahsoka vowed to pay them back, finding a cheap shuttle wasn't hard, finding a planet that wasn't inhabited by Imperials was. Having to go to the furthest of Outer Rim territories, they found themselves on the tropical planet of Aaries III.

_How many will ever enjoy a peaceful moment like this? None I suppose. I should not be here sitting on my…what did Skirata call it? Ah yes, shebs, and just watching water fall. I have to do something. I need to do something. Where should I start?_

Another sigh escaped past Ahsoka's lips and the crunching of brush under foot made her cock her head somewhat looking back at the man she had loved for so long. She closely examined Rex, who was now only dressed in baggy cargo pants. Naturally tanned and well-toned, his body wasn't as stiff as it had been. The hard lines around his eyes were still there, but faint as were the ones around his mouth. He was relaxed for the first time Ahsoka remembered and he looked even younger. Sitting beside her, he let his legs dangle over the edge, soaking his pants into the cool water.

"What's on your mind Ahs'ika?" His deep voice rumbled.

"This is paradise," She murmured. A native bird in the distance sang a melodious song only to be answered by another.

"And?" Rex prodded.

Turning her head back around and resting her chin on her propped up knees, Ahsoka let out a raspberry. "I don't know."

"Yes you do," she could feel Rex's heated gaze on her.

"You know me too well," A smile lifted at the corner of her mouth.

"That's what a husband is supposed to do," Rex let the new term roll off his tongue. _Husband. Who would of thought? _"What do you want to do Ahsoka?"

Again, turning her head toward Rex, letting her cheek rest on her legs, a wicked gleam twinkled in her eyes. Rex suddenly sat up rigid and his skin broke out in goose bumps.

_The galaxy can wait. _

Unfolding her legs, Ahsoka and Rex kept their eyes locked on each other right up to the point where she slid into the water. Rex never let his gaze break. As she came back up to the surface, he admired the droplets trickling from her glowing skin. Her orange color seemed to turn a deep red/orange, her montrals and lekku stripes, darker. Rex didn't know how, but her blue eyes were now a rich navy and her burgundy lips seemed fuller. With a little splash of the water, her hand lifted and like a siren from the sea she beckoned to him. Rex did not need to be told twice. Not even bothering to shed from his pants, Rex quickly and almost clumsily slid in to the water, pausing a moment to let his body adjust to the coolness.

Ahsoka once again dipped her lithe body into the crystal water and he watched as she swam right up to him, barely peeking her head above the surface.

Rex bent his legs so that he was at her level, the passion sparking a fire between them. It was different this time and they both knew it. He stood before her not as a clone captain pretending to be a man, but as a man, as a husband and as her protector.

She was not only a Jedi, but a woman and his _wife._

He wrapped his fingers around her petite waist, bringing her up against his needing body. She wasn't clad in much, only the basic of bathing suits and it all had to go. Rex had never needed someone as much as he needed her. Every ounce of him cried to be with her, in her; a part of her.

"Ahs'ika," Rex growled, as she wrapped her athletic legs around his hips. Her fingers trailed down his abs, to his navel stopping at his belt buckle. "Take it off," he demanded into her ear.

"Patience husband," she whispered. Rex trembled but not from the cold of the water or even the desire that coursed through his veins.

"Say it again," he murmured. His arms began to tremble and even in the water his legs grew weak.

"Husband," she kissed his ear. Ahoska lifted her hands out of the water and gently stroked the sides of Rex's face. A day's worth of light stubble began to line his jaw and tickled her skin. "Do you feel it Rex?" Rex felt something, but probably not what she was implying. "Listen Rex, feel for it," she encouraged.

His nerves were standing on edge, every hair on his body tingled and ready. Then suddenly he felt the gentle brush of his mind. "_Rex, can you feel me? Can you hear me?" _Rex gasped, his already dark eyes dilating to a deep ebony. She nudged a little harder and he shivered violently against her. "_Bonded through hearts and mind, as one Rex I will be yours as you will be mine."_

With sudden ferocity, Rex crushed her lips to his. He didn't know how since his brain was on hyper drive, but his fingers untied her bathing suit top and he carelessly tossed it into the water as Ahsoka worked on his pants. In moments they were naked as the day that they were born and vated. Breaking for much needed air, Ahsoka rested her forehead against his, feeling his chest heave against her own.

"Mine…" he growled again. "Wife."

"Mine," she purred, "husband."

* * *

><p>It wasn't until much later, as the Aaries III sun began to set and the cobalt sky started to take its place, Rex slowly sat up from the soft ground he and Ahsoka had consummated their love on. Glancing down at the woman beside him, he gently ran his hand down her silky arm, watching as a content smile lifted on her lips.<p>

"Rex," Ahsoka rolled onto her back and opened her eyes only to shine brightly up at him. He leaned over her, one arm on either side of her and their mouths only a breath a part, Rex could feel the warm puffs against his face. He would forever lock in this perfect moment in his memory and no one would be able to take it away from him. "Með þér vandræði mín eru yfir, og ég er loksins kominn heim."

"What does that mean?" He whispered against her lips.

"With you my troubles are over, and I am finally home."

* * *

><p>You're what I couldn't find<br>Totally amazing mind  
>So understanding and so kind<br>You're everything to me

-Dreams by the Cranberries

* * *

><p><em>The End.<em>

_Thank you **ALL** __for being such wonderful readers and reviewers. You made all the worthwhile. _

_"My trouble are over..." is a quote from Black Beauty by Anna Swell._

_Please stay updated for more stories to come. I will be working on some side stories featuring Thea, Bella, Ahsoka Rex, Cody and Fives! _

_Thank you again! =) _


End file.
